How To Find Your Personal Style: 12 Tips For Defining Your Aesthetic
Finding your personal style seems like an easy feat, but start the journey and you’ll soon find it overwhelming with minimal initial reward. Since style is so intricately tied to the type of person you are, it evolves and changes as you do. The uncomfortable truth is, it can take years to cultivate and perfect your personal style. But that shouldn’t stop you from honing in on what you like and replicating that in your wardrobe.
It can seem like an arduous task, especially in a trend-crazed industry like fashion, but I promise it’s not. To help start your journey, I asked four wickedly talented stylists for advice and tips on finding your personal style.
Rasheena
"My journey to my personal style began in my teenage years as an act of rebellion. I experimented with opposing colors and patterns in this stage. However, my love deepened in my college years when I was able to wear clothes other than the 'required uniform.' I fell in love with aesthetics at this stage; the grunge, preppy, urban, and chic aesthetics literally stole my heart. As I developed in life, I found that my style constantly changed based on my personality and perception of life.
"If I had to describe my style right now, I would call it freedom. I freely explore all style aesthetics that excite me while staying true to my core aesthetics, or vibe as I call it; grunge, urban, chic and preppy. My style is my safe space to explore myself as a person and online shopping is my favorite destination for exploration."
Her Top Tips for Finding Your Style:
- Identify three character traits you'd like to embody.
- Find three stores that complement your body type and style desires.
- Try on everything that makes you uncomfortable! (It may surprise you!)
Derria
"I would like to attribute finding my personal style to my grandma. I grew up spending summers with her and we would always go to the mall and shop until we were absolutely tired. She also is one of the most stylish people I know and she owns it. She always gets tons of compliments when she is out and about and I've always admired that about her. I basically followed in her footsteps when it comes to my personal style.
"Throughout my childhood and adulthood, my style changed so much. I went from wearing matching plastic jewelry and Jordans to vintage jewelry and graphic tees with my favorite flats; all the way up until now my style is comfy chic. I will most definitely be wearing sneakers but I wear what is comfortable to me. Maybe that's a skirt or a jumpsuit. Then I add my own twist or edge to it. I love my style!"
Her Top Tips for Finding Your Style:
- Wear what you want! Don't worry about what other people think. Not your friends, family, or strangers. Wear what you feel comfortable in!
- Be open to trying new trends and/or starting your own! You never know who will be inspired by your style.
- Own it. People can definitely tell when you are uncomfortable with what you're wearing. So when you drape those clothes on your skin, make sure you OWN IT.
Malak
"I've always had a love for fashion but my true journey started when I was in college. It was a time that I became more expressive in my overall appearance and how I was feeling. I just felt so liberated! I would describe my style as being a girly tomboy. I love to wear heels and dress up but I also love a good t-shirt and sneakers. After my college experience came to an end, I began to take more risks with my style. I love to play around in color, stand out, but also be effortless and relaxed when needed.
"It's funny as I am talking about it, it truly makes sense that my personal style has continued to elevate and grow as I am growing into the woman that I am called to be. My style is only an expression of who I am today: I'm bold, unique, authentic, a risk-taker, and confident. My style will only continue to evolve as I evolve in this life. I'm fully embracing change and I am not afraid to step outside of the box."
Her Top Tips for Finding Your Style:
- Be authentic, be you! God makes us one of one and you should fully embrace that there is nobody like you. Your style should reflect you and only you.
- Designer is NOT style. Fashion is trendy and style is timeless. Style is your aesthetic choices: how you pull your overall look together down to the hair and outfit of choice.
- Be a risk-taker in the way that you think about your style. I truly believe that my best work with my clients has been taking risks instead of playing it safe. When you take risks with something as simple as your outfit, you naturally become more confident.
Tiffany
"I started off wearing my sisters' hand-me-downs but knew I wanted to dress in a way that expressed specifically who I am and what I knew looked right on me. So, I began to think about my body type and the clothing pieces that complemented my frame and found stores that sold pieces that worked for me. I started experimenting and eventually found what stuck. and what best mirrored my personality! Eventually, I started studying other body types and what pieces worked for them and began my personal styling journey, helping women dress for their body types and best express themselves."
Her Top Tips for Finding Your Style:
- Hire a stylist for an expert analysis of what style best reflects your style goals.
- Ask yourself questions about how you want to present to the world, and what clothing items best make that statement.
- Explore what clothing pieces make you feel most comfortable and like yourself.
Featured image by @tiffanystyledit/Instagram
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Courtney is a contributing writer, based in Puerto Rico by way of Tennessee. Interested in the intersection of fashion and culture, she has an affinity for fashion, empowerment, and really good tacos. Keep up with her on Instagram (@hautecourtxo).
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Rihanna Talks Shedding Expectations And Finding Balance As A Mother
Since becoming a mother in 2022, Rihanna has defined parenthood by her terms and hopes to pass that sense of autonomy on to her children.
For Vogue China’s April cover story, Rihanna shared her perspective on raising her two sons with A$AP Rocky, and how she hopes to preserve her children’s uniqueness, devoid of societal expectations.
"The most beautiful thing...is that [children] come into the world with their own individuality and sincerity, without any logic or conformity,” she told the publication. “Which usually makes you feel that you must fit into a certain group."
The “Work” artist, known for her trendsetting style and captivating persona, expressed her desire to support children in fully embracing their individuality and encouraging them to be whoever they want to be. "It's really beautiful to see and I want to continue to help them navigate that and make sure that they know they can be whoever they want to be,” she says.
She continues, “They should embrace it completely, because it's beautiful, and it's unique. I love them just that way."
From shattering music charts to shaking up the beauty industry, Rihanna has forged a path that has since created the “dream” life we see today. One that she says has made her parents proud of.
“I’m living my dream,” she continued. “My parents were very proud of that because they just wanted me to be happy and successful. So, I think the key thing is to find some kind of balance. Yes, balance is important. Do this and you get the best of both worlds. You can write your own life the way you want, and it will be beautiful. Sometimes, you just need to let go of everyone’s expectations and start living your own story.”
Rihanna, who shares sons, RZA, 23 months, and Riot, 8 months, with rapper A$AP Rocky, recently shared her vision for expanding her family in the future in Interview Magazine.
When stylist Mel Ottenberg asked about the number of additional children she hoped to have, Rihanna replied, "As many as God wants me to have.”
"I don't know what God wants, but I would go for more than two. I would try for my girl,” she adds. “But of course, if it's another boy, it's another boy."
Featured image by Neil MockfordWireImage