I mean, maybe it’s just me, but when it comes to dealing with the monthly occurrence that is our periods, even though our vagina is very much involved, it’s rare that I will see content that is centered around that body part alone (relatively speaking). Sure, I read period hacks fairly often, but — what I mean is, where are the articles that are devoted to prepping and loving on your vagina and vulva specifically so that your period can be a lot less…intense?
A wise person once said that if you don’t like something, instead of complaining about it, why not do it yourself? Indeed…INDEED. So today, in honor of our vagina (and vulva) and all that it goes through every time our cycle rolls around, here are 15 ways that you can get it ready for the…well, inevitable.
15 Period-Prep Tips for Your Vagina
1. Buy Unscented Pads or Tampons
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I’ve said before that I wish that I had known about menstrual cups YEARS ago. Since I’ve been using one, I’ve pretty much only relied on pads on my heaviest days (as backup). Yet even during my tampons (in my 20s) and pad seasons, I’ve avoided all of the scented stuff. My vagina is pretty sensitive all on its own, so fragrances and dyes don’t help it one bit. I’m not alone, either.
Even the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) highly recommends that, if you want to keep your pH balance where it needs to be, the less chemicals on your menstrual products (and in your toilet paper), the better. A cheat sheet on how to find the best ones is to look for what is branded as being “organic.” You can also read up on some Black-owned menstrual care brands here and here.
2. “Trim the Lawn”
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When you’ve got a real bestie, you tend to talk about everything — TMI ish ‘n all. One of mine, we sometimes debate “to go bald or to keep” when it comes to pubic hair. Me? I’m Team Keep, although I do wax the “outer perimeters” and bikini line on a consistent basis.
I also try to keep things like a golf course (as one of my friends says. LOL); especially when my period is about to come on. Not only does it make me feel fresher, but it makes — let me pick something not super graphic — unraveling from any blood remnants so much easier to do every day (until my cycle ends).
3. Apply a Carrier Oil
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If your vulva (the outer part of your vagina) tends to feel either irritated (from the blood) or dry (if you do wear a menstrual cup or tampon), you can protect that part of your body by applying a carrier oil; especially at night (when you may not be changing your menstrual products as much).
If you’re concerned about which ones could end up doing more harm than good (as far as irritation is concerned), check out “So, Here Are The Carrier Oils That Will Take Your Sex Life To A Whole 'Nother Level” when you get a chance. It lists 12 oils that your vagina will embrace instead of repel. Personally, I’m a carrot seed oil fan; the Vitamin E in it is quite soothing.
4. Up Your Hydration
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How much blood you lose during your cycle kind of varies per person (although if you bleed through a tampon or pad every 1-2 hours or for more than seven days consistently, you may have what is called menorrhagia; you should definitely speak with your doctor). What does apply, across the board, is the loss of blood can lead to dehydration, intensified period cramps, bloating, and hella-fied fatigue.
So, when you feel PMS coming up, ramp up your water intake. It really does help to make all of these issues…less of one.
5. Take More Probiotics
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Something that typically happens right before your period begins is the progesterone levels in your body increase. That’s because, if you were to get pregnant, progesterone is what helps to prepare your uterine lining to support your pregnancy. When you don’t, in order for the lining to shed (which is basically what having a period is all about), progesterone levels must shift.
All of this “shifting” can result in you experiencing digestive issues — including (sometimes) constipation (or going to the bathroom more than usual). Not only that, but periods can also put quite a bit of stress on your body as well. Plus, yeast infections come when bad bacteria overtake good bacteria (and you can get a yeast infection at any time). Something that can help with all of this is taking a probiotic.
Honestly, since probiotics also help with improving your gut health, keeping you energized and in a good mood, and even reducing belly fat, it’s best to incorporate one into your daily health regimen. You can take probiotics in supplement form. Also, some foods that are high in probiotics include fermented ones like yogurt, pickles, and cheese.
6. Buy an OTC Antihistamine
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Now here’s something that I bet you didn’t have on your period prep bingo card. Did you know that if you take an over-the-counter antihistamine right before your cycle, it can somewhat decrease your blood flow during it? The thought process here is that the natural histamine that’s in your system will elevate your estrogen levels around the time of your cycle which can lead to more shedding of your uterine lining.
So, while tossin’ back Claritin pills like it’s candy isn’t recommended, having one or two on your heaviest day could provide a bit of (flow) relief.
7. Enjoy Some Phytoestrogens
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On the flip side, towards the end of your period, your estrogen levels will drop. Because low estrogen can result in symptoms like irritability, tender breasts, a lack of concentration, vaginal dryness, and even dry skin, it certainly can’t hurt to consume some phytoestrogens (plant-based estrogen foods). Some of those would include dried fruits, berries, garlic, cabbage, collards, and wheat bran.
8. Eat Iron-Rich Foods
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There is a lot of iron in your red blood cells, and since blood is what you’re losing during your period, eating some iron-rich foods is highly recommended, too. In fact, you might be surprised to know that when you have an iron deficiency, it can affect your libido and lubrication levels and even your ability to have orgasms (chile). So yeah, definitely get that iron in. Some foods that are loaded with it include red meat, quinoa, beans, turkey, and broccoli.
9. Consume Less Sugar
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If you’ve ever wondered why you suddenly want to eat everything sweet that you can get your hands on right before and during your period — well, not only can you put that on your hormones fluctuating, but sweet and starchy foods can also give you a “hit” of serotonin which can happily put you in a happier state of mind. Problem is, that sugar can increase inflammation and inflammation can make period pain worse.
Not only that but speaking of yeast infections, if you’ve never had a yeast infection during your cycle, LUCKY YOU. Even though period blood alters the pH balance to where symptoms related to one can also decrease, the yeast will be waiting on you once the bleeding stops — and yeast literally feeds off of sugar. So yeah — junk food in moderation, please.
10. Load Up on Condoms
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If you’re down for period sex, there are a few reasons why it’s best to have your partner use a condom (if he’s not doing so already). One, the prostaglandins in your partner’s sperm/semen could actually trigger cramps (because some vaginas are very sensitive to them). Two, because sperm can live inside of your vagina for up to five days. If your cycle is all over the place…yes, you can get pregnant while on your period. And third, blood doesn’t stop STIs/STDs from being transmitted. So, if you are running low on rubbers, now would be the time to pick some up.
11. Prepare to Take Showers…Unless
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Even though a warm bath can actually help to soothe your menstrual cramps, if you’re a heavy bleeder, you’re gonna be attempting to wash yourself with blood in the water; that’s why showers are probably best (at least on your heavy days). There is a workaround for this: put a menstrual cup or tampon in before getting into the tub.
Showers are totally my thing, so this tip doesn’t apply to me personally. However, if you find showering to be kind of “blah,” check out “How To Turn Your Showers Into A Tranquil DIY Spa.” It might just make taking showers your favorite thing about having a period!
12. Avoid Hot Water. Kind Of.
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When it comes to this particular point, while drinking warm/hot water can help to soothe cramping, I’m still talking about bathing here. Honestly, hot water isn’t the best thing, period, because it tends to dehydrate your skin. The reason why I say “maybe” in this case is, that if you don’t have a heavy blood flow, you probably won’t care about how hot water increases blood circulation.
Oh, but if you do and you tend to shower/bathe in the morning — don’t be surprised if that awesome “hot time” leads to some unexpected leaks on the way to work. #justsayin’
13. Try Some Aquaphor
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If you don’t have a really strong blood flow, you’re a tampon wearer, and it can feel uncomfortable to put them in; applying something like Aquaphor around the entrance of your vagina can make tampons so much easier to insert. Something else that I like about this particular hack is Aquaphor is also a solid skin barrier if your vaginal fluids irritate your vulva during your special time of the month.
14. Do (More) Meditating
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Although many health experts are still looking into this, it would make sense that meditation would help with period discomfort. One, because it is a proven stress reliever, and two, there is plenty of data to support that it can help with reducing chronic pain. So, even if you don’t really feel like exercising while you’re on your period (although that can be beneficial for you, too), at least devote 5-20 minutes of meditating. You might not need (so much) Advil if you do.
15. Take Naps
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Taking naps leading into your cycle (and during it) not only helps in the fatigue department, but they also help to reduce stress (even if it’s only a 15-minute one). And since yes, you can absolutely stress your vagina out (check out “Ever Wonder If Your Vagina Is Stressed TF Out?”) and piss it off (check out “Welp. Here Are 15 Things That Could Be Pissing Your Vagina Off.”); especially during “that time of the month.”
So, don’t feel the least bit guilty about ramping up your nap schedule. You’re doing your vagina (and the rest of you) a ton of good if you do!
BONUS FOR AFTERWARDS: Wear Your Menstrual Cup an Extra Day
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Although I don’t smell anything while I’m on my period, the day right after the flow stops, it sometimes smells almost like…death. I looked up why, and it’s basically because there is still some tissue and bacteria that is still coming out. That’s also why my vulva and vaginal opening would be so irritated. I found a solution: I wear my menstrual cup on that day, too. That way, it can catch all of the drama, and I don’t have to suffer.
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So, now that you know what your vagina needs for your period, doesn’t that make everything about how to approach your period seem so much better? Gee, I certainly hope so, sis. With all that you go through during that time of the month, you absolutely deserve it.
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So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.
In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.
In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.
And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.
We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.
So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.
That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.
This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
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Apparently, there was a Thanksgiving episode that featured all of the friends having dinner together. And y’all, there was simply no way that I was going to mention the latter without shouting out the original (amen?).
Okay, so with that out of the way — Friendsgiving. Something that I appreciate about twists to holidays like this is that it’s a reminder that there is no one way to celebrate special occasions. And so, if, for whatever the reason, you will not or cannot be with family during the holiday season, there are certainly other alternatives at your disposal.
That being said, if the thought of spending time with friends this Thanksgiving is something that you’d like to do, yet you’re not sure how to host it in a way that will make Friendsgiving a fan favorite for your entire circle — I’ve got 10 suggestions that can make the planning process easy as pumpkin (or sweet potato) pie.
1. Position Chrysanthemums or Orchids for Your Table Décor
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Let’s start with décor first. Listen, aside from cleaning up your place, you don’t have to be over the top. If you put together a really nice centerpiece or put a flower at each table setting, honestly, you’re all good. And if you’re someone who is big on details and symbolism, my recommendation would be to go with some chrysanthemums and/or orchids.
When it comes to chrysanthemums, not only are they a peak fall flower, they represent things like friendship and happiness. And orchids? They tend to bloom during the fall and spring seasons and, not only are they about luxury, certain orchid colors also symbolize friendship (for the record, yellow roses symbolize friendship too). Perfect.
2. Incorporate Scents That Cultivate Gratitude
Speaking of cultivating a warm and inviting space, you can never go wrong with scented soy candles — or at least having an essential oil diffuser in a few spots. Some scents that actually help to bring in the spirit of gratitude include vanilla, jasmine, ginger, cedarwood and frankincense.
3. Use Upscale Paper Products to Dine With
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Let’s be real — a lot more of us would probably host events in our home if it wasn’t for the mess that is left behind in our kitchen once the festivities are over. Wanna avoid that? Use paper plates. No, I don’t mean the cheap Styrofoam ones. SMDH. These days, there are paper (and plastic) plate brands that will low-key blow your mind when it comes to how bougie they look. Some that are worth considering are located here, here and here.
4. Handwrite Thank-You Notes (Use Them As Place Settings)
If you’re like Tiffany (from the HBO series Insecure — what a time) was at that memorable dinner party when all hell broke loose between Lawrence and Issa and you’re pretty anal — I mean, particular — LOL — about place settings, it’s a nice touch to pick up some blank thank-you cards that you can write a personalized “I’m thankful for you because…” message in. Place each one where you’d like each friend to sit. They won’t see it coming and it’s a really nice touch.
5. Have Everyone Bring Their Favorite Homemade Dish
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Okay, and what if what has you on the fence about hosting is you don’t feel like doing a ton of cooking? Chile, this is where the concept of having a potluck comes in. Get everyone to bring the dish that they claim they cook the best and make sure to let them know how many individuals you plan on coming (so that they will make enough). You can even make a game out of it by having everyone anonymously vote for the first, second and third best dishes out of the bunch. Take it up a notch by having a prize for each winner.
6. Take a Warm Drink and Dessert Poll Beforehand
You know what isn’t discussed enough about dinner parties? Folks bringing desserts that other people don’t even like. SMDH. You can avoid this from becoming an issue at your Friendsgiving by sending an email (most people prefer that to group chats; let’s be real — and make sure to BCC everyone as well) asking everyone to share what their top three favorite desserts and warm drinks are. Then pick the top 2-3 out of the bunch. That way, you won’t have a ton of (for instance) coffee cake or apple cider lying around that no one even wanted in the first place.
7. Create a Signature Friendsgiving Mocktail and Cocktail
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Speaking of drinks, another way to make your Friendsgiving memorable is to come up with a signature mocktail (for those who don’t consume alcohol) and cocktail. For the mocktail, you can also poll your friends about their favorite mocktail or fruits and come up with a mixture of your own. For the cocktail — although National Friendship Day is actually in August, I did peep that there are certain drinks that have been created in its honor. Some of them are located here for you to do a bit of tweaking on (if you’d like).
8. Ask Everyone to Share Their “Favorite Friend Quality” of Another
You know how it’s customary for everyone to go around and share what they are truly thankful for before having dinner? Well, to continue along with the Friendsgiving theme, have each person share what their favorite friend quality is about the person to their right. If folks are just meeting each other for the first time, instead they can share what they value the most in friendship overall, along with a story of how it was displayed to them personally over the past 12 months.
9. Send Each of Your Guests Home with a Fresh Gratitude Journal
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Wanna send folks home with a nice parting gift? It would be so on-trend to give each of them a gratitude journal. Listen, we are in some crazy times right through here (at least in the States) and so, encouraging your friends to set some time aside, regularly, to think about and then outwardly express what they are grateful for? That helps to keep stress down, keep things in perspective and it reminds us all to maintain a positive mindset as much as possible.
10. Watch a Nostalgic Movie
While everyone is enjoying dessert and drinks, how about watching a movie that brings back fond memories? A list of some of the most popular movies to come out previous Thanksgiving weekends is located here and a list of some favorite Black holiday-themed films can be found here. It’s a way to wind down and share some laughs before everyone heads home.
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Friendsgiving. What a wonderful way to celebrate your friends while also observing Thanksgiving in a way that is totally on your terms. And now that you know how to put it together, what are you waiting for? Hit your friends up and let them know that, whether it’s on actual Thanksgiving Day or a few days before or after, you’ve got a special dinner in mind.
One that has a good time with amazing friends written ALL over it.
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