Meet The Women Radiating Main Character Energy
If you came across this article and clicked on it because of its title, you might be wondering, what is "main character energy"? Don't worry girl, we've got you covered. Main character energy is a phrase that gained popularity through TikTok and places the spotlight where it needs to be, on you as the writer and architect of your own story. And as such, you are the main character. Main character energy is a positive way to describe yourself as it refers to an interesting, multi-faceted, multi-layered protagonist who are ultimately the loves of their own lives, period.
Main character energy isn't a trend, it's a lifestyle. Main character energy takes time and dedication to crafting the best life for yourself by yourself. For many years, I struggled to tap into my "main character energy" due to my lack of self-confidence and codependency. After my breakup, I took time to find myself again. Once I put in the work to heal, I began to find radical self-acceptance. Embracing my "main character energy", I became the love of my own life.
Below are a few women I admire who I feel radiate main character energy. They have put so much love into themselves and are amazing women. Here is how they have become the main character of their own life.
Devri Velazquez
Courtesy of Devri Velazquez
Writer, Digital Creative, and Rare Disease Survivor
"When I was 20 years old, I was diagnosed with a rare disease that has no cure. It devastated me so much. More than the physical limitations I experienced in the first few years of my diagnosis, my mental health was rocked. It was important for me to root myself in my faith and spirituality so I didn't lose my mind. I did not like myself at all, but years later after my illness went into remission and I could go back to work, I gained my confidence back.
"I put one foot in front of the other and had to realize that this was my new normal, and if I still wanted to succeed in whatever I envisioned for my life, then I needed to stop spending so much energy pitying myself and instead, navigate the obstacles in the best way I could."
"Whenever I see something in my life, I manifest it and work towards a goal to make it a reality. I've moved across the country twice with no savings, no friends, nothing to my name but my ambition. I take a lot of pride in trusting my intuition and forging my path a lot of times even when my decisions were unpopular or seemed unrealistic."
Tanika Lambert
Courtesy of Tanika Lambert
Athleisurewear Designer
"I overcame challenges because I had to ask myself hard questions. The one question I had to ask myself was, 'What do I want?' When I finally answered this question, more opportunities began to open up for me.
"I'm living life on my terms by, doing the things that matter to me. I found that being intentional with what I want and what goals I want to accomplish helped me a lot."
"Self-love, acceptance, and understanding has helped me with outside relationships because now I know what people I want around me. I want positive people around me that will elevate and motivate me."
Courtney Richardson
Courtesy of Courtney Richardson
Creative Strategist for Paper Magazine and founder of Do It For The Brand
"Growing up Black and being a woman is a challenge within itself. When you grow up as such, society tells you that you're not worthy, that you're less than, and that you don't matter. Whether it's the lack of representation in entertainment or the systematic barriers that are set up to hold people like me back due to race and gender, it's easy to be on the sidelines. So, I wasn't always the main character in my own life growing up due to how society saw (and still sees) people that look like me. But it became so exhausting that I got tired of being tired.
"In my early twenties, I decided it was much easier to love who I was and steep in that joy than it was to not. And at the same time, for many who look like me, there's also an innate form of resilience by being a woman and a Black woman at that. By being such, I've been able to come into my own by embracing the gifts of being a Black woman and defying what society negates me to be."
"A while ago, I made a non-negotiable contract within myself that contain terms like:
- I refuse to put energy into things that don't light me up.
- My joy is my joy and no one else's.
- The only time I'll sleep on myself is when I have to get rest.
- Recharge but also refuse to have any apologies about doing so.
"By living life by my own set of terms, I can hold myself to be accountable to my measure of greatness, growth, and gratitude."
Ty-Michelle
Courtesy of Ty-Michelle
DJ and CEO of #ZenitudeShop
"What has helped me become comfortable with my whole self is fully accepting my flaws. I think we all strive to be a perfect model of ourselves but the reality is, there is no such thing as perfect. I've reached a place where I now fully understand the concept of duality and how important it is for us to honor both the light and dark sides of who we are.
"Once I began living in the space of honoring my mistakes instead of running and hiding from them, I began to settle into my true self."
"I wake up every single day and do what I want. If I need a rest, I take it. If I feel like I need a spa day, I plan one. Most importantly I don't let other people dictate what my life should look like or let opinions from outsiders get to me. We only get one run at this. I do what makes me happy and let God worry about the rest."
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Featured image by Courtney Richardson
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Rihanna Talks Shedding Expectations And Finding Balance As A Mother
Since becoming a mother in 2022, Rihanna has defined parenthood by her terms and hopes to pass that sense of autonomy on to her children.
For Vogue China’s April cover story, Rihanna shared her perspective on raising her two sons with A$AP Rocky, and how she hopes to preserve her children’s uniqueness, devoid of societal expectations.
"The most beautiful thing...is that [children] come into the world with their own individuality and sincerity, without any logic or conformity,” she told the publication. “Which usually makes you feel that you must fit into a certain group."
The “Work” artist, known for her trendsetting style and captivating persona, expressed her desire to support children in fully embracing their individuality and encouraging them to be whoever they want to be. "It's really beautiful to see and I want to continue to help them navigate that and make sure that they know they can be whoever they want to be,” she says.
She continues, “They should embrace it completely, because it's beautiful, and it's unique. I love them just that way."
From shattering music charts to shaking up the beauty industry, Rihanna has forged a path that has since created the “dream” life we see today. One that she says has made her parents proud of.
“I’m living my dream,” she continued. “My parents were very proud of that because they just wanted me to be happy and successful. So, I think the key thing is to find some kind of balance. Yes, balance is important. Do this and you get the best of both worlds. You can write your own life the way you want, and it will be beautiful. Sometimes, you just need to let go of everyone’s expectations and start living your own story.”
Rihanna, who shares sons, RZA, 23 months, and Riot, 8 months, with rapper A$AP Rocky, recently shared her vision for expanding her family in the future in Interview Magazine.
When stylist Mel Ottenberg asked about the number of additional children she hoped to have, Rihanna replied, "As many as God wants me to have.”
"I don't know what God wants, but I would go for more than two. I would try for my girl,” she adds. “But of course, if it's another boy, it's another boy."
Featured image by Neil MockfordWireImage