In About Face, xoNecole gets the 411 on IGers who give us #skincaregoals on the daily. Here they break down their beauty routines on the inside and out, as well as the highly coveted products that grace their shelves and their skin.
Kaylen Zahara, better known on Instagram as @AmazedByKay, is an entrepreneur and digital content creator taking the beauty and wellness industry by storm. "My favorite part about this career field is the opportunities it provides and the realization that my entire lifestyle is sponsored," she tells xoNecole. "I get paid just to be myself and use products and services that I would if I weren't in this career field."
She reminisces back to when her relationship with beauty and skincare began to strengthen five years ago. "I would have to say 21 is when the shift happened," Kaylen tells xoNecole. "It was an older gentleman who taught me about the importance of taking care of my skin at a young age so that I would age beautifully. After that conversation I never looked back and began manifesting a lot of skincare beauty deals."
Courtesy of Kaylen Zahara
Whether it's through her quick tips for hair and beauty on YouTube, giving advice on personal branding on IGTV, or speaking on panels for marketing and entrepreneurship, the 26-year-old Los Angeles resident proves that she's a businesswoman and budding beauty guru to be on the lookout for in 2020. With over 115,000 Instagram followers and counting, she has proved to her growing audience that she can be the new go-to girl for fashion, beauty and reliable lifestyle content.
In this installment of xoNecole's "About Face", Kaylen talks about keeping her skincare routine simple, the personal benefits of cannabis and her spiritual journey to appreciating beauty and skincare on a deeper level.
My morning routine consists of...
Courtesy of Kaylen Zahara
"A typical morning for myself is waking up, giving gratitude, meditating, checking emails and social media, along with with jamming to my favorites like Jhene [Aiko], Kehlani, Alina Baraz, Masego, Ari Lennox to set a vibe and intention for my day to be joyous and soulful!"
My AM skincare routine looks like...
"My skincare routine is extremely easy and quick. Day and night stays the same. I believe in less is more and just focusing on one thing at a time per season."
My evening routine consists of…
"My evenings are typically accompanied with music, vision board sessions, sound baths, binaural beats, YouTube, and maybe even cannabis."
My PM skincare routine looks like...
"I keep my routine the same. Less is more for me, no need to complicate things. Occasionally, I will use a sheet mask to assist with removing under eye bags if I haven't been getting adequate sleep. Sheet masks by The Creme Shop are super affordable and they cure any under eye bags overnight. [They] keep them away if you use them each day!"
How my skincare changes for the seasons…
"My fall and winter skincare is ALL about moisture and hydration. Spring and summer is where I focus on cleansing and preventing acne. In the fall and winter, I focus on hydration. I start with washing my face with warm water and First Aid Beauty face cleanser. I like to dry my face with a clean towel after and I apply my favorite choice of gel cream, which is typically Erno Laszlo Hydra Therapy Gel Cream - this cream is so hydrating! I then follow up with eye cream by Dermalogica [because] bags under the eye can happen any time of the year.
"If we are in the spring and summer season, I would apply Dermalogica's Age Brightening Acne Serum after washing my face and before applying a gel cream for hydration."
My go-to makeup look consists of…
Courtesy of Kaylen Zahara
"My go-to makeup look is always the 'no makeup' makeup look. I like to start off with a primer that is hydrating and has a shimmer to it. I find that it allows the light foundation on top of it to shine like a diamond. I touch up with shimmer-like bronzer around the perimeters of my face and add concealer to my eye and forehead area to make sure my makeup doesn't look flat or one dimensional."
How I approach beauty from the inside-out…
"Honestly? Being a woman that partakes in consuming cannabis has allowed me to awaken to my authentic self and led me onto the path of becoming my highest version. Cannabis is such a healer, a mentor, a soulmate, and more for me and so many others."
What self-care looks like to me…
"My self-care must-haves are sheet masks, a gel cream for hydration, cannabis, crystals, herbs, tea, sage, binaural beats and of course my devices."
My earliest beauty memory…
Courtesy of Kaylen Zahara
"My earliest beauty memory that really stuck with me and made me feel like a woman was when my mom finally allowed me to get acrylic nails when I was 13. That trip to the nail salon was extremely impactful and ignited my love for nail care and acrylics!"
How my view on beauty and skincare has evolved…
"I used to think that beauty and skincare was just at a surface level; vanity and external. I learned with my growing spiritual journey, that it's much more deeper than that. It is internal. It's energetic. What we put in our bodies, how we think, what we feel, and what we choose to believe has a major direct impact on our skin and its health just as it does everything else. Present day, I have adopted a lifestyle that supports healthy skin that consists of herbs, meditation, adequate alkaline and kangen water intake, and care of all other organs."
For more of Kaylen, follow her on Instagram.
Shop Kaylen's Beauty Staples:
*Some links are affiliate links. If you purchase an item from an affiliate link, xoNecole might earn a small commission.
Featured image courtesy of Kaylen Zahara
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When I asked a few women I know if they ever tried that before, I was surprised to discover that not only had they, but many didn’t treat it as some random social media fad — they actually still do it to this day. Partly, because it’s fun to them and partly because their partner(s) seem to go crazy for it.
Listen, any time something sexual works like a charm, I’m going to shout it out — (late) trend or not. And so, if you’ve never heard of the whole coconut thing, you tried it and forgot all about it, or you just want to try something new/different/else tonight — here’s a reminder, in article form, that coconut-ting is still alive and well, y’all. And the men are all about it!
But First, The Grapefruit Technique
Video Credit: Myem/YouTube (Funny part starts at 2:40)
If this woman is not familiar to you on sight, you ain’t a real one. LOL. Although I know that a lot of people think that the concept of grapefruiting came from the movie Girls Trip (you can see the clip from the film here) that absolutely is not the case. Auntie Angel (whose real name is reportedly Denise Walker) is the creator of the Grapefruit Technique and although I thought that this video came out way earlier, apparently it made its way onto the YouTube streets sometime back in 2014.
If for some reason, you’re not familiar with grapefruiting on any level, I will tell you right now that I had to download this video because it is absolutely NSFW — so you should probably watch it on your lunch break (on your phone with the volume as low as possible) or at home…because chile, the sound effects? Whew, the sound effects. LOL. However, when I sat down to pen this piece, I thought it was hilarious that this video is what immediately came to mind because it seems like, when it comes to “blow his mind sex hacks,” fruit is constantly on the menu.
When it comes to oral sex, it’s grapefruit.
When it comes to ride ‘em cowgirl, it’s a coconut.
What Is the “Coconut” Sex Trend?
@windy_moraba #duet with @mysteri0us.gir1 spell coconut with your waist 😂😂😂
Okay, so what in the world does a coconut have to do with intercourse? Well, for starters, if you and your partner are looking for an all-natural lubricant, coconut oil works well. HOWEVER, do keep in mind that the disclaimer on this is you shouldn’t use it if condoms are in the mix because they can actually cause rubbers to be less effective (silicone lube is a solid bet for condoms, by the way).
There is another way that coconuts are kinda-sorta incorporated when it comes to making sex more pleasurable — and it actually became pretty popular right after COVID lockdown (2021): spelling C-O-C-O-N-U-T with your hips while you’re on top of your partner.
It’s wild how I forgot all about this until a client of mine was telling me how much her husband liked her on top while it wasn’t her favorite thing to do because it felt awkward to her. When I said, “Have you ever heard of spelling ‘coconut’ with your hips before?” — at first, she looked at me like I was crazy and then she busted out laughing: “Girl, no” was her reply.
Hmph. Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it because, as wild as it might sound on the surface, the word isn’t the point so much as the movements that come with spelling it out are.
When you’re moving your pelvis around to make a “c,” “o” or U-turn, not only does it intensify the level of sensation that both you and your partner feel during intercourse, it can also increase the level of blood circulation to both of your genitalia which can make your orgasms more satisfying too.
At the end of the day, spelling “coconut” is simply reminding you that there are more options to riding than simply sitting there while your partner pumps for all he’s worth or you humping up and down like you’re on a pogo stick.
Spelling “coconut” is an easy hack to bring some variety into cowgirling. However…
Honestly, the “Fruit” Isn’t the Point. THIS IS.
GiphyFrom grapefruiting and spelling “coconut” to reading articles that I’ve penned for the platform like “How To Improve The Taste Of Sperm” — fruit and sex are always going to be a winning combination, one way or another. However, the main point of this article isn’t about making sure that you are a master speller so much as providing you with tips that will make the cowgirl position something that you are confident about and you find a ton of fulfillment in doing.
You can make both of these things happen by incorporating the following things:
Stretch beforehand. A charley horse during sex is the worst thing ever — and chile, don’t let it be right before you’re about to climax. SMDH. Yeah, if you want to feel more comfortable when you’re on top, make sure that you stretch beforehand and that you are well-hydrated. That will reduce the chances of experiencing a totally-out-of-nowhere muscle spasm — whether you decide to “spell” during sex or…not.
Bring pillows into the mix. Sometimes riding is a challenge because your partner feels farther away from your body than you would like. Putting a pillow underneath him can help to elevate his pelvis, so that you don’t feel like you’re stretching and straining. Speaking of pillows, a longer one can really come in handy because it can give your knees some additional support as well.
Also, ask him to put his knees up. Speaking of making the “grind” easier for you, ask your partner to put his knees up. That way, your back can recline on his legs as you’re moving your hips around. You’d be amazed how much this one hack can do for you. Straight up.
Add lube. When you get a chance, check out “The Wetter, The Better: 10 Creative Ways To Use Lubricant” and you will automatically see why bringing lubrication into a cowgirl session is an absolute must. It reduces friction. It makes your movements glide with ease. And it’s just more fun. Promise you that.
Lean in. If your partner happens to be on the larger side of life, one way that you can control his depth is by leaning forward into him. That way, your hips can better control how much or little he is inside of you, so that you can get into a position that gives you the sensation that you are looking for.
Get him to multitask. Again, whether you are spelling “coconut” or not and whether you are riding cowgirl or reverse cowgirl — something that is awesome about being on top is it frees your partner’s hands to do, umm, other things. And since it is so much easier to have an orgasm while your clitoris is being stimulated, get your partner to put some of the lube that we discussed earlier on his fingertips, so that he can gently rub on your clitoris while you are riding him. It doesn’t get much better than that!
Don’t wanna spell? Hula Hoop then. What if you try the whole coconut thing and it’s not a favorite for you (or him)? No problem — when’s the last time that you hula hooped? Pretend that you have one of those around your hips and move around that way. I’d be shocked if you ended up feeling “meh” about that option.
5 Guys Tell Me What They Love When Their Partner Is on Top
GiphyA part of the reason why I am “team cowgirl” is because it provides a lot of benefits to the woman: she has more control, it tends to be more comfortable for her, it’s a great position for a quickie and the orgasms tend to be that much more — wonderful. However, as I was thinking about spelling coconut, in general, I couldn’t help but wonder what guys thought about it and the cowgirl position overall.
If you’re curious, here’s what five of ‘em said.
1. Braxford. Engaged. 35. “Y’all be spelling up there? Who knew? My favorite thing about when my fiancée is on top is what I think every man likes: the view. It’s a chance to see her entire body and experience it at the same time. Not even doggy style accomplishes that. Damn, where’s my lady at?”
2. Denez. Single. 42. “Do you know how many ‘spots’ you have access to when y’all are on top? Breasts are in my mouth. Hickeys are on her neck. Prop my head up on a pillow and her tummy is getting licked. When a woman is riding you, it’s sensory overload! It’s crazy how each one looks amazing in that position too.”
3. Omar. In a Serious Relationship. 29. “[He said her name yet I’m not going to share it] isn’t a very vocal lover. Her body and technique are insane, so even though I love dirty talk, I’ve learned to compromise — except when she’s on top. She’s not saying much but those moans? And yeah, we tried the coconut thing. ‘Cs’ and ‘Os,’ hell yeah. ‘Ns’ and “Ts’? Nah.”
4. Nolen. Single. 45. “45 isn’t old but it’s old enough for your back to show out on you when you least expect it. My experience has been that women don’t want a lot of thrusting when they are on top, so it’s like having some of the best sex without having to do much at all. Well, aside from trying not to bust too quickly. I take that back: riding is easy on the body; it’s work on the brain.”
5. Ivan. Married. 37. “I like the spelling sh-t because it switches things up. We make a game out of it by her picking a word and spelling out while I try and guess what it is. We also try to see how many words that we can get to before one of us cums. 12 words is pushing it unless it’s like ‘dog’ or ‘cat’ or something. I’ve guessed ‘coconut’ a few times and I get what the excitement is all about. Spelling bee sex: try it.”
Yep. I concur.
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Featured image by Giphy