We all see it on social: "Romanticize your life" and having "main character energy." The trend is trending, for sure, and it doesn't seem to look like it'll lose momentum any time soon. And I'm not mad at it. As Black women, we deserve to romanticize any and everything about ourselves and our lives that we want to. You can embrace ways to romanticize your work life that allow you the freedom to enjoy, even when it's part of the job you absolutely hate.
Romanticizing even the most simple parts of our lives is nothing new to Black women. Our favorites, like Maya Angelou, Tracee Ellis Ross, Eartha Kitt, and Beyoncé have all either embodied, talked about, or written about creating big moments out of the minor, and they're always the main character. We know all too well how to normalize being "extra," and we unapologetically do it without even blinking an eye. (The other day, my sister came to the house to braid my hair and I served custom mocktails in my newest eclectic cocktail glasses I found at HomeSense, because, romanticize a kitchen-tician moment, shall we?)
Here are three small but impactful and self-affirming ways to add a little more delight, allure, and joy into your work day:
1. Invest in decorating your space in a way that reflects your true personality and work style.
I find romance in my surroundings, whether it's choosing to go to a chic coffee shop to work or having lunch on an outdoor patio filled with my favorite lush greenery or bright colors. And when it comes to my office space, I have to have inspiration on my walls, in the background sounds, and even in the temperature. I've recently invested in buying vinyl albums with music that keeps my motivation going and the writing juices flowing. (Janelle Monáe'sThe Age of Pleasure is my latest, and it allows me to escape into an alluring playland of spunky confidence and joy.)
Even if it's a cubicle, add an aromatherapy element (within reason and consideration of your office mates). Treat your space to a weekly or monthly bouquet of flowers (or invest in some great faux ones). Include an easy-to-maintain snake plant or a glorious spider plant that you create a routine of watering and nurturing.
Get that new cordless mouse in a neutral or metallic color. Keep dainty notepads and journals around to write Thank-you cards or send birthday greetings to clients, coworkers, or industry friends. Add mood bulbs in your lamps or overhead lighting for creative brainstorming, or a meditative sound machine for in-office breaks.
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2. Make getting dressed for work a time for self-expression and self-care.
I feel much more ready to conquer my work day when taking meetings or even just doing the regular workday things when I'm wearing something not only comfy but chic. I'm not big on fussy fashion so that means, for me, sticking to a uniform of a well-fitting blazer, some casual slacks (or even sweatpants in a luxe or dressier fabric), and either a graphic tee or a tank. When it's cold (which is rare for me because of where I live), I'll throw on a scarf or swap the blazer for a cardigan, coat, or shacket in a bright hue or a print. For shoes, I either wear a pump, sneakers, or strappy sandals.
Put the sweatpants, pajama sets, or ill-fitting throw-ons away and start dressing. It doesn't have to be stressful, too dramatic, or expensive. If your job requires casual wear, take time to invest in quality pieces, a daily routine where your clothing is set the day or week before, and a deliberate step-by-step daily grooming habit that screams luxury in the way you do it (whatever that looks like for your lifestyle and obligations.)
I love creating different combos with the same work outfit formula, and when I can take these items out with ease and take my time putting them on, I don't have to rush through my skincare and haircare routines before starting work.
If you're not into dressing up, that's fine, but still, take the deliberate time to put that athleisure wear together in a way that affirms that you love yourself and you are super-aware that your look is the first impression people get before you even utter a word. Embrace your body type, so-called "flaws" and all, and wear things that make you feel refreshed, empowered, and confident.
Find ways to take the stress out of dressing, like getting a stylist, sticking to a capsule wardrobe, or allowing your favorite fashion influencer to do all the work for you. If you find that working from home has you a bit lazier and indifferent when it comes to grooming and getting dressed, start dressing to go to a co-working space, coffee shop, or park at least once per week.
3. Date yourself...as a job candidate who is somewhat taken but is open to other options.
I remember those fun days of the "roster," where I'd date multiple men and keep my options open simply because I just wasn't going to let anybody's son Reesa Teesa me into commitment. What was fun about this was the pressure was off, I could enjoy different personalities and experiences, and I could have fun in the process of finding the "one." (When I met my current man of seven years, I was dating three guys who I had to cut off once I fell in love. And to add context, just because you're dating someone, doesn't mean you're sleeping with them. Sad I have to note that, but just looking at the Black love and dating conversations being had in these Internet streets, I feel I must.)
The same way you'd have an adventure, keeping your options open while dating, is the same thing you can do being a 9-to-5 professional. It's an adventure that might boost your motivation and joy in working.
Just because you like your current job doesn't mean you shouldn't be shooting your shot at other places, especially if you're not 100 percent satisfied or are looking to advance. Within reason, this is a great way to explore what's fresh and new in the job market, what employers are looking for today, and what other wonderful career adventures are out there that you might be missing while you're comfortable at your current job. Be sure to know your company policies, use discretion, and only agree to interviews with companies that allow you to level up via travel opportunities, a higher salary, or more fulfillment.
If interviewing at other companies isn't your thing, try taking on a fun side hustle, where you can place your passions that don't fit your job per se, into something else. Enjoy the ride of building something from scratch, seeing it flourish, trying new skills, and meeting new people.
As with all things, we should find joy in our careers and the paths we're taking to fulfill our highest dreams.
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- Black Women On The Soft Life Routines They're Unapologetically Cultivating ›
- 'Holistic Mami' Arielle Simone On How To Romanticize Your Life ›
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Taurus Season is in full bloom, and on May 7 the Moon will be joining the Sun for the New Moon in Taurus. This New Moon is an opportunity for luxury, self-care, stability, and harmony.
When the Moon is in Taurus, we are guided towards taking care of ourselves more, and this is a good time to set your intentions for where you want to experience more ease, love, and TLC in life. This New Moon will be a powerful time for manifestation, so make sure you are focused on what you want to create in your life right now. Mercury then moves out of Aries and into Taurus on May 15th, and perspectives move into the energy of more logic, patience, and practicality.
Mercury in Taurus brings the focus to your finances as well, and this is a good time to ask for a raise or promotion, take care of finances, or build your assets.
What May 2024 Has In Store For Your Zodiac Sign
Gemini Season makes its debut on May 20 this year, and the Sun moving into these air signs makes the energy a little lighter and playful, and by the end of the month, people are looking to have some more fun. With a Full Moon in Sagittarius happening a few days later on May 23, the end of May is an exciting, eye-opening, and adventurous time. The Sagittarius Full Moon is the Flower Moon of the Year, and it’s time you receive yours.
Venus moves into Gemini on May 23 as well, and during this time, relationship matters can feel a little more all over the place. However, this is also a more social, charming, and dynamic time for love as well. While Venus is in Gemini, remember that communication is key, and a more open-minded and flexible approach to matters of the heart is needed.
One of the most important transits of the year happens as May comes to an end, and that is Jupiter's move into Gemini. Jupiter has been in Taurus for the past year, helping us grow and get the full picture when it comes to your stability, relationships, and finances, and Jupiter's move into Gemini brings things into focus when it comes to your self-expression, communication, connections, and joy in life.
Jupiter will be in Gemini from May 25, 2024, to June 9, 2025, and this is the perfect opportunity to connect with your creative genius and meet new people with whom you resonate. May, overall, has a lot of potential for opportunity, insight, and collaboration, and this is the perfect month to set your intentions for the future while also living in the moment with the people you love and who inspire you.
Read for your sun sign and rising sign below to see what May 2024 has in store for you.
Kyra Jay for xoNecoleARIES
May is a coming-together month for you, and things are starting to make more sense after Mercury retrograde in your sign for most of last month. You are getting more time within your relationships and close partnerships right now, and the New Moon on May 7, happening in your 2nd house, is when this connection, love, and stability begin to come in for you. You have been asking yourself the important questions and are ready to break ground and create the new beginnings you see for yourself.
With Mars in your sign for the entire month of May, you have a lot of energy and passion at your disposal right now, and you are making things happen for yourself. This is a good time for feeling connected to your body and for seeing positive results regarding your health. Jupiter moves into your house of communication at the end of the month where it will be for the next year, and you are moving into a time of more grace, understanding, and opportunity for self-expression right now, Aries - own your voice.
Kyra Jay for xoNecoleTAURUS
The Sun is in your sign, and you are shining authentically in who you are, Taurus. May is a beautiful month for growth and a time when you are finding your balance between letting go of the past and remaining true to yourself in the present. The New Moon of the month is happening in your sign on May 7, signifying a time of new beginnings for you and when it comes to your goals in life and your sense of freedom.
Be confident in your desires, and know yourself, Taurus. With all the manifestations that are coming forth for you this month, clarity is one of them.
Mercury enters your sign on May 15, and this is a time of positive communication, connection, and gaining some new wisdom. With Mercury in your sign, be prepared for some extra communication on your hands as people are looking to hear your perspective. Jupiter moves out of your sign and enters Aries on May 25 after being in Taurus for the past year, and the luck you have been experiencing in life transfers to your finances, income, and value systems. Overall, you are finding your way and making sense of it all this month.
Kyra Jay for xoNecoleGEMINI
May is a time of rebirth for you, Gemini. You are in a good head space this month now that your ruling planet, Mercury, is officially out of retrograde and direct again. This is a powerful month for you when things are turning around for you and some extra good karma and luck are coming your way. With the Sun in your 12th house for most of May, you are getting an opportunity to renew and heal from the past and to gain some new understanding of where you have been in life and what you want to create moving forward.
Gemini Season begins on May 20, and it’s your time to shine! Gemini Season this year is a month full of opportunity and clarity, and you are bringing your best self forward. There is a Full Moon on May 23 in your opposite sign, Sagittarius, and love matters are coming full circle for you now so that you can let go of old belief systems that don’t serve you or your relationships anymore. Your most important astrological transit of 2024 happens at the end of the month on May 25, as Jupiter enters your sign for the next year. Jupiter in your sign signifies good luck, fortune, and personal success in your future.
Kyra Jay for xoNecoleCANCER
This month is about finding your balance, manifesting, and working together with others, Cancer. It’s about choosing peace and trusting your intuition right now to guide you forward. The Sun is in your 11th house in May, and you are thinking of the big picture and not letting anything get in the way of your vision or purpose. There is a New Moon at the start of the month in this area of your chart, and your power of manifestation is especially strong this month, so make sure you are following your true North and setting the intentions that feel right for you internally.
On May 23, Venus enters your 12th house of endings and closure, and love is about moving on and moving into more healing and emotionally receptive experiences. Relationship matters are moving through a transformation now, and you are learning a lot through your partnerships, both old and new, this month. There is a Full Moon on May 23 as well, and this Full Moon will be bringing up old work, projects, and intentions; it’s time to congratulate yourself for your successes and how far you come, as others will want to support you more right now as well.
Kyra Jay for xoNecoleLEO
Over the next month, you are getting the opportunity to stand your ground, speak up for yourself, and claim your space, Leo. This month is about being your biggest cheerleader and seeing yourself in the way you wish others to see you. The Sun is in your 10th house for most of May, and you are focused on taking action and going after your dreams right now. The New Moon on May 7 is a good time to set your intentions for said goals and dreams and to really believe in yourself.
On May 23, there is a Full Moon in fellow fire sign Sagittarius, happening in an area of your chart that has to do with your happiness, romance, creative self-expression, and overall joy for life. You are getting the full picture of where your priorities are or need to be, and are bringing more attention to the things that are going to truly make you happy and fulfilled at the end of the day. Jupiter enters Gemini on the same day where it will remain until 2025, and this move is expanding things for you when it comes to your friendships, community, and social networks.
Kyra Jay for xoNecoleVIRGO
May is a month of connecting with your soul and creating harmony in your life, Virgo. You are moving into a time of greater freedom and authenticity, and May is a good month for travel for you. With a New Moon in Taurus at the beginning of the month, you are expanding your horizons and gaining some much-needed inspiration. This is the time to do things differently and to not be afraid to take risks, and a leap of faith in yourself. You are feeling a little more optimistic in May, and this is creating an opening in your life.
On May 23, we have a Full Moon in your 4th house of home and family, and this is a good time for experiencing closure in this area of your life, and like things are coming full circle for you here. The first half of the month is all about adventure, and the second half of May, you are looking to build in your stability. Jupiter moves into your 10th house of career and success before the month ends, and you enter a year-long transit that will be positively influencing and expanding your reputation and goals in life.
Kyra Jay for xoNecoleLIBRA
May is an opportunity to learn, inspire, and spend some more time with the people who bring this energy out of you, Libra. The month begins with Pluto going retrograde in your 5th house of love, and you need some more time to grasp what is going on in your heart and how you can find your power in life here more. There is a lot to learn and discover this month, and the New Moon on May 7 will be an eye-opening and transformative moment for you where you can dive deep into your love life and commitments and see where a new beginning may be necessary.
There is a Full Moon happening later in the month and this Full Moon will be bringing forth spiritual guidance into your life. This is a Full Moon to connect, communicate, and share your insights and ideas with others. On May 25, Jupiter enters Gemini and moves into your 9th house of adventure, and you are entering a year of travel, enlightenment, spirituality, and higher education. Your mind is your gift right now; trust you have everything you need to experience greatness and be open to meeting new people who will help you get there.
Kyra Jay for xoNecoleSCORPIO
This month is about remaining open and receptive to what is possible for you and your future, Scorpio. You are in a good space to receive your due blessings and rewards, but your heart must be open to receive them. Your ruling planet, Pluto, goes retrograde at the start of the month on May 2, and this Pluto retro transit will allow you to rebuild your vision for the home, and help you figure out where you can bring more of yourself into your surroundings.
A lot of the energy of the month is in your opposite sign, Taurus, meaning it’s in your love and partnership zones.
May is one of the most significant months of love for you out of the year, and the intentions you set for your relationships on the New Moon this month will be creating magic in your love life for the rest of the year. On May 23, there is a Full Moon in the sign just after yours, bringing attention to your finances, income, and self-confidence in it all. The end of May is a time to focus a little more on your stability in life and to take a look at your finances. This is a good time to clean your purse or wallet, create some feng shui, and go over your assets.
Kyra Jay for xoNecoleSAGITTARIUS
Your guidance for the month is to go with the flow and trust your instincts, Sagittarius. The New Moon happening on the 7th is a new door opening for you, your health, and your daily routine, and you are focused on what is going to be best for you and your well-being overall. You are trusting your next steps ahead and remaining grounded with where things are in the meantime. It’s all about trust right now and how much of it you can have for yourself.
The Full Moon of the month will be in your sign on May 23rd, and this is a powerful Full Moon for you of closure, clarity, and self-confidence. You are letting go of what doesn’t resonate with who you are now and what you want to expand in your life. This is a good time to say your affirmations, meditate, and get out of your own head. Before the month ends, your ruling planet, Jupiter, enters your opposite sign, Gemini, and your love life gets an extra boost of good luck right now. Jupiter will be in your 7th house of partnership until 2025, and you are entering a year of harmony, Sagittarius.
Kyra Jay for xoNecoleCAPRICORN
Abundance is your birthright, and you are tapping into this energy this month, Capricorn. May is a month full of opportunities for you, and a lot of this good juju is coming through for you romantically right now. The Sun is in your 5th house of the heart for most of the month, and there is a New Moon here on May 7 as well.
At the beginning of May, make sure you are focused on communicating clearly, owning your passions in life, and having some more fun with love and the romance that wants to bloom for you here.
With Mercury entering your 5th house on May 15 as well, you could be receiving a surprise message or be having some interesting conversations right now that switch things up for you in love. On May 25, Jupiter moves into an area of your chart having to do with your health, lifestyle, and work life, and you are overall going to be coming into balance more here and experiencing some fortunate opportunities at work and within your daily routine. Overall, May is a month that is setting you up for success, Capricorn.
Kyra Jay for xoNecoleAQUARIUS
May is an opportunity for you to connect, move forward, and learn more about yourself and your heart, Aquarius. You are paying attention to the signs right now and making sense of things that may have gone past you before. With Pluto going retrograde in your sign as the month begins on May 2, you are someone who will be moving through a journey of self-discovery for the rest of the year and will be figuring out where your true power is in life and how to hone in on it more.
The New Moon in Taurus on May 7 is a new beginning for you and your home life, and a lot of this month will be about finding those people and spaces that feel like home to you and that make you feel supported in who you are. Jupiter enters a fellow air sign on May 25, and Jupiter in Gemini brings in a year ahead of romance, creativity, confidence, and finding your joy. Things are shifting big time in your life right now, but you are figuring out what works for you and what doesn’t.
Kyra Jay for xoNecolePISCES
It's time to protect your energy and create boundaries where needed, Pisces. May is a month of checking in with yourself and emotionally regulating before moving forward. Pluto goes retrograde at the start of the month and will be retrograde in your 12th house of closure, secrets, and healing until October. What this means for you is a chance at clarity of the heart, but this transit can also bring up old issues or power struggles of the past. Remember to learn from past experiences and decide for yourself today how you want things to go for you from here.
There is a Full Moon in Sagittarius on May 23, and being a mutable sign like Sagittarius, you can tap into the potential of this Full Moon effectively. This is the time to turn a page within your career or professional world and see some resolution here. Before the month ends Jupiter enters your house of home, family, and history, and you are going to be opening your mind on these matters over the next year. You could be expanding the home, moving, or experiencing a deep sense of healing here now.
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Featured image by Kyra Jay for xoNecole
