Kehlani is the epitome of authenticity as the singer and songwriter use their talents and platform to address real-life situations, particularly in their music regarding relationships.
They first gained recognition as a member of the group Poplyfe on America's Got Talent in 2011. Following this, Kehlani embarked on a successful solo career, releasing mixtapes like You Should Be Here and their debut album SweetSexySavage. SweetSexySavage reached number 3 on the Billboard Hot 200 chart and earned Kehlani a Grammy nomination for the hit song "Distraction."
Throughout their career, Kehlani has continued to release music, including mixtapes and albums. Recently, the star has been gearing up for the release of their fourth studio album, Crash, set to drop on June 21.
Aside from their musical achievements, the 29-year-old has been open about their personal life, discussing their identity, sexuality, and past relationships. Prior to publicly identifying as a lesbian in 2021, they had dated individuals of various genders within the entertainment industry.
In this piece, xoNecole looks back at Kehlani's romantic relationships and the lessons they've learned.
PARTYNEXTDOOR
One of Kehlani's high-profile relationships was with singer and producer PARTYNEXTDOOR.
Although there are conflicting timelines regarding when the pair began dating, it was reported that their romance started as early as 2013. Throughout their union, Kehlani and PARTYNEXTDOOR remained relatively private. One instance where the "Recognize" singer hinted at the duo's relationship was in 2015, the same year they allegedly called it quits.
After their breakup, PARTYNEXTDOOR released a song titled "Kehlani's Freestyle," which would ultimately be renamed "Things & Such." The drama between the exes didn't stop there. In 2016, when Kehlani was reportedly dating NBA star Kyrie Irving, PARTYNEXTDOOR notoriously uploaded a photo of him and the "Honey" vocalist holding hands with a subliminal message.
"After all her shenanigans, still got the R&B singer back in my bed," he wrote in the caption.
While the exact timeline of when the photos were taken is unclear, it didn't stop Kehlani from facing backlash due to cheating allegations. Despite denying the cheating rumors, the online pressure and torment took a toll on Kehlani when they were hospitalized in March 2016 for attempting to commit suicide.
In a now-deleted Instagram post, Kehlani explained their mindset and stood firm on their previous remarks about their union with Kyrie. The "Distraction" songstress added that they rekindled their relationship with PARTYNEXTDOOR after both parties realized it wasn't working out.
Kehlani and PARTYNEXTDOOR's reignited romance didn't last long because the pair would split for good that same year.
Kyrie Irving
Shortly following their first breakup with PARTYNEXTDOOR, Kehlani began dating Kyrie Iriving in 2016.
The former couple paraded their relationship publicly by sharing various posts online and providing insight about why the pair was a good match. In an interview with ILY magazine, Kehlani revealed that their union was special because their foundation was solely built on friendship.
"I think this is the first time that I've ever been able to really be myself at all times," they said. "In the sense of being incredibly goofy with someone and being based on a best friendship."
Sadly, Kehlani's romance with the Dallas Mavericks guard would be short-lived. The duo would go their separate ways before PARTYNEXTDOOR's social media post. Despite their breakup and the alleged cheating scandal, Kyrie came to Kehlani's defense after they were harassed on social media, which resulted in their hospitalization.
In a series of tweets, Kyrie wished the star well and confirmed that he and Kehlani weren't dating when the snapshot was released.
"I do not justify the picture or what dude did to try and spark all of this nonsense that could have been avoided, but me and Kehlani were not dating when the picture came out," he said.
Years after their break up in 2018, Kyrie issued an apology to Kehlani on social media for not speaking up sooner.
Shania Negron
Kehlani and Shania Negron
Photo by Paras Griffin/Getty Images for BET
Kehlani and tattoo artist Shania Negron were romantically linked in 2017.
Although there aren't many details regarding the pair's union, including how they met and when they started dating, Kehlani and Shania shared fragments of their life by making joint appearances at various events. That same year, the duo's relationship would come to an end.
In a 2018 interview with Queen Radio, Kehlani disclosed that the exes have remained friends despite the split.
"We've been just friends since then," they said. "That relationship actually wasn't very long, but me and her are super cool now."
Javaughn Young-White
In 2018, Kehlani made headlines when they posted on their social media platforms that they were expecting their first child, sparking attention to the father's identity. Although the "Nunya" songstress didn't release the person's name at the time of the announcement, it was later revealed that the child's father was a guitarist and long-time collaborator, Javaughn Young-White.
In an interview with Queen Radio, Kehlani opened up about their relationship with Javaughn and their planned pregnancy.
"When I found out that I can get a break from touring because I've been primarily a touring artist, that's when I planned for it for this time," they said. "It was planned so we had a short time frame of having to actually have sex every day. And we were excited that it didn't start feeling like a chore."
Further into the conversation, the "Can I" singer disclosed why Javaughn was an ideal match.
"I started dating women before I ever dated men," they said. "Then, I was lucky to find a partner who was a bisexual male. And he really understands my queerness and my fluidity, and I really understand his. It's very awesome to be understood."
A few months later, in March 2019, Kehlani and Javaughn welcomed their daughter, Adeya Nomi. Despite their daughter's arrival, the pair would ultimately call it quits. Since then, Kehlani and Javaughn have remained close friends and co-parents.
YG
Kehlani and YG
Photo by TM/Bauer-Griffin/GC Images
Kehlani's dating status made headlines once again in September 2019 after they revealed in a now-deleted Instagram post that they were dating YG. This news came after the pair attended New York Fashion Week together.
Despite the grand announcement about their relationship, Kehlani and YG's union would be plagued by numerous splits and allegations of infidelity on the rapper's part. The former couple's final breakup would occur on Valentine's Day 2020, around the same time they would release a joint song titled "Konclusions."
Days later, in response to the record, Kehlani released "Valentine's Day (Shameful)," which highlighted the painful experience they endured finding out that their partner was unfaithful.
Since that time, Kehlani and YG have remained on friendly terms.
Victoria Monét
In a jaw-dropping revelation during a 2023 interview, Victoria Monét finally ended years of speculation by confirming her brief romance with Kehlani. While appearing on the High Low podcast, the "On My Mama" vocalist revealed that the pair were seeing each other in 2020. This subject arose when Victoria was asked how her significant other, John Gaines, handles jealousy.
"While pregnant, I did a 'Touch Me' remix with Kehlani, and the song is about her. We went in the studio, [and] there was no jealousy," she said.
The mother of one also added that although the pair didn't work out, they are still friends.
070 Shake
Kehlani and 070 Shake sparked romance rumors in early 2021 when they were caught engaging in public displays of affection. Before taking their relationship to the next level, the pair had been friends for six years.
Shortly after the rumors began circulating online, Kehlani and 070 Shake confirmed they were an item. 070 Shake even appeared in the singer’s music video for “Melt.” However, in 2022, they wiped all shared photos of each other from their respective social media pages and unfollowed one another, sparking breakup allegations. The “Gangsta” songstress verified the split by sharing a cryptic post on their Instagram story.
"Play stupid games, win stupid prizes," they wrote.
Kiara Russell
In December 2022, Kehlani publicly debuted their relationship with basketball player Kiara Russell in a now-removed TikTok video. In the clip, the pair were seen lounging on the couch and exchanging kisses.
Kiara followed suit by uploading a colossal of photos, one of which included the pair out on date. The basketball star captioned the post, "love n happiness dump."
Since then, the status of the duo's relationship has remained unclear because most of Kehlani's posts featuring Kiara have been removed from their social media platforms.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image by Rodin Eckenroth/Getty Images
RELATED
Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
GiphyUnmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
GiphyOkay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
GiphyIf off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
GiphyA friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
GiphyIt’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
GiphyI once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
___
Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Shutterstock
Using the same material from the interior of the Volvo EX90, Hudson crafted a wool-blend car coat and waistbelt that combine the vehicle’s Scandinavian design with his signature tailoring and intention. The exclusive collection launched on October 20, and each piece is made-to-order by Sergio Hudson Collections.
Courtesy
In October, I traveled to Charleston with a group of journalists to get a firsthand look at Hudson and Volvo’s location. During a fitting, Hudson said his goal is to make “great work that can stand the test of time.”
“People can look back on and say, ‘I remember when Sergio did that collaboration with Volvo,’” he continued. “Thinking about aligning yourself with classic brands that speak to where you want to go. And I think that's what this collaboration kind of means to me and my business.”
Hudson pinpoints his mom as the biggest influence for his designs. This collaboration was no different.
“This particular coat reminded me of the swing coats that my mom used to wear in the early 90s. You know, diva girls in the early 90s had Sandra suits,” he said, referring to Jackée Harry’s character in 227. “My mom wore those and she would have these matching swing coats to go over them. And that's where the initial idea came. This would be around the same time that we had our Volvo. So she would put on her suit, her swing coat, get in that red Volvo, and go to church.”
Courtesy
With this capsule and beyond, Hudson wants to see more staples rotating in and out of closets this fall. He advises fashionistas to build her closet out with essentials to mix and match that aren’t just stylish but also sustainable.
“It's just those special pieces,” he said. “You can wear the same shirt and pants every day and nobody will notice. But if you have a special boot, a special coat, a special bill, a special bag, that kind of speaks to everything that your style stands about, that is something you should focus on.”
These are the same kind of staple pieces that return to our Pinterest boards and TikTok feeds season after season. Fast fashion has never been Hudson’s aim. “I'm trying to create a special pieces that can stand the test of time,” he said in his warm, Southern accent. “I'm only creating those kind of pieces from here on out.”
Courtesy
For Hudson, this collaboration is revolutionary. It’s his first time working with a car company and experimenting outside of his wheelhouse in this way.
“This is a Scandinavian brand, and, you know, it's 70 years old. I'm an African-American boy from South Carolina that has had a brand for 10 years. So I think bridging those two worlds and seeing the similarities was the beauty of this project,” he explained.
Though Hudson and his partner and CEO of Sergio Hudson Collections Inga Beckham have made massive strides in just 10 years, Hudson said the industry is far from where he wants to see it when it comes to Black representation. He pointed to how few Black designers were at this year’s Met Gala despite the theme being Black dandyism.
“The fact that I dressed 18 people speaks to how many of us weren't there,” he said. He implored more of industries, fashion and beyond, to collaborate with Black designers often.
“Allow mentorship. Allow funding. Allow great design to shine through,” he implored. “When it comes to being a designer of African descent, when you can't get the funding that your counterparts have, you can't compete. When you get opportunities like doing a collaboration with Volvo, or you get opportunities to be at the Met Gala, that's putting us on the equal playing field, but really the funding behind it is what we need to take it to that desk level.”
Featured image courtesy