January is all about maintaining a positive vision for the future and finding your balance amid change. A lot is going on this month, yet everything that is occurring is bringing things back home. Life is moving at its own pace this month, and the more you can trust the timing of life and where things are moving, the more you can gain. The month begins in the midst of Capricorn Season, with Mercury and Mars both in retrograde. Plans may not fall through exactly how they were planned for the time being, yet everything is happening exactly how it needs to. With both these planets being in retrograde for half of the month, schedules, plans, and communication channels should be looked over thoroughly, and patience is needed.
Venus enters Aquarius on January 2nd, and love is to the community and the collective while Venus is in Aquarius. Relationships take on a lighter tone while Venus is in Aquarius, and this releases some of the pressure that’s been felt while Venus was in Capricorn over the past month. Venus now being in an air sign for most of the month makes communication key regarding relationship development, and it’s about listening to your heart just as much as you are listening to what’s being said. The Full Moon of the month occurs less than a week after, on January 6th, and this Full Moon will be happening in Cancer. Emotions run high, and a chapter closes in life to bring you closer to the soul. This Full Moon is all about letting go of old baggage and healing the heart.
On January 12th, Mars officially goes direct after being retrograde in Gemini since October 30, 2022. Mars retrograde created chaos and switched things up in spaces that were once stable. Mars retrograde's duty was to shake things up and create a new direction forward that better aligns with what you are inspired by. Now that Mars is officially direct, you can take more action on your creative vision and dreams, and there are fewer road bumps on your path to success. Mercury also goes direct in Capricorn soon after on January 18th; and travel delays, miscommunication, and stability challenges all ease up during this time. Mercury direct in Capricorn makes concrete steps easier to take, and manifestation potential is increased during this time. Dream the dream, and take intentional action on them to see success.
Aquarius Season begins as the month ends on January 20th, and there is a New Moon in Aquarius as well as on the next day. Aquarius Season is a time when inspiration abounds, and a time to find your balance between logic and magic. Dreams come true during Aquarius Season, and this Aquarius New Moon is a good time to set your intentions and plan for the future. Uranus goes direct in Taurus on January 22nd after being in retrograde since August 2022, and there are fewer interruptions and disruptions when it comes to rest, feeling grounded, and following your heart.
With so many planets moving direct this month after being in retrograde, there is a huge weight lifted off the shoulders, and plans can come together again. January overall is all about perspective, patience, and growth.
What's in Store for Aries in January 2023
AriesKyra Jay for xoNecole2023 is a powerful year for Aries and the year begins with you taking the time to rest, prepare, and re-energize before moving further into the year. This month is all about listening to your body, your emotions, and your gut instincts, and about not being afraid to go at your own pace even if those around you are going at a different one. This is your month to let a new cycle of your life appear for you, while you move through your current journey with ease.
The New Moon this month is when you will be feeling a lot of that magic that the year has in store for you. On January 21st there is a New Moon in your 11th house of hopes, dreams, and friendship, and this is an excellent time of the month to start visualizing your future and everything you want to happen over the next year. With Venus also moving into your 12th house on January 26th, it’s about finding your balance between what’s falling away and what is coming this month.
What’s in Store for Taurus in January 2023
TaurusKyra Jay for xoNecoleLove is flowing into your life in January, Taurus. This is a month of emotional expression and connection, about finding a good middle ground you haven’t felt in a while. This is a month of letting your heart lead the way and discovering that vulnerability isn’t a weakness, it is a strength to commend yourself on. This month you are finding your way by listening to your heart.
Communication is vital this month with a Full Moon occurring in your 3rd house on January 6th. This Full Moon is bringing in culminations in your life regarding mental healing, growth, and clarity. Important messages are coming through for you at the beginning of the month, and the more you can express how you are feeling, the better. A very important transit occurs before the month ends, and that is Uranus officially going direct in Taurus, after being retrograde since August 2022. What you can expect now are less chaos and disruption, and more intentional change and positive surprises.
What’s in Store for Gemini in January 2023
GeminiKyra Jay for xoNecoleJanuary is all about the direction in life you are heading in right now, Gemini. The month begins amid Mercury retrograde, and Mercury retros are always a little closer to home for you with Mercury being your ruling planet. This Mercury retrograde is a little more impactful, however, as Mars is currently retrograde in Gemini as well. With the energy of reflection flowing through your world this month, there is a need to consider all options and really define what you want to create in your life.
On January 12th, Mars in Gemini goes direct after being retrograde since October 2022 and Mercury goes direct on January 18th. This is a major win for Geminis, as the pressure is lifted off your shoulders. Mars retrograde made the plan ahead feel more confusing than you wanted it to be, and the lack of energy this transit brought was difficult to move through. Now that you are in direct motion, you are ready for some dreams to come to fruition, and your mind is looking ahead with hope and strength.
What’s in Store for Cancer in January 2023
CancerKyra Jay for xoNecoleJanuary is all about maintaining a clear vision, and about putting your manifestation gifts to use, Cancer. This is a month of everything coming together one by one, and about you feeling confident about what is unfolding for you this month. You have your eyes on the prize, and you are headed in the right direction right now. January is here to show you that anything is possible with the right mindset, heart, and belief in yourself.
The Full Moon this month is happening on January 6th, and it is occurring in your sign. A Cancer Full Moon is always more emotional than most, and this is the time of the month to let go of any emotional baggage you have been carrying and allow healing to take place. This Full Moon is closing out one chapter, and you are preparing and lining everything up for a new one. January is a month of moving forward, moving on, and taking your dreams seriously, Cancer.
What’s in Store for Leo in January 2023
LeoKyra Jay for xoNecoleAbundance is yours to claim this month, Leo. January is a month of good fortune, love, and a time of paving a new path forward for yourself. You have a lot of opportunities for success this month, and blessings are falling into your lap. The seeds and intentions you have been planting in your life are blooming as the new year begins, and you are soaking in all the magic that surrounds you.
The financial abundance you are seeing this month is only one part of the story, as love and your relationships are also seeing positive growth in January. With the Sun moving into your opposite sign Aquarius on January 20th, and a New Moon here the next day, you are seeing new beginnings in love as the month ends. You are turning the page from a time of feeling like you have to do everything yourself and you can’t rely on others, into a time where you are feeling that support, connection, and emotional stability in your life.
What’s in Store for Virgo in January 2023
VirgoKyra Jay for xoNecoleJanuary is your time to heal, Virgo. Your heart needs recovery time, and this month is your month to emotionally process, accept, and move into a new day. There is an energy with you this month of taking into account what has happened over the past few months and taking the time to release the heaviness and pain of the past. You are getting the opportunity to move into a new direction in January, however, leaving behind the old isn’t as easy as you thought it would be. Take as much time as you need this month, and allow what’s meant to be, be.
With your ruling planet Mercury, retrograde in your 5th house of romance, creativity, and happiness this month, there is a need to reflect on happiness and what that truly means to you. Do your vices serve you or do they harm you? Do the people around you reflect the love you feel or want to see in your life? Once Mercury goes direct on January 18th, you feel a breath of fresh air, and all the emotional heaviness you have been feeling begins to ease. January is overall a month of healing and growth for you, Virgo.
What’s in Store for Libra in January 2023
LibraKyra Jay for xoNecoleFortune is on your side this month, Libra. January is a month of positive change, blessings, and moving into a new beginning. The grace you have shown yourself and others through all of the changes you have been through is showing fruition this month, and you are receiving the benefits of this patience. January is all about remaining flexible and open to change and riding the wave of abundance and positivity.
Mars officially moves out of retrograde and goes direct this month, and this is good news for you when it comes to travel, adventure, education, and spiritual pursuits. Look out for opportunities for a vacation this month. The New Moon on January 21st is occurring in fellow air sign Aquarius, and this New Moon is bringing a new beginning for your heart. This New Moon is here to fulfill some dreams of happiness, love, and connection; and self-expression is key right now. Overall, January is about moving into a new chapter of your life with ease.
What’s in Store for Scorpio in January 2023
ScorpioKyra Jay for xoNecoleJanuary is a month of getting inspired, Scorpio. You are thinking a lot about the future this month and where you are headed right now, and your perspective is everything in January. The inspiration you are feeling this month is creating a new vision for your future, and you are ready to redefine what you want to put your energy into and focus on. The sky's the limit for you Scorpio, and this is a month of truly believing in yourself and taking those intentional steps toward your dreams and goals.
The Full Moon occurring in fellow water sign Cancer on January 6th brings things full circle when it comes to your beliefs, perspective, and spiritual journey. You are taking note of what adventures in life you’ve followed through on, and what spaces and people you would still like to connect with. Venus enters your 5th house of romance on January 26th before the month ends, and love is on your side moving into February. Your heart is in a good place this month, and there is a lot of excitement in the air for you in January.
What’s in Store for Sagittarius in January 2023
SagittariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleConnect with your inner strength, Sagittarius. Patience is everything this month, and your courage will help you maintain that. January is a time of letting things unfold without forcing the outcome. Hold your vision of what you want to see come to fruition, but don’t let changes to plans and circumstances out of your control waver your self-confidence. The more you can hold your ground and trust the process, the better this month will be.
January is a month of preparation for you, Sagittarius. This isn’t the most action-packed month for you and that is because you need time to gain strength, prepare, and envision what you want to see play out this year. The passion is there, but you need more time to figure out where you want to be and who you want to be there with. The New Moon occurring on January 21st is a time when you are getting the clarity you have been looking for, and connections are being made.
What’s in Store for Capricorn in January 2023
CapricornKyra Jay for xoNecoleThe spotlight is on you this month, Capricorn. Capricorn Season is fully underway, and there is a lot to process this month. The month begins with Mercury in Retrograde in your sign, and there is a need to have more patience when it comes to your communications with others, and to try to find your middle ground here. Not everyone may agree or see your perspective, but it’s important to maintain an open mind and trust that what is for you will feel right. January is your time to shine and to allow space for others to shine in their way too.
The Full Moon in Cancer on January 6th is a good time to let go of any relationship drama or challenges you have been having and to make space for new growth. You are closing out one chapter of life and moving into one that feels closer to love and connection. Once Mercury goes direct on January 18th, any challenges you have been having with others begin to subside, and an olive branch is given. The goal this month is self-acceptance, love, and working on building the relationships in your life rather than challenging them.
What’s in Store for Aquarius in January 2023
AquariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleYou are moving forward freely in January, Aquarius. January is a month of success, positive recognition, and achievement. You are moving into the new year full speed ahead, and you are ready to claim your victories. The support you have been looking for is coming into your life this month, and you have a lot to be grateful for in January. This is your month to put yourself out there, be confident, and lead the way forward for others. With Venus entering your sign on January 2nd as the month begins, you are moving into the month with love on your side.
More energy begins to move into Aquarius in the second half of the month as Aquarius Season begins on January 20th, and there is a New Moon in Aquarius the very next day on January 21st as well. With the Sun officially moving into Aquarius this month, the vision becomes clear, and the community around you is highlighted. The end of the month is a good time to connect with others, give help where needed, and work together with the people around you to create something beautiful.
What’s in Store for Pisces in January 2023
PiscesKyra Jay for xoNecoleLife comes full circle, and blessings are falling into your lap, Pisces. January is a month of feeling like you have everything you need in your life, and like there is enough love to go around. You have an upper hand this month and it’s your faith in yourself and the universe that has got you here. You know that everything happens for a reason and what’s yours won’t pass you by, and you are feeling this knowing strongly this month.
January begins with a Full Moon in fellow water sign Cancer on January 6th, and this Full Moon is occurring in a zone that directly connects to the heart. Your heart is seeing clearly in January, and you like what you are seeing right now. Allow yourself to be loved the way you deserve to be, and trust that this love is here to stay. Before the month ends Venus enters Pisces, and relationship growth takes place. Venus in your sign makes everyone a little more emotional than usual, and you are leaving the month feeling seen, heard, and understood.
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So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.
In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.
In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.
And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.
We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.
So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.
That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.
This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
Featured image by xoStaff
It’s not like it has to be a bad thing. In fact, studies say that somewhere around 15 percent of engaged couples actually met through a friend. All I’m saying is, before you entertain someone’s “I’ve got someone I want you to meet” invitation, it would benefit you to interview them first — for the sake of all parties involved.
The questions that I recommend asking? The following six are what I think can get everyone on the same page, so that there is more pleasure than regret from the hook-up attempt.
1. Why Are They So Invested?
GiphyTwo things that I recently watched over again are the series Survivor’s Remorse (the writing is so damn good) and a movie called Trapped in Temptation (both are currently on Tubi). Something that both of them made me think about is the fact that motive reveals a lot when it comes to why people say and do the things that they do.
When it comes to the movie, specifically, without giving the film away — let me just say that, if you are in a relationship, be really careful about listening to individuals who try to talk you out of maintaining it. More times than not, the motive is shady as hell. And honestly, sometimes people who are close to obsessed with you being in one deserve a bit of side-eye too.
Now, if it’s someone who loves all things love, they are in love and they want you to experience something similar — that’s sweet. Just make sure that they are approaching the set up from a healthy space. What I mean by that is they don’t see singleness as some sort of relational handicap or they aren’t trying to override what you want for your life as if they somehow know better (there are so many ways to be a control freak, y’all).
Hmph. Now that I think about it — make sure that the set-up crew isn’t trying to use you to “save” some male friend or relative of theirs. I say that because I once knew a mother whose son had — count ‘em — 10 kids and she was FOREVER trying to get me to date him. Girl, that wasn’t for me. She was looking for a Holy Ghost Jr. for that child of hers. I’ll pass. HARD PASS.
Bottom line with this one — if someone wants to set you up with someone else, the first thing to ask is why? Make sure to really listen to what their answer is. Then pay attention to if your mind, body and spirit are at peace with their answer(s).
2. Do They Know What You Want?
GiphyI don’t know about y’all, but the people (and let’s be honest, by far, it’s usually women) who have tried to set me up with someone? They didn’t even know what my preferences or type was. Hell, they didn’t even know my thoughts or timeline as it relates to being in a serious relationship were either. And what that boils down to is they were trying to hook me up based on their agenda, not mine — and that usually meant that the guys who they came up with? Yeah…I was good on them. LOL.
Yeah, if someone wants to hook you up, you definitely should ask them if they know what you are looking for in a guy when it comes to his looks, personality, passions, spirituality, relational desires and goals, location, etc. Because, indeed, what is the point in going out with someone who is fine as hell and yet, you want kids and he doesn’t (or vice versa) or who has a great personality yet he isn’t even in the same ballpark of your spiritual beliefs?
If your friend really wants to help you out, valuing your time should come with that — and that means bringing someone into your life who complements your lifestyle. No wiggle room here.
3. Are They Aware of Your Deal-Breakers?
GiphyLast year, I wrote an article for the platform entitled, “Should Bad Sex Actually Be A Relationship Deal-Breaker?” The thing that I think needs to go on record about deal-breakers is they aren’t exactly standards that you have. No, a deal-breaker is something that can’t be worked out even after trying to negotiate or compromise. When it comes to relationships, a deal-breaker might be how long two people should date before becoming exclusive or getting engaged. Another deal-breaker might be if being religious is more important than being spiritual and how that manifests itself (church or no church, etc.). And yes, another deal-breaker may be what each other’s sexual needs and expectations are.
When someone is setting you up, it is imperative that they know about your standards. For instance, for me, I am not interested in dating a divorced person, pretty much ever (I Corinthians 7:10-11). I’ve had friends who have tried to hook me up with that demographic before and it has always been a moot effort. The fact that some of them have gotten frustrated with my convictions has absolutely nothing to do with me. Some have tried to get me to compromise my deal-breakers too — like a long-distance relationship. Is it a firm “naw”? No. However, it’s not really something that I am interested in, so why not just…recommend someone local?
Yeah, if someone thinks that they know you well enough to hook you up, they absolutely should be well-versed in what your deal-breakers are before they do. And if they’ve never asked, all they are doing is assuming — and we know what that typically means. LOL.
4. What Is Their Track Record?
GiphyIt’s kind of wild that we now live in a time when more couples meet online than they do through “old-fashioned ways” like via their friends (although some reports say that Gen Z is getting back to that) — and yet, here we are. Still, if you are willing to let someone play pseudo matchmaker in your life, you are well within your rights to inquire about their track record in that department. Have they hooked others up, successfully, before? Has any of their “Cupid work” caused both people to get exactly what they wanted out of the situation? If/when things went awry, why was that?
I know someone who is constantly trying to hook people up. Thing is, maybe 10-15 percent (no joke) of their efforts have proven to be positive and fruitful — and we’re talking about close to close to two decades of them doing it. Listen, time is too precious to be out here doing stuff ONLY to please other people. That said, if someone wants you to devote some time to one of their grand ideas, you are well within your rights to ask about their past and current success score when it comes to it.
5. Can They Keep Their Own Feelings Out of It?
GiphyWanna know if someone who is offering to do something for you is actually doing it more for themselves? If they try to make it be about them when things don’t go the way they would like, that is a dead ringer. An example? They post a message about you on social media and then question you about why you didn’t do the same thing in return. Another example? They do something for you and then throw it in your face during an argument. Still another example? They set you up with someone, it doesn’t work out, and suddenly you’ve put them in a weird spot. No dear — you put your own self in that position by trying to hook two people up in the first place.
I promise you, it will spare everyone unnecessary energy spent (or even drama experienced) if, before you agree to be hooked up, you get the matchmaker on record stating that they will keep their emotions out of it as much as possible. MEANING — they will do the introductions and then let the chips fall where they may. If they can’t do this, my two cents (save it or spend it) would be to decline the offer. Because all you need is someone texting you about why you haven’t called their cousin back or having an attitude with you when you break up with some guy at their church who they thought was the perfect catch (P.S. These aren’t hypothetical examples — LOL).
6. Will They Respect Your Boundaries? Start to Finish?
GiphyYeah, this final one is a biggie. Just because someone sets you up with another person, that doesn’t automatically or necessarily mean that they should have the right to the details of the dynamic. I don’t care if it’s the first date or the 10th date. I don’t care if you decide to just be sex buddies or to have a full-blown relationship. I don’t care if you stay together or break-up — it’s your relationship which makes it your business. Whatever you share is privileged data.
Yeah, I would say that probably the most challenging thing about being hooked up by someone you know is they have a tendency to think that they are a part of the relationship too — and that is a lie. If things go well beyond a couple of dates, you and the guy should discuss what you will both share with the person who introduced you and then agree to stick to that boundary, no matter what. It’s a great way to protect the dynamic, to keep “outside voices” from influencing the growth and to navigate how you want to move, moving forward.
Someone who hooked you up for the right reasons and knows how to honor limits? They will understand. Will they ask questions? Absolutely. Will they pry? Nah.
___
Should you sit and let someone hook you up? I mean, you never know how your blessing will come. Just make sure that they are prepared for you to do some digging into their mindset before they start sweetly meddling into your love life.
It’s only fair. Hell, and right. LOL.
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