

This year, we all need to make a conscious effort to keep our black dollars in our black communities by supporting black-owned businesses on Black Friday and the entire holiday season. Listen, after we, the culture aka Black Twitter, bought every juicy chicken sandwich from Popeyes causing them to sell out in just two weeks, we proved that black buying power is as strong as Beyonce's wig glue.
For years, we have heralded the day after Thanksgiving as the holy grail of sales and the first day of Christmas season shopping. Remember when Issa Rae said she was rooting for everybody black at the Emmys? Well, it's time to keep that same energy while throwing items in your bag or cart.
Scroll through our black AF list from clothing to candles to wine to extensions to so many more. We have supplied you with some of dope businesses to support this holiday season!
For The Aspiring Sommelier: Love Cork Screw
They say the blacker the berry, the sweeter the juice and that's why supporting Chrishon Lampley, wine enthusiast and founder of Love Cork Screw, will be the sweetest thing you will do this year. Offering five wine varieties, LCS bottles range in prices from $12 to $17. You've got choices like the sweet Riesling Head Over Heels, the American white table wine Touch the Sky, and the unforgettable rosé We Go High. More than anything, you should support Chrishon's LCS movement not only because she's a black woman in wine, but also because she uses her platform to mentor young women and promising entrepreneurs by sharing her journey.
What's better than a bottle of wine made from love and light? LCS has gift sets intermixed with two wine varietals, a Love Cork Screw candle and a Body Butter, perfect for that wine-lover in your friend group.
Shop Love Cork Screw here.
For The Vibe Queen: Alexandria Winbush
Alexandra Winbush
Because mental health matters, Brittney Winbush created Alexandra Winbush to shift our thoughts on this tough topic through mood-boosting candles and spirit-lifting teas. After surviving a house fire that threw her into depression and anxiety, she decided to share the piece of peace that got her through it. The founder told Coveted Style that the best part about her business is being able to help people have a sense of peace in the midst of craziness. Brittney recalled receiving a message from a customer saying that she was having a pretty mad day and as soon as she lit her candle, she felt better and more at peace. And that's what Britney affirms is the best part of her company.
The candle fills your space up with amazing aromas, inspirational sayings, and vibe-approved playlist.
Shop Alexandra Winbush here.
For The Weave Connoisseur: XOXO Virgin Hair
Wigs and extensions are the wave these days, so the once negative shock factor of wearing a wig is now as popular as Megan Thee Stallion's knees. Fashion model turned CEO Stephanie Nolan has always had an obsession with hair and its quality and longevity. Through collaborations with BET, Adidas and Lusters Hair Care, she learned that she could elevate hair extensions by making them ideal for the use of thermal tools, frequent styling and chemical alterations. Stephanie developed a collection that is 100 percent pure – free of chemicals or synthetic fillers to imitate natural hair.
We all love luxurious bundles and these locks are approved by some of our favorite beauty mavens like Jordyn Woods, Solange, Michaela Coel, Jackie Aina and many more. Use code XOXO on Black Friday for 40% off!
Shop XOXO Virgin Hair here.
For The Skincare Enthusiast: Touch Body Works
You could go to Bath & Body Works or you could give Touch Body Works a chance. Your face, skin and body will thank you for switching it up. TBW's mission is, "To offer the best natural skincare and haircare available. We believe in making products that are good for your body and for the environment. We believe in using only all-natural, sustainable ingredients that are plant-based and/or cruelty-free. We believe in showing the better side of natural beauty. Sans the chemicals, sans the clinical and sterile emotions, and sans the pretentious prices."
Throw some items in the bag for yourself, your significant other, your family or whoever appreciates the charm of authentic skin products.
Shop Touch Body Works here.
For The Artsy Creative: Abeille Creations
Abeille Creations
Self-taught artist Melissa Mitchell creates electrifying art that you can hang on your wall or drape on your body. There isn't a mural, canvas, headwrap, kimono or pair of Spanx she hasn't slayed. If you're looking for a wildly unique gift to give this season, Abeille Creations is a great place to start. Since Melissa was a youngin', she has found ways to incorporate bright colors and funky lines in her pieces because it's her favorite way to express herself. Her pieces exude confidence and personality which supports her goal of empowering everyone to rock her designs in all spaces from boardrooms to brunches.
Shop Abeille Creations here.
For The Cannabis Enthusiast: Mary & Main
*sings* Mary Jay-aaaaannnneeeeeee! Marijuana, Mary Jane, cannabis, weed or whatever you call it – it is one of the most beautiful plants on this earth with its immense healing properties. While you can cop it from different places, we wanted to equip you with a black-owned dispensary. Not sure if you know but Hope Wiseman was the youngest, African-American dispensary owner back in 2018 when she opened Mary & Main.
If you have a patient card, you can order premium quality cannabis products with exemplary and compassionate service.
Shop Mary & Main here.
For The Shoe Diva: Aminah Abdul Jillil
The Alaskan native started her first collection in 2012 after touring the world with Brittney Spears. Aminah loves to share her creativity through her shoe designs and has ever since she made her first sandal. We are pretty sure you have seen her designs as she is infamous for a large structured bow on a killer shoe. Aminah recalls her inspiration for the first shoe during an interview with Fustany, "The Aminah Abdul Jillil bow pumps were actually the bow sandals first. My husband bought me a purse for my birthday one year, which had a huge leather bow detail that I absolutely fell in love with! So I'd mostly gotten my inspiration from that purse and made a pair of sandals with black leather bows around the ankles."
Style these glamorous pumps or sandals with a simple little black dress or with a graphic tee and distressed jeans.
Shop Aminah Abdul Jillil here.
For The SJW: GreenBoxShop
Green Box Shop
Say it with your chest is a real thing and doing it with a GreenBoxShop is the way to do it. The badass brand was made extremely popular after Frank Ocean's 2017 Panorama set and was conceived by Kayla Robinson in her small apartment after searching for tees that conveyed her true feelings about social justice. She couldn't find any so she made them herself. GreenBoxShop began as a way for her to raise money to become a certified yoga instructor. To Kayla's surprise, she became a well-received t-shirt activist which is helping her delve into urban farming. Her endgame: making healthy and home-grown food more accessible in the many food deserts in our country.
Head over to the shop to add some fire tees to your cart.
Shop GreenBoxShop here.
For The Avid Reader: Semicolon Bookstore & Gallery
Semicolon came about when author, editor and PhD Danielle Mullen shared her dream of being surrounded by books and art. What's in a name? Danielle told the Chicago Review of Books, "I love the idea of a sentence's ability to continue forward whenever the author so chooses. It's so applicable to other aspects of life, which is what I thought made it perfect for the space I was creating." Danielle uses the store as an asset for budding and self-published authors; if they need to print a manuscript in a pinch, Semicolon is the place to go as it houses an Espresso Book Machine, that prints up to 450 pages in minutes.
Danielle has created a space for artists and authors alike to come and build rapport. Best of all, you can order books online from the Chi-Town store.
Shop Semicolon Chi here.
For The Makeup Maven: Coloured Raine
Coloured Raine
Loraine R Dowdy left a major bag in the financial industry to create Coloured Raine in 2013. She was one of the first brands to be inclusive of all shades and hues. Coloured Raine differs from other beauty brands with its exceptionally made products that also don't put your account in the negative. We are sure the makeup lover in your life would love this as a gift!
Shop Coloured Raine here.
For The Style Maven: Nichole Lynel
Nichole Lynel
Nichole always wanted to be a fashion designer so she used her last to launch her website, Shop Nichole Lynel, to continue to pursue her dreams. She told us earlier this year, "I was always told how hard it was, but I realized the only thing that was really hard was going to work every day and hating it. If it's going to be hard, it might as well be something hard that I actually love. I started at the top floor and knocked on every door until someone told me 'yes'. It took months between the initial idea and the actual launch date. Stepping out on your own is a whole 'nother thing."
The brand is more of a lifestyle than simple clothing options. Nichole's online boutique is what happens when luxury and lifestyle collide. From exclusive pants sets to haute couture dresses, you can find something for every event or avenue in your life.
Shop Nichole Lynel here.
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
Black-Owned Businesses To Show Love To Next Time You're In Harlem
9 More Bomb AF Black-Owned Swimwear Brands
Level Up Your Locks With These 4 Black-Owned Haircare Brands
Black-Owned Businesses To Support The Next Time You're In Memphis
Did you know that xoNecole has a podcast? Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify to join us for weekly convos over cocktails (without the early morning hangover.)
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Joce Blake is a womanist who loves fashion, Beyonce and Hot Cheetos. The sophistiratchet enthusiast is based in Brooklyn, NY but has southern belle roots as she was born and raised in Memphis, TN. Keep up with her on Instagram @joce_blake and on Twitter @SaraJessicaBee.
Devale Ellis On Being A Provider, Marriage Growth & Redefining Fatherhood
In this candid episode of the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker talked with Devale Ellis, actor, social media personality, and star of Zatima, about modern masculinity, learning to be a better husband, emotional presence in marriage, fatherhood for Black men, and leading by example.
“I Wasn’t Present Emotionally”: Devale Ellis on Marriage Growth
Devale Ellis On Learning He Was a ‘Bad Husband’
Ellis grew up believing that a man should prioritize providing for his family. “I know this may come off as misogynistic, but I feel like it’s my responsibility as a man to pay for everything,” he said, emphasizing the wise guidance passed down by his father. However, five years into his marriage to long-time partner Khadeen Ellis, he realized provision wasn’t just financial.
“I was a bad husband because I wasn’t present emotionally… I wasn’t concerned about what she needed outside of the resources.”
Once he shifted his mindset, his marriage improved. “In me trying to be of service to her, I learned that me being of service created a woman who is now willing to be of service to me.”
On Redefining Masculinity and Fatherhood
For Ellis, “being a man is about being consistent.” As a father of four, he sees parenthood as a chance to reshape the future.
“Children give you another chance at life. I have four different opportunities right now to do my life all over again.”
He also works to uplift young Black men, reinforcing their worth in a world that often undermines them. His values extend to his career—Ellis refuses to play roles that involve domestic violence or sexual assault.
On Marriage, Family Planning, and Writing His Story
After his wife’s postpartum preeclampsia, Ellis chose a vasectomy over her taking hormonal birth control, further proving his commitment to their partnership. He and Khadeen share their journey in We Over Me, and his next book, Raising Kings: How Fatherhood Saved Me From Myself, is on the way.
Through honesty and growth, Devale Ellis challenges traditional ideas of masculinity, making his story one that resonates deeply with millennial women.
For the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker peels back the layers of masculinity with candid conversations that challenge stereotypes and celebrate vulnerability. Real men. Real stories. Real talk.
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
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My personal relationship with birth control pills is a bit of an odd one. Back when I first became sexually active (I started having sex with my first boyfriend a couple of months shy of 19), I took them for a couple of months, didn’t like how they made me feel, and so I quit using them altogether (and got pregnant almost immediately after). The rest of my adult life, I stayed off of the pill and pretty much only used condoms (and even then, not consistently — SMDH).
And yet here I am, now, all these years later, back on them again: surprise, surprise.
These days, it's for a completely different purpose, though. Now that I am in the hopefully latter stages of perimenopause (I’m not sure because my mother had a full hysterectomy at 29, her mother died at 53 and I don’t deal with my paternal grandmother because…chile… ) — although I have always had relatively easy cycles and I could definitely set my watch to them, about two years ago, my periods started to show up whenever they felt like it and it was damn near a crime scene once they did.
It was driving me crazy, and so, my nurse practitioner recommended that I take progestin-only pills to shorten, if not completely stop, my cycle: “After a year or so, we can wean off and see if you are entering into menopause on your own.” (Whew, perimenopause, chile.)
Although the first five months of being on this particular pill made me wonder if it was worth it to take this approach, I actually re-upped for another 12-month cycle because the extra progestin (a synthetic form of progesterone) has benefitted me in other areas as well because I am sleeping more soundly and my weight is more stabilized (by the way, when these things are “off,” they are signs of low progesterone levels). However, I did ask my nurse practitioner if, once I do decide to wean off of the pill, would there be any issues.
Her response is what inspired me to write this article because, until she said “post-birth control syndrome” to me, I had no idea there was such a thing. Anyway, if you give me a sec, I’ll explain to you what it is and why you should care if hormone-related birth control is currently a part of your life.
Yes, Post-Birth Control Syndrome Is a Very Real Thing
Okay, so it’s important to always remember that the way that birth control works is it “manipulates” your hormones so that you can significantly reduce your chances of conceiving. This means that taking them could result in some side effects including nausea; weight gain; headaches; irregular periods and/or spotting; increased stress; depression; blurry vision; breast tenderness, and/or a lowered libido.
That said, even though birth control pills are basically 99 percent effective (when taken correctly and consistently), if the side effects that you are experiencing are making you close to miserable, you should absolutely share that with your healthcare provider because…what’s the sense in preventing pregnancy when you don’t even feel up to having sex because you don’t feel good or your sex drive is shot? More times than not, your provider can find you another pill brand or option that will help you to feel more like yourself.
With that out of the way, think about it — if going on the pill can produce side effects, why would going off of it…not? And this is where post-birth control syndrome comes in.
For the most part, it’s what can happen to your body once you decide to come off of birth control. Typically, the symptoms will last anywhere between 4-6 months and, although the symptoms seem to present themselves most intensely as it relates to going off of the pill, any hormone-related birth control (like IUDs, injections, patches, the ring or implants) could produce similar outcomes.
Outcomes like what?
- Irregular cycles
- Breakouts
- Excessive gas and/or bloating
- Weight gain
- Anxiety and/or depression
- Fertility issues
- Migraines and/or headaches
- Shifts in your libido
- Sleeplessness/restlessness
- Hair loss
Whoa, right? And if a part of you is wondering, “Okay, if this is indeed the case, why have I not heard of this syndrome before?” It’s because it’s not a term that conventional method uses nearly as much as alternative medicine does. Still, it makes all of the sense in the world that if your body has to adjust to an uptick in hormonal intake, it would also need to adjust to removing those extra doses of hormones from your system as well. COMMON. DAMN. SENSE.
Anyway, if you were thinking about taking a break from birth control and taking all of this in has you feeling a bit…let’s go with the word “trepidatious” about doing so, I totally get it. There are some things that you can do to make experiencing post-birth control syndrome either a non-issue or a far more bearable one, though.
7 Home Remedies That Can Make Coping with Post-Birth Control Syndrome Easier
1. Take a multivitamin.Something that’s fascinating about what going off of birth control can do is it sometimes has the ability to lower your nutrition levels as it relates to certain vitamins and minerals; this is especially the case when it comes to vitamins B, C, E and minerals like magnesium, selenium and zinc. So, if you don’t currently take a multivitamin, now would be the time to start (along with consuming foods that are particularly high in those nutrients as well).
2. Up your vitamin D intake. Speaking of nutrient levels, a vitamin level that commonly drops after going off of birth control isvitamin D. This is hella critical to keep in mind as a Black woman since many of us tend to be naturally deficient in the vitamin as-is and vitamin D is important when it comes to fighting off diseases, regulating weight and keeping your moods stabilized (for starters). So, make sure that your multivitamin has vitamin D in it. Also make sure to consume vitamin D-enriched foods like fatty fish, eggs, mushrooms, yogurt and fortified orange juice.
3. Drink herbal teas. Since going off of birth control will cause your hormones to be all over the place for a season, consider drinking some herbal teas that will help to stabilize them. Black cohosh contains phytoestrogen properties, Chasteberry can help to level out your prolactin levels and green tea can help your hormones out by helping to balance out your insulin (which can sometimes directly affect them).
4. Keep some ibuprofen nearby. The headaches and migraines? Until those subside, you and ibuprofen are probably going to become really good friends; although I will add that ginger tea and inhaling essential oils like chamomile and lavender can help to ease migraine-related symptoms too.
5. Do some meditating. Waiting for your hormones to get back on track can be stressful as all get out. That said, something that can get your cortisol (stress hormone) levels to chill out is to meditate. If meditation is new for you, check out “7 Meditation Hacks (For People Who Can't Seem To Do It).”
6. Get massages. As if you needed an excuse to get a massage, right (check out “12 Different Massage Types. How To Know Which Is Right For You.”)? However, there is some evidence to back the fact that regular massages (somewhere around once a month) can help to lower your stress, boost your dopamine, increase blood flow and drain your lymphatic system so that you will have more energy.
7. Sleep/rest more. There is plenty of scientific research out here which says that sleep deprivation can throw your hormones out of whack — and since your hormones are already trying to stabilize themselves, you definitely need to get 6-8 hours of sleep and not feel the least bit guilty about taking naps sometimes too.
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Post-birth control syndrome may not be the most pleasant thing about getting off of birth control yet it is manageable. So, now that you know all about it, you can feel more confident about taking a birth control break (or getting off altogether) — without the surprises that can come with doing it. Give thanks.
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