This article is in partnership with Hallmark Channel's Countdown to Christmas.
Bells are ringing and chestnuts are roasting, signaling to the world that it's that time of year again. And though the way we approach the holidays looks a little different this year, it doesn't change the fact that Christmas is a time to highlight the love in our lives: our family, our friends, and our significant others. 2020 in particular has meant finding the silver linings in all areas of life, and that includes the way we approach our wedding planning.
While the pandemic could have very well prevented engaged couples from jumping the broom and saying "I do" for another year, a beautiful pivot has occurred where couples are opting for intimate weddings over larger ceremonies. Such an action has emphasized the importance of the when and where of getting married over the who and how. Love is truly all you need in life's grander scheme.
The when and where of wedding planning is touched on in Hallmark Channel's latest holiday movie, premiering this Saturday (December 5 at 8pm/7c), Christmas in Evergreen: Bells Are Ringing. A part of Hallmark Channel's Countdown to Christmas, this film stars Holly Robinson Peete and Rukiya Bernard and centers around Michelle (played by Peete) and Hannah (played by Bernard). Michelle's wedding is on the horizon, while Hannah is preparing the Evergreen museum for its launch. Amid the excitement and the chaos of the two auspicious events, Hannah finds herself questioning if the love she has for Elliot (played by Antonio Cayonne) can withstand a new challenge.
'Tis the season and in celebration of the film and the theme of love conquers all, even amid wedding planning, we spoke to real-life couples about their wedding planning pivot, why they chose the spaces they wed in, and the way the holiday has changed and not changed in 2020.
Cynthia “Onye” Onyejiji & Lawrence Edem
Courtesy of Cynthia "Onye" Onyejiji
When They Said "I Do":
September 19, 2020
Where They Said "I Do":
"All my life, I dreamed of having this over the top, Disney-love-story type wedding. I had a Pinterest board full of all my dress ideas. I had my Spotify playlist locked and loaded. I was ready! Then the pandemic happened and momentarily shattered my dream!
"However, Lawrence and I quickly pivoted. We decided to have a 40-guest count wedding, instead of a 500-guest count. And we celebrated our love in the backyard of my childhood home. The home where I spent all those nights dreaming of my over the top, Disney-love story type of wedding! It didn't all unfold exactly how we planned, but I sure did still feel like Cinderella (the Brandy version)!"
Why They Decided To Pivot Their Wedding Plans:
"Lawrence and I are all about saving our coins, mmkay! So when we had to decide between a small wedding now or a big wedding later, it was a no-brainer. Not only were we able to save a lot of money by having an intimate wedding, but we were also able to begin our married lives together pretty quickly. I planned our wedding in just two months and it turned out to be everything I never knew I needed."
Courtesy of Cynthia "Onye" Onyejiji
"Not only were we able to save a lot of money by having an intimate wedding, but we were also able to begin our married lives together pretty quickly. I planned our wedding in just two months and it turned out to be everything I never knew I needed."
The Benefits Of Having An Intimate Wedding:
"Before the pandemic hit, we were spending a lot of time, money and energy on planning this big wedding. It was extremely stressful. Once we decided to go with a smaller wedding, it allowed us to focus more on what really mattered to us. And what mattered to us was saying 'I do' and starting the rest of our lives together."
Their Favorite Holiday Traditions:
"This year, Lawrence and I are looking forward to celebrating our very Christmas together as a married couple. Usually, for the holidays, we'd exchange gifts and spend time with all of our family. However, due to the pandemic, we won't be able to celebrate with our family, so we're looking forward to starting our very own traditions and hopefully one day sharing them with our children."
Their Biggest Love Lesson Of 2020:
"The one thing that the pandemic will never be able to cancel is love. Our story is proof of that!"
For more of Onye, follow her on Instagram @piecesofonye and on YouTube.
Cara Thibodeaux & Harley West
Courtesy of Cara Thibodeaux
When They Said "I Do":
November 22, 2020
Where They Said "I Do":
"We were married at Chapel Dulcinea in the Texas Hill Country of Austin. We decided to elope after learning that the venue was totally free!"
Why They Decided To Pivot Their Wedding Plans:
"At the beginning of 2020, we planned our wedding for 2021 in Hawaii to bring our family and friends back to the island of Oahu where we got engaged. Unfortunately, there have been many restrictions in regards to traveling to Hawaii from the mainland so we decided to push our wedding back to 2022 to allow more of our friends and family to come to our wedding. We got the crazy idea over the summer after we decided to push our wedding back to have a small elopement ceremony with our immediate family."
The Benefits Of Having An Intimate Wedding:
"We kept the decorations minimal, the guest list was our immediate family, and we broke tradition by helping each other get ready with each other the day of our ceremony. We feel that an elopement ceremony allowed us to focus on each other more than the event itself and we are so glad we did!"
Their Favorite Holiday Traditions:
"Every Christmas we make vegan sugar cookies together and it's always so much fun to bake together. We also buy matching Christmas pyjamas to wear on Christmas Eve. Now that we are husband and wife, I don't think those traditions will change but we are excited to hopefully have a little one soon to enjoy the festivities with!"
The Biggest Love Lesson Of 2020:
"Being at home with your significant other almost 24/7 really shows you if you are fit to be married. We've become even closer during these crazy times of 2020, had more meaningful conversations, and without the influence of other friends and family around us all the time, we've been able to define how we want our marriage to look like, what kind of parents we want to be, and what type of life we want to live."
For more of Cara, follow her on Instagram @greatfullgirl.
Anika Joseph-Henry & Marvin Henry
Courtesy of The Henrys, #HenryThingIsPossible
Photo Credit: Kevin Warren
When They Said "I Do":
October 23, 2020; "The three-year anniversary of our first date."
Where They Said "I Do":
"Fortunately for us, our plans remained the same from our August 28th engagement to the October 23rd wedding. Our ideal location was Central Park, since this was the same location where we had our first date on the same exact date (October 23, 2017). Recreating the intimacy of our first date on our anniversary couldn't have been any more beautiful. We would also say that COVID made it easier for us to break the news of an intimate wedding to our guest."
Why They Decided To Pivot Their Wedding Plans:
"Having an intimate wedding was always the plan. From early on in our relationship, everything we did was intentional. Marriage was already a plan, but having a big wedding wasn't ever something that we wanted to do. We knew it was time, and once engaged, we saw it fit to marry right away."
Courtesy of The Henrys, #HenryThingIsPossible
Photo Credit: Kevin Warren
The Benefits Of Having An Intimate Wedding:
"Marriage was always a goal. We moved as a unit in just about everything we do and knowing that we didn't want to have a huge wedding made planning an intimate ceremony even easier during COVID. Additionally, our joint decision to have an intimate wedding came from the very idea of 'not wanting to put more thought into a wedding than the MARRIAGE.' Plus, larger weddings do not necessarily translate to a perfect marriage, okurr!"
Their Favorite Holiday Traditions:
"The holiday season have always been about family for us. Since our shared love language is quality time, we take advantage of any time-off opportunities to have dedicated family time. As a tradition, we both enjoy having at-home gatherings and entertaining family and friends. 2020 will limit our plans of having folks over, but it's a tradition we started when we met and will continue."
Their Biggest Love Lesson Of 2020:
"Love is something that is imperfect. But you must work at it and being intentional with the ones you love is so important. We're living through times that none of us have experienced in this lifetime. This is the time to make sure you keep your loved ones close and be sure that they know it."
For more of The Henrys, follow Anika on Instagram @madam_anni and Marvin @dimeana_rips.
Kendall Keith & Rob Newell
Courtesy of Kendall Keith and Rob Newell
Photo Credit: Gin and Sake, shot at the Cosmopolitan Hotel of Las Vegas
When They Said "I Do":
November 20, 2020
Where They Said "I Do":
"Originally, we had plans to be married soon-ish (like in a few years) in Hawaii (ideally). Our actual plan this year was just to have a big engagement earlier back in July on our 10-year anniversary, but because of COVID, we had to use those savings (that was for my engagement ring) so we could survive the first few months being in financial uncertainty while adjusting to the changes of the pandemic.
"Because of this, our ideal engagement and marriage plans went on hold indefinitely, which made me rethink over time what it means for us to get married. I then decided to forego the engagement all together and tie the knot, just the two of us. No one else there. Because we can't travel, we figured the best alternative to a 'destination elopement' was to run (drive) off to Vegas!"
Why They Decided To Pivot Their Wedding Plans:
"We've always been a little unconventional and had teetered with the idea of having some sort of small wedding or destination elopement, and while we never had any concrete wedding plans prior (other than we planned to marry someday), COVID just somehow solidified what marriage means for each for us, as opposed to getting caught up with the idealization of a perfect wedding/elopement."
Their Favorite Holiday Traditions:
"You know, we've been living together for nine years, and funnily enough, we don't have big holiday traditions! The closest we have to a tradition is watching Die Hard on Christmas Day every year (this started as a direct rebuttal to my husband's family's yearly ritual of having A Christmas Story on 24/7 on Christmas day, haha). As to how it will evolve as a married couple and the times we're now in, I think any traditions we take on will just have that much more meaning in appreciating the people we have in our lives and spending time with them, whenever we are allowed to again."
Their Biggest Love Lesson Of 2020:
"The biggest takeaway I've learned is that at the end of the day, when we all leave this world behind, is that all we have is the people we know and love and how we treat them. Our family and friends. And the times we get to spend with them are precious, because this year has taken a lot of that away for most of us."
For more of The Newells, follow Kendall on Instagram @kendall.keith and Rob @robbien38.
Nakia & Andrew Means
Courtesy of Nakia and Andrew Means
Photo Credit: Kendal Lanier/Champagne Love Stories
When They Said "I Do":
2020
Where They Said "I Do":
"In my parents' living room [in] Atlanta, GA. Our original venue was the Biltmore Ballrooms. It was the first and only venue we visited. We were in love with the classic look! The ceilings reminded me of the Louvre museum in Paris, France. Although we did not get to get married there, my parents went above and beyond to transform our home. They assembled a floral arch, floating candles and a draped backdrop. They have huge windows in their living room which made for beautiful lighting in the pictures. Many people who saw our pictures thought we got married in a cathedral!"
Why They Decided To Pivot Their Wedding Plans:
"We both realize this is a very sensitive decision for each couple, and it will look different from ours for many. While we were looking forward to the big celebration with our family and friends, we just could not wait to start our lives together. There was a little uncertainty about moving forward without all of our friends and family present. However, the longer we are married, the more confirmation we receive that we made the right decision. I cannot imagine 2020 without getting to marry my best friend!"
Courtesy of Nakia and Andrew Means
Photo Credit: Catherine Cansler Photography
"More than having a wedding, we really wanted to start our lives together. The joy we have experienced living life together as husband and wife far outweighs the sting of changing our original plans."
The Benefits Of Having An Intimate Wedding:
"More than having a wedding, we really wanted to start our lives together. The joy we have experienced living life together as husband and wife far outweighs the sting of changing our original plans. We had to condense our wedding guest list down from 200 guests to 10. Needless to say, only our parents and siblings were present. Many of our guests were disappointed, but everyone understood. We opted not to broadcast the wedding via Zoom or any other platform to preserve the intimacy of the ceremony."
Their Favorite Holiday Traditions:
"We love visiting the Botanical Gardens in Atlanta, GA to see their Christmas lights display. I also love watching Christmas movies. Drew typically just plays along, as he would rather watch re-runs of Fresh Prince of Bel-Air! The wonderful thing about Christmas this year is the fact that we get to experience it in our home, together! We have our tree decorated and we've also taken some Christmas pictures to send out our first Christmas card to friends and family. Drew insists this is a sign we are getting old!
"As we navigate COVID-19 during this holiday season, the main change in our plans will be around visiting extended family. We plan to reserve that for another time. With immediate family, we plan accordingly to get tested prior to holidays for everyone's safety. It just gives us peace of mind before going into their homes. Our parents appreciate it too!"
Their Biggest Love Lesson Of 2020:
"I think our lesson can be summed up with one of our favorite songs - 'Can You Stand the Rain' by New Edition! The male group sings, 'Sunny days, everybody loves them. But tell me baby, can you stand the rain?' When the cute Instagram posts are done and the honeymoon is over, what matters is our ability to work together as a team when challenges come. The way we navigated the change in plans, challenges with vendors, financial decisions and other stresses from COVID-19 validated that we are built to withstand tough times together."
For more of The Means, follow Nakia on Instagram @kiatastic and Andrew @by_any__means. You can also subscribe to their YouTube Channel, This Means Love.
Don't forget to watch the premiere of Christmas in Evergreen: Bells Are Ringing on Hallmark Channel this Saturday 12/5 at 8pm/7c!
Featured image courtesy of Cynthia "Onye" Onyejiji
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From the day they met, food has always played a role in their relationship, and working together in the food industry is what we call a full circle moment. Learn more about Bryant and Daniella’s story of finding love with one another.
How they met.
Bryant: We met at a mutual clients’ house. She was doing the lady hair, and I was cooking for the lady. The client sent her downstairs to record me while I was cooking to, I guess, see what I was cooking, and I caught her recording, but we didn't talk. I caught her recording, we laughed it off, and she went about her day.
So I guess that was the first thing that made us interact with each other. A few months down the line, I think she posted something [on social media]. I hopped in her DM and responded to it, and then we decided to just meet up and hang out. I looked at her as an entrepreneur. I'm an entrepreneur. She don’t need nothing. I don’t need nothing. It's good to hang with people who don't need nothing from you.
When we linked up, our chemistry was just so soft and just so nice. She is a great person, but after meeting up with her [for the] first time, she went back to Miami. She came back [to Atlanta], and we just kicked it off that next weekend, and ever since then, we've been locked in.
Daniella: That same client had flew me back in so I knew I had to come up here for work. But I told him that we'll meet up and [go] on a date and see each other again. When that happened, everything else was history. It just happened organically. It wasn’t forced or anything.
Bryant and Daniella Williams
Courtesy
First impressions.
Bryant: I knew for a fact for her to come downstairs and try to record me, I knew that she was brave, and that said a lot about her, because I barely even talk when I'm cooking for my clients. So you have to talk to somebody for them to feel comfortable to play with you, or do certain things. I feel like the client sent her downstairs because she knew that she's an outspoken, bubbly type of person who don't mind laughing it off if she gets caught doing it.
When she came back to Atlanta, she booked me to cook for her family. So while I was cooking for her in the kitchen, the whole time she was in there talking to me. It was like a date in the kitchen, and I cooked her food. Once the food was laid out, I just left. We had a great conversation when I was cooking for her, and also when she came downstairs and tried to record me.
Daniella: I was impressed how he was multitasking because I was asking him deep, interesting questions, and he was cooking the food, and he was still answering my questions. But I was in a relationship at that time, so I wasn't really in tune. It was no emotions. But when I came back and flew in to work, we met with each other.
He came and picked me up from the hotel and we drove around Atlanta, sightseeing. We went to the African club. So when he came downstairs, I was like okay, you not gonna hug me, you not gonna say nothing? He was shocked and we stayed together for like eight or nine hours, and he took me back to the hotel. I think he picked me up around nine at night. He took me back to the hotel around seven in the morning. Then he walked me to my hotel door. He gave me a hug and he gave me a kiss and said, 'I love you.' And I was like, what?
We stayed together for like eight or nine hours, and he took me back to the hotel. I think he picked me up around nine at night. He took me back to the hotel around seven in the morning. Then he walked me to my hotel door. He gave me a hug and he gave me a kiss and said, 'I love you.' And I was like, what?
The one.
Daniella: When we first linked up, he took me around Atlanta. He was soft and gentle. He was a gentleman. He opened the door for me and I never had nobody open the door. He opened the door every single time I was going in and getting out the car, and when we went to that restaurant. I was like, [there’s] something about him, and he was just nice, calm and patient. So I knew he was a little different from what I'm used to.
Bryant: [I knew she was the one by] how she cared so much. She didn't really know me like that. She knew of me, but she cared so much about me. When we first met, she would lay on me and just relax. For someone who just wants to relax on you, that says a lot about them towards you. It wasn't like I had to prove myself and she didn’t have to prove herself with me either. It wasn't nothing like that. We were willing to take whatever came with it. But it just was really a break. It was like the best me meeting a woman because I didn't try.
Any other woman, I might be trying to dress up, take her to this place, I did not try at all. I picked her up and I actually thought that she wasn't gonna go on the date with me because of her status and my status. I'm such a laid back homey dude and she's from Miami. I thought she would be on the City Girls, you gotta do this, do that. But she wasn't. She was the total opposite. She was a homebody, chill, like me.
Bryant and Daniella Williams
Courtesy
Marriage advice for couples.
Bryant: Work together. Communication, put your mind together.
Daniella: And keep your family out your business.
Bryant: Keep it private please. Y'all work it out first. When y'all make sure it's solidified, then you tell them, or let them find out on their own. Privacy is the most valuable thing.
Daniella: And date each other because people get married and they stop doing the things that they did to get you, or stop doing the things that they did while they were in a relationship with you, before y'all got married. No, do the same thing. For me, I get bored easy, and I think he knows that. So just keep it spicy. Keep it interesting.
Bryant: We like spontaneous stuff like last-minute trips, trying different foods, going out the country just off a spur of a moment. You gotta make it fun. Don't just make it all business. And I think one person out of the relationship needs to take the initiative to make sure their partner is relaxing and at peace. A lot of people carry functional depression to where they’re functional, like we're doing this right now, but they can be going through something.
I don't think it's male or female. I think whichever one, the other partner should notice it and work with their partner to get through whatever they get through, like, for postpartum depression and stuff. That's something that most men don't even really know exist, but that's something when she had our daughter, I had an anti-postpartum depression plan put in place for her. She didn't know about it, but I knew I was gonna be extra sweet to her.
She won't have to think about doing nothing with the little baby. My little girl was watching the football game with me, when she was a few weeks old, because I was giving her that peace, so she can just relax, because her body has been through so much. So you got to be considerate of your mate's mental state and their mental well-being, because when it's gone, it's gone and it takes a lot to get it back, so I think that's important.
When she had our daughter, I had an anti-postpartum depression plan put in place for her. She didn't know about it, but I knew I was gonna be extra sweet to her. She won't have to think about doing nothing with the little baby. My little girl was watching the football game with me, when she was a few weeks old, because I was giving her that peace, so she can just relax, because her body has been through so much.
If you see something not right with your spouse, help them get help. It's okay for them to talk to a therapist by themselves, or it's okay for them to talk to somebody, but don't just sit there and let them go into this decline and self-destruction. I think that's the most important, because sometimes she be overwhelmed, and I have to be that person to hold her up. And then sometimes I'm overwhelmed. To her, baby, I don't want to do this no more. She's like, you gonna do this. We gonna do this. And she reminds me who I am. I remind her who she is, and we come back feeling more motivated.
Daniella: I think business owners should date business owners because they understand your hustle, your hunger. They understand when you can have a day where you make $0 and you have a day when you make $1,000. But I feel like if you dating someone who is in corporate America, and you a business owner, there's going to be a lot of friction, a lot of tension, and I just feel like I want to date someone that has the same drive as me.
Because I don't want to feel like I'm trying to build a bear, build a man, and I have to pull you and drag you, or just being with somebody who got they self together. For instance, my last relationship. I won't say I was the breadwinner, but I was kind of established, and I felt like I was sleeping with the enemy. I was growing fast and I wasn't stagnant. I was trying to get to the next level. He started to be jealous of me and I feel like a lot of women deal with men trying to be jealous of them. Men also have ego issues where they don't really want their woman making a certain amount of money or making more money than them.
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