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How To Have Mind-Blowing Multiple Orgasms. Tonight, Chile.

Because the only thing better than one orgasm is back-to-back ones.

Sex

It's almost like I can hear some of y'all coming right through the computer screen. "Shellie, I'm over here trying to make sure that I have an orgasm on the regular and here you come, talking about some multiple ones?" Yep. That's exactly what I'm doing because one, life is short and two, the only thing better than climaxing is climaxing as much as possible. Besides, having more than one orgasm really isn't as semi-impossible of a feat as it might seem. The main two things to keep in mind is 1) typically multiple orgasms are a string of weaker ones that come close together and 2) there are "hacks" that can definitely help you to make this all happen.

So, if tonight is the night that you want to take your sexual experience to another level, check these 9 hacks out, forward them on to your partner, and then get ready to become the woman who can say that you've successfully experienced each phase of an orgasm—excitement, plateau, orgasm, resolution—not just once but several times in one sex sitting. Ready?

1. Become an Edging Master

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OK, here's a reading hack to keep in mind. If you want to know if an article on orgasms is worth your time, skim it real quick to see if edging is mentioned at all. The reason why is because, if you want to have an orgasm, intensify your orgasm or increase your chances of experiencing a multiple orgasm, the act of edging has to be factored into the equation.

If you're not familiar with what edging is, it's basically sexually stimulating yourself and/or your partner, to the point of climaxing—but then stopping before it actually happens. While edging can be achieved in a myriad of different ways, arousal via touching erogenous zones and/or oral sex are ideal. Just remember that this particular tip isn't about achieving an orgasm, let alone a multiple one; it's about getting you right to the brink, then pulling back, so that once you are ready to "go", it will be truly mind-blowing—and so much easier for you to repeat the action over and over again.

2. Learn As Much About Your Refractory Period As You Can

When it comes to orgasms, there's something known as the sexual response cycle. I pretty much touched on it in the intro. It's the cycle that includes the phases of excitement (or desire), plateau (or arousal), orgasm (or climax) and then resolution. Excitement is when you start to get sexually stimulated in the sense that your heart rate increases, your nipples become erect and your vagina increases with lubrication. Plateau is when blood flow increases to your genitalia, your clitoris becomes really sensitive and the muscles within your pelvis start to tense up. Orgasm is when your blood pressure and heart rate are at their highest (in the sexual cycle), the muscles in your pelvis begin to contract and you start to feel warm all over your body. Resolution is when your body starts to come down off of this "high" and you begin to feel more like "normal" again.

Now your refractory period is the time between resolution and excitement. That said, one of the main "hacks" to experiencing a multiple orgasm is learning what your refractory period actually is. For some women, it's literally a few seconds while, for others, it may take several minutes. Yet if you are intentional about not taking more than a 60-90 seconds to "calm down" from all of the sensitivity you may feel before being open to getting sexually stimulated all over again, there is a really good chance that you can experience orgasms back-to-back.

3. Appeal to ALL Senses (Simultaneously If You Can)

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Back when I wrote the article, "Ever Wonder What The Sounds You Make During Sex Mean?", a part of the purpose was to remind us all that a great sex session should include all five of our senses being fully and thoroughly stimulated—sight, smell, touch, hearing and taste. Since I just broke down the importance of knowing what transpires during your refractory period, something that can help you to get back into the phases of an orgasm quicker is if some of your senses continue to be stimulated while you are in the phase of resolution.

For instance, if after you cum, consider having your partner talk dirty to you (hearing) or offer to give you a massage with a DIY aphrodisiac massage oil like sandalwood or jasmine (smell). Definitely, a mistake that people make, in the effort of having more intense or multiple orgasms is, after the first orgasm is achieved, they stop all activity altogether. While being super sensitive right after you cum is perfectly natural, remember that touch isn't the only sense you've got. Your partner doing a little strip tease (sight) or the two of you feeding each other some chocolate-covered strawberries (taste) can still keep you plenty interested—and get you to the first phase of an orgasm all over again: excitement.

4. Bring Weed into the Equation

One of the main reasons why a lot of us—and by "us", I mean women—have trouble climaxing us because—surprise, surprise—we tend to overthink it. Whether it's a doctor, a sex therapist or even your bestie who hangs off of chandeliers on the regular, something that all of them can agree on is a tensing up only makes getting to the Big O that much more difficult to reach. If you know this in theory but you still struggle with finding ways to relax either before or during sex, something that can help you out is weed. I actually wrote an article not too long ago for the platform that explains that weed can do things like make you feel less anxious and reduce feelings of discomfort. And, if you bring some weed lubricant into the equation, that can make stimulation even more intense and orgasms—including multiple orgasms—so much easier to have. (Check out "7 Proven Ways Weed Makes Sex So Much Better" and "Why Cannabis Lube Is The Best Thing To Get Yourself For V-Day" for more info.)

5. Create a Safe Word

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Listen, if there's one thing that you cannot be—if you want to experience as many orgasms as possible, that is—is inhibited. In other words, you're gonna have to chill out, completely let go and be open to trying some new things. So, in the effort to join the "multiple orgasms club", the next time you have sex, let your partner know that you're pretty much down for whatever; except with one caveat. You've got to be able to incorporate a safe word—like a color or something that is easy to remember—so that if something becomes uncomfortable or even painful, you can immediately alert your partner without the two of you needing to stop sex completely.

6. Get into Two Classic Sex Positions

It wouldn't be a thorough article on how to achieve multiple orgasms if I didn't share, at least a couple of positions that can help you to reach your goal. Remember that a key to experiencing orgasms, one right after the other, is to get into a place where you can close-to-guarantee that you will climax at all. Two sex positions that can get you pretty damn close to this goal is the reverse cowgirl and doggy style.

As far as the reverse cowgirl, the key is to straddle one of your partner's legs instead of both. That way, you can get more deeply penetrated while better controlling the movement of your own pelvis. As far as doggy style goes, doing a modification of it by laying on your stomach instead of being on your knees can make it easier for either your hands or his to stimulate your clitoris during intercourse. When you're able to maneuver more easily, you can apply as much pressure as you need to cum, then wait, and then cum all over again.

7. Stimulate More than One Erogenous Zone

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When it comes to experiencing orgasms back-to-back, something that isn't brought up, nearly enough in my opinion, is the fact that focusing on achieving orgasms in multiple places should also be explored far more often. What do I mean by that?

Orgasms are able to happen in more than just our vaginal area. Some women are able to achieve nipplegasms or even be brought to the brink of an orgasm, simply by having their favorite erogenous zones touched. That's why it should never be ignored that another way to have an orgasm is by achieving one via the stimulation of your genitalia and then having a hot spot like your neck, ears, navel, inner thighs or even your lips caressed or kissed during your refractory period in order to get right back to the plateau and then orgasm mountaintop all over again.

8. Breathe Deeply

Something else that plays a direct role on how intensely and often you are able to climax is how deeply you breathe. As I've already shared, orgasms are a series of muscle contractions in your pelvic region. So, while that part of your body tenses up, breathing slowly and deeply helps to relax you and create a powerful sensation as you reach your peak. As far as what you need to do specifically in the breathing department, I actually found a cool article on The Sex Ed site that explains everything very well. Read "Orgasmic Breathing" and share it with your friends. They'll owe you. Trust me.

9. RELAX

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It truly can't be said enough—in order to have multiple orgasms, you're gonna need to freakin' relax. This includes fully trusting your partner. This includes not being shy about your body. This also means not going into your next sexual experience with multiple orgasms being your "aim" so much as it's something that you're completely open to doing. If all three of these things come into play and you literally sit back and enjoy the ride—you might surprise your own self when it comes to how easily you can experience multiple orgasms. Have lots and loads of fun...over and over and over again, sis.

Join our xoTribe, an exclusive community dedicated to YOU and your stories and all things xoNecole. Be a part of a growing community of women from all over the world who come together to uplift, inspire, and inform each other on all things related to the glow up.

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ACLU By ACLUSponsored

Over the past four years, we grew accustomed to a regular barrage of blatant, segregationist-style racism from the White House. Donald Trump tweeted that “the Squad," four Democratic Congresswomen who are Black, Latinx, and South Asian, should “go back" to the “corrupt" countries they came from; that same year, he called Elizabeth Warren “Pocahontas," mocking her belief that she might be descended from Native American ancestors.

But as outrageous as the racist comments Trump regularly spewed were, the racially unjust governmental actions his administration took and, in the case of COVID-19, didn't take, impacted millions more — especially Black and Brown people.

To begin to heal and move toward real racial justice, we must address not only the harms of the past four years, but also the harms tracing back to this country's origins. Racism has played an active role in the creation of our systems of education, health care, ownership, and employment, and virtually every other facet of life since this nation's founding.

Our history has shown us that it's not enough to take racist policies off the books if we are going to achieve true justice. Those past policies have structured our society and created deeply-rooted patterns and practices that can only be disrupted and reformed with new policies of similar strength and efficacy. In short, a systemic problem requires a systemic solution. To combat systemic racism, we must pursue systemic equality.

What is Systemic Racism?

A system is a collection of elements that are organized for a common purpose. Racism in America is a system that combines economic, political, and social components. That system specifically disempowers and disenfranchises Black people, while maintaining and expanding implicit and explicit advantages for white people, leading to better opportunities in jobs, education, and housing, and discrimination in the criminal legal system. For example, the country's voting systems empower white voters at the expense of voters of color, resulting in an unequal system of governance in which those communities have little voice and representation, even in policies that directly impact them.

Systemic Equality is a Systemic Solution

In the years ahead, the ACLU will pursue administrative and legislative campaigns targeting the Biden-Harris administration and Congress. We will leverage legal advocacy to dismantle systemic barriers, and will work with our affiliates to change policies nearer to the communities most harmed by these legacies. The goal is to build a nation where every person can achieve their highest potential, unhampered by structural and institutional racism.

To begin, in 2021, we believe the Biden administration and Congress should take the following crucial steps to advance systemic equality:

Voting Rights

The administration must issue an executive order creating a Justice Department lead staff position on voting rights violations in every U.S. Attorney office. We are seeing a flood of unlawful restrictions on voting across the country, and at every level of state and local government. This nationwide problem requires nationwide investigatory and enforcement resources. Even if it requires new training and approval protocols, a new voting rights enforcement program with the participation of all 93 U.S. Attorney offices is the best way to help ensure nationwide enforcement of voting rights laws.

These assistant U.S. attorneys should begin by ensuring that every American in the custody of the Bureau of Prisons who is eligible to vote can vote, and monitor the Census and redistricting process to fight the dilution of voting power in communities of color.

We are also calling on Congress to pass the John Lewis Voting Rights Advancement Act to finally create a fair and equal national voting system, the cause for which John Lewis devoted his life.

Student Debt

Black borrowers pay more than other students for the same degrees, and graduate with an average of $7,400 more in debt than their white peers. In the years following graduation, the debt gap more than triples. Nearly half of Black borrowers will default within 12 years. In other words, for Black Americans, the American dream costs more. Last week, Majority Leader Chuck Schumer and Sen. Elizabeth Warren, along with House Reps. Ayanna Pressley, Maxine Waters, and others, called on President Biden to cancel up to $50,000 in federal student loan debt per borrower.

We couldn't agree more. By forgiving $50,000 of student debt, President Biden can unleash pent up economic potential in Black communities, while relieving them of a burden that forestalls so many hopes and dreams. Black women in particular will benefit from this executive action, as they are proportionately the most indebted group of all Americans.

Postal Banking

In both low and high income majority-Black communities, traditional bank branches are 50 percent more likely to close than in white communities. The result is that nearly 50 percent of Black Americans are unbanked or underbanked, and many pay more than $2,000 in fees associated with subprime financial institutions. Over their lifetime, those fees can add up to as much as two years of annual income for the average Black family.

The U.S. Postal Service can and should meet this crisis by providing competitive, low-cost financial services to help advance economic equality. We call on President Biden to appoint new members to the Postal Board of Governors so that the Post Office can do the work of providing essential services to every American.

Fair Housing

Across the country, millions of people are living in communities of concentrated poverty, including 26 percent of all Black children. The Biden administration should again implement the 2015 Affirmatively Furthering Fair Housing rule, which required localities that receive federal funds for housing to investigate and address barriers to fair housing and patterns or practices that promote bias. In 1980, the average Black person lived in a neighborhood that was 62 percent Black and 31 percent white. By 2010, the average Black person's neighborhood was 48 percent Black and 34 percent white. Reinstating the Obama-era Fair Housing Rule will combat this ongoing segregation and set us on a path to true integration.

Congress should also pass the American Housing and Economic Mobility Act, or a similar measure, to finally redress the legacy of redlining and break down the walls of segregation once and for all.

Broadband Access

To realize broadband's potential to benefit our democracy and connect us to one another, all people in the United States must have equal access and broadband must be made affordable for the most vulnerable. Yet today, 15 percent of American households with school-age children do not have subscriptions to any form of broadband, including one-quarter of Black households (an additional 23 percent of African Americans are “smartphone-only" internet users, meaning they lack traditional home broadband service but do own a smartphone, which is insufficient to attend class, do homework, or apply for a job). The Biden administration, Federal Communications Commission, and Congress must develop and implement plans to increase funding for broadband to expand universal access.

Enhanced, Refundable Child Tax Credits

The United States faces a crisis of child poverty. Seventeen percent of all American children are impoverished — a rate higher than not just peer nations like Canada and the U.K., but Mexico and Russia as well. Currently, more than 50 percent of Black and Latinx children in the U.S. do not qualify for the full benefit, compared to 23 percent of white children, and nearly one in five Black children do not receive any credit at all.

To combat this crisis, President Biden and Congress should enhance the child tax credit and make it fully refundable. If we enhance the child tax credit, we can cut child poverty by 40 percent and instantly lift over 50 percent of Black children out of poverty.

Reparations

We cannot repair harms that we have not fully diagnosed. We must commit to a thorough examination of the impact of the legacy of chattel slavery on racial inequality today. In 2021, Congress must pass H.R. 40, which would establish a commission to study reparations and make recommendations for Black Americans.

The Long View

For the past century, the ACLU has fought for racial justice in legislatures and in courts, including through several landmark Supreme Court cases. While the court has not always ruled in favor of racial justice, incremental wins throughout history have helped to chip away at different forms of racism such as school segregation ( Brown v. Board), racial bias in the criminal legal system (Powell v. Alabama, i.e. the Scottsboro Boys), and marriage inequality (Loving v. Virginia). While these landmark victories initiated necessary reforms, they were only a starting point.

Systemic racism continues to pervade the lives of Black people through voter suppression, lack of financial services, housing discrimination, and other areas. More than anything, doing this work has taught the ACLU that we must fight on every front in order to overcome our country's legacies of racism. That is what our Systemic Equality agenda is all about.

In the weeks ahead, we will both expand on our views of why these campaigns are crucial to systemic equality and signal the path this country must take. We will also dive into our work to build organizing, advocacy, and legal power in the South — a region with a unique history of racial oppression and violence alongside a rich history of antiracist organizing and advocacy. We are committed to four principles throughout this campaign: reconciliation, access, prosperity, and empowerment. We hope that our actions can meet our ambition to, as Dr. King said, lead this nation to live out the true meaning of its creed.

What you can do:
Take the pledge: Systemic Equality Agenda
Sign up

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Sometimes, when things are a little "off" when it comes to our health, there are simple steps that we can take to get ourselves back on track. For instance, did you know that around 92 percent of Americans are considered to be vitamin or mineral deficient in some way? And since there are core nutrients that all of us need in order to function properly, it's important that we're aware of what certain deficiencies are directly linked to.

Today, that is the focus. Here are eight health-related issues that, oftentimes, if we'd just add more of a vitamin or mineral into our system, we will start to feel better in no time (technically a couple of weeks but you get my drift).

1. Muscle Cramping

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Something that happens randomly to me sometimes is I'll have a muscle that cramps up, seemingly out of nowhere. Then I'll snack on a banana and start to feel better. You know why? It's because bananas are high in potassium and potassium is a nutrient that our system needs in order for our muscles to easily contract. If you sweat a lot or don't have enough fluids in your system, you can become a high candidate for being potassium deficient. As far as how much your body requires on a daily basis, it's somewhere between 3,000-4,000 mg a day. Foods that are a good source of this mineral (that is also an electrolyte) include mushrooms, zucchini, cucumbers, sweet potatoes and lentils.

2. Lip Cracking

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If your PMS is off the chain or you've been catching a lot of colds lately, it could be because you need some more Vitamin B6 in your life. However, a telling sign that this is almost definitely the case is if the corners of your lips are cracking or even if your tongue feels a bit swollen.

The main thing to keep in mind with this point is if you're noticing indications that you could stand to have more Vitamin B6, there's a pretty good chance that your system has gotten close to totally running out. And just how much does your body need of this vitamin on the daily? About 1.3 mg. Up it up to 1.5 mg if you're over the age of 50.

Foods that are loaded with Vitamin B6 are peanuts, poultry, oats, avocados and pistachios.

3. Brittle Nails

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If it seems like no matter how much pampering you do to your nails, they are brittle and breaking, that could be an indication that you are low in iron and/or Vitamin C. The reality is that just our periods alone can make us vulnerable to having lower iron levels. And just how much should you be getting into your system? A lot of healthcare professionals recommend somewhere around 14.8 mg each day. As far as the Vitamin C goes, not only can you have brittle nails when you're not getting enough of it, this is a nutrient that makes it easier for your body to absorb iron too. 75 mg per day of it is recommended (120 mg each day if you're pregnant or are breastfeeding). Foods that are high in iron include beef, dark leafy greens, quinoa, pumpkin seeds and broccoli. Foods that are a good source of Vitamin C include citrus fruits, peppers, potatoes, berries and Brussel sprouts.

4. Allergy Symptoms

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If you've got allergy symptoms that are driving you totally up the wall or you're someone who deals with asthma or eczema, these things can be so much worse for you if you are low in omega-3. Long story short, they're fatty acids that pretty much every part of our body needs from our skin and hair to our reproductive system and our heart. Matter of fact, I actually read once that if you tend to have an excessive amount of earwax, that can also be a heads up that omega-3 is lacking. As far as how much is good for you, 1.1 grams daily is enough. And as far as foods that have omega-3 in them, those would be walnuts, spinach, salmon, chia seeds and eggs.

5. Weakness

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Magnesium is both a mineral as well as an electrolyte that helps to regulate muscle and nerve functions and keep your blood sugar in balance. Well, when you don't have enough magnesium in you, it can cause you to experience extreme amounts of fatigue and weakness. A part of the reason why is because magnesium is what helps to keep your potassium levels where they should be. So, when your potassium levels are low, your muscles will not perform with as much strength as they should. Somewhere around 315 mg each day is what your system requires. Foods that are loaded with magnesium include whole grains, pumpkin seeds, halibut, bananas and dark chocolate.

6. Hair Loss

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One of the main things that all of us need in order for our hair to flourish is zinc. It's a mineral that assists with hair tissue growth and repair, fights dandruff and, it also helps your scalp to produce the sebum that it needs for your hair follicles to remain healthy. That's why it makes a lot of sense that if you're low in zinc, you could possibly suffer from some hair loss or, the very least, hair breakage. What can keep your tresses in good condition is if you consume around 8 mg of zinc daily. Foods that are high in it include Greek yogurt, cashews, black beans, sesame seeds and kale.

7. Sleepiness

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OK, if you're out here getting less than six hours a night on a consistent basis, that's probably not an indication that you are lacking a nutrient; what that probably means is you are sleep deprived.

However, if it seems like no matter how much sleep you get at night and/or naps you take during the day, you are still sleepy as all get out, what that could be telling you is that you are low in Vitamin B12. I can personally attest to this because I was sleepy a lot (and I get no less than six hours a night and sometimes a nap) until I started taking a B12 supplement. When you're low in this vitamin, it can trigger sleepiness or even sleeplessness because it plays a significant role in maintaining your energy levels.

It's kinda crazy that a lot of us are Vitamin B12 deficient when most of us only need .002 mg a day of it. Anyway, foods that are a good source of this nutrient include liver, fortified cereals, shellfish, nutritional yeast and milk alternatives (like almond or oat milk).

8. Food Cravings

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Last fall, I wrote an article about signs that you've got a sugar addiction going on (you can check it out here). One indication is if you're constantly wanting to eat sweets all of the time. Well, along these same lines, if you're experiencing food cravings, that too could mean that you've not some nutrient deficiencies happening. Sweets typically mean that you can stand to have more magnesium or tryptophan. Fatty foods mean you need more calcium. Red meat, caffeine or the desire to chew ice means you're low in iron. Salt is oftentimes connected to dehydration or an electrolyte imbalance.

Wanting to eat bread all of the time could also mean that you could use a tryptophan boost (because you are looking for something to make you feel better and bread is a comfort food. Tryptophan helps to produce the feel-good hormone serotonin so that you don't want bread as much). Foods that are high in tryptophan include tuna, cheese, turkey, milk and apples.

While I certainly wasn't able to tackle all of the nutrient deficient-related issues that exist, take this as a bit of an intro cheat sheet. Again, if you are currently experiencing any of these issues, try getting more vitamins and minerals into your system. You might be surprised just how big of an impact...a little bit of tweaking can make.

Join our xoTribe, an exclusive community dedicated to YOU and your stories and all things xoNecole. Be a part of a growing community of women from all over the world who come together to uplift, inspire, and inform each other on all things related to the glow up.

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