

A few years ago, psychologists studied the correlation between seasons and romantic relationships. They concluded that the colder the weather, the more likely a relationship had a chance to thrive, hence, "cuffing season." Nevertheless, the warmer the weather, the more likely a relationship is to fail, consequently creating the term, "uncuffing season." "Uncuffing season" is defined as a period, usually the spring and summer, when "people who were previously in relationships during the winter break-up to be free for the summer and warm months." The idea is that once the relationship has concluded, one is able to play the field and not be tied down by the pestering obligations of a relationship. And unfortunately, this seems to be the case for the artists this week.
No longer singing about the best parts, we've entered in the phase of summertime sadness; and boy, is this summer scheduled to be a doozy. Between Leon Bridges' constant questions in "Why Don't You Touch Me," Nao's refusal to return to "Messy Love," and Cynthia Erivo choosing to remember only "The Good" parts of her relationship, it seems like everyone is being "uncuffed" and sent to enjoy their summers alone. Though, there might be light at the end of this tunnel yet. Why? Well, because if they're sent to join their summer's alone, chances are you are, too.
If that's the case, you'll have a couple of new ballads, and upbeat songs, that can help you make it through your summer blues, before finding yet another in the fall and winter months.
1. "Why Don't You Touch Me: Part 1" - Leon Bridges
With his new album Gold—Diggers Sound coming out July 23, 2021, Leon Bridges has arrived with part one of two singles, "Why Don't You Touch Me: Part 1" (you can listen to "Part 2" here). Like all of his other singles, Bridges' music feels like it has been written and sung by someone beyond his years. In "Why Don't You Touch Me: Part 1," Bridges wonders the title amongst other things, particularly why his lover doesn't seem to love him anymore.
Despite "dressin' to the nines" and his desires to do whatever to improve the relationship, Bridges' lover is distracted by the glitter and gold and continues to fade away. It's sad that his lover doesn't seem to be in love with him anymore, but the saddest part might be the fact that his relationship is ending and he doesn't even know why.
2. "Mad" - Hope Tala
To avoid the "Heartbreak Olympics," I won't say that one heartbreak is worse than the other. Although, when it comes to heartbreak, nothing quite matches the sting that comes from unrequited love. In Hope Tala's newest single "Mad," the 23-year-old London artist sings about having a lover fall out of love, while she is still head over heels. The song plays with an enticing allure, combining an acoustic guitar with a groove reminiscent of Bossa nova and a slowed samba, instead of a piano ballad.
As if her rage is simmering, Tala doesn't raise her voice, but allows her repetition of her wanting to tear her hair out to show her frustrations and sadness to her lover's sudden change in mind. At the end of the song, she is left with more questions than answers, which seems to be the new way of breaking up (a la the previously mentioned "Why Don't You Touch Me"). With her lover not answering her calls, it's hard to say if she'll get the closure she needs to extinguish her inevitable explosion.
3. "Messy Love" - Nao
After the early (leaked) release of her newest single, Nao has officially released "Messy Love" from her upcoming third album. Like her single "Make It Out Alive," in "Messy Love," Nao tells of a love that was once cherished turning into a burden. In a trope that I am glad to see artists taking, Nao decides to place self-love, self-respect, and inner peace over the struggles and insecurities created by an unstable and exhaustive relationship.
Old Nao might've had the energy to chase her lover, she might've had the energy to roll around and enjoy the mess of it all. Nevertheless, after one too many heartbreaks, Nao has reached a place in her life where she refuses to return back to "messy love."
She wants her love to know that she cares about him, but in the end, she will choose herself and her progress over everything, including this relationship.
4. "Wusyaname" - Tyler, the Creator ft. YoungBoy Never Broke Again & Ty Dolla Sign
Only Tyler, the Creator would walk up to a complete stranger and use "Aw, you look malnourished" as a pick-up line. Strangely for Tyler, the Creator, this seems well within his playbook and still might have the potential to work. In his recently released single "Wusyaname," Tyler, the Creator falls in love with a woman at first sight. Pursuing the woman, he hopes to get her attention by hurling insulting compliments one after the other. Creator's advancements are so contradictory that it wouldn't be surprising if this woman had experienced whiplash.
Although, after saying, "That's when I met 'She'"—a reference to his Goblin album and "She" track—it is clear to the audience that this woman probably deserves it. As if jumping into a time machine, the audience is given the moment that eventually leads to the chaotic moment that unravels in his and Frank Ocean's "She." In addition to this magic track, Tyler, the Creator's "Lumberjack" and "Brown Sugar Salmon" singles are out, too.
5. "2 You" - Mariah the Scientist
Something is in the water, and apparently it's forcing everyone to confront or end their relationships. Regardless of what it is, "2 You" is the newest single from Mariah the Scientist's upcoming project, Ry Ry World. In the song, the Atlanta-based artist reflects on a failed relationship. Pointing out her ex's flaws, Mariah addresses feeling disappointing in the direction of their relationship and embarrassment from allowing it to go on for so long. Unlike the singles mentioned before, Mariah the Scientist doesn't wonder why the relationship has ended or how they got there. Instead, she wonders why she doesn't feel at peace with this decision, despite knowing that it was for the best.
6. "BYE" - Jaden
Most artists have something that makes them uniquely and utterly them. For instance, SZA has her word play. J. Cole has his storytelling. Kendrick Lamar has his poetic prose and Jaden has his…well, everything? When I say this, I don't mean it negatively, I mean that Jaden is never the same person when a single is released. This is even shown in his name change from Jaden Smith, to just Jaden. For most artists, the constant change between genres, flow, writing, and artistry wouldn't work. It would make the listener feel like they are following too many artists at once. But for Jaden, it seems to be the main thing keeping his artistry afloat.
In his newest single, "BYE" Jaden ventures to the beach in hopes of repairing his broken relationship. Despite its melancholy theme, the song comes off as a light summer pop/hip-hop track, which juxtaposes the song released from the previous album. Although the songs from Syre are hip-hop tracks, "BYE" leans more into the pop genre with its layered harmonies and almost synthetic voice.
7. "t r a n s p a r e n t s o u l" - WILLOW ft. Travis Barker
There is a special kind of wonderful when a Black woman is in the alternative/indie genre. There is an even more special kind of wonderful when she seems like she'll dominate the genre, if given the chance. Returning with Blink 182 drummer, Travis Baker, Willow Smith has released a new hit, "Transparent Soul." The single is mixture of the early 2000s alternative/rock and 80s grunge, with a new 2021 spin. Her voice is powerful and dominating as she sings about being able to see through all of the lies of her subject. Whether she is talking to a lover, former friend, or just an over confident stranger, Willow puts her subject in their place as she tries to navigate between friends and foe.
8. "Pasadena" - Tinashe ft. Buddy
I just can't stop smiling when I hear this song. This is a bop, a groove, a shimmy, and a shake.. Ahead of her fifth album, Tinashe returns with her exhilarating new single "Pasadena." This upbeat track focuses on the pride and joy one obtains when they live freely and embrace the moment. With a fun video filled with group dancing, penthouses, and a beautiful skyline, "Pasadena" has the potential to be a song you need on repeat this summer.
9. "Bed Friend" - Jacquees ft. Queen Naija
With his newest single from his new album P.T.O.F, Jacquees and Queen Naija team up to tell the story of friends who've become lovers. Unlike the typical "friends with benefits" set up, Jacquees talks about falling in love with his best friend while still being in a relationship with another. He knows that his desire for his friend over his girlfriend is wrong, but he can't seem to stop making comparisons and he can't seem to want to invest in his relationship because of this. He is aware that he and his best friend are moving past the boundaries of their friendship, though, despite this knowledge he leans fully in, hoping that the relationship "doesn't end in a dead in." After all, if this doesn't work out, Jacquees is aware that he has more to lose than just "Bed Friend."
10. "The Good" - Cynthia Erivo
The last five years have been kind to Cynthia Erivo. Between her discovery in London, her Tony, Grammy, and Emmy awards, her roles in blockbuster movies (Harriet, Bad Times at the El Royale, and Widows), and the Aretha Franklin mini series, she has shown that hard work truly pays off. Now, she is tackling another milestone, this one in the form of her upcoming debut album. From Ch. 1 vs. 1, Erivo has released her newest single "The Good." The song tells a story about a failed relationship, but instead of mourning its absence, she choose to remember the good times. Despite the somber lyrics, the song is upbeat and almost playful while she sings soulfully and powerfully. Released during Pride Month, Erivo's video has her in a tumultuous same-sex relationship, which is rarely seen between two Black women, unless you're counting the recent season of Masters of None.
Keep scrolling for more singles released in the week of June 18 to June 25!
"Feeling Good" - Chloe Bailey
"Talk About It" - Jungle
"Letter to My Daughter" - NLE Chopper
"Live from the Country" - Logic
"Wish List" - Joey Trap
"Muddy Flow" - Kill Jasper
"Genesis" - Azizi Gibson ft. AKTHESAVIOR
"You the Type" - CJ Fly
DaBaby - "Ball If I Want To"
"LAW OF AVERAGES" - Vince Staples
"Angles" - Wale ft. Chris Brown
"When You Love Someone" - Tone Stith ft. H.E.R.
"Formwela 5" - Esperanza Spalding ft. Corey King
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Taysha Robinson is a writer and high school English teacher, based in metro-Atlanta. A self described philomath, you can find her reading books and articles of every genre, attending educational conferences, and hiking wherever the terrain will allow.
Eva Marcille On Starring In 'Jason’s Lyric Live' & Being An Audacious Black Woman
Eva Marcille has taken her talents to the stage. The model-turned-actress is starring in her first play, Jason’s Lyric Live alongside Allen Payne, K. Michelle, Treach, and others.
The play, produced by Je’Caryous Johnson, is an adaptation of the film, which starred Allen Payne as Jason and Jada Pinkett Smith as Lyric. Allen reprised his role as Jason for the play and Eva plays Lyric.
While speaking to xoNecole, Eva shares that she’s a lot like the beloved 1994 character in many ways. “Lyric is so me. She's the odd flower. A flower nonetheless, but definitely not a peony,” she tells us.
“She's not the average flower you see presented, and so she reminds me of myself. I'm a sunflower, beautiful, but different. And what I loved about her character then, and even more so now, is that she was very sure of herself.
"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Je-Caryous Johnson Entertainment
Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
Overall, Eva hopes that her contribution to the role and the play as a whole serves as motivation for others to reach for the stars.
“I want them to walk out with hope. I want them to re-vision their dreams. Whatever they were. Whatever they are. To re-see them and then have that thing inside of them say, ‘You know what? I'm going to do that. Whatever dream you put on the back burner, go pick it up.
"Whatever dream you've accomplished, make a new dream, but continue to reach for the stars. Continue to reach for what is beyond what people say we can do, especially as [a] Black collective but especially as Black women. When it comes to us and who we are and what we accept and what we're worth, it's not about having seen it before. It's about knowing that I deserve it.”
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
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As Told To: 'I Spent $10K On A Dating Coach & Now I’m Married To The Love Of My Life'
As Told To is a recurring segment on xoNecole where real women are given a platform to tell their stories in first-person narrative, as told to a writer.
This is Shirley Williams' story as told to Sheriden Chanel.
When I decided to become the CEO of my love life, it cost me over $10K.
Trust, sharing that choice online came with a lot of opinions I didn’t ask for. $10K on a dating coach? Yeah, I did that. And less than two years later, I’m married to the man I prayed for. So if you’re wondering about the ROI... let’s just say it paid off in full.
But before all that, let me take you back to how this journey really began.
When I resolved to walk away from my 13-year relationship, admittedly, I wasn’t thinking about dating at all. My ex was a good man. He was kind, he was cool, but I knew he wasn’t my man. God knew that, too, even before I did.
We had reached a fork in the road: I was growing deeper in my faith, wanting to center God in every part of my life, including my purpose. He was walking a different path, and we were no longer aligned. Turns out, you can spend 13 years with someone and still be emotionally malnourished.
As our relationship came to its end, I learned that longevity isn’t proof of alignment. I learned that a man being “good” isn’t enough. A man can be kind but not called to walk beside you in your purpose. That being unclear about your values will always cost you time.
And delaying your desires in the name of comfort? That’ll cost you even more. I knew I never wanted to make that mistake again.
Still, even knowing it was right to let him go, walking away felt like mourning a death. I dated casually after that: flings and situationships here and there. But they took more than they gave. I was left depleted more than fulfilled, so I made a conscious decision to stop dating altogether.
Around the same time, my mother was diagnosed with a brain injury that left her unable to form short-term memories. My sister and I became her caregivers along with my dad. But just as I got her stabilized, my father was diagnosed with blood cancer. At one point, he was bedridden.
So no, I wasn’t thinking about love. I was thinking about survival.
For two years, I didn’t give out my number. Didn’t go on a single date. I was tired, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. But not just from dating. From everything.
Those two years weren’t about fear, they were about focus. I was caregiving, grieving, and building a startup from the ground up. I had nothing left to give romantically. So when my birthday came around in September 2023, I knew I needed stillness to replenish what I had lost.
I went to Joshua Tree alone, I booked a tiny home in the middle of the desert, and I told myself: “I’m going to be still.” For five days, I read, prayed, fasted, and listened to jazz and classical music. No distractions.
Courtesy of Shirley Vernae
On the drive back to LAX, it hit me like a ton of bricks, and I couldn’t unsee it: I had invested in every other area of my life, except my love life. I realized then that my love life deserved a strategy, too.
So, I did what I always do when I want to grow in an area: I found someone wiser. I found an expert who could guide me in the form of a dating coach, and I hired him. Because love is too sacred to leave to chance. And I was finally ready to build it on purpose.
To some, hiring a dating coach might’ve looked like desperation. But desperation doesn’t look like pausing for two years, it looks like settling for crumbs and calling it a meal. You’ll mistake attention for affection, and chaos for chemistry. Desperation doesn’t discern. It just consumes.
That wasn’t me. Not only was I not desperate, but I was a little too comfortable being single.
I didn’t invest $10K+ in a dating coach because I was desperate. I invested because I was done repeating old patterns. Strategy is getting honest about your desire and then building a pathway toward it with clarity, with guidance, and with God.
I had invested in every other area of my life, my business, my health, and my growth. Why would my love life be the one place I left to chance?
So no, I wasn’t desperate. I was ready. Ready to stop guessing. Ready to stop wasting time. Ready to become the kind of woman who could receive the kind of love I prayed for.
But before I could become her, I had to face the parts of me still holding on to old beliefs.
When I walked away from that relationship and got into therapy, everything shifted. My therapist helped me unpack my wounds, my conditioning, and the patterns I couldn’t see on my own. And when the fog cleared, I was 100% sure: God had given me this desire. And I was not going to let doubt, distraction, or misalignment steal it from me.
This wasn’t just about having a plan, it was about being in divine alignment.
Between 2023 and now, I’ve invested close to $12,000 in coaching. I joined Anwar White’s Get Your Guy program in October 2023. The program was $7,500 over six months—that’s $1,250 a month, less than some people spend on luxury items they’ll outgrow. And for me? It made perfect sense.
After starting the program, I met my now-husband that December. We became official in spring 2024, and he proposed in January 2025.
But the real shift wasn’t him. It was me. I no longer chased anything—not men, not clients, not friendships. I stopped striving and started trusting. I started existing, and I let what was aligned come to me.
And when he came, he came steady. Consistent. Intentional. Reliable. Joyful. He was deeply committed to my happiness before anything else. He doesn’t move unless it’s with care for my heart.
With him, there is no performance. No eggshells. No pressure. Just alignment.
We walk together, in purpose. I now have a partner who is in service to me, not in competition with me. A partner who lightens my load. Mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. He helps me think. Helps me build. Helps me breathe. He makes my life easier, and that is something I had never experienced before.
I still reinvest in my love life by continuing to work with Anwar. His programs have taken me from dating, to courting, to exclusivity, to engaged, and now to being married. Because each of those phases required a new version of me. Because I had never been here before.
@shirleyvernae I hadn’t been on a single date in 2 years. Met my fiancé last year and got engaged 2 months ago. You’re the CEO of your love life. It’s time to act like it ❤️ # CEO ##Fiancé##Engaged##Relationships##Dating##Engagement
Through Anwar’s program, I was gifted the most pivotal mindset shift of them all:
That love doesn’t have to feel like a struggle. And that’s my new standard.
One of the most powerful things Anwar said to me was, “You can’t do the wrong thing to the right guy.” And that truth set me free.
Before working with him, I thought love had to be proved. Performed. Earned. I thought I had to be perfect. Healed. Small enough to fit into someone else’s version of love. But that was never true.
There are men who are devoted to creating ease in your life. Men who see your softness as strength and your boundaries as beauty.
My now-husband, Ty, is one of them. He is steady. He is consistent. And no matter how much I struggled, no matter how I tried to self-sabotage, he stayed anchored in one mission: to bring ease, to bring peace, to bring safety.
So the shift? I stopped performing. I started discerning. I raised my standards. I stopped doubting. And I let myself be held.
Yeah, the biggest shift was realizing I am worthy of love that doesn’t come with chaos. Love that’s safe. Love that’s solid. Love that’s soft.
That’s what happens when you stop settling and start showing up with faith, clarity, and strategy. That’s what happens when you become the CEO of your love life.
Being the CEO of my love life meant I stopped outsourcing it to luck, fate, or vibes. I no longer left it up to chance or timing, or wishful thinking. Just like I build businesses with vision, strategy, and intentional partnerships, I built a love life that reflects those same values.
A good CEO doesn’t try to do it all alone. A good CEO casts vision, brings the right experts to the table, delegates with wisdom, and trusts the process. That’s exactly how I approached love. I partnered with God. I partnered with mentors. I aligned my actions with my desires. That’s not control, that’s stewardship. And that’s what changed everything.
I knew sharing my journey online was going to stir something up. And it did. Some people were inspired. Some were uncomfortable. But their discomfort wasn’t about me. It was about what my story confronted in them: scarcity, shame, old beliefs about what’s “worth it” and what’s not.
And I’m okay with that. I’m not here to be liked. I’m here to be aligned. That’s my assignment.
To the woman who’s feeling discouraged, let me say this: Time is a tool, don’t let it become your tormentor. You are not late. You are not behind. You are not disqualified. Your desire for love is not shameful, it’s sacred.
Don’t let what society says, what the media projects, or what a non-believer has spoken over you define what’s possible. The only thing that’s true is what God has said. And God has said, “All things are possible to him that believes.”
If you’re feeling stuck, let that be your invitation to do something different. You don’t have to do this alone. Ask for help. Get support. Find a coach, a mentor, a couple you admire—not the shiny ones on social media, but the ones who’ve walked through fire and still chose each other.
Date with intention. Choose love on purpose. Marriage is a gift from God, and it is never too late to receive it. There is strength in being seen, supported, and walking in purpose together.
And for my Black women especially, softness is your superpower. Discernment is your birthright. You are the prizeand the picker. Dating with intention isn’t about being aggressive, it’s about being aligned.
We are not desperate. We are divine. Even in your healing, even in your becoming, know this: you can never do the wrong thing to the right guy.
And the right guy? He’ll meet you right there: in your wholeness, and in your work-in-progress.
To keep up with Shirley Vernae Williams and her journey as a storyteller, producer, and love life CEO, follow her on Instagram @shirleyvernae and learn more about her work at williebstudios.com.
Featured image courtesy of Shirley Vernae