
Rewriting A Legacy: Jaleel White’s Complicated Relationship With 'Family Matters'

What Jaleel White did for the culture on Family Matters is unmatched.
Jaleel’s memoir Growing Up Urkel has reignited conversations about his legacy and the impact of Family Matters on Black television. As the actor who brought the iconic character Steve Urkel to life, the Cali native became a household name, yet his journey with the series has been anything but straightforward.
Through his memoir, White attempts to grapple with the highs and lows of his Family Matters experience—and in doing so, opens the door to a broader discussion about accountability, ego, and the legacy of Black storytelling.
Reflecting on His Comments
In an interview at the Wilmington Library for the launch of his new book, Jaleel said, “Being a part of the ‘TGIF’ [ABC programming block] brand sometimes makes you feel like you don’t belong in the pantheon of Blackness.” He went on to say, “Blackness has been treated as a very monolithic experience in entertainment. 'If it’s not a hood story, it’s not a Black story.' And you know, sometimes I feel left out of that.”
Jaleel continued, “If there’s ever a poll, and they say what are your favorite Black shows? Martin is in there, Living Single… I already know we’re coming in last. But if there’s ever a poll and it’s just your favorite family shows, suddenly we rank really high. So it’s kind of interesting in how we look at ourselves even as Black folks.”
Jaleel White on feeling left out in the legacy of Black entertainment, saying, “If it’s not a hood story, it’s not a Black story,” and speaks on Family Matters always ranking last on polls for favorite Black shows, underneath Martin and Living Single.
— The Art Of Dialogue (@ArtOfDialogue_) December 9, 2024
(🎥Wilmington… pic.twitter.com/Bz72OtmjRw
This assertion dismisses the show’s groundbreaking representation of a middle-class Black family and its importance in cementing diverse Black experiences on television.
White’s recent reflections on Family Matters reveal a sense of tension about the role that defined his career. In one particularly striking statement, he expressed frustration that the show’s legacy often overshadows his personal contributions to its success. However, his commentary also delves into a narrative suggesting that he was unfairly labeled as "difficult" due to his popularity, a claim that has raised eyebrows among fans and former colleagues alike.
A Counterpoint: The Importance of Diverse Black Stories
Family Matters may not align with the "gritty" narratives White referenced, but its significance cannot be understated. As part of the TGIF lineup, the show offered a joyful, heartfelt portrayal of Black family life that resonated with audiences across racial and socioeconomic lines. Its success paved the way for more nuanced representations of Black life on television, proving that Black stories are not monolithic.
White’s comments seem to reflect a narrow perspective that undervalues the cultural impact of Family Matters. By focusing on what the show wasn’t, he risks overshadowing what it was: a celebration of Black joy, love, and resilience. This delusion echoes a broader challenge in revisiting one’s past with clarity and accountability.
Parallels with Will Smith and the 'Fresh Prince' Controversy
White’s narrative invites comparisons to another iconic Black sitcom: The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. Will Smith, the show’s star, faced similar accusations of ego-driven behavior, particularly in his tumultuous relationship with Janet Hubert, the original Aunt Viv. Hubert’s departure from the series became a long-standing source of tension, with Smith’s rising stardom often cited as a factor in their feud.
However, Smith’s recent reflections demonstrate a willingness to take accountability for his actions. In interviews, he has openly acknowledged his mistakes, calling his treatment of Hubert a "young and foolish" error. This maturity and growth stand in stark contrast to White’s current stance, which appears to deflect responsibility and place blame elsewhere.
They reconciled in 2020 and even this year, Will pulled up at an event to support Janet, proving that the work can be done.
Arrested Development vs. Accountability
The difference between Smith’s and White’s approaches underscores the importance of accountability in rewriting one’s legacy. Growth requires the ability to confront uncomfortable truths, to acknowledge harm done, and to make amends where possible. Without this, attempts to reshape the narrative risk falling into the trap of arrested development—a refusal to move beyond past grievances or to recognize one’s own role in perpetuating conflict.
In late December, he showed some remorse for his initial comments saying, “I want to say, I misspoke, but I could’ve worded things better if I had known I was speaking on a world stage and not just a small room in Delaware.”
Jaleel said, “I shouldn’t have invoked the word ‘hood.’ When you say the word ‘hood,’ it makes certain people feel like you’re demeaning them. And that’s not what I meant at all. I conflated a couple of ideas. There’s a lot of good in the hood, and I shouldn’t have generalized. Those are the two mistakes I made in that.”
Moving Forward
Jaleel White’s memoir offers an opportunity to reflect on the complexities of fame, ego, and legacy. While his frustrations with Family Matters are valid to an extent, they should not overshadow the show’s cultural significance or the positive impact it had on countless viewers. As he continues to navigate this chapter of his life, White has the chance to embrace accountability and celebrate the diverse tapestry of Black stories that Family Matters represents.
In the end, legacy is not just about the stories we tell—it’s about how we choose to tell them. For Jaleel White, the next steps will determine whether his narrative is one of growth or of missed opportunities to honor a history that shaped him.
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Joce Blake is a womanist who loves fashion, Beyonce and Hot Cheetos. The sophistiratchet enthusiast is based in Brooklyn, NY but has southern belle roots as she was born and raised in Memphis, TN. Keep up with her on Instagram @joce_blake and on Twitter @SaraJessicaBee.
Reset Your Relationship: How To Start 2025 Strong With Your Partner
As the calendar turns and a new year unfolds, many of us are laser-focused on our career goals, fitness resolutions, and vision boards that outline the journey to our best selves. But amidst all the planning and self-improvement, have you made room for another important part of your life? Your relationship.
It's easy for couples to fall into a routine, going through the motions and letting their connection sit on autopilot. While comfort is natural in a long-term relationship, it’s important to remember: that what you don’t nurture, eventually fades. So, why not make 2025 the year you reset your relationship? Here’s how to start the year with a renewed bond, reigniting the spark that brought you together.
Step 1: Schedule Your Reset Meeting
The first step to hitting the reset button is a State of the Union meeting with your partner. This is your chance to take a pulse on the relationship, discuss what's working, and identify areas that need attention. It’s all about creating space to reflect, without distractions.
Grab a pen and paper (or open a shared note on your phone) and come prepared to share your top 2-3 desires for your relationship.
What do you both want to feel more of in 2025? Maybe it’s feeling more appreciated, or perhaps you want to reignite the passion you had when you first started dating. Whatever it is, get clear about it, and make sure both of you are on the same page.
This isn’t just about listing your own wants, it’s also about discussing ways to nurture each other’s needs. Relationship goals should be focused on fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual respect. Use this time to check in, not only with each other but with your individual feelings and expectations. Set the foundation for a fulfilling year ahead.
Step 2: Set A Date (Or Multiple!)
Having the meeting is only the first step. Now, it’s time to take action. One of the simplest ways to breathe new life into a relationship is by reintroducing consistent, intentional time spent together. For many couples, life gets busy, and date nights fall by the wayside. But dating doesn’t stop when you say "I do"—in fact, it’s even more essential.
During your reset meeting, lock in a regular date night that works for both of your schedules. This could be a weekly dinner date or an every-other-week adventure—whatever keeps things fresh. The goal is consistency. It’s easy to push date nights aside when life gets hectic, but if you set a specific date each week or month, you’re making your relationship a priority.
If you’re unsure what to do for your date nights, don’t worry! The key is creating new experiences together. This is what sparks excitement and brings you closer as a couple. Whether it’s cooking a new recipe together, trying a dance class, or exploring a nearby town, it’s about creating shared memories that build your connection.
Step 3: Find an Accountability Partner
Just like you might have a personal trainer to help you crush your fitness goals, an accountability partner for your relationship can do wonders for keeping both of you on track. Consider hiring a marriage coach or therapist—someone who can meet you where you are and guide you in strengthening your relationship.
When selecting a professional, it’s important to choose someone who truly wants the best for your marriage and can provide actionable advice.
Don’t be afraid to set high standards for your relationship, and seek guidance on how to keep it thriving for the long haul. In your reset meeting, discuss your commitment to growth, and be honest about areas where you may need support.
Marriage isn’t a set-it-and-forget-it endeavor—it’s an ongoing process. Regular check-ins with a professional can help keep your relationship in tip-top shape and “divorce-proof” by addressing issues before they become insurmountable.
Step 4: Try Something New Together
Stale routines can easily make a relationship feel monotonous. Spice things up by trying something new! Couples that explore new activities and create new memories together have stronger, more fulfilling bonds.
My husband and I host one of the top luxury marriage retreats, A Weekend For Love, designed to help couples experience new things together. From couples' workshops to outdoor adventures, the retreat provides a platform to rediscover each other and reconnect on a deeper level.
The element of surprise can reignite your connection. It’s exciting, fresh, and shows your partner that you’re committed to growing together. This doesn’t have to be a huge commitment—it could be as simple as trying a new hobby or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Your Relationship Should Be A Priority
As you start the year with personal goals in mind, don’t forget the importance of nurturing your relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in work, fitness, and family obligations, but your bond with your partner deserves to be at the top of your list. Resetting your relationship offers an opportunity to reignite that spark and remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
In 2025, make a commitment to prioritize your partnership, to nurture it daily, and to invest in its growth. Take time to celebrate each other’s victories, support one another’s dreams, and build a foundation of love and respect. When you start the year with a clear focus on your relationship, you’re setting it up for success.
So, before you start mapping out your new workout plan or work goals, do yourself a favor: put your relationship at the top of that list. Your love story deserves a fresh start, too.
Happy New Year, and here’s to a love-filled 2025!
Couples, if you are ready to do the work and invest in your relationship register for A Weekend For Love: Heart Retreat Feb 21-23, 2025.
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'One of Them Days' Star Keke Palmer & Director Lawrence Lamont Dish On The Wild & Hilarious Buddy Comedy
You know those days when everything that could go wrong… does? Where all you can do is laugh, cry, and maybe call your bestie for moral support? Well, One of Them Days takes that feeling, cranks it up to ten and delivers a comedy that’s as chaotic as it is relatable.
Starring Keke Palmer and SZA, this buddy comedy follows two best friends navigating one seriously outrageous day. Directed by Lawrence Lamont and co-produced by Issa Rae and Keke Palmer, the film brings big laughs, wild moments, and a much-needed dose of Black sisterhood to the big screen.
And with a cast that includes legends like Kat Williams, Vanessa Bell Calloway, and Abbott Elementary breakout star Janelle James, you already know the energy is on point. But what really makes the film shine is the chemistry between its leads.
“I didn’t want it to feel like a bunch of cameos. I wanted actors who embodied their characters,” Lamont shared. “Keke and SZA alone? They’re just dynamic. They really feel like besties. Even when the cameras weren’t rolling, I was like—should we still be filming this?Behind the Scenes: A Movie Made at Lightning Speed
Filming One of Them Days wasn’t just fun—it was fast. The entire movie was shot in just 21 days, which meant the cast and crew had to keep up with the action.
“We were moving at lightning speed, but I think we caught lightning in a bottle,” Lamont said. “One of my favorite scenes is the payday loan center scene. When I called cut, Keke and SZA were literally on the ground cracking up. They had so much fun.”
And that fun wasn’t just for the cameras. The film also brings a fresh take to Black-led comedies, proving that Black women deserve to be front and center in every genre.
“I want Black women to see that they can lead movies,” Lamont emphasized. “Not just be the co-star, not just third or fourth on the call sheet. Black women have fascinating stories, and they deserve to be the story.”
Keke Palmer: The Queen of Doing It All
If there’s one thing about Keke Palmer, it’s that she’s always working. But even with her long list of credits, One of Them Days is special—because it’s her first feature film as a producer. And she’s not doing it alone.
“Queen Latifah has always been so encouraging. She’s supported me creatively and in business since I was nine years old,” Palmer shared. “And then obviously, Issa—I mean, this is my first feature film as a producer, and when she had the project, she brought me on board. We worked on it together for six years. It takes one of us, wherever we are, to lift each other up.”
Why You Need to See This Movie
With its laugh-out-loud moments, ride-or-die friendship, and a fire soundtrack, One of Them Days is giving us the kind of fun, rewatchable comedy we’ve been missing.
“I remember going to see Superbad in high school, and we went three times,” Lamont said. “I want people to feel that excitement again—just going to the movies and having fun.”
So grab your besties, hit the theater, and get ready for One of Them Days—because if you’ve ever had a ridiculous, chaotic, what-the-hell-is-happening kind of day, this movie is for you.
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