5 Ways To Reach Multiple Orgasms Alone
Although having an orgasm is not the end all be all when it comes to great sex, it doesn't stop us from desiring to have them, whether alone or with a partner. One trip to the land of the Big O is awesome. Two.. three trips? That sounds too good to be true. But, orgasms of this kind are not just some mythical folklore. In fact, having multiple orgasms is very possible, and you can do it too.
Generally, multiple orgasms refer to a pleasure-seeker climaxing more than once in a single session. They are more common in vulva owners—15% of people with a vagina consistently experience multiple orgasms. Not everyone with a vulva experiences this, though, even though most have the capacity to do so. And how about penis-having folks? They could, but not so “ejaculatory.” More like dry orgasms from prostate or nipple stimulation.
After all, there are different types of orgasms up for grabs. Studies show that women are quicker to climax and much prefer to do it alone. Fourteen out of 15 vulva owners orgasm from masturbation before sex, according to the same report above. Plus, 25.2% of female pleasure-seekers who masturbated solo took 2-3 minutes to climax. It’s easy to see why. You know your body best. And without pressure to “perform” or “give” to a partner, you can focus on your pleasure and the sensations.
But that doesn’t mean you can’t orgasm during partnered play. Being with your partner could make things hotter, helping you orgasm more.
As a disclaimer, there is no step-by-step process as each body is different. Therefore, what feels good to one person might not feel good to you. So take these tips as a roadmap that you can adjust to your preferences.
5 Ways to Reach Multiple Orgasms Alone
1. Tone your pelvic floor muscle
Strong pelvic floor muscles = stronger orgasms.
You need to do a bit of groundwork for mind-blowing orgasms. It’s not just all about sex. Like most things in life, you need to sow and do some work before you can harvest rewards. In this case, your seeds are Kegel exercises.
How to do Kegel exercises:
- Find the most comfortable position for you. For example, you can sit comfortably or lie on your back.
- Engage your pelvic muscles by squeezing them 10 to 15 times: clench, then release.
- Hold the “clench” for 2 seconds before releasing it.
- If you’re unsure, the feeling is similar to holding your pee.
- Slowly increase the intensity or repetitions over time. Walk before you run.
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2. Relax and take a break in between
A refractory period is a time your body recovers after an orgasm. So there is really a “break time” because, uh, biology. That said, some vulva owners can orgasm one after the other with no refractory period. But for most of us, a little breather is necessary. Literally.
Don’t forget to breathe. Not breathing could impact the likelihood of climaxing for the second or third time. That little break should give your body enough time to reset while not stopping the arousal. You can stimulate other erogenous zones of your body, switch positions or maybe take a sip of a glass of water.
3. Try a different kind of stimulation
An orgasm could make your clitoris extra sensitive. During these times, some can’t bear their pleasure button to be touched. This is the perfect opportunity to experiment and switch stimulation. Play with your breasts, nipples, inner thighs, perineum, etc.—the sky's the limit, and it’s totally up to you.
Sensation play might also be something you’d want to explore to add spice to the session. Trying something new always makes solo sessions more fun. If your clitoris is not too sensitive and clitoral stimulation is what gets you off, you can apply different techniques as well.
Some examples are:
- Rubbing - Slide your fingers up and down or back and forth across the clit or clitoral hood.
- Tapping - Tap the clit and hood as fast (or slow) as you like.
- Circling - Draw circles around the clit and hood, including the labia along the way.
- Pinching - Pinch your clitoral hood in between your first two fingers and gently tug it up and down.
- Grinding - Grind your pelvis on something—your pillow, the sheets… and so on.
4. Concentrate on your breathing
Breathwork is key to multiple orgasms (and orgasms in general). It clears your mind so that you can stay in the moment. Your body is super connected to your mind. When you’re stressed, it could impact your ability to orgasm. So breathe slowly and deeply as you orgasm.
As your body nears climax and your arousal levels peak, your body will naturally incline to switch to short, huffy breaths. Fight that urge. Continue breathing slowly. Inhale through your nose and exhale through your mouth (like when meditating). This breathing technique is a great way to enhance the sensation.
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5. Bring out the toys
Adding a sex toy or two elevates the sexploration, making the entire experience more pleasurable for you during solo play (plus with your partner during sex). Almost half of the female participants from a study were revealed to be multi-orgasmic when they use sex toys to aid their sexual activities. So, why not?
These sex toys could help vulva owners achieve multiple orgasms:
- Doxy Die Cast - A wand massager that packs a lot of power and sends deep, rumbly vibrations to your clit and various erogenous zones.
- Lelo Soraya Wave - A top-shelf rabbit vibrator that provides both clitoral and internal stimulation. The insertable arm is powered by their patented WaveMotion tech that feels like you’re being expertly fingered… by a vibrator.
- Lovense Lush 3- A wearable egg vibrator perfect for public and long-distance partnered play. Of course, you can also enjoy it solo by connecting it to your smartphone to enjoy customizing vibration patterns, music syncing, and sound-activation functions.
- We-Vibe Tango X- One of the most powerful bullet vibrators with 7 rumbly vibration patterns and 8 adjustable speeds to give you a variety of sensations. Plus, it’s super portable and easy to hide.
- Satisfyer Pro 2- A budget-friendly clitoral stimulator that creates changes in air pressure to deliver pleasure. You get 11 levels of intensity, so you can find a configuration that gives you multiple orgasms without putting anything inside yourself. Plus, it works underwater.
Practice makes perfect
Rome wasn’t built in a day. So if you didn’t orgasm multiple times after your first few tries, don’t lose hope. It takes practice to be better at something—including multiple orgasms.
The more you train, the easier it will be for you to achieve your second, third, fourth (and so on) orgasm.
Orgasmed or did not, multiple or just one—NO PRESSURE. It’s not a requirement or an end goal.
If you enjoyed the journey, then it was a success. The best part? You can always keep trying.
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ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
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THE ITGIRL MEMO
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III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
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VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Playa del Carmen is the perfect vacation getaway for anyone who loves beautiful beaches, delicious food, and fun activities. Located on the Caribbean Sea side of Mexico, PDC is nestled right between the spring break hub Cancun and the growing hotspot Tulum. Oftentimes overlooked for some of the other popular cities, I found Playa del Carmen to have just as much in terms of vacation necessities, with a more local and authentic Mexican feel.
The Ultimate Guide to Playa del Carmen
Playa del Carmen is perfect for a solo traveler looking to spend a few days in paradise or the group chat that wants to hang on the beach all day and turn up at night. I found the area to have a little bit of everything for everyone, so here’s my guide on where to eat, stay, and play for the ultimate Playa del Carmen vacation.
Getting Around
The easiest way to get to Playa del Carmen is to fly into Cancun Airport and then make your way south. You can rent a car and drive the one hour down to PDC, take a taxi, or you can catch the ADO bus, which will cost you less than $40 roundtrip. Overall, Playa del Carmen is an easy and safe city to navigate. If you stay on or close to Quinta Avenida (5th Avenue), you’ll be within walking distance to a ton of stores, restaurants, and nightlife. Most taxi rides were between 100 and 150 pesos, which is less than $10 USD. Renting a car is also an option, but with things being very walkable and taxis being fairly inexpensive, it’s not a necessity. Another great way to get around is bikes, which you can rent to use throughout the city.
Stay
The Thompson Hotel is for the folks who know that where you stay on vacation absolutely does matter. This luxury property offers chic rooms and upscale suites, onsite restaurants, and a spa for those who are looking to pamper themselves. One of the standout features of this property is the rooftop infinity pool, which has 360-degree views of the city and is absolutely stunning. This is your type of hotel if you value immaculate views, delicious eats, prime location, and live DJs.
Grand Hyatt offers a prime beachfront location, while also being steps away from the mix on Quinta Avenida. I like that this property allows you to take in the calm beauty of the Caribbean, while also being in close proximity to the action within the city. You get both authentic Mexican food and some international fare at the resort restaurants, and this property also has an infinity pool that gives views of the ocean.
Airbnb
If you don’t have the funds to spend on a hotel stay, but still want clean and comfortable accommodations, do not overlook Airbnb. You can find super reasonably priced apartments close to the strip that will leave you in the heart of all the action. Many of these buildings feature 24-hour security, infinity pools, top-notch gyms, and rooftop bars. This is a great way to save some money, while not sacrificing the quality of the accommodations you like.
Eat
One of the best parts of being near the Caribbean Sea is having access to fresh seafood, and Ictio Fish House is the place to go for it. Located just a block off of the 5th Avenida strip, this small seafood restaurant is a quieter change compared to some of the busier and more touristy restaurants located directly on the strip. They have both indoor and outdoor seating available, but if you can snag a spot at the bar, the service is top notch and you can watch the bartender put together your craft cocktail.
Everything they serve is delicious and tastes authentic, so you really can't go wrong when ordering. But to start, the crispy jumbo shrimp and calamari are perfect for sharing. Other must-try dishes are the garlic butter catch of the day and the adobo-styled octopus.
El Fogon
Ask anyone for a recommendation for the best tacos in Playa del Carmen, and I promise you they will point you to El Fogon. You know a spot is good when it’s filled with just as many locals as tourists, and there’s a line outside at 1 p.m. This no-frills spot serves up authentic Mexican favorites like el pastor tacos, chicken quesadillas, guacamole, and margaritas. Every dish comes with the fixings and is not only super filling but extremely affordable. You can easily get a full meal and a drink for less than $20 USD. They have more than one location, so you can taste some of their delicious tacos no matter what part of PDC you stay in.
L&L by Lara&Luca
Before you hit the beach for day drinking, you need a hearty breakfast from L&L to start your day. This cute cafe is the smaller “sister” restaurant to Lara&Luca, another popular breakfast and lunch cafe in Playa. I liked that L&L is less busy and more laid back than the other location. They serve up typical breakfast and lunch items such as eggs, coffee, sandwiches, and French toast.
My favorite item was the ham and cheese croissant, which could be enjoyed on their outdoor seating or taken to enjoy on the go. They also have yummy pastries, but these sell out quickly, so be sure to go early.
El Pirata
If you’re a fried fish lover like me and appreciate sea-to-table service, El Pirata is the place to go. This restaurant is tucked away towards the end of the main 5th Avenida strip, so you might miss it if you aren’t looking for it. The restaurant serves up a plethora of tasty dishes like fresh ceviche, garlic shrimp, and shrimp empanadas, and has a full beverage menu for your libation needs. However, the fried fish is truly the star of the show.
When you order, they bring to your table a few of the fresh fish that were caught that day and allow you to choose which lucky one you want them to fry for you. And let me tell you, picking your own fried fish just hits different! It was one of my favorite meals in Playa del Carmen.
Play
Food Tour
There are so many delicious places to eat in Playa del Carmen so taking a local food tour is the best way to try a little bit of everything. I love taking food tours when I travel because not only is it a great way to try a range of different local dishes, but the tour guides usually give you a history lesson during the tour where you learn more about the history of certain dishes and the country as a whole. In Playa Del Carmen, I took a local food tour with GetYourGuide, where we stopped at several different locations for tacos, fresh fruit juice, tamales, and more.
I value it when there’s a local leading the tour because it’s a way to support the locals and also learn things that only people native to the location would know. While we walked, the guide shared a lot of insight about Mexico and Playa del Carmen, while giving recommendations for places to eat during our trip.
Cenotes
Cenotes are natural sinkholes or underground caverns that have pools of water in which you can explore, dive, and swim in. You will find cenotes all around Mexico, but there are several in the Playa del Carmen region. Cenotes vary in size and also the depth of water, so even if you don’t know how to swim, you can find a cenote to explore at your own comfort level. Two beautiful cenotes you can explore near PDC are Cenote Azul and Cenote Dos Ojos.
Cenote Azul is perfect for snorkeling because of the crystal clear waters that allow you to see the colorful fish and plant life underneath. Cenote Dos Ojos is perfect for explorers due to the mesmerizing underground caverns and rock formations throughout. You can take a trip to the cenotes on your own or book a tour that may take you to several different cenotes.
Beaches
Playa Del Carmen has some of the most beautiful beaches in the Caribbean, so beach hopping is a must while vacationing in the area. Whether you want a chill, relaxing beach day or you are thinking of jet skiing on the blue waters, there is a beach for you. There are several beaches along the coast of Playa del Carmen, some that are within walking distance of most hotels, and others that you may need to travel to get to but are totally worth it.
Playa Mamitas is one of the most popular beaches in PDC due to its location near the heart of the city, and also because of the crystal clear waters and white sand. Playa Mamitas is also a great spot for entertainment and the occasional beach party for the folks wanting to turn up. Playacar Beach is another great option that is located in the upscale Playacar neighborhood, south of downtown Playa del Carmen.
It is known for its pristine beauty and laid-back atmosphere, making it a popular destination for travelers seeking relaxation and seclusion. Other beaches to consider are Punta Esmeralda and Xpu-ha Beach, so you’ll have an option for every day of your trip, depending on your mood.
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