There are moments in life when it feels like things just won’t seem to look up. Disappointment strikes, rejections come from all directions, and you couldn’t find the “bright side” of your situation if you held a flashlight up to it.
This mental pit, known as a ‘downward spiral,’ is an occurrence that comes from life’s circumstances but can be difficult to spot until you’re deep within it. But in order for you to shift the direction of your spiral from a downward decline to an upward trajectory, you must first be able to detect the signs of when your mental health is headed in the wrong direction.
According to Dr. Jonathan Leary, founder of the Remedy Place — a social wellness club, downward spirals can manifest in many different ways, so it's important to be aware of the signs in order to prevent further decline. “A lack of social support and connection can negatively affect mental and emotional health,” he explains. “Pay attention to signs of withdrawal from social activities, decreased interest in hobbies or relationships, or a sudden change in social patterns.”
In addition to involuntary solitude, Dr. Leary shares that mental and physical health issues such as depression, anxiety, excessive stress, chronic illnesses, or conditions that are not properly treated can lead to a decline in one’s well-being. “These signs may include changes in mood, decreased motivation or energy, difficulty concentrating, or increased irritability.”
Being able to identify the signs of our rough patch is the first step to making a pivot out of these dark moments, and once the clouds clear, it might just be time for you to spark your upward spiral.
WHAT IS AN UPWARD SPIRAL?
“An upward spiral refers to a cycle of positive changes and experiences that contribute to an individual's overall well-being and happiness,” he explains. “It involves a series of interconnected factors that build upon each other, creating an upward trajectory in various aspects of life.”
Creating these cycles of positive momentum and growth can positively impact one's well-being, confidence, and overall outlook on life. That’s why Dr. Leary says that creating your own positive feedback loop can be the fuel you need to ignite tangible change in your life. “The positive changes in one area of life can spill over into other areas — for example, improved physical health can boost self-esteem and motivation, leading to increased engagement in social activities and personal growth,” he says.
Finding your spark can start with you setting small, measurable goals to reach, pursuing personal interests, and continuously learning and growing can foster a sense of purpose and accomplishment. “As individuals make progress toward their goals, they experience a sense of self-efficacy, confidence, and satisfaction, leading to increased overall well-being,” Dr. Leary explains.
Small, positive actions can lead to bigger changes, so implementing new habits and mindsets into your daily life can not only keep the flame of your upward spiral burning bright but also lead to bigger changes in wellness.
“Cultivating a daily gratitude practice by acknowledging and appreciating the positive aspects of life can shift focus toward the good and enhance optimism,” Dr. Leary shares. “Breaking down large goals into smaller, achievable micro-goals can provide a sense of progress and motivation, so celebrate small victories along the way, as they build confidence and momentum toward larger goals.”
He continues, “Remember, the key is to start small and gradually build upon these habits and mindsets over time. By consistently incorporating these positive actions into your daily life, you can create a ripple effect that leads to bigger changes, greater well-being, and an upward spiral in multiple areas of your life.”
HOW TO PRACTICE SELF-COMPASSION:
At times, hitting a downward spiral can seem unavoidable, but there are ways to prevent things from going bad to worse, and it’s all about being proactive about noticing the first sign of distress and regularly checking in with yourself to honestly assess your physical and mental well-being. If you are on the journey toward an upward spiral, remember that practicing self-compassion can be an invaluable resource along the way.
So if you’re looking for a place to start, consider the following strategies from Dr. Leary in the slideshow below:
3. Embrace Self-Acceptance:
Westend61/Getty Images
“Accept yourself as you are, including your strengths and weaknesses. Embrace your humanity and recognize that it's okay to have limitations and make mistakes. Focus on self-acceptance rather than self-judgment.”
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by RyanJLane/Getty Images
Aley Arion is a writer and digital storyteller from the South, currently living in sunny Los Angeles. Her site, yagirlaley.com, serves as a digital diary to document personal essays, cultural commentary, and her insights into the Black Millennial experience. Follow her at @yagirlaley on all platforms!
The Fall Staples It Girls From Coast To Coast Are Already Wearing
When it comes to trends, It girls lead, they don’t follow. Keeping one finger on the pulse of fashion and the other on their instincts, it’s their innate ability to dress to the beat of their own heart that makes them stand out amongst everyone else around them.
These women are ahead of their time, forecasting what will eventually be adopted by the masses often years in advance. In most cases, buying into trending items is just a by-product of their love of fashion, however, it's never the key ingredient of a memorable outfit.
As we transition from summer to fall, there’s no need to spend too many coins curating a brand new seasonal wardrobe, especially in this economy. Instead of shopping targeted ads, we interviewed fashion-forward influencers to spark our imagination and gather insight on what they’re already wearing leading into the upcoming season. Keep scrolling to get the scoop on essential items these fashion-forward women are looking forward to wearing this fall.
Helecia Williams, Houston
Comfort
Helecia’s style in three words: “Structured, bold, and explorative.”
Helecia’s outfit inspiration: “I am most interested in comfort as a trend. I am truly enjoying the mix of flats with elevated outfits and the incorporation of street-style elements into the looks. I have seen so much juxtaposition that makes the outfits interesting and intriguing. I love the pairing of fitted caps with [suits] and ballet flats. That mashup is impeccable, and we saw some of that peeking through last fall, and now it's taken on a life of its own.
"As a sneaker lover and comfort sneakers, bringing back flats is just a reimagination of past trends with a fresh twist.”
What color(s) is on Helecia’s fall mood board: “Hands down, red! It's such a bold and bossy color. Now, we see it becoming much more accessible in fashion and realize how easy it is to style and incorporate into a look for that extra pop. It also pairs well with so many other shades and tones. Some of my favorite combos are red and burgundy, red and yellow, and red and brown. Even if you aren't fully convinced that it's the color of the season and still have reservations about it, you can go classic and incorporate it in an accessory or makeup like a red lip.”
Are you bringing anything back from your 2023 fall wardrobe? “I will be returning and recycling all of my 2023 fall wardrobe and just styling it differently or giving it new life. Despite my love for trends, I've curated a wardrobe that I love so I will mix the old in with the new. And not to toot my own horn but a lot of my fashion moments are ahead of the times and still very relevant for this upcoming fall. Expect to see tons of texture, juxtaposition, unexpected color combos, and street style.”
How Helecia is accessorizing this season: “I hate to admit it, but the one trend that has me in a chokehold this fall is bold jewelry, particularly in gold. I've realized that accessories can do wonders, and the Schiaparelli era has me shook. I am a ‘Stan’ of Shop Khoi, a Black-owned jewelry brand that creates some of the most amazing, high-quality fashion jewelry. It just sets off any outfit no matter how simple it may be and easily becomes a conversation piece.”
Courtney Blackwell, New York City
Courtney’s style in three words: “Vintage, oversize, and sexy.”
Courtney’s most anticipated fall fashion items: “The fashion item I am anticipating wearing is vintage leather in all colors!”
Courtney's color picks for fall: “Cherry reds, forest greens, and different shades of gray.”
The trend that has Courtney in a chokehold this season: “Skirts! I’ve never been a skirt girly, well mini skirts girly, but I think I’m going to step it up with the minis this fall.”
Shaniqua Jordan, New York City
Timeless
Shaniqua’s personal styling tip for fall: “I hate to admit it, but the one trend that has me in a chokehold this fall is any oversized outerwear piece, especially oversized blazers. And as basic as it may sound, I can't get enough of them. They instantly elevate any look, and they're so versatile, whether I'm going for a polished vibe or something more casual. Plus, they are perfect for layering as the weather cools down.
"I know most people wouldn't typically opt for suede, but if you've been following my style, you know I'm all about my outerwear. I love adding texture to my looks, even if it's subtle, and a good suede jacket does that for me. The soft texture and rich hues of suede add that cherry on top for any fall look. Whether I'm rocking a bomber style in a jewel tone or a tailored trench in a neutral shade, a suede jacket is one piece I'm looking forward to wearing to elevate my fall wardrobe.”
These colors are all over Shaniqua’s fall mood board: “The colors on my fall mood board are rich earth tones like deep browns and olive greens paired with classic neutrals like camel and cream. I'd like to throw in a pop of butter yellow. I know it might seem more spring-like, but I love how it pairs with deep browns, oxblood, and even grays. It's the perfect way to brighten up those cozy, moody fall vibes. I'm also loving pops of bold jewel tones like emerald and burgundy to add a bit of luxe to the season. These shades give that cozy yet elevated feel I'm always aiming for in my fall wardrobe.”
Shaniqua describes her fall wardrobe in three words: “If I describe my fall wardrobe in three words, they would be chic, layered, and timeless. I love combining unique pieces with a classic touch, creating looks that stand out without trying too hard. It's all about finding that perfect balance between staying true to timeless fashion and adding my own signature flair.”
Are you bringing anything back from your 2023 fall wardrobe? "I am definitely an outfit repeater, so not only will I bring back pieces from my 2023 fall wardrobe, but I also have so many oldies but goodies that I’ll be incorporating into my fall 2024 looks. I think that's what really helps convey my personal style; buying pieces I genuinely love and being able to work them into my style season after season. It's all about longevity and staying true to what I love."
Alasia Allen, Los Angeles
Provocative
Alasia describes her style in three words: “Opulent, sleek, provocative.”
The fashion item Alasia anticipates wearing the most this fall: “I’m really into gloves this season. Whether it’s biker style or long, sleek, leather gloves, they add an interesting take to a fall look.”
The fall colors catching Alasia’s eye: “I’m loving navy or a super deep purple this season so I’ll be adding those into my wardrobe. They’re both so sophisticated and a good alternative to black.”
The fall staple Alaisa plans to bring back from her 2023 wardrobe: “Every year, I wear a shearling coat. It’s timeless, it’s warm, it’s my thing. There’s something very elevating about shearlings that have drawn to me year after year, and that’s what makes them my favorite style of outwear.”
The accessory that has Alasia in a chokehold this season: “Boots. I love a good boot as my go-to accessory for the fall/winter season. My favorites are boots that have a little flair to them and an interesting shape.”
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image courtesy
Serena Williams’ Wyn Beauty Wants To Revolutionize Your Active Beauty Routine
Serena Williams has always embodied what it means to be a champion. As the investor also steps into her entrepreneurial era, she's showing us that winning isn’t just reserved for the court. With her latest venture, Wyn Beauty, Serena is serving us the ultimate beauty game-changer: 'makeup you can move in.'
In a sea of celebrity beauty brands, Wyn Beauty stands out with its 'Wyn Chartreuse' touches (a color that's signature to the brand and significant to Serena) and its commitment to high-performing formulas with staying power for 'active beauty.' Just ask the founder. "I created Wyn Beauty to be active beauty. Active doesn’t always mean sport. I think moms are very active, and everyday women are very active," Serena recently shared with Glossy.
Wyn Beauty made its debut in April, and to celebrate her iconic U.S. Open win 25 years ago, Serena has recently introduced two new collections: the Starting Line lip liners and Acceptance Speech lip glosses. Keep scrolling for more about the newly dropped products and some faves from the Wyn Beauty line.
Wyn Beauty Starting Line Peptide-Infused Lip Liner
Starting Line in "Excellence"
Level up your lip game with Wyn Beauty's latest line of liners. Introducing the Starting Line Peptide-Infused Lip Liner that is vying for a spot in your makeup rotation. Pigmented, soft, and creamy, these liners add depth and water-resistant color to any pout. It glides on smoothly, and the color lasts on your lips for up to 17 hours.
Wyn Beauty Acceptance Speech Shimmering Hydrating Lip Gloss
Acceptance Speech in "Trophy"
Feels like a non-sticky lip balm, and shimmers like a gloss, Acceptance Speech is serving high shine and long-lasting hydration with each application. Available in eight gorgeous shades, Wyn Beauty's new Acceptance Speech lip gloss delivers vibrant color while keeping your lips soft and nourished.
Wyn Beauty Featuring You Hydrating Skin Enhancing Tint SPF 30
Featuring You Hydrating Skin Enhancing Tint
A lightweight tinted moisturizer, the Featuring You Hydrating Skin Enhancing Tint goes on cool and enhances your skin by providing buildable coverage with SPF 30 and a hydrating effect that lasts days afterward. As one PopSugar editor puts about the product, "If you want an easy, wearable tint, you can't go wrong." Copping this is a no-brainer.
Wyn Beauty Nothing to See Soft Matte Creamy Concealer
Nothing to See Soft Matte Creamy Concealer in "Rise"
Nothing to See Soft Matte Creamy Concealer is a medium-coverage buildable creamy concealer that gives a soft-matte finish. The long wear formula lasts all day while conditioning the skin with hydration that lasts up to 72 hours. Available in 20 shades, it's the perfect complement to the brand's skin tint.
Wyn Beauty Word of Mouth Max Comfort Matte Lipstick
Word of Mouth in "Dare"
Super-pigmented color, matte finish, and 24-hour hydration? Say less. Word of Mouth Max Comfort is a matte lippie that wears all day without drying your lips. Its conditioning formula allows the lipstick to glide on smoothly and stays on all day without smudging or smearing.
Wyn Beauty Big Vision Lengthening & Defining Tubing Mascara
Big Vision Lengthening & Defining Tubing Mascara in "Focus Black"
Smudge-resistant and flake-resistant are just two of the winning attributes of this Wyn Beauty product. The Big Vision Lengthening & Defining Tubing Mascara is an award-winning mascara with tubing technology that packs maximum definition and maximum hydration for big lash energy.
Wyn Beauty Glideline Waterproof Liquid Eyeliner
Glideline Waterproof Liquid Eyeliner in "Focus Black"
With a felt tip applicator built for ultra-precision and a formula that is "24-hour, waterproof, smudge-proof, and sweat-resistant wear," Glideline is that girl. And there's no question about it. In fact, one reviewer states about the product, "The ink is really deep and bold. The tip is precise and perfect."
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Marc Piasecki/WireImage