

One of the happiest moments in a woman's life is the day she blessed the world with a kiss of life and gives birth to a baby girl or boy. Unfortunately, this is also the day that she can kiss her sex life as she knew it, goodbye. Motherhood is by far the most transformative change in a woman's life. Along with a newfound body and perspective on life, you adopt a gang of next-level insecurities that have the potential to rob both you and your sex life of all of the orgasms that you so rightfully deserve.
Nikki and Simona, founders of the DMV-based Black motherhood organization, District Motherhued, enlisted the help of sexpert, Jasmine Harris, for the second annual Momference to help moms understand that sex after the delivery room doesn't have to suck.
Jasmine recently slid through for an interview and gave xoNecole the secret to having amazing sex after becoming a mom, and according to her, it all starts with being intentional about self-care. "I realized that it was much harder to enjoy sex with all the responsibilities that we have throughout the day and that made me do some research on how we can enjoy sex and not worry about all the things we have to do tomorrow and be in the moment. That was important to me," she explained.
As a mother of four with a little one on the way, Jasmine expressed that she knows the postpartum sex struggle first hand. She told xoNecole, "Self-care is important and when you've just had a child. You're not fitting into your clothes and you're just not looking like yourself or feeling like yourself. And after your husband has watched you push a human out of your body, you're just like, 'You want to put your face down there?'"
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Over time and with the help of a whole lot of research, Jasmine learned that the problem with her sex life wasn't her postpartum body, but instead was simply an internal conflict that was manifesting externally. Once she made the decision to step up her self-care game, she immediately saw a change in her bedroom.
When you feel good you look good, and vice versa. Jasmine adopted this mentality after giving birth to her youngest child and at this point, she knew it was time to actively make some changes in her life. The sex and relationship expert explained that unlearning negative self-talk can be a challenge, but as we all know, there's no obstacle that's too difficult for a mother on a mission. Jasmine says the next time you want to complain about the new (and often unwanted) lifestyle changes that come with motherhood, choose to rewrite the narrative.
Along with these tips, Jasmine also let us in on a few sex tips that are perfect for new moms and women in general who are looking to get their sexy back after going through a drought:
Slow Down, Mama
So much of our lives are dictated by deadlines and due dates. One of the few things in life that can never be put on a timer is revving up your babymaker after giving birth. Jasmine agreed with this advice and suggested that women take as much time as they need to get back in the saddle, "Take all the time that you need to find yourself again, to find your confidence."
Your man may be staring at you like a freshly baked piece of apple pie on a Sunday afternoon, but just because he's hungry doesn't mean you're automatically obligated to satiate his appetite. Jasmine advised that you take it slow, but also let your partner know what's up so that he doesn't feel isolated or shut out. She advised, "Make sure that you are communicating this with your partner because this can create a lot of resentment [if left] unspoken."
Treat Yo’ Self
After giving birth, you may not feel like it, but sis, you look like bae.
According to Jasmine, "Mommy" is one of the sexiest things you can be in your life, and it's imperative that you remind yourself of that every damn day in order to keep both your sex life and your sanity running on all four wheels, "[Do] whatever makes you feel beautiful. I noticed that when I do take time to get dressed every day to fix my hair, get my nails done, stay up on my feet and stay up on either waxing or trimming. If I'm feeling beautiful for myself, that helps me feel sexier in the bedroom."
Whether that means getting your hair or makeup done or purchasing a brand new freak'um dress, you're doing you and your partner a favor by standing in your own sexy. Jasmine explained, "And I know we say we don't have time, but we have to make time. Make it. Tell whoever has been or whoever will help you, you need to take this child. I'll be back in a few hours because I will feel better and I will function better if I like what I see."
"If I'm feeling beautiful for myself, that helps me feel sexier in the bedroom. And I know we say we don't have time, but we have to make time. Make it."
Try Using Vitamins & Supplements
From time to time, we all need a little boost, and according to Jasmine, this is also true when it comes to certain bedroom activities. After giving birth, your hormones are all topsy-turvy and you feel like you've been given a brand new body from the day they wheel you out of the maternity ward.
Jasmine has a solution to those baby blues that is guaranteed to jumpstart your vagina and offer you the ride of a lifetime. She explained, "There are supplements and vitamins that can assist you in getting your mood back and it assists you and helping your muscles come back like, tighten back up, and they're natural supplements. It helps you gain the moisture back [down] there."
Jasmine recommended IsoSensuals Tight Vaginal Tightening Pills, which are currently available on Amazon; but there are a number of other options that will help get your juices flowing in all the right places.
For Him, Too
Moms carry an insurmountable amount of responsibility and stress when they welcome a new baby into the world, but new dads have it pretty hard too. In the same way that women need time to readjust after having a new baby, men go through their fair share of anxiety as well.
Jasmine explained that it's important to keep this in mind and offer a little help when you see it's needed, "It's important to have open communication with your man. So if you feel like you would want him to have more stamina, [it's] because they are also under a lot of stress and pressure and overwhelmed and that kind of kills their stamina and their energy. Then, we think that it's us and they're afraid to say I'm tired or something's not working right."
As previously stated, there are a number of vitamins and supplements that will help you say goodbye to postpartum anxiety and hello to back-to-back orgasms. The good news is, when you're picking up some of these handy dandy vitamins, you can snag a bottle for your man, too. Jasmine shared, "Both of us, both men and women, we need assistance. Especially when we have so much on in life."
Meditation & Deep Breathing
It's 2019, and by now, everyone should be fully aware of the magical power of deep breathing and meditation. Not only does it lower your stress levels, but according to Jasmine, it can help you achieve stronger orgasms.
Thanks to her practice of mindfulness and meditation, the sex expert says that even though she's reached a peak when it comes to her weight, she doesn't feel any less sexy. "Do some meditating. Learn your body. I'm at my heaviest, but it doesn't bother me. I feel very sexy because I've learned my body after a while and I get turned on by myself. And so when you are turned on by yourself, your partner will not be able to resist you."
A man can't please you unless you know how to please yourself, and after having her last child, Jasmine says that she took time to do exactly that. Luckily, her investment was paid off with interest. "When you are able to master deep breathing and inner peace, you'll be able to focus on every little movement during sex and it will be the most amazing mind-blowing experience each and every time you have sex. It is possible to have an orgasm each and every time."
"Learn your body. I'm at my heaviest, but it doesn't bother me. I feel very sexy because I've learned my body after a while and I get turned on by myself. And so when you are turned on by yourself, your partner will not be able to resist you."
Invest In A Sex Chair
No, we don't mean a chair that you often like to have sex in. A sex chair is an actual thing that will blow your mind and snatch your coins right out of your purse.
Jasmine explained that this functional toy is one of the best investments you'll make in your sex life and is ideal for postpartum moms who may be self-conscious during sex. "[They] are just perfectly made for you to just climb on there and let your man go to work. And again, you're enjoying it, but your body is looking perfect because these chairs are designed to make you look sexy and just position you perfectly."
Forget about making that arch in your back picture-perfect and level up your sex game with this erotic piece of furniture ASAP.
Date Night Is Non-Negotiable
Mama, I know you love your babies. But there comes a time when you must reclaim your tit and remember that it's more than just a milk bag for your little one, and the best way to do that is by planning an intimate date night between you and your partner. Jasmine explained that having four kids is no walk in the park, but she and her man keep their relationship spicy by making date nights mandatory.
"First, you have to remember that before the children got there, it was you two," she explained. "And a lot of people get that misconstrued. They think that that means put your partner first, and in a way it does. But you have to say, 'OK, you guys are kids. We are the adults. We're gonna give you the balance of attention and love and discipline that you need throughout the day. But by this time, y'all going to sleep. And y'all are going to calm down.'"
Making romance and self-care a priority as a mother can never be a bad idea because when you're happy, that energy radiates. This is also true when you're grumpy and in need of some grade-A vitamin D. That's why Jasmine says that along with date night, enforcing bedtimes is a standard in her household that keeps her relationship and her sex life in check. "You have to make it a thing where they know that it is no longer time to interrupt mommy or daddy. Even if you guys just want to watch a movie, they need to know that it's time to respect mommy and daddy's quiet time and it is their bedtime."
Keep up with Jasmine and see all of the coverage from this year's Momference on Instagram!
Keep up with Jasmine and see all of the coverage from this year's Momference on Instagram!
Featured image by Instagram/@mileeju.
- Sex After Birth: Having Sex After A Baby - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
- Mothers Share Real Postpartum Sex Experiences - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
- Postpartum Sex: Tips for Having Sex Again After Baby's Birth | What ... ›
- The best relationship advice my mother ever gave me | The Times of ... ›
- 11 Sex Tips For People In Long-Distance Relationships | HuffPost Life ›
- The Real Deal on New Parent Sex - Tips & Advice | mom.me ›
- 6 Post-Pregnancy Sex Positions for New Moms | Brides ›
- Best Relationship Advice From Mom, Mothers Day 2017 ›
- 5 Reasons Why Moms Shouldn't Take Sex Advice From Magazines – ›
- Sexpert to Answer Questions on Sex – Pune Mirror ›
Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
Your February 2025 Horoscopes Are All About Self-Love & Soulful Alignment
Explore your sign’s 2025 horoscope predictions to learn what is in store for you this year in love, career, and more. Check out the love compatibility of each sign to learn more about zodiac pairings and all things compatibility.
February is a coming together, as a culmination of community and abundance is evident. Some significant planets go direct this month after being retrograde since this past year, and we can finally take a deep breath. We walk into the month in Aquarius season, and the focus during this time is on coming together with the people you resonate with on a soul level, opening your heart to love, and gaining perspective in the process. When the Sun is in Aquarius, everything feels more electrified and inspiring, and this is one of the best months of the year to manifest and set your intentions.On Feb. 4, Venus enters Aries, Jupiter goes direct in Gemini, and the energy and passion return. Venus in Aries is fiery, dynamic, and puts self-love first. While Venus is in Aries for the entire month, February is all about going after the things you want in love, and trusting that you will be supported here. Jupiter goes direct on the same day after being retrograde since Oct. 9, and we can see our blessings manifest more effortlessly now, especially regarding communication matters, networking, short travels, education, and the mind. Jupiter finishes its Gemini transit on Jun. 9, so over the next few months, this is a good time to expand your mind and your vision, get creative, and meet new people.
What February 2025 Has In Store For Your Zodiac Sign
The Full Moon of February occurs in Leo on the 12th, and this is the Snow Moon of the year. This Full Moon brings emotions to the surface and creates self-clarity and honesty in the process. This Full Moon is a time to let go of old versions or ideas of yourself that don’t align with who you are today and to focus on what feels authentic and empowering for you right now.
On Valentine's Day, Mercury enters Pisces until Mar. 3, and the mind is on love right now.
While Mercury is in Pisces, we speak in words of poetry and spirituality, and mental connections turn into romantic ones. This is a beautiful energy to walk into on the day of love, signifying an urge to be around people who truly understand you right now.
Pisces season begins on Feb. 18, and we move into a time of closure, healing, creativity, and introspection. On Feb. 23, Mars goes direct in Cancer after being retrograde here since Jan. 6, and being retrograde in general since Dec. 6. With Mars now direct, there is more energy and direction at our disposal, and less confusion on where to go from here. Mars will be direct in Cancer until Apr. 18, and there is a lot of love, support, and intuition to be felt right now. Mars in Cancer supports others while also cherishing boundaries, and this is a good time to feel more stability in matters of the home and heart.
We end the month with a New Moon in Pisces on Feb. 27, and this is a time of magic, dreams coming to fruition, and romance in the air.
A New Moon in Pisces reminds us that what has been lost always comes back around in a new form, and helps us see what our heart is grateful for right now. This is a great New Moon to set your intentions for the future and to dream the dream. Overall, February is an inspiring and enlightening month, and your heart is the one leading the way right now.
Read for your Sun and Rising Sign below to see what February has in store for you.
ARIES
February is all about love for you, Aries. You are thriving within relationship matters as Venus is in your sign for most of this month. Venus moves into Aries on Feb. 4 and will be here until Mar. 27, however, Venus will be going retrograde in your sign on Mar. 1. So, use February to walk into some new beginnings in love, but remember to take your time with things here as well. You are overall feeling more reciprocity, support, and positive recognition now, and self-love is key this month.
On Feb. 12, we have a Full Moon in fellow fire sign Leo, and this Full Moon occurs in your 5th house of romance.
This is a beautiful Full Moon for seeing love bloom and for experiencing a sense of fulfillment that brings you closer to another. Before the month ends, Mars goes direct after being retrograde in an area of your life having to do with the home, family, close loved ones, and emotional stability. With Mars now direct here, new foundations can be built in your world, and you feel more supported and secure as you end the month.
TAURUS
This month is a time to reflect, accept, and move into your new beginning, Taurus. There is a lot to process this month, and with the Sun in your 10th house for most of February, a lot of your focus right now is on your goals, purpose, and life path. The Full Moon happening mid-month is an opportunity for you to see things clearer in the home, and to create space for more support and nourishment here. You are letting go of what is weighing you down or making your emotional world feel more difficult to process this month.
Mercury enters your 11th house of hope, community, friendship, and manifestation on Valentine’s Day this year, and you move into a time of inspiration. You are thinking of all the things that make you feel empowered, loved, and in tune, and it’s time to create more of this energy around yourself. We have a New Moon in this same area of your chart before the month ends on Feb. 27, and you are ready to look forward in life rather than at the past of what could have been.
Overall, this month is about listening to your heart and spending more time taking care of yourself.
GEMINI
February is a chance to take a break, Gemini. You need more time to process and prepare for what’s ahead of you, and you are taking the time to do so this month. February begins with Jupiter going direct in your sign after being retrograde here since Oct. 9. Jupiter, the planet of blessings, will be direct in your sign until Jun. 9, and won’t be here again for another decade. This is your opportunity to set intentions, focus on your dreams, and make some important achievements happen.
Extra good luck and support from the universe are with you now, and the key for you is to let things come to you naturally through patience and dedication.
On Feb. 12, there is a Full Moon in your 3rd house of communication, and some important culminations are coming through in matters of the mind. You are coming to some conclusions about something, and it’s changing your perspective overall. Before the month ends we have a New Moon in an area of your life having to do with your career, professional world, and reputation, and this is a good time to set your intentions for what goals you want to see through right now.
CANCER
February is a month of enlightenment, Cancer. You are aligned with the path you are walking on right now, and everything is starting to make a little more sense to your heart. This month we have a Full Moon in your 12th house of closure, and you are moving away from an emotionally heavy space. You are letting go of a lot of what has kept you conflicted, and there is a sense of peace that is being obtained in the process. This is your month of inspiring others through your resilience and gift of forgiveness.
Mars goes direct in your sign on Feb. 23 after being retrograde here since Jan. 6. With Mars retrograde in your sign since we began the year, there has been a lot for you to reflect on and emotionally process, and you are seeing yourself and your life with a new perspective and passion. Mars will be in Cancer until Apr. 18, and this is the time to take action on the things that you haven’t been ready to move forward with these past few months. On Feb. 27, we have a New Moon in Pisces, and you are leaving the month in the mood for an adventure.
This is the time to get out of your comfort zone, travel, or do something fun.
LEO
February is about protecting your energy and what you are bringing to fruition in your life, Leo. With a Full Moon in your sign mid-month, you are moving through a time of culmination, release, and inner clarity, and there is a lot to reflect on right now. You are recognizing your need to create boundaries from those who don’t serve you or your life path and are focusing on the things that feel good for you.
With the Sun in your 7th house of love for most of the month as well, you are gaining clarity on the relationships you want to move forward with, and where you need to create more space.
Venus is in Aries and in your 5th house of romance, self-expression, creativity, and joy for most of the month, and your heart is yearning for some excitement. When it comes to love in February, opportunities are coming to the surface for you to get out of your head and into your heart, heed the call. At the end of the month, Mars goes direct in your 12th house of closure, and you are moving into a breakthrough. You end February with less weight on your shoulders and more energy to just be.
VIRGO
Trust your intuition this month, Virgo. February is a month of getting organized, gaining clarity, and feeling purposeful. With Jupiter going direct in your 10th house at the start of the month, blessings follow through regarding your career and professional world. The intentions you have been setting and going over these past few months, are coming to fruition for you now, and you are being recognized and supported for your efforts here. This is a month of feeling a level up in your life, and like you are where you want to be.
Mars goes direct on Feb. 23, after being retrograde in an area of your life having to do with friendship, community, and your hopes and dreams over the past month or so. With Mars now direct in Cancer, it’s easier for you to feel hopeful and to see and experience the magic in life. Before the month ends, we have a New Moon in your sister sign Pisces on Feb. 27, and love takes on a new beginning. This New Moon is one of the best of the year for you to set your intentions for love, and trust where your heart is being called to right now.
LIBRA
February is all about perspective and the intentions you are setting in your life through the thoughts you are thinking, Libra. The Sun is in your house of romance and Venus is in your house of partnership for most of the month, and there is a lot to look forward to right now. New developments are coming to fruition within your relationships, and you are reaping what you have sown, feeling grateful for what has come to fruition for you.
This is a beautiful month for travel, moving forward in your partnerships, and feeling more commitment and support in doing so.
With Jupiter also going direct this month, your home life and foundations see improvements and expansion. Anywhere you have been feeling limited here is being lifted for you now, and you are able to breathe and think bigger about what is possible for you and your sense of stability in life. The Full Moon happening on Feb. 12, is a chance for you to connect with the people who inspire you, and to let go of anything that doesn’t feel authentic to who you are today or how you feel about things.
SCORPIO
February is a month of feeling loved, Scorpio. Everything's coming together for you exactly how you have envisioned it, and with the Sun in your house of family, support, and foundations, you are feeling closer to your loved ones in the process. We have a Full Moon in your 10th house of career in mid-February, and culminations are coming through in your professional world, as recognition for your efforts and hard work are here for you now. This Full Moon is about taking the time to congratulate yourself for how far you have come and to feel gratitude for your progress in life.
On Feb. 23, Mars goes direct in fellow water sign Cancer, after being retrograde in an area of your life having to do with travel, adventure, spirituality, and education over the past month or so. With Mars now direct, travel plans follow through and it’s easier for you to see the bigger picture. The New Moon of the month takes place on Feb. 27, and this is a beautiful time for you to experience joy and pleasure. You are ending the month by making your inner child happy, showing up, and connecting with the love that surrounds you now.
SAGITTARIUS
This month is a transition month for you, Sagittarius. You are moving on from what has been, and a few of you may even be moving physically or traveling during this time. This is a month of getting into new energy and letting things go where it is needed. February begins with your ruling planet Jupiter going direct after being retrograde since last fall, and you are able to experience more of the blessings in love that you have been looking for.
Love turns a new page this month, and it’s because you are no longer settling for things that don’t align with what you want for yourself or your future.
On Feb. 12, a Full Moon is happening in an area of your life that has to do with your passion, inspiration, travel ventures, and perspective, and you are getting the full picture right now. This Full Moon is about accepting the truths that have come to the surface and following through on plans that you have had for yourself. Mars goes direct in your 8th house of transformation on Feb. 23, and you end the month experiencing a personal breakthrough. A lot is changing for you in February, and you are the one leading these efforts forward because you are owning the life you deserve.
CAPRICORN
A new month is here, and you are looking forward to all of the new experiences you are about to get into, Capricorn. February is an inspiring, passionate, and eye-opening month for you and you are making a lot of progress. With the Sun in your 2nd house of finances, values, and self-confidence for most of the month, you are spending a lot of your time developing new plans and intentions for yourself, especially financially. Mid-month we have a Full Moon in your 8th house of shared resources, and the support that you need to thrive and expand financially right now is becoming clearer to you.
Towards the end of the month, Mars goes direct in your sister sign Cancer, after being retrograde in an area of your life having to do with love, partnership, and harmony over the past month or so. With Mars moving forward again, so are you in love, and your relationship dynamics feel a little more balanced and empowered for you. On Feb. 27, we have a New Moon in Pisces to close out the month, and this New Moon for you is all about setting your intentions regarding communication, networking, and the ideas you want to build off of right now.
AQUARIUS
Your season is here, and everything is falling into place for you now, Aquarius. This is a month of feeling a positive culmination of everything you have been working towards, and seeing the rewards for your efforts. With the Sun in your sign until the 18th, all eyes are on you and you are focused on your personal goals, investments, and self-courage. Jupiter goes direct as we begin the month, turning things around for you in love and helping you see things with a new perspective here.
Blessings and understanding within relationship matters bloom for you now, and you can finally take a break from the confusion here.
With Venus in your 11th house of friendship for most of February, this is the month for connecting with the people who you resonate with on a soul level and giving your heart more time to enjoy the company. The Full Moon happening mid-month occurs in your opposite sign, highlighting your romantic life and sense of partnership. Love comes full circle as you let go of the past here and see the gifts of the partnerships you have been building in your life.
PISCES
February is your month of abundance and opportunities, Pisces. There is a lot to tend to this month, but you have the empowerment and passion to do so. Jupiter goes direct in your 4th house as the month begins, and you are feeling stronger foundations emotionally and within the home right now. Progress is being made in the spaces that are close to the heart, and you are feeling the blessings of support and stability in your life. The Full Moon happening on Feb. 12, is about letting go of unhealthy daily routines or habits and giving yourself more space to figure out what feels right for you.
On Valentine's Day this year, Mercury enters your sign, and your mind is focused on love, understanding, and connection. The conversations you are having now are fulfilling your heart and inspiring you, and you are gaining clarity in relationship matters as well. Pisces season officially begins on Feb. 18, and it’s your time to shine, to love, and to be loved in return.
Before the month ends we have a New Moon in Pisces on Feb. 27, and this is one of the best times of the year for you to set your personal intentions, manifest, and reinvent yourself.
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Featured image by Kyra Jay for xoNecole
When you work with couples (especially married ones), you’re gonna hear just about everything (relationship-related) eventually. Here’s what I mean: About six months ago, while in a session with a couple, after asking them both to rate their sex lives on a scale of 1-10, while the wife said “8,” the husband gave a surprising answer. “Well, the sex is like a 9 if you’re talking about intercourse but it’s like a 5.5 overall.” Huh? What does that mean? “She is silent in bed and I hate it. And no matter how much I bring it up, nothing changes.”
After about three sessions, we were able to figure out what was going on. She was self-conscious in that area, plus, she also thought that hearing wasn’t a sense, in sex, that should be a big deal. If you’re on her team, you can check out “How To Incorporate All Five Senses To Have The Best Sex Ever” to grasp why that is absolutely not true. Not only does research tell us that sex sounds can help us to perform better, it can boost our (sexual) self-esteem, help us to communicate pleasure (and sometimes, displeasure) and it can also be a form of reassurance for (and from) your partner.
All of this got me to thinking: although a lot of people do actually enjoy sounds and/or words during sex, out of random curiosity, I wanted to know which ones they are — and why. And so, I got together 12 people (six men and six women) who told me what they enjoy hearing most during coitus. After reading this, please feel free to hop in the comments to share if you can relate — or if other things work for you instead.
*Middle names are used in my interview pieces so that people can speak freely*
1. Haven. 34. In a Serious Relationship.
“Cue Destiny’s Child’s ‘Say My Name,’ girl! There is nothing better than a man being inside of you and saying your name at the same time. There’s a sneaky hack to this too: It’s been my experience that men who don’t say a woman’s name then is because they don’t want to mess up and say her name with some other chick. If he says yours, there’s no one else or he doesn’t care about slipping up. Don’t challenge me on this until you’ve thought it through and tested it out. It has always worked for me.”
2. Nathaniel. 28. Single.
“I never got why people were into porn. Mostly all they are doing is moaning and screaming a lot and even that sounds fake. I like words. Tell me what feels good and what you want more of. Say it in a way that is sexy not like you’re a military instructor. I don’t like silence but if you’re gonna just make sounds and not say anything, I’m not turned on as much.”
3. Xen. 40. Married.
“Cuss words. Dirty, filthy, on-repeat cuss words. It’s funny because I don’t cuss in ‘real life’ at all, so when I first got with my now-husband and I was screaming ‘F-ck me!’, he really didn’t know how to take it. It’s not that I have a problem with cussing. I’ve just always associated it with sex, so that’s where it comes up. I won’t get into what he says back…that’s between us. We’re quite fluent in the swear words and they are excellently positioned during sex, though. Know that.”
4. Douglass. 39. Dating.
“My favorite is to be told how good I taste and to hear how a woman responds when I say the same thing to her. I don’t think women realize how self-conscious it can make us if they turn up their face at the thought of swallowing or if they spit it out in front of us. Imagine if we were that way to you? A woman who is all-in, giving and receiving, with head? She’s a fan favorite.”
Shellie here: This actually reminds me of an Instagram post that I recently watched. It’s, eh, poetic enough that you can probably watch it at work. Umm, I think. LOL. You can check it out here. Oh, and cue Lil Wayne’s “Lollipop” song too.
5. Nori. 29. Dating.
“I don’t know what it is, but any time a man whispers, ‘Whose is it?’, that is going to make me bust right there! He can’t say it; he has to whisper it and, preferably, he needs to do it right when he enters and right before he knows that I’m about to cum. It’s kind of primal in a way. Since I like intense, animalistic sex — that tracks.”
6. Jacob. 27. Engaged.
“The first time I heard a woman say, ‘Pound my p-sssy, n-gga!’, I lost it — yes, ‘it’, right there! If you’re a man who gives even half of a damn, a lot goes through your mind during sex including making sure that you are being as gentle and comfortable as possible. When you come across a woman who doesn’t give a damn about sh-t like that, who wants you to let go and be free — you’re in for a great night. You just might get turned out in the process too.”
7. Vivyca. 43. Single.
“Who doesn’t like to hear how good they feel? Just make sure that you’re as descriptive as you can be. How warm am I? How wet am I? How do I feel on you? Moan and grunt a bit in between your words. Make me understand what I feel like because I don’t know unless you tell me. Is it getting hot in here? Damn.”
8. Keith. 35. In a Serious Relationship.
“I like humming. Hum in my ear. Hum on my ear. Hum on my penis. The sensation of humming is indescribable.”
Shellie here: I did some quick research on this one. According to science, humming improves our mood and feels really good — on the giving and receiving end. So, Keith might just be onto something with this one.
9. Queen. 24. Dating.
“You ever notice how men want to come out of you, right after they nut? That annoys me [insert laughter here]! I was so used to that, that when an ex of mine would hold my hips and say, ‘I’m not ready to leave yet’ — that would sometimes make me have another orgasm. Now I’m trying to figure out how to get other guys to say it. Suggestions?”
10. Erik. 43. Single.
“I’ve been with a few bi and multilingual women in my time. I’m always excited to find that out. A woman who moans in another language? Top-tier sh-t. The accent. The new words. All of it. Nothing has been better in my book yet and I’m middle-aged!”
11. Sloanne. 35. In a Serious Relationship.
“It might sound self-involved but my favorite thing to hear during sex is mostly myself. Damn, now that I said that out loud, it REALLY sounds arrogant but hear me out! I like hearing me enjoy ‘him’. Like when I tell my man that he makes me wet or he gets me to, what’s the word — coo, it arouses me more because it’s almost like I’m not in control of what comes out of my mouth. My job requires that I be hypervigilant with what I say — I just love the vocal release that comes from sex because I can let it all out.”
12. Reid. 30. Married.
“’Mercy sex’ is awful. Men endure it because, if that’s the only way that we’re going to get some — okay. But when you’re just having sex with us to get us to not want to for the next few days, your attitude and energy are going to show it. That’s why I like it when my wife tells me not to cum yet or to stop what I’m doing because she’s not ready to. That means she’s in the moment and doesn’t want to rush. Music to a married man’s ears!”
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Again, I’m always going to believe that…vocal activity during sex is going to make sex better because even reading this had me a little tingly inside. LOL. Seriously, though, the (main) purpose of this was simply to remind you that sex is best when EVERY PART OF YOU is involved. DIY sound effects included.
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