What The Ciara’s, Cassie’s & Karrueche's Of The World Have Shown Us About Moving On & Moving Up
I have to admit, I'm not someone who obsesses over or relies heavily on celebrity hook-ups, marriages, and love stories as a guide for my own relationships, considering the fact that their lifestyles are quite different from mine. Not to mention, you never truly know what goes on behind closed doors -- whether they're famous or not.
However, we're often reminded of the fact that celebrities are human beings just like us. At times, and unfortunately at their expense, we witness their heartache, loss, and drama for all the world to see. But just as much as we cry and empathize when celebrities experience tough times, we also celebrate when we see them overcoming obstacles, relishing in their success, or even enjoying a new chance at love. Case in point:
Ciara walked away from what she thought was her future, and in walked the love of her life through Russell Wilson.
Karrueche's ex tried desperately to get her attention, but now she's the center of attention -- on-screen and off with former baller Victor Cruz.
Cassie was with Diddy, but now she's blessed to be with child with her new beau Alex Fine.
Hence, from the outside looking in, there is so much we can learn from these ladies' experiences (and so many other non-celebrities including myself) and their willingness to move on.
1.For every man that won’t, there’s another one that will.
I think we can all agree that Russell Wilson was more than ready and willing to be (and do) for Ciara what her exes weren't willing to be. He appears to not only be good to her but good for her. The same is likely true for Cassie and Karrueche…at least I know it was for me when I met my husband also. I've said it a million times, but it's so true: if a man wants to be with you, then he'll be with you. Period.
2.Be courageous enough to walk away knowing that another will come along to stay.
A good man can't occupy space in your life if it's already taken by someone else. Society and statistics will tell you that the odds are stacked against you, and the ratio of women to men makes it nearly impossible to experience true love with a good man. However, don't let societal pressures or the fear of being alone keep you trapped in a toxic relationship just for the sake of saying that you're in a relationship. With God, anything is possible. Besides, as black women (and men), we've been defying statistics since the beginning of time.
3.“But I’ve invested so much time in the relationship” is not a legitimate excuse to remain in a toxic relationship that no longer serves you.
Comfort and convenience aren't substitutes for love. Just because it's comfortable to you doesn't mean it's purposeful for you.
When it no longer serves a purpose for your life, it then becomes a waste of time – for you and the other person. Life is too short to be wasting it on people and things that are toxic to your life. Just like with any financial investment, if it no longer provides a positive return, then it's time to move your money. Similarly, if the relationship no longer provides positive results for your life, then it may be time to move on…just like Ciara, Cassie, and Karrueche did.
4.You can find the good in goodbye.
I know I'm not the only one who can look back and say to myself, "had I stayed…," or "thank goodness that ended," or "I dodged a bullet." There's a liberating feeling knowing that what you once thought was the best thing in your life became the best thing when it was actually removed from your life. You never know – your new and better beginning could be on the other side of that painful ending.
Related: How To Find The Good In Goodbye
5.Sometimes the very thing (or person) you’re holding onto is the very thing that’s holding you back.
Erykah Badu said it best: "Bag lady, you gone hurt your back. Dragging all those bags like that." It's that baggage and dead weight that keep us bound to toxic people and relationships. As my dear friend Natalie once told me, "Some people are tied to your dysfunction, not your destiny." Hence, sometimes people have to walk away in order for you to walk into your destiny.
6.Whoever you give your heart to, make sure they’re ready and have the capacity to receive it.
We are often disappointed when we give our hearts to those who never asked for it. Some people aren't ready for, nor do they deserve, all the love you have to give. The one who is ready and willing to receive your love, will be ready and willing to show you love.
7.“God is never late.”
Timing is everything to us, but there's a quote that says, "God doesn't wear a watch." His timing isn't like ours…and truth be told, we're not always prepared for what we ask for. Nevertheless, we have to trust that even if what we pray for doesn't happen exactly when or how we expect it to, God can still provide exactly what we need, when we need it.
8.You’ll know a man is no longer interested in playing games when it’s obvious he’s not playing with your heart.
There's a difference between a man who only says he's sorry and a man whose words are supported by his actions. Changed behavior is the evidence of a real apology. Moreover, a man after God's heart will take care of yours.
9.For every heartache experienced, God can heal you that much more.
I'm sure at some point Ciara, Cassie, and Karrueche probably thought "when will the tears subside," or "when will this heartache end." It's difficult to see the light when you're in it, but the sun always finds a way to shine after the rain. I can imagine that for them, as it has been for me, their past hurt eventually became like a distant memory once they were able to move on and heal.
10.When we release old stuff, it creates space for something new.
Whether people are removed from our lives by force or choice, it frees up space around us and within us – physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. No longer are we considered "emotionally unavailable;" rather, the extra space opens ourselves to receive and experience more of what God has for us.
Nobody truly knows what the future holds for Ciara, Cassie, or Karrueche (or anyone for that matter), but while they're in this winning season, let's continue cheering them on from the sidelines. May their stories, as well as so many others, serve as hope and inspiration to live your best, purposeful life despite your past hurts, and more importantly, regardless of your relationship status.
Featured image by DFree / Shutterstock.com
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Shonda Brown White is a bestselling author, blogger, life coach, and brand strategist. When she's not jumping out of a plane or zip lining, she's living the married life with her husband in Atlanta, GA. Connect with her on social @ShondaBWhite and her empowering real talk on her blog.
There’s just something about HBCU Homecoming that just hits different. Whether it’s your first time stepping onto the yard since graduation or you’re a regular at every Homecoming tailgate, HBCU pride is undeniable. It’s a vibrant celebration that unites the legacy of excellence and tradition with the energy and resilience of Black culture.
The experience goes beyond a typical college reunion; HBCU Homecoming is a family reunion, a fashion show, a cultural festival, and a week-long turn-up that embodies what it means to be unapologetically Black and educated. For HBCU alumni, the journey back to the yard each year is rooted in a love and pride that’s hard to put into words but impossible to deny.
From statement pieces to tech must-haves, every item represents the intersection of Black pride and HBCU love, ensuring that you show up to the yard in style and with intention. So whether you’re repping your alma mater for the first time since graduation or looking for fresh pieces to express your HBCU pride, these essentials will have you standing out, because, at HBCU Homecoming, it’s not just about showing up—it’s about showing out.
Thread Goals
diarrablu Jant Pants in Alia Noir
High-waisted, wide-legged, and ready to shut down the yard, the Jant Pants by diarrablu bring a whole new meaning to campus chic. Handcrafted in Dakar, Senegal, these free-flowing jacquard pants are perfect for stepping onto the yard with style and ease—making them a must-have for any HBCU alum’s closet.
Silver & Riley Convertible Executive Leather Bag Classic Size in Olive
This all-in-one luxury bag isn’t a bestseller for nothing. The Silver & Riley essential is made of Italian calfskin leather and thoughtfully designed, as it can be worn in four different ways: a shoulder bag, crossbody, a top handle, and a backpack. Chic and elegant, the Convertible Executive Leather bag is “the bag that every woman needs in her collection.”
Renowned Women's Intuition Cotton Graphic T-Shirt
Renowned
Renowned’s Women’s Intuition Cotton Graphic T-shirt features a bold graphic print inspired by the power and essence of women’s intuition. With its striking design, this all-cotton tee is a vibrant thing, making it a statement piece that celebrates feminine energy.
Mifland Million M Mesh Crop Shirt
Talk about bold, the Million M Mesh Crop Shirt combines edgy style with comfort, featuring Mifland’s signature print on a semi-see-through mesh fabric. Show up and show out in sophisticated flair.
HBCU Love FUBU
Melanin Is Life Melanated & Educated - I Love My HBCU Hoodie
Show off your HBCU love with this piece that represents everything you gained from your alma mater: a top-tier education, a community that lifts you up, and a deep sense of esteem for yourself and your culture. Wear it loud and proud, because being melanated and educated isn’t just a flex—it’s a legacy.
HBCU Culture Spelmanite Sweatshirt in Navy
Spelmanites, rep your Spelman pride with this unisex crewneck sweatshirt, designed for ultimate comfort and a relaxed fit. Made from a cozy cotton/polyester blend, this classic sweatshirt is as durable as it is stylish—making it an ideal piece for any Spelmanite showing love for their alma mater.
HBCU Culture Howard Is The Culture T-Shirt
Rock the ultimate flex by showcasing your Howard U love with HBCU Culture’s Howard Is The Culture t-shirt. This unisex tee offers a comfortable, relaxed fit that’s perfect for celebrating your HBCU spirit without sacrificing style or comfort.
DungeonForward FAMU - Strike Bucket - Reversible
DungeonForward’s Strike Bucket Hat brings versatility and style to the FAMU Crown collection with its reversible design, giving you two looks in one. Featuring a sleek black snakeskin-embossed brim lining and a bold outline Rattler emblem, this hat is all about repping your Rattler pride in style.
DungeonForward Savannah State University - HBCU Hat - TheYard
The Savannah State University HBCU Hat by DungeonForward is more than just a hat—it’s a symbol of Tiger pride and a nod to the culture. Perfect for gamedays, tailgates, or just showing off your HBCU love, this hat lets you carry a piece of the yard wherever you go.
Tech the Halls
Anker iPhone 16 Portable Charger, Nano Power Bank
Stay charged up with the Anker Nano Power Bank, which features dual USB-C ports, a foldable connector, and a compact design, making it perfect for those HBCU tailgates and late-night parties you pull up to.
Drip Check
Wisdom Frame 14 Square Sunglasses
Elevate your look with these angular square-frame sunglasses by Wisdom, bringing an ultramodern edge to any outfit. The sleek design makes them perfect for blocking out the haters while you stunt on the yard.
Coco and Breezy Eyewear Fortune in Gray Turquoise
The Fortune Glasses in Grey Turquoise is a bold statement piece to any Homecoming weekend ‘fit that “embody our fearless and outspoken DNA.” With their color and edgy design, these frames by Coco and Breezy are perfect for anyone looking to stand out and express their unapologetic confidence.
Howard U Lapel Pin
Rep your Bison pride wherever you go with this Howard U Lapel Pin from Pretty AmbVision. Whether adding it to your jacket, shirt, or bag, this pin is the perfect way to showcase your love for your alma mater while rocking your HBCU love with honor and distinction.
Mifland Standard Rucksack Mini
The Standard Rucksack is designed to evolve like that HBCU pride—getting richer, bolder, and better with time. Durable, stylish, and built to last, this Rucksack by Mifland is a timeless piece equipped with versatile carrying options and fully adjustable back straps for ultimate comfort.
Stay Fresh, Stay Blessed
Slip Pure Silk Sleep Mask in Pink
Keeping it cute starts with beauty sleep. This luxurious silk mask is an essential for a reason. If protecting your skin and waking up refreshed is your priority, look no further than this Homecoming essential.
Liquid I.V.® Hydration Multiplier Lemon Lime - Hydration Powder Packets
Stay hydrated and energized throughout Homecoming weekend with this Liquid I.V.® Hydration Multiplier in Lemon Lime. Just add a packet to your water bottle, and bless your body with 2-3 times more hydration than water with every packet. Because staying hydrated is the key to popping up and showing out all weekend long!
Loop Experience Plus Earplugs High Fidelity Hearing Protection
Designed for your hearing protection, these sleek earplugs reduce noise without compromising sound quality—perfect for enjoying the band’s halftime show, late-night parties, and DJ sets. Whether you’re front row at the step show or hitting the yard, your ears deserve to be protected in style!
Black Girl Magic Glass Cup
Sip in style and celebrate your melanin with the Black Girl Magic Glass Cup. Perfect for morning coffee, your favorite iced drink, or showing off your HBCU pride on the yard—this cup is all about keeping it cute while radiating your endless supply of Black Girl Magic.
Glow Up & Show Out
Black Girl Sunscreen SPF 30
What Homecoming weekend can be complete without an assist from this beauty find? Formulated to blend seamlessly into melanin-rich skin (no white-cast), protect your glow while you turn up with the Black Girl Sunscreen SPF 30.
Sienna Naturals Issa Rae's Wash Day Ritual Set
Issa Rae’s Wash Day Ritual Set from Sienna Naturals includes the H.A.PI. Shampoo, the Plant Power Repair Mask, Dew Magic, and Lock and Seal to get your crown right. Whether you’re repping your coils or rocking a new color on the yard, these products restore and nourish your strands, keeping your hair healthy, strong, and Homecoming-ready!
54 Thrones Ivorian Cocoa + Ghanaian Coconut Beauty Butter
Stay glowing from the tailgate to the after-party with the 54 Thrones Ivorian Cocoa + Ghanaian Coconut Beauty Butter. Infused with African-sourced ingredients, this rich, multi-purpose butter is the answer to keeping your skin soft and radiant through all the festivities all Homecoming long.
Saie Glossybounce Hydrating Lip Oil
Keep your lips looking luscious and nourished with the Saie Glossybounce Hydrating Lip Oil. Perfect for adding an extra pop to your pout before hitting the yard or freshening up between events, this lip oil is a beauty essential for staying camera-ready all weekend.
Join us in celebrating HBCU excellence! Check out our Best In Class hub for inspiring stories, empowering resources, and everything you need to embrace the HBCU experience.
Featured image by Visual Vic/Getty Images
10 Different Ways Herbal Teas Can Fit Into Your Beauty Regimen
Is there ever a season when herbal tea isn’t an excellent option? In my opinion, not really. During the spring and summertime, you can make iced herbal tea, and when it’s fall and winter, there is nothing like a warm cup of tea with a teaspoon of honey (and perhaps a bit of almond or oat milk) in it. And you know what? The truly wonderful thing about all of this is that every time you consume herbal tea because it has lots of herbs in it, it’s something that you can feel good about — from the inside out.
There really is no telling how many tea articles I’ve written for the platform over the years (you can check out a few here, here, and here), yet I’m not sure if I’ve ever mentioned ways that consuming herbal tea can improve your beauty goals. So today, I’m gonna do just that. Below, I’ve got 10 teas that can bring about the best in your natural looks, along with some ways that you can use tea that you may not have ever considered before.
1. Jasmine Tea for Acne
If you want a tea that helps to keep your heart in good shape (which is important for Black women since we have the highest risk for things like hypertension, strokes, heart failure, and coronary heart disease), will help to boost your brain and can lower your risks for certain cancers as well as type 2 diabetes, you definitely should sip on some jasmine tea.
As far as your skin goes, between the antioxidants in it that help to fight off free radicals in your system along with the fact that it contains anti-inflammatory properties, this is why jasmine tea can also be a great dietary addition if you’re looking for an all-natural way to keep breakouts at bay.
Beauty Tea Hack: Make a toner for your skin by steeping two tea bags in a half gallon of water for 15-20 minutes. Add a teaspoon of honey (honey contains anti-inflammatory and antioxidants that can speed up the healing process of pimples) and then let it cool. Add 5-7 drops of tea tree oil and then apply it to your skin after washing it 2-3 times a week.
2. Licorice Root Tea for Hyperpigmentation
During the cold and flu season, pretty much everyone should have some licorice root tea in one of their kitchen cupboards. That’s because it’s been proven to soothe a sore throat, it can bring relief to upper respiratory issues (including asthma-related ones) and it can help to speed up the healing process of bacterial and viral infections.
What can licorice root tea do for you on the beauty tip? Aside from being an all-natural approach to eczema, some studies say that this tea also contains phytochemical properties that can reduce hyperpigmentation. As a bonus, it’s good for preventing tooth decay, which means it can help your smile remain brilliant.
Beauty Tea Hack:Place tea bags over your eyes to reduce eye puffiness and eye circle discoloration over time.
3. White Tea to Slow Down Aging
White tea, green tea, and black tea are all related; what makes them different is how they are processed. That said, white tea is a great tea addition because it is rich in antioxidants, can help to fight off heart disease, is able to reduce free radicals and chronic inflammation, and can also help to prevent cavity-causing bacteria in your mouth, and white tea can even help you to shed a few pounds.
Something else that’s dope about white tea is it has compounds that can slow down the aging signs in your skin. That’s because white tea has chemical compounds known as polyphenols that help to keep the fibers of your skin from being damaged (especially prematurely).
Beauty Tea Hack: Steep 2-3 tea bags, then place your face over the steam so that your skin can absorb the moisture as well as the properties that are within the tea.
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4. Rooibos Tea for Hair Follicle Strength
If you like your tea to have a robust taste to it, rooibos is what you’re looking for. A tea that hails from South Africa, rooibos is bomb because it’s caffeine-free, contains the type of antioxidants that reduce free radicals and heart disease, can help to keep your blood sugar where it needs to be, and can also help with digestion-related issues.
Something else that I should mention about this particular tea is if you happen to be anemic (or borderline anemic), this tea is also a good option for you because it’s low in tannins. Since tannins can sometimes affect how your body absorbs iron, if low iron is a personal health concern, you want to select a type of tea where that won’t be an issue for you.
This tea is a nice beauty addition because it also contains ingredients that can help to soften the appearance of wrinkles; plus it has been proven to keep your hair follicles in good condition so that you can maintain more length retention.
Beauty Tea Hack:3-Ingredient Hair Tea Recipe
5. Black Tea for Hair Color Depth
Speaking of hair health, if that is what you’re after, you also need to add black tea to your collection. Let’s address some other health benefits that it brings first, though. What makes black tea different from, say, green or white tea is it goes through a pretty intense oxidation process. The end result is the kind of tea that is very dark in color and, again, is rich in antioxidants. It’s also the type of tea that is good for your heart, can help to reduce your risk of having a stroke, can increase longevity, and contains the kind of amino acids that make it easier to concentrate and be more productive throughout the day.
And just why will your hair appreciate black tea so much? Well, studies reveal that the caffeine in the tea can help to block the hormones that are directly associated with hair shedding and loss. Not only that, but if you’re looking to darken your hair color (in a subtle kind of way), black tea is an awesome all-natural hair rinse. I’ve tried it before. I’ll vouch for it in this lane.
Beauty Tea Hack:Hair Tea Rinse Recipe
6. Green Tea for Weak Tooth Enamel
Green tea just might be the most popular tea of all of these. That’s because it contains properties that do everything from helping you lose weight and boost brain power to lowering the risk of lung, breast, and ovarian cancer and increasing your days on this planet. Something else that I really like about green tea is that although it does have caffeine in it, if you happen to feel anxious, research shows that it can actually help to decrease it.
And since a radiant smile completes the look of any woman, if you want to keep your teeth’s enamel strong (which does indeed become an issue as you get older), green tea can help you out. It does this by reducing oral inflammation, strengthening your teeth, helping to prevent gum disease, and even playing a role in remineralizing teeth.
Beauty Tea Hack: DIY Matcha Mouthwash Recipe
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7. Hibiscus Tea for Nail Health
Hibiscus tea literally comes from parts of the hibiscus flower. It’s good for your system because it’s packed with antioxidants, beta-carotene, and properties that help to reduce inflammation as they fight off free radicals, too. If you’ve got some type of bacterial infection, this tea will help to heal it. Hibiscus tea is also great when it comes to helping to lower your cholesterol and blood pressure levels.
Since hibiscus tea is also full of vitamin C, it’s the kind of tea that can help keep your nails nice and strong. The connector here isvitamin C, which is a nutrient that helps to produce collagen within your system, and collagen is a protein that keeps your nails from breaking.
Beauty Tea Hack: Learn how to use a tea bag to “fix” a split nail (I’m not kidding) here.
8. Dandelion Root Tea to Detoxify
If you’ve always wondered if dandelion root tea is as literal as it sounds, the answer is yes. It is made from the dandelion weeds that grow in your yard — and yes, they can be very good for you. Dandelion tea is a good source of vitamins A, C, K, folate, calcium, and potassium. It also has antioxidants that reduce oxidative stress. If you’re looking to lower your blood pressure or blood sugar, dandelion root tea can support you there. It’s also the kind of tea that helps to strengthen your immune system, keep your bones strong, relieve constipation, and support any weight loss goals that you may have.
Beauty-wise, dandelion root tea can reduce some of the fat that is stored around your liver, which makes it a solid detoxifying tea. And when your system is “clean,” that causes your skin to experience fewer breakouts, UV damage, and premature aging — for the record, dandelion root tea is known for assisting with these three things too.
Beauty Tea Hack: 49 Tea Detox Recipes
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9. Chamomile Tea for Stress
Got digestive issues? Drink some chamomile tea. Feeling nauseated? Drink some chamomile tea. Dealing with PMS symptoms that are absolutely driving you up the wall? Drink some chamomile tea. Got some common cold symptoms that won’t seem to go away? Drink some chamomile tea. Yeah, chamomile tea is the kind of herbal tea that is “all things” on so many levels.
Since it’s also a tea that can keep your skin from becoming dehydrated, promotes sound sleep, andit can keep your stress levels at bay — yes, chamomile is another “beauty tea.”The breakdown here is stress increases inflammation, decreases oxygen levels in your body, and can damage your cells and tissues. So, the less stressed out you are, the more youthful you will appear. So yes, sis, drink up!
Beauty Tea Hack: Honey Chamomile Tea Latte Recipe
10. Passionflower for Sleep
It really is kinda wild that if you want to experience uninterrupted sleep, you should stop drinking about two hours before bedtime. At the same time, enjoying a warm cup of herbal tea can give you some of the best rest ever thanks to the amino acid known as L-Theanine that’s in it; that’s because it has the ability to tell your brain to relax and de-stress. And if that tea happens to be passionflower, even better because it also reduces pain and bodily discomfort while also elevating your melatonin levels.
And since 6-8 hours of consistent sleep helps to do things like rebuild body cells, regulate your hormones, help to prevent (premature) fine lines and wrinkles, reduce dark circles underneath your eyes, and even give your complexion a natural glow — if you want to look your best, rest. And if you need help resting, it’s passionflower to the rescue. Tonight.
Beauty Tea Hack:DIY Sleep Time Herbal Tea Recipe
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Hmph. As if you actually needed another reason to drink some herbal tea, right? And yet — here they are. So, the next time you pull out an herbal tea bag, think about how it’s not just comforting your soul, but it’s making you more beautiful too.
As you can see, yes, very much so on the literal tip.
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Featured image by Willie B. Thomas/Getty Images