How To Set Boundaries With Your Family Members About Your Mental Health
As a culture, the conversation surrounding African-Americans openly discussing therapy, mental health, and mental illness is fairly new. According to a study on Mental Health America, the stigma and judgment prevents Black/African-Americans from seeking treatment for their mental illnesses. It also indicates that Black/African-Americans believe that mild depression or anxiety would be considered "crazy" in their social circles. In tandem with that, many African-Americans find that discussions about mental illness would not be appropriate among our family members and that they'd fall on deaf ears.
Our parents are the generation of what goes on in our house stays in our house; meanwhile, their millennial children are openly tweeting about their therapy sessions. While there's freedom in owning your experiences, our families aren't always welcoming to how we heal out loud. If you find yourself struggling with setting boundaries with your family members, keep these self-care reminders with you.
Don’t argue with relatives that don’t see the value in therapy.
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To understand the nonchalant attitude towards therapy, you have to hold space for the fear and distrust of doctors for African-Americans that dates back to the Tuskegee syphilis experiment, and current health disparities that we face. Many people don't trust their primary doctors, let alone a psychologist. Being of a different generation, we have the privilege of seeing doctors in a light that our parents and grandparents don't, so you have to be mindful of the reality that while they might reject therapy because they don't understand, it could also very well be their trauma talking. You need to be mindful that you're not just talking to your relatives, you're talking to the generations that came before them that all but drilled in their heads how strong they had to be.
Remind them that therapy is not just for times of crisis, many people use it as a maintenance.
Contrary to what we as a culture can often assume, therapy isn't just something that we should explore when we're in crisis, you can (and should) 100% go just for self-care. My therapist is someone that I enjoy talking to; we discuss ways to strengthen my relationships, healthy coping mechanisms, and she shares tools with me to overall help me navigate life. I like to look at it from this perspective, if you're ill, you see your doctor more, but once you're in recovery, your check-ups aren't as often; that's how I view my relationship with my therapist.
Note to self: You don’t have to go home and tell your family what your therapist thinks about your childhood.
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One of my favorite episodes of Girlfriends was when Toni brought her mom to therapy and had her white therapist explain to her mother all of the issues she had with her. Her therapist suggested that she write a letter to her mother as a mental exercise, and she took it a step further and invited her mother to her next session to tell her how she felt in the flesh. While it made for comic relief, seeing Jennifer Lewis give that white lady and her daughter the business, the reality is that the work you do in therapy is for you. Conversations with your parents at some point where you share how your childhood trauma has impacted you can be helpful, but that shouldn't be the goal going into therapy, your healing should be.
Remember that your perspective is valid.
You'll often find that beyond healing from trauma, you'll leave therapy unlearning and seeing the world differently than your parents and ready to educate them on your newfound ideas of the world, all to be shut down at the dinner table. Despite how they may report back to you, remember that your perspective, emotions, and experiences are valid. Embrace the newness that comes with your growth, and allow yourself to feel every emotion attached to your healing process - even if they don't understand it, or you.
Take judgment off the table as you unlearn.
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Our families didn't have the privilege to explore mental health awareness the way we do, so it's imperative to practice mindfulness and realize that the very people that you're judging, see the world differently because of their lack of resources. As you explore inner child healing, you'll soon realize that your parents/family members are just people who like you are trying to understand and unlearn as they grow.
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Dubbed one of the "21 Black Women Wellness Influencers You Should Follow" by Black + Well, Yasmine Jameelah continues to leave her digital footprint across platforms ranging from Forever 21 Plus, Vaseline, and R29 Unbothered discussing all things healing and body positivity. As a journalist, her writing can be found on sites such as Blavity, Blacklove.com, and xoNecole. Jameelah is also known for her work shattering unconventional stigmas surrounding wellness through her various mediums, including her company Transparent Black Girl. Find Yasmine @YasmineJameelah across all platforms.
There’s just something about HBCU Homecoming that just hits different. Whether it’s your first time stepping onto the yard since graduation or you’re a regular at every Homecoming tailgate, HBCU pride is undeniable. It’s a vibrant celebration that unites the legacy of excellence and tradition with the energy and resilience of Black culture.
The experience goes beyond a typical college reunion; HBCU Homecoming is a family reunion, a fashion show, a cultural festival, and a week-long turn-up that embodies what it means to be unapologetically Black and educated. For HBCU alumni, the journey back to the yard each year is rooted in a love and pride that’s hard to put into words but impossible to deny.
From statement pieces to tech must-haves, every item represents the intersection of Black pride and HBCU love, ensuring that you show up to the yard in style and with intention. So whether you’re repping your alma mater for the first time since graduation or looking for fresh pieces to express your HBCU pride, these essentials will have you standing out, because, at HBCU Homecoming, it’s not just about showing up—it’s about showing out.
Thread Goals
diarrablu Jant Pants in Alia Noir
High-waisted, wide-legged, and ready to shut down the yard, the Jant Pants by diarrablu bring a whole new meaning to campus chic. Handcrafted in Dakar, Senegal, these free-flowing jacquard pants are perfect for stepping onto the yard with style and ease—making them a must-have for any HBCU alum’s closet.
Silver & Riley Convertible Executive Leather Bag Classic Size in Olive
This all-in-one luxury bag isn’t a bestseller for nothing. The Silver & Riley essential is made of Italian calfskin leather and thoughtfully designed, as it can be worn in four different ways: a shoulder bag, crossbody, a top handle, and a backpack. Chic and elegant, the Convertible Executive Leather bag is “the bag that every woman needs in her collection.”
Renowned Women's Intuition Cotton Graphic T-Shirt
Renowned
Renowned’s Women’s Intuition Cotton Graphic T-shirt features a bold graphic print inspired by the power and essence of women’s intuition. With its striking design, this all-cotton tee is a vibrant thing, making it a statement piece that celebrates feminine energy.
Mifland Million M Mesh Crop Shirt
Talk about bold, the Million M Mesh Crop Shirt combines edgy style with comfort, featuring Mifland’s signature print on a semi-see-through mesh fabric. Show up and show out in sophisticated flair.
HBCU Love FUBU
Melanin Is Life Melanated & Educated - I Love My HBCU Hoodie
Show off your HBCU love with this piece that represents everything you gained from your alma mater: a top-tier education, a community that lifts you up, and a deep sense of esteem for yourself and your culture. Wear it loud and proud, because being melanated and educated isn’t just a flex—it’s a legacy.
HBCU Culture Spelmanite Sweatshirt in Navy
Spelmanites, rep your Spelman pride with this unisex crewneck sweatshirt, designed for ultimate comfort and a relaxed fit. Made from a cozy cotton/polyester blend, this classic sweatshirt is as durable as it is stylish—making it an ideal piece for any Spelmanite showing love for their alma mater.
HBCU Culture Howard Is The Culture T-Shirt
Rock the ultimate flex by showcasing your Howard U love with HBCU Culture’s Howard Is The Culture t-shirt. This unisex tee offers a comfortable, relaxed fit that’s perfect for celebrating your HBCU spirit without sacrificing style or comfort.
DungeonForward FAMU - Strike Bucket - Reversible
DungeonForward’s Strike Bucket Hat brings versatility and style to the FAMU Crown collection with its reversible design, giving you two looks in one. Featuring a sleek black snakeskin-embossed brim lining and a bold outline Rattler emblem, this hat is all about repping your Rattler pride in style.
DungeonForward Savannah State University - HBCU Hat - TheYard
The Savannah State University HBCU Hat by DungeonForward is more than just a hat—it’s a symbol of Tiger pride and a nod to the culture. Perfect for gamedays, tailgates, or just showing off your HBCU love, this hat lets you carry a piece of the yard wherever you go.
Tech the Halls
Anker iPhone 16 Portable Charger, Nano Power Bank
Stay charged up with the Anker Nano Power Bank, which features dual USB-C ports, a foldable connector, and a compact design, making it perfect for those HBCU tailgates and late-night parties you pull up to.
Drip Check
Wisdom Frame 14 Square Sunglasses
Elevate your look with these angular square-frame sunglasses by Wisdom, bringing an ultramodern edge to any outfit. The sleek design makes them perfect for blocking out the haters while you stunt on the yard.
Coco and Breezy Eyewear Fortune in Gray Turquoise
The Fortune Glasses in Grey Turquoise is a bold statement piece to any Homecoming weekend ‘fit that “embody our fearless and outspoken DNA.” With their color and edgy design, these frames by Coco and Breezy are perfect for anyone looking to stand out and express their unapologetic confidence.
Howard U Lapel Pin
Rep your Bison pride wherever you go with this Howard U Lapel Pin from Pretty AmbVision. Whether adding it to your jacket, shirt, or bag, this pin is the perfect way to showcase your love for your alma mater while rocking your HBCU love with honor and distinction.
Mifland Standard Rucksack Mini
The Standard Rucksack is designed to evolve like that HBCU pride—getting richer, bolder, and better with time. Durable, stylish, and built to last, this Rucksack by Mifland is a timeless piece equipped with versatile carrying options and fully adjustable back straps for ultimate comfort.
Stay Fresh, Stay Blessed
Slip Pure Silk Sleep Mask in Pink
Keeping it cute starts with beauty sleep. This luxurious silk mask is an essential for a reason. If protecting your skin and waking up refreshed is your priority, look no further than this Homecoming essential.
Liquid I.V.® Hydration Multiplier Lemon Lime - Hydration Powder Packets
Stay hydrated and energized throughout Homecoming weekend with this Liquid I.V.® Hydration Multiplier in Lemon Lime. Just add a packet to your water bottle, and bless your body with 2-3 times more hydration than water with every packet. Because staying hydrated is the key to popping up and showing out all weekend long!
Loop Experience Plus Earplugs High Fidelity Hearing Protection
Designed for your hearing protection, these sleek earplugs reduce noise without compromising sound quality—perfect for enjoying the band’s halftime show, late-night parties, and DJ sets. Whether you’re front row at the step show or hitting the yard, your ears deserve to be protected in style!
Black Girl Magic Glass Cup
Sip in style and celebrate your melanin with the Black Girl Magic Glass Cup. Perfect for morning coffee, your favorite iced drink, or showing off your HBCU pride on the yard—this cup is all about keeping it cute while radiating your endless supply of Black Girl Magic.
Glow Up & Show Out
Black Girl Sunscreen SPF 30
What Homecoming weekend can be complete without an assist from this beauty find? Formulated to blend seamlessly into melanin-rich skin (no white-cast), protect your glow while you turn up with the Black Girl Sunscreen SPF 30.
Sienna Naturals Issa Rae's Wash Day Ritual Set
Issa Rae’s Wash Day Ritual Set from Sienna Naturals includes the H.A.PI. Shampoo, the Plant Power Repair Mask, Dew Magic, and Lock and Seal to get your crown right. Whether you’re repping your coils or rocking a new color on the yard, these products restore and nourish your strands, keeping your hair healthy, strong, and Homecoming-ready!
54 Thrones Ivorian Cocoa + Ghanaian Coconut Beauty Butter
Stay glowing from the tailgate to the after-party with the 54 Thrones Ivorian Cocoa + Ghanaian Coconut Beauty Butter. Infused with African-sourced ingredients, this rich, multi-purpose butter is the answer to keeping your skin soft and radiant through all the festivities all Homecoming long.
Saie Glossybounce Hydrating Lip Oil
Keep your lips looking luscious and nourished with the Saie Glossybounce Hydrating Lip Oil. Perfect for adding an extra pop to your pout before hitting the yard or freshening up between events, this lip oil is a beauty essential for staying camera-ready all weekend.
Featured image by Visual Vic/Getty Images
If you’re an introvert at work, just know that’s not as unusual as you might think. In fact, 38% of people say they are either completely introverted (9%) or mostly introverted (29%), according to a recent survey. Research has also found that introverts can have unique advantages over extroverts in the office including being more introspective and thoughtful, having more focus, and are often “gifted” in a specific niche or field.
Those findings alone give introverts bragging rights and should add a boost of confidence, especially if you’re in an office full of big shots who love to boast or people who are a bit more forward with the gift of gab or networking. So if you're part of the introverted gang, here are a few tips on communicating with confidence and authority as your true, authentic winning self:
1. Lean heavily into what makes being an introvert amazing.
As stated above, introverts are definitely always in their own heads, thinking things through and relying on their imagination. Use this to your advantage when speaking up about your ideas and communicating deliverables with your teams in order to fulfill your job duties and bring your amazing ideas to life.
Your attention to detail is a winning skill, so remember that when you're giving a presentation, asking for a promotion, or explaining a process you've upgraded at work. Your thoughtfulness is endearing and valuable, so use it to your advantage.
2. Prioritize intention and impact.
Extroverts might love attention and don't mind being the life of the party (or meeting), but for introverts, make your words count, whether you're speaking them out boldly or with quiet assertion. What do you want people to leave the room thinking? What's your main objective for speaking at the time? Who is your audience, and how can you drive a point without all the bells and whistles of humor or other forced efforts?
Stick to the most important points, back up your points with facts, and let those simple elements speak for themselves. People respect logic, poise, and facts.
3. Allow visuals to be the attention-grabber.
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I'd describe myself as an introverted extrovert in that I don't mind speaking in front of people, but I really don't like forcing engagement if I don't have to. I also love playing the background and I'm super-selective when it comes to my social energy, even in workplace or business situations.
A great way to stand out, though, for me, is to allow something else to serve as an icebreaker or something that introduces me in a positive way before I even speak. For example, I love wearing a brightly colored button-down blouse, dress, or shoe, a chic haircut, an interesting broach, or a tailored suit in a stylish hue or print.
Not only do those things give me confidence to slay a room, but they also signal that I'm someone to notice and respect. I have a signature look that has done wonders when it's time for me to network, lead a demonstration, or speak in front of crowds, and I don't have to put on some act just to seem confident.
If fashion or hair isn't your thing (or you work in an industry where you can't get too creative with those things), allow elements of your presentation or speech to be interesting, striking, well-organized, and visually appealing. Try presenting your ideas in a way that's interactive or animated.
And "interactive" doesn't mean you have to get supertechnical. It can be as simple as asking your team or audience open-ended questions that allow them to share opinions or experiences and create dialogue or using call-and-response methods when appropriate.
4. Add breathing and meditation techniques to your workplace routine.
I oftentimes find that when I have anxiety about speaking, getting all the attention, or interacting with others as an introvert, it's because I'm rushing my thoughts and I'm not as mentally centered as I should be. Breathing a five-minute prayer daily, adding meditation to my lunch breaks, or doing both right before an important meeting or event always helps. I can remind myself of how great I am, my unique talents and skills, and how I don't have to work hard to try to impress someone because I have the skills, knowledge, and abilities as a leader.
I also always remind myself that I am, indeed, worthy of taking up space and being acknowledged in a room and that other people are just as human as I am, no matter their title or status in life.
Try a few different breathing techniques and meditation practices until you find what works for you. And whether it's a deep practice or a bit of quick breath work, it's something to try out in order to quiet your mind and gather your nerves so that you can be at your best.
5. Partner with an extroverted wing woman.
Whether it's your lit cubical mate, project co-lead, or your industry bestie who works for a different company, find opportunities to have someone support you in your efforts to communicate better. This is especially good when it's time to network.
This doesn't mean let them over-talk or outshine you. They're simply someone you can bounce insights off of, talk with in between awkward hellos, or give you that boost of gall you need to go talk to someone solo.
You can feed off of their strengths, and they can feed off of yours in an even exchange. And sometimes, just having them in (or across) the room can be just the small push you need to be yourself while getting the job done.
Being an introvert at work is a superpower, so use that to your advantage. Reflect confidence in your research, fact-gathering, preparation, presentation, professional look, and the type of people you endear yourself to in your professional network. You'll see results and notice that communication in your own authentic way is easier than you think.
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