5 Signs It's Time For A Job Title—Not A Career—Change
Oftentimes, when we're in a rut, unhappy at work, or just overall dissatisfied in our professional lives, there are triggers. And many of us have very catastrophic thoughts in response to those triggers, from, "Every day is terrible at work, but I can't do any better than this," to "I'm totally stuck and need the money to pay my bills."
You might be two seconds from hitting send on that resignation notice you've had in your email drafts for months, ready to risk it all and just give up.
When you're feeling utterly annoyed, frustrated, disinterested, or just bored at work, here's a refreshing thing to consider: Your feelings might not have anything to do with your overall career choice. It's the actual job, sis. Here are a few signs you might need to rethink the job versus changing your career as a whole:
1. Your relationship with your direct manager or supervisor is simply not a good fit.
If you've tried all you can to perform, show up to work on time, and excel, it might not be the industry you're in but the manager you're directly reporting to. And sometimes, just like in love, a work relationship just might not be a good fit. While many aspects of our jobs are personal to us, leadership compatibility can have nothing to do with you or your manager and more to do with the fact that their style or way of doing things is just not conducive to you thriving in that position.
If one-on-ones and mediation meetings with your manager aren't helpful, but you love the company and the industry you're in, the best thing you can do in this case is ask for a transfer to another branch or location of your current company.
2. You're bored with the duties required for your job.
I experienced this as a copy editor. My mentor had advised that pursuing such a position was a great way to get my foot in the door, especially at a major global publication, and he was right. However, after a few years, my ambitions grew, and the role itself just became monotonous and isolating. I still loved journalism, the company I worked for, and the people I worked with, but I just couldn't shake those Sunday Scaries that would overcome my thoughts week after week.
I decided to volunteer to edit digital content at a time when digital media wasn't financially lucrative for publishers. Print content was king. It was experimental for many major publishers because they had not yet learned how to disrupt and monetize content on the Internet. It was the best decision of my life because I was a team member at the company who could lead once digital media really took off.
You don't have to necessarily quit altogether because you no longer have a passion for your job duties. Talk with your manager or HR department and apply or request to be placed in a different department that will really challenge you as a professional. If you can, volunteer for projects that allow you to work in other aspects of a business or for corporate volunteer opportunities that will put you on teams with upper-level executives.
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3. You've been in the same title position for more than three years.
Sis, advocate for yourself and ask for that promotion, especially if you're a mid-level professional managing anything (i.e., content, processes, people, or budgets). If there are clear success metrics attached to your contributions to the company, it's time to move on up. And be sure to ask for the salary that goes along with it. Y'all know these companies try to play us with title promotions, but no money behind the added duties and responsibilities.
I made the mistake of making lateral moves within a company for five years, so it didn't seem urgent for the company to promote me. It was as if I was content (and they certainly were content paying me the same for more and more work.) It wasn't until I requested a promotion that they knew my contributions and time had outgrown the title, and my experience reflected that of an associate, and I was indeed promoted with a pay raise.
If a promotion at your current company is just not an option, apply for higher positions at another company. Be sure you have the career receipts, reputation, and experience to do so, but don't shy away from a more advanced title within your industry. Again, you don't want to be stagnant in your career journey, so it's time to step it up and challenge yourself with a higher title and pay.
4. You have a new interest in a different aspect of your industry.
Say you started in children's education but now feel a pull to take your teaching skills to empower adults. Well, go for it. That's not necessarily a total change in career but a shift in the people you serve. If you're in fashion, focused solely on women, why not venture out into men's, children's, or another niche? If you're in tech marketing but find yourself to be a savvy inventor, project manager, legal expert, or process visionary, shift to jobs that light a fire under those skills.
Just because you have one job today that you love doesn't mean you can't shift to a different job within your industry (or even at the same company) that you love and are just as good at.
Also, growth in your career oftentimes means you lose interest in things you used to be super-excited about, and that's totally okay. Shift gears to apply a different skill set within the industry and keep those relationships you had before. You might even walk into a lucrative side hustle or business of your own.
5. Your mental and physical health is at stake.
I knew a woman who worked in emergency care in a role that really became draining for both her mental and physical health. Instead of quitting the medical industry altogether, she went into advocacy and administration, where she could work from an office, handle the more strategic parts of the job, and interact with people who made decisions on processes and protocols.
Sometimes, back-breaking, tedious, or high-stress jobs just have an expiration date, so if you can no longer take it, apply for a different role that fits your current mental and physical wellness goals. Some of us are called to very stressful, physically taxing jobs, and we love it, while others are meant to transition into other roles, and there's nothing wrong with that. You don't have to tough it out or feel guilty for wanting a role that affords you more ease. Make the best decision for you while contributing to the greater good in your industry.
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- Am I Outgrowing My Job? Signs It May Be Time To Move On Before It’s Too Late ›
- Unhappy At Work? 6 Signs It’s the Job, Not You, Sis ›
- 6 Signs It's Time For A Major Life Change ›
This Black Woman-Owned Creative Agency Shows Us The Art Of Rebranding
Rebranding is an intricate process and very important to the success of businesses that want to change. However, before a business owner makes this decision, they should determine whether it's a rebrand or an evolution.
That's where people like Lola Adewuya come in. Lola is the founder and CEO of The Brand Doula, a brand development studio with a multidisciplinary approach to branding, social media, marketing, and design.
While an evolution is a natural progression that happens as businesses grow, a rebrand is a total change. Lola tells xoNecole, "A total rebrand is necessary when a business’s current reputation/what it’s known for is at odds with the business’s vision or direction.
"For example, if you’ve fundamentally changed what your product is and does, it’s likely that your brand is out of alignment with the business. Or, if you find your company is developing a reputation that doesn’t serve it, it might be time to pump the brakes and figure out what needs to change.
She continues, "Sometimes you’ll see companies (especially startups) announce a name change that comes with updated messaging, visuals, etc. That usually means their vision has changed or expanded, and their previous branding was too narrow/couldn’t encompass everything they planned to do."
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The Brand Doula was born in 2019, and its focus is on putting "the experiences, goals, and needs of women of color founders first," as well as brands with "culture-shifting missions."
According to Lola, culture-shifting is "the act of influencing dominant behavior, beliefs, or experiences in a community or group (ideally, for the better)."
"At The Brand Doula, we work with companies and leaders that set out to challenge the status quo in their industries and communities. They’re here to make an impact that sends ripples across the market," she says.
"We help the problem solvers of the world — the ones who aren't satisfied with 'this is how it's always been' and instead ask 'how could this be better?' Our clients build for impact, reimagining tools, systems, and ways of living to move cultures forward."
The Brand Doula has worked with many brands, including Too Collective, to assist with their collaboration with Selena Gomez's Rare Beauty and Balanced Black Girl for a "refresh," aka rebrand. For businesses looking to rebrand, Lola shares four essential steps.
1. Do an audit of your current brand experience — what’s still relevant and what needs to change? Reflect on why you’re doing the rebrand in the first place and what success would look like after relaunching.
2. Tackle the overall strategy first — before you start redesigning logos and websites, align on a new vision for your brand. How do you want your company to be positioned moving forward? Has your audience changed at all? Will your company have a fresh personality and voice?
3. Bring your audience along the journey — there’s no need to move in secret. Inviting your current audience into the journey can actually help them feel more connected to and invested in your story, enough to stick around as changes are being made.
4. Keep business moving — one of my biggest pet peeves is when companies take down their websites as soon as they have the idea to rebrand, then have a Coming Soon page up for months! You lose a lot of momentum and interest by doing that. If you’re still in business and generating income, continue to operate while you work on your rebrand behind the scenes. You don’t want to cut existing customers off out of the blue, and you also don’t want so much downtime that folks forget your business exists or start looking for other solutions.
While determining whether the rebrand was successful may take a few months, Lola says a clear sign that it is unsuccessful is negative feedback from your target audience. "Customers are typically more vocal about what they don’t like more than what they do like," she says.
But some good signs to look out for are improvements in engagement with your marketing, positive reviews, press and increase in retention, and overall feeling aligned with the new branding.
For more information about Lola and The Brand Doula, visit her website, thebranddoula.com.
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Not too long ago, while in a session with one of my clients, they were talking to me about having strong sex cravings that seemed to have come out of nowhere. After asking some questions for clarity’s sake, I got that the reason why they used the word “craving” is because it’s not like they are hornier than usual all of the time. Nah, it’s more like the urge creeps up at some pretty random and/or unexpected moments. What they wanted to know from me was if I thought that it was normal.
The short answer is “yes.”
Now, while it’s another message for another time that if this type of sex-related craving feels impulsive or out of one’s control, it could be a sign of someone who is leaning into some level of sex addiction; however, that is not what we’re going to unpack today. Today, we’re going to look into what could be going on with you if it seems like, lately, you’ve been having a greater desire for sex, and you can’t quite pinpoint why.
Because, just like, say, a craving for a particular type of food oftentimes reveals something that is going on with you physically or mentally — sex cravings tend to bring certain things to light in those same areas, too.
Let’s dig in…
Hormonal Shifts
GiphyAlthough I don’t have social media accounts, I do tiptoe out there to see what’s going on — and boy, do I roll my eyes whenever I hear folks act like being over 40 is old. SMDH. It’s especially annoying when I hear about it in the context of sex because, believe it or not, there are a lot of late perimenopausal and menopausal women who are “gettin’ theirs” more than some of these 20 and 30-year-olds are (just ask them).
One reason is that the fear of experiencing an unplanned pregnancy, for many, is now in their rearview mirror. Another is because some are taking a form of hormone therapy to treat the changes that their system is going through — and when you’re getting more estrogen, progesterone, and/or testosterone into your body (in order to level things out) — HUNNAY.
For other women, even consuming phytoestrogens (plant-based estrogen) like peaches, garlic, berries, spinach, and cabbage can make them want sex more than when those aren’t a part of their diet. Bottom line here, a shift in your sexual hormones can definitely cause you to desire sex more than you have before (or have in a while).
Ovulation
GiphyBack when I was a teen mom director for the local chapter of a national non-profit, something that I used to tell “my daughters” all of the time is when you know that you’re ovulating, that’s when you need to be hypervigilant about using wisdom when it comes to the sex-related decisions that you make. I’m thinking that most of you get why: your body was designed to feel its horniest when you’re able to get pregnant — and that is during your time of ovulation.
That’s why it really is a good idea to keep up with your cycle and, if a baby is not something that is on your priority list right now, you either avoid having sex during that time of the month or make sure to use some form of birth control. Chile, even women with low libidos can find themselves wanting to hang off of a chandelier or two when they are ovulating. It’s nature’s way.
A Healthy Diet
GiphyIf you happen to be someone with a sluggish sex drive and you know that you spend most of your time in a drive-thru, there is probably a direct correlation there. No joke. There is plenty of research out in cyberspace to support the fact that a wack diet and low sex drive have a lot in common. While processed foods and unhealthy fats can throw your (sex) hormones off, foods that are filled with zinc, vitamins B12 and D, and iron can ramp up your desire for intimacy.
This is why many people who decide to make a lifestyle change as far as their eating habits are concerned are oftentimes surprised by how much sex is on their minds and how much easier it is for them to orgasm because of it. While a part of it can be due to a boost in their sexual confidence, a lot of it has to do with consuming foods that will literally feed their libido (in a healthy way).
More Exercise
GiphyPlainly put, exercise makes you hornier. Not only does it boost your testosterone levels, (consistently) working out also lowers your stress levels and gives you a boost in the self-esteem department. On top of that, exercise makes you more flexible, builds up endurance, and increases blood circulation which can turn around and intensify your climaxes as a direct result. In fact, this is oftentimes why people will want to have sex right after a workout session.
While we’re here, let me also share that too much of a good thing can end up being counterproductive. What I mean by that is, that although it is wise to exercise on a regular basis, make sure to not overdo it. Something known as overtraining syndrome can result in fatigue, insomnia, and irritability; no one can really have amazing sex when all of that is going on.
Being a Certain Age
GiphyWhile it used to be said that the sexual peak for men is in their teens and for women, it’s in their 30s (some believe it’s because after 35, it’s more challenging for women to get pregnant and so our biological clock plays a role in it all), some research believes that coming to that conclusion isn’t fair because aging affects people differently. For instance, while on one hand, people in their 40s tend to see a dip in their sex hormones, as we’ve already discussed, hormone therapy (for both men and women) can level some of those issues out, if not increase some people’s sex drives altogether.
Adding to that, it should also go on record that some studies indicate that women between the ages of 27-45 actually have a stronger desire — or craving — for sex than women between the ages of 18-26. So honestly, there goes the myth that being younger (automatically) means that you’re hornier. #Elmoshrug
Certain Medications
GiphyIf you used to have a higher sex drive and you’re currently on an antidepressant, that could be why your desire for copulation has decreased. Some studies say that as much as 40 percent of people who are on these types of medication end up having a lower libido (by the way, antihistamines and beta-blockers can have this effect, too).
On the other hand, if you’ve been taking a prescribed drug to increase your sex drive (perhaps like Vyleesi or Addyi), then it would make sense that you may have an increased libido level. Other meds that may have a similar effect include birth control pills (since they alter your hormones), medications that help to treat Parkinson’s disease, along with dopamine-related drugs.
Less Stress
GiphyIf, on the days when you don’t seem to have a care in the world, you also desire sex more than usual, that’s not a coincidence either. Thing is, when you’re all stressed out, that can cause the stress hormone known as cortisol to work overtime and, when that happens, that can end up suppressing your sex hormones which can deplete you of sexual urges. Ironically, there is a flip side to this because when you engage in sexual activity, that actually elevates feel-good (and bonding) hormones like dopamine, oxytocin, and endorphins, which can also de-stress you.
So basically, if you’re craving sex, you probably aren’t very stressed out (right now), and if you want to stop being stressed out, you probably should have some sex (some protected sex, if you don’t want to be stressed later up the road…if you know what I mean).
Having an Amazing Sex Life
GiphyTo me, this one right here should be a given because when something is both good to and for you, why wouldn’t you want more of it? So yeah, if you have a great sex life with someone, it’s common sense that you’d want to engage in that act with them as much as possible. Hey, not to mention the fact that orgasms activate your brain in a way similar to a drug high does.
So, if while reading this, you’re thinking about sexting your bae to make arrangements to — eh hem — satisfy your craving, I say go for it! To “greatly want” to connect with your partner in order to have some fulfilling and satisfying sex? What in the world could possibly be wrong with that?! Not a damn thing.
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