
A couple of days ago, while I was looking for a GIF for another article, I saw one that tickled me. It featured a woman talking and included the caption “Discharge is the spit of the vagina.” I mean, I never really thought to look at it that way but she ain’t lyin’. LOL. And just think about it — when your mouth is parched or your vagina is dry, that can make you pretty uncomfortable.
The interesting thing about the vagina, though, is whenever the topic of its dryness comes up, it’s usually only in the context of sexual arousal. And while that is a very valid and relevant concern (because sex is not much fun if you’re not well-moisturized down there), as I was sharing with a client of mine, there are other things that can cause that part of your body to seem or be...dehydrated.
Let’s talk about some of those today. Oh, and the reason why I used to word “labia” instead of vagina in the title is because, usually, what causes us to even notice that we’ve got a dry situation going on is because the folds of skin that protect the outer part of our vagina (which is known as our vulva) is what’s causing much of the distress — and those, collectively, are called our labia.
So, if yours hasn’t been feeling “naturally lubed” lately and it’s outside of foreplay or sex, check out these 10 other causes to see if they might be the source of the stress.
1. Low Estrogen
GiphyAlthough your labia can feel dry no matter how old you are, there is a reason why I’m leading with low estrogen; it’s because it’s a direct result of being in the latter stages of perimenopause and menopause. Yep, the reason why a woman’s body goes through so many changes — hot flashes, irregular periods, shifts in her shape, extra weight in her midsection, peaks and valleys when it comes to her sex drive, etc. — is because as she ages, her estrogen levels start to decrease and that can impact her vaginal lining, including how moisturized it is.
So, if you are in your late 30s-late 40s, you’re noticing that you are dry and you can’t really figure out why, make an appointment with your physician to get your hormone levels checked. Honestly, it’s a pretty wise practice to do during that time regardless.
2. Diabetes
If you are diabetic, this is another thing that could cause your labia to feel dry. One reason is because it’s pretty common for people with diabetes to have challenges when it comes to their blood circulation and that plays a part in one’s natural lubrication. Also, women who are diabetic are twice as likely to experience some sort of nerve damage in their genital region which could also lead to a dry labia. This is another instance when speaking with your doctor would be best as far as finding a remedy that can help this to be less of an issue for you.
3. Your Period
GiphyWhen you’re on your period, you may or may not notice that your labia is dry…for pretty obvious reasons. However, if you happen to use a menstrual cup or tampon during that time of the month, dryness will definitely be more noticeable. Why does it happen? Because your hormones and going topsy-turvy and usually your period is a time when your estrogen levels are pretty low which means that you’re not producing as much natural lubrication. The upswing to this is, labia dryness tends to go away once your period ends.
4. Birth Control
If you’ve recently gotten on birth control and you’ve noticed that your labia is not as wet as it usually is, the good news is this is probably a temporary situation for you. Remember, the reason why things like the pill, the shot, skin patches, etc. are effective is because your hormones are being altered by them, so that it is much more difficult for you to conceive. Unfortunately, a side effect of all of this is you may have a harder time getting wet for a while.
An in-the-meantime remedy? Lubricant (check out “If You've Always Wanted A 'Lubricant Cheat Sheet,' Here Ya Go” and “The Wetter, The Better: 10 Creative Ways To Use Lubricant”). Never underestimate good lubricant.
5. Alcohol
GiphySince alcohol is a diuretic, this means that it has the ability to dehydrate you — and your genital region is not exempt from this. In fact, since that part of your body needs a boost in oxygen to arouse you and a sign of arousal is getting wetter down below, it would make sense that you would need to be well-hydrated (since water does indeed have oxygen in it). Does this mean that you can’t enjoy a glass of wine, a bottle of beer, or your favorite cocktail? Of course, not. Just make sure that, for the most part, you stick within the recommended allowance which is one glass a day for women (and two glasses a day for men).
6. Breastfeeding
As a doula, I can vouch for the fact that postpartum vaginal dryness is indeed a thing because, if there is ever a time when a woman’s hormones are all over the place, it’s when she’s just given birth and her body is trying to adjust to its “new normal.” And when it comes to a new mom’s estrogen levels, those tend to drop, especially so, while she’s in the process of breastfeeding. And since we’ve already discussed that estrogen helps with natural lubrication — there you go.
Something that can help you during this time is to take postnatal supplements, exercise, consume foods that are high in protein, read up on boron (it’s a supplement that helps your body to better absorb testosterone and estrogen), and apply vitamin E to your labia — it can help to soothe it if the dryness is causing irritation.
7. Anxiety/Depression
GiphyAbout five years ago, Forbes published an article entitled, “Can Your Mental Health Affect Your Vagina?” and the truth of the matter is that it absolutely can. One of the things that it mentioned is when you are feeling anxious, it can negatively impact how blood circulates in that part of your body which can lead to vaginal atrophy — and one symptom of that is vaginal dryness. Not only that but if you’re ever feeling anxious and/or depressed, that can also cause you to feel like your vagina is tightening up or even shrinking; especially if you happen to be in your 40s (peak perimenopausal age).
Deep breathing, meditation, a regular sleep pattern, less alcohol, and talking your feelings out are some ways to feel better and bring some of your natural lubrication back.
8. Medication
If you’re someone who is good for taking an antihistamine and your labia is dry, those two things definitely go hand in hand. It would appear that antihistamines can help to lessen your allergy symptoms; however, they’re also pretty good at hindering the neurotransmitters that signal your system to produce natural lubrication. Oh, and speaking of medicines, ones that treat asthma are prone to produce dryness too; especially in your mouth and vagina. Sedatives can also dry you out as well as blood pressure and heart medications. If you’re on any of these and your labia has lost some moisture, please mention it to your healthcare provider; they may be able to help.
9. Scented Vaginal Products
GiphyAnything that can alter your vagina’s pH (check out “Sis, This Is How To Keep Your Vagina's pH Balanced”) is something else that can cause your labia to feel a bit like a desert. When it comes to this point, what immediately comes to mind is vaginal washes that are full of chemicals and fragrances. Not only that but feminine sprays, douches, and even laundry detergent.
That’s why you should use vaginal washes that are as natural (and gentle) as possible (check out “Love On Yourself With These 7 All-Natural DIY Vaginal Washes,” “Are You Washing Your Vagina Correctly? You Sure?” and “Does Your Vagina Prefer You Take A Shower Or A Bath?”) and that you consider washing your undies by hand with a super mild detergent. While we’re here, also remember that vaginas are self-cleaning. This means that even too much water on them could possibly have a drying effect.
So, if you’re overdoing it in order to get rid of a strong odor, that usually is a sign of an infection. Call your doctor instead of scrubbing “her” (and drying her out) to death.
10. Stress
Been feeling taxed and spent? If that is indeed the case and you’ve been noticing that your labia is dry, stress just might be the culprit. Aside from the fact that stress is something else that restricts blood flow to your genitalia, stress is one more thing that can cause your estrogen and testosterone levels to tank. So, whether it’s taking a power nap, reading a book, going for a walk, hanging out with a friend, or — eh hem — setting a new boundary, don’t let stress overtake you. It’s not good for your overall health and well-being and your labia certainly doesn’t like it. Not one bit, sis.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Anele77/Getty Images
Because We Are Still IT, Girl: It Girl 100 Returns
Last year, when our xoNecole team dropped our inaugural It Girl 100 honoree list, the world felt, ahem, a bit brighter.
It was March 2024, and we still had a Black woman as the Vice President of the United States. DEI rollbacks weren’t being tossed around like confetti. And more than 300,000 Black women were still gainfully employed in the workforce.
Though that was just nineteen months ago, things were different. Perhaps the world then felt more receptive to our light as Black women.
At the time, we launched It Girl 100 to spotlight the huge motion we were making as dope, GenZennial Black women leaving our mark on culture. The girls were on the rise, flourishing, drinking their water, minding their business, leading companies, and learning to do it all softly, in rest. We wanted to celebrate that momentum—because we love that for us.
So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.

In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.

In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.

And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.

We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.

So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.

That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.

This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
Featured image by xoStaff
It Girl 100 Class Of 2025: Meet The Empire Builders You Need To Know
She's a boss, and she's minding the business that pays her. Literally and figuratively.
Whether she's launching her next business venture, turning passion projects into paper, or building her side hustle into a legacy, she's proof that visionary women don't wait for a seat at the table. She builds her own, then pulls up a chair for the next woman. The empire-builders of xoNecole's 2025 It Girl 100 lead with purpose and profit, spinning their "why" into wealth.
This year's It Girl 100 is a mosaic of brilliance, spotlighting entrepreneurs, cultural disruptors, beauty visionaries, and boundary-pushing creatives who embody the spirit of "Yes, And." This digital celebration honors the women who embrace every facet of themselves, proving you can chase the bag and still honor your desire to live life softly.
The women repping for the Business category are empire builders shaping the next generation of entrepreneurship, as founders, investors, and CEOs, shifting culture while expanding their brands and their net worth.
Here's the roll call for xoNecole's It Girl 100 Class of 2025: Business.

Artist and Founder of GROWN Media Kaya Nova
Courtesy
Kaya Nova
Her Handle: @thekayanova
Her Title: Artist and Founder, GROWN Media
Who's That It Girl: Kaya Nova is the artist-entrepreneur whose voice bridges melody and empowerment as the founder of GROWN Mag and GROWN Media. We celebrate her for turning her artistry into activism, creating music and experiences that honor womanhood, vulnerability, and the beauty of becoming your full self.
Her "Yes, And" Statement: "Yes, I'm multitalented and I'm powerful beyond measure."

Founder and CEO of Vineyard Icon Erin Goldson
Courtesy
Erin Goldson
Her Handle: @eringoldson
Her Title: Founder and CEO of Vineyard Icon
Who's That It Girl: We are inspired by Erin Goldson, brand marketer and founder of Vineyard Icon, a platform celebrating Martha’s Vineyard culture and creativity. She blends strategy and community building with effortless polish to turn ideas into impact.

Founder and CEO, My Happy Flo Necole Kane
Courtesy
Necole Kane
Her Handle: @hellonecole
Her Title: Founder and CEO, My Happy Flo
Who's That It Girl: Necole Kane is a media mogul and entrepreneur who founded NecoleBitchie.com and xoNecole.com. She now leads feminine wellness brand My Happy Flo, advocating for women's hormonal health through plant-based supplements and holistic solutions.

FORVR MOOD Co-Founder and Content Creator Jackie Aina
Credit: Kirstin Enlow
Jackie Aina
Her Handle: @jackieaina
Her Title: FORVR MOOD Co-Founder and Content Creator
Who's That It Girl: A trailblazer who changed the face of beauty forever, Jackie Asamoah built a legacy on authenticity and advocacy. We love her for redefining luxury through inclusion and for reminding women everywhere that self-care is a radical, joyful act.
Her "Yes, And" Statement: "Yes, I'm owning my power and finding balance in it."

Founder and Investor Shannae Ingleton Smith
Courtesy
Shannae Ingleton Smith
Her Handle: @torontoshay
Her Title: Founder and Investor
Who's That It Girl: Shannae Ingleton Smith is President and Co-founder of Kensington Grey, an influencer agency representing 200+ creators. A former media sales executive, she now invests in creator-led startups, including 12PM Studios.
Her "Yes, And" Statement: "Yes, I’m breaking ceilings and expanding the table."

Founder of LORVAE De'arra Taylor
Courtesy
De'arra Taylor
Her Handle: @dearra
Her Title: Founder of Fashion Brand LORVAE
Who's That It Girl: We celebrate De'arra Taylor as the founder and CEO of LORVAE, an eyewear brand built on reinvention, confidence, and bold individuality. Her creative direction turns sunglasses into statements and community into a lifestyle.

Founder of The Lip Bar Melissa Butler
Courtesy
Melissa Butler
Her Handle: @melissarbutler
Her Title: Founder of The Lip Bar
Who's That It Girl: Melissa Butler transformed The Lip Bar from a kitchen concept into a multimillion-dollar movement. We honor her for challenging industry norms and proving that boldness, beauty, and business brilliance can coexist unapologetically.

Director of Cultural Strategy & Innovation Denetrias Charlemagne
Courtesy
Denetrias “Dee” Charlemagne
Her Handle: @dcharlemagne
Her Title: Director of Cultural Strategy & Innovation, Walmart
Who's That It Girl: A powerhouse behind purpose-driven partnerships, Denetrias Charlemagne bridges culture and commerce at Walmart with grace and innovation. We honor her for amplifying representation in retail and using her platform to build spaces where authenticity and excellence thrive.

Chief Brand Officer at Unrivaled Kirby Porter
Courtesy
Kirby Porter
Her Handle: @kirbyporter
Her Title: Chief Brand Officer, Unrivaled
Who's That It Girl: Strategic, visionary, and driven by impact, Kirby Porter is building the future of athlete branding. We’re inspired by her as the founder of New Game Labs and Chief Brand Officer at Unrivaled, showing that strategy can be soulful and sport can be storytelling.

Founder and CEO of EveryStylishGirl Nana Agyemang
Courtesy
Nana Agyemang
Her Handle: @itsreallynana
Her Title: Founder and CEO of EveryStylishGirl
Who's That It Girl: A journalist turned founder, Nana Agyemang built EveryStylishGirl to amplify Black women in media. We love her for opening doors, building pipelines of opportunity, and using her voice to change the face of modern storytelling.
Her "Yes, And" Statement: "Yes, I'm a boss and I'm still soft."

Vice President of Content at ESSENCE Nandi Howard
Courtesy
Nandi Howard
Her Handle: @itsnandibby
Her Title: Vice President of Content, ESSENCE
Who's That It Girl: We are inspired by Nandi Howard, Vice President of Content and Editorial at ESSENCE. Her leadership elevates Black culture with clarity and celebration and shapes the stories and standards that move audiences.

Founder of Sisters In Media Oladotun Idowu
Courtesy
Oladotun Idowu
Her Handle: @ola_idowu
Her Title: Founder of Sisters In Media
Who's That It Girl: We celebrate Oladotun Idowu, entertainment marketing leader at Campari Group and founder of Sisters in Media, for bridging brands and culture while championing women of color across media. Strategy and purpose guide her work.
Her "Yes, And" Statement: "Yes I'm walking into rooms with boldness and grace knowing that God has way more in stored for me."

Founder of Fortune & Forks Krystal Vega
Courtesy
Krystal Vega
Her Handle: @krystalvega
Her Title: Founder of Fortune & Forks, Multimedia
Who's That It Girl: Krystal Vega’s work lives at the intersection of innovation and influence. We celebrate her as a next-gen entrepreneur shaping digital spaces where women of color lead confidently, create fearlessly, and build legacies beyond the screen.
Her "Yes, And" Statement: "Yes, I'm that girl and so are you."

Founder of Fortune & Forks Naomi Wright
Courtesy
Naomi Wright
Her Handle: @naomiwrighttt
Who's That It Girl: Naomi Wright leads with style, purpose, and power. We’re inspired by her for building platforms like Fortune & Forks that merge beauty, business, and bold self-expression, proving that influence can be both impactful and intentional.

Entrepreneur and Podcast Host Emma Grede
Shutterstock
Emma Grede
Her Handle: @emmagrede
Her Title: Entrepreneur and Podcast Host
Who's That It Girl: Emma Grede is CEO and co-founder of Good American, and founding partner of SKIMS. She's a podcast host and the first Black female investor on ABC's Shark Tank.

CEO and Founder of TFNA Entertainment & Sports Management Kia Brooks
Courtesy
Kia Brooks
Her Handle: @kiajbrooks
Her Title: CEO and Founder of TFNA Entertainment & Sports Management
Who's That It Girl: Entrepreneur and mother, Kia J. Brooks leads TFNA Talent Agency, representing top athletes and creatives. She’s known for breaking barriers, negotiating record NIL deals, and empowering others to build generational wealth.

Sports & Entertainment Brand Manager Des Dickerson
Courtesy
Des Dickerson
Her Handle: @itsurdestinee
Her Title: Sports & Entertainment Brand Manager and Media Strategist
Who's That It Girl: Des Dickerson is a sports and entertainment brand manager and media strategist who works with top athletes and entertainers to elevate their platforms. She is recognized for creating innovative partnerships and driving visibility in sports and entertainment.
Her "Yes, And" Statement: "Yes, I build opportunities for athletes and entertainers and I transform them into lasting influence."

President of Collective Edge Management Shayla Cowan
Courtesy
Shayla Cowan
Her Handle: @shayla_pc
Her Title: President, Collective Edge Management
Who's That It Girl: Shayla Cowan is an award-winning producer and President of Collective Edge. She's produced blockbuster films including Girls Trip and Beast, championing boundary-pushing storytellers and innovative artistry in entertainment.

Co-Founder & CEO of Fearless Fund
Courtesy
Arian Simone
Her Handle: @ariansimone
Her Title: Co-Founder & CEO, Fearless Fund
Who's That It Girl: Arian Simone champions women of color in venture capital. She advocates for economic justice, investing globally in women entrepreneurs and addressing funding disparities rooted in racism and sexism through resilient, purpose-driven leadership.

Founder of Global State of Women and Seed, Valeisha Butterfield
Courtesy
Valeisha Butterfield
Her Handle: @valeisha
Her Title: Founder of Global State of Women and Seed
Who's That It Girl: Valeisha Butterfield Jones is a globally recognized leader in tech, entertainment, and politics. This year, she created the Global State of Women platform, providing emergency grants to women facing high unemployment rates.
Founder and Content Creator Ava PearlCourtesyAva Pearl
Her Handle: @avapearl
Her Title: Founder and Content Creator
Who's That It Girl: Ava Pearl is the founder of Curly Culture and Curly Con LA, initiatives that champion natural hair and foster community within the beauty industry. As a beauty and lifestyle content creator, she is dedicated to creating impactful content that inspires authenticity, confidence, and self-expression.
Her "Yes, And" Statement: "Yes, I’m rooted in authenticity and rising with purpose."
Now that you've met the ladies about their business, see who else made our list. Tap into the full It Girl 100 Class of 2025 and meet all the women changing game this year and beyond. See the full list here.
Featured image by xoStaff






