There are very few things in this life that I adore more than my bed — and I’m not kidding. I actually picked out bedding and decor that would make my bedroom one of my absolute favorite places to be. Hell, even my friends will tell you that I’m good for saying that my bedroom space is like a Six Flags experience for me.
At the same time, what’s kind of weird about all of this is, my chronotype (more on that in just a sec) actually says that I’m most productive in the early morning hours which means that, for better or for worse, I’ve had to condition myself to be more of a morning person than my bed and I would like.
There are some proven perks to making the shift. Aside from the fact that early rising makes it possible to have more time to get more things done in a 24-hour day, there are also studies to support that being a morning person is better for your mental health, helps to lower depression-related symptoms, can make you more energized and productive throughout the day and, some research indicates that it’s better for your overall physical health and well-being too.
For all of these reasons, I thought it would be a good idea to share some tips on how you can become more of a morning person if that’s always been a goal of yours that you happen to struggle with or if you want to try it for a while to see if it truly is a good look. With the help of the following 10 tips/hacks in just a few months (give or take a few weeks), you may find yourself wondering why you weren’t getting up with the sun and the birds years ago.
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1. Know Your Why
Something that I enjoy doing is taking personality tests, and one of the most enlightening ones that I’ve taken in a while is a chronotype one (which I talk about in the article, “Ever Wonder What Personality Traits Make Someone A 'Morning Person'?”). The general concept is we’re each a bear, wolf, lion, or dolphin. What that means is each animal speaks to the time of day when we are the most productive.
Me? I’m a lion, which means that I tend to get the most done before noon, and so when I was trying to be less of a night owl and more of a morning person during a particular season of my life, my motivation was to get enough rest so that I could get up and get more done during the time when my mind and body actually prefer to.
All of this is why I think that the first thing that you need to consider when it comes to becoming more of a morning person is to figure out why you want to do it. With a clear motive and plan in place that can inspire you to get up an hour (or more) earlier because there is a true mission in mind that can make the sacrifice (by definition, a sacrifice is giving up something good for something greater) easier.
2. Change Your Bedroom’s Window Treatments
I can tell you from personal experience that if you’ve got blackout curtains in your bedroom, it’s gonna be chal-leng-ing to try and get up in the morning, no matter how bright it may be outside. That’s because those types of window treatments are designed to keep natural light out.
That’s why, if you truly want to become more of a morning person, another thing that you should do is go with sheer curtains or opened blinds; that way, your body can start to wake up as the sun rises. As a bonus, natural light provides health benefits like a boost of vitamin D, lower stress levels, and a better night’s rest at the end of each day, so it’s kind of a win all the way around.
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3. Create a Morning and Nighttime Routine
While checking out a doctor’s blog on the benefits of creating a life routine, some of the things that he shared is it can reduce stress, make you more efficient, and even cause your life to become more meaningful. If you add to this the fact that a routine can create habits that will last for years to come, it makes a lot of sense that it’s wise to have a morning and nighttime routine.
As far as a morning routine goes, it could be that you pray and/or meditate, journal, sip some herbal tea, go through some affirmations, or take a longer shower so that you start your day off feeling truly refreshed. On the flip side, your nighttime routine can consist of things like soaking in the tub, creating a sleep schedule, reading a book, doing some stretches before getting into bed, verbalizing some things that you are grateful for and that you accomplished throughout the day and listening to some soothing music.
The bottom line here is you rob yourself of enjoying getting out of and into bed (plus, you can throw your sleep rhythm off a bit) if you only jerk yourself out of bed in the morning and/or immediately fall asleep due to sheer exhaustion at night. That said, some tips for how to create and customize your own morning and night routine can be found here.
4. Stop Consuming Stimulants Before Bedtime
Especially as I get older, one habit that I definitely need to break is to stop drinking before going to bed. Why? Because I’m the type of person who, even if I run to the bathroom with all of the lights off in the middle of the night, once I’m awake, I’m up for at least an hour — and that can be annoying as all get out when I’m trying to get back to some quality zzz’s in. If you can relate, it really is best to stop drinking about a couple of hours before turning in.
Oh, and if stimulants like alcohol or coffee are your thing, you should go even longer without those. Alcohol needs to be at least three hours prior to your bedtime, and many health experts say that when it comes to caffeine (yes, your beloved coffee), it should be a whopping eight.
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5. Prep for the Next Day
If a part of what you hate about getting up early in the morning is feeling rushed, there is definitely a workaround for that. You can easily add 30 minutes to your morning window by preparing for the next day the night before. This can include laying out (and ironing) your clothes, preparing your lunch, checking the best GPS travel route, and putting together your to-do list for the following day.
Just knowing that you’ve got your morning organized before turning in can help you to sleep more soundly and wake up in a more relaxed state of mind.
6. Prioritize Something in the Morning (Every Morning)
A part of the reason why some of us don’t consider ourselves to be morning people is because all we see is a day full of work and other obligations before us, and getting up earlier means that we have to do them sooner —and in comparison to staying all comfy and cozy in our bed, the bed is always going to win. That’s why another hack that could help is to prioritize something that you actually enjoy in the morning.
Maybe it’s watching a morning program, getting coffee and a pastry at a local donut shop, or exercising in the early am so that you can knock it out of the way. If you reward yourself for getting up (earlier), that can make it easier to do.
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7. Move Your Bedtime Up (in 15-Minute Increments)
It’s kind of unrealistic to think that you will become a morning person — pardon the pun — overnight. So, one thing that could help you out is to move your bedtime up in 15-minute increments over the next 2-4 weeks or so. In other words, if you typically go to bed at 11 p.m. and you want to start waking up at 5:30 a.m. while still getting no less than seven hours of sleep, this week, go to bed at 10:45 p.m., next week at 10:30 a.m., and so on. That way, changing your sleep schedule won’t feel so drastic, and you’ll be better able to ease into it.
8. Use a Nature Sounds Alarm Setting
Believe it or not, there’s research that indicates that traditional alarm clocks aren’t as beneficial for us as we might think. For one thing, they don’t really “ease” us out of bed; it’s more like they shock us. Plus, just knowing that the sound will go off in the morning can disrupt your sleep patterns. That’s why it’s best to either go with a digital or sunrise alarm or to set your smartphone to make a nature-related sound when it’s time for you to get up (there are also nature sound alarm clocks that you can buy). These options are more soothing to the soul while still being just as effective.
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9. Keep a Sleep Schedule (Even on the Weekends)
I once read an article that said a sleep schedule is all about prioritizing this type of rest. Well, since sleep helps to recharge and rejuvenate your system, regulate your blood sugar, boost your immunity, strengthen your cognitive abilities, reduce your stress levels, maintain a healthy weight, give you more energy, and so much more — sleep is definitely something that you should treat as a paramount practice in your life. And yes, if you want to become a morning person, a sleep schedule can help with that, too.
At the end of the day, creating a sleep schedule is all about incorporating a night routine and also making the effort to go to bed at the same time, each and every night, including the weekends (yep, a sleep schedule has no “cheat” days). If you do this consistently enough, your mind and body will treat your sleep schedule like a pattern/habit — then, before you know it, waking up in the morning will be super natural for you.
10. Choose Your Words Wisely
Last one. I once read a blog post on how to become a morning person. One of the things that it said that stood out was that it’s important to “change your story” because if all you seem to focus on — and declare — is that you are not a morning person, it’s going to be so much harder to change that reality.
You know, there is a good deal of science in these streets to back that negative words give us stress and anxiety while positive thoughts and words can literally alter our reality for the better.
So, if you really want to become a morning person, start believing and declaring that you are one — it might be the most powerful hack of all. Enjoy the shifting, sis. Ultimately, it’s worth it.
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So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.
In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.
In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.
And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.
We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.
So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.
That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.
This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
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It’s not like it has to be a bad thing. In fact, studies say that somewhere around 15 percent of engaged couples actually met through a friend. All I’m saying is, before you entertain someone’s “I’ve got someone I want you to meet” invitation, it would benefit you to interview them first — for the sake of all parties involved.
The questions that I recommend asking? The following six are what I think can get everyone on the same page, so that there is more pleasure than regret from the hook-up attempt.
1. Why Are They So Invested?
GiphyTwo things that I recently watched over again are the series Survivor’s Remorse (the writing is so damn good) and a movie called Trapped in Temptation (both are currently on Tubi). Something that both of them made me think about is the fact that motive reveals a lot when it comes to why people say and do the things that they do.
When it comes to the movie, specifically, without giving the film away — let me just say that, if you are in a relationship, be really careful about listening to individuals who try to talk you out of maintaining it. More times than not, the motive is shady as hell. And honestly, sometimes people who are close to obsessed with you being in one deserve a bit of side-eye too.
Now, if it’s someone who loves all things love, they are in love and they want you to experience something similar — that’s sweet. Just make sure that they are approaching the set up from a healthy space. What I mean by that is they don’t see singleness as some sort of relational handicap or they aren’t trying to override what you want for your life as if they somehow know better (there are so many ways to be a control freak, y’all).
Hmph. Now that I think about it — make sure that the set-up crew isn’t trying to use you to “save” some male friend or relative of theirs. I say that because I once knew a mother whose son had — count ‘em — 10 kids and she was FOREVER trying to get me to date him. Girl, that wasn’t for me. She was looking for a Holy Ghost Jr. for that child of hers. I’ll pass. HARD PASS.
Bottom line with this one — if someone wants to set you up with someone else, the first thing to ask is why? Make sure to really listen to what their answer is. Then pay attention to if your mind, body and spirit are at peace with their answer(s).
2. Do They Know What You Want?
GiphyI don’t know about y’all, but the people (and let’s be honest, by far, it’s usually women) who have tried to set me up with someone? They didn’t even know what my preferences or type was. Hell, they didn’t even know my thoughts or timeline as it relates to being in a serious relationship were either. And what that boils down to is they were trying to hook me up based on their agenda, not mine — and that usually meant that the guys who they came up with? Yeah…I was good on them. LOL.
Yeah, if someone wants to hook you up, you definitely should ask them if they know what you are looking for in a guy when it comes to his looks, personality, passions, spirituality, relational desires and goals, location, etc. Because, indeed, what is the point in going out with someone who is fine as hell and yet, you want kids and he doesn’t (or vice versa) or who has a great personality yet he isn’t even in the same ballpark of your spiritual beliefs?
If your friend really wants to help you out, valuing your time should come with that — and that means bringing someone into your life who complements your lifestyle. No wiggle room here.
3. Are They Aware of Your Deal-Breakers?
GiphyLast year, I wrote an article for the platform entitled, “Should Bad Sex Actually Be A Relationship Deal-Breaker?” The thing that I think needs to go on record about deal-breakers is they aren’t exactly standards that you have. No, a deal-breaker is something that can’t be worked out even after trying to negotiate or compromise. When it comes to relationships, a deal-breaker might be how long two people should date before becoming exclusive or getting engaged. Another deal-breaker might be if being religious is more important than being spiritual and how that manifests itself (church or no church, etc.). And yes, another deal-breaker may be what each other’s sexual needs and expectations are.
When someone is setting you up, it is imperative that they know about your standards. For instance, for me, I am not interested in dating a divorced person, pretty much ever (I Corinthians 7:10-11). I’ve had friends who have tried to hook me up with that demographic before and it has always been a moot effort. The fact that some of them have gotten frustrated with my convictions has absolutely nothing to do with me. Some have tried to get me to compromise my deal-breakers too — like a long-distance relationship. Is it a firm “naw”? No. However, it’s not really something that I am interested in, so why not just…recommend someone local?
Yeah, if someone thinks that they know you well enough to hook you up, they absolutely should be well-versed in what your deal-breakers are before they do. And if they’ve never asked, all they are doing is assuming — and we know what that typically means. LOL.
4. What Is Their Track Record?
GiphyIt’s kind of wild that we now live in a time when more couples meet online than they do through “old-fashioned ways” like via their friends (although some reports say that Gen Z is getting back to that) — and yet, here we are. Still, if you are willing to let someone play pseudo matchmaker in your life, you are well within your rights to inquire about their track record in that department. Have they hooked others up, successfully, before? Has any of their “Cupid work” caused both people to get exactly what they wanted out of the situation? If/when things went awry, why was that?
I know someone who is constantly trying to hook people up. Thing is, maybe 10-15 percent (no joke) of their efforts have proven to be positive and fruitful — and we’re talking about close to close to two decades of them doing it. Listen, time is too precious to be out here doing stuff ONLY to please other people. That said, if someone wants you to devote some time to one of their grand ideas, you are well within your rights to ask about their past and current success score when it comes to it.
5. Can They Keep Their Own Feelings Out of It?
GiphyWanna know if someone who is offering to do something for you is actually doing it more for themselves? If they try to make it be about them when things don’t go the way they would like, that is a dead ringer. An example? They post a message about you on social media and then question you about why you didn’t do the same thing in return. Another example? They do something for you and then throw it in your face during an argument. Still another example? They set you up with someone, it doesn’t work out, and suddenly you’ve put them in a weird spot. No dear — you put your own self in that position by trying to hook two people up in the first place.
I promise you, it will spare everyone unnecessary energy spent (or even drama experienced) if, before you agree to be hooked up, you get the matchmaker on record stating that they will keep their emotions out of it as much as possible. MEANING — they will do the introductions and then let the chips fall where they may. If they can’t do this, my two cents (save it or spend it) would be to decline the offer. Because all you need is someone texting you about why you haven’t called their cousin back or having an attitude with you when you break up with some guy at their church who they thought was the perfect catch (P.S. These aren’t hypothetical examples — LOL).
6. Will They Respect Your Boundaries? Start to Finish?
GiphyYeah, this final one is a biggie. Just because someone sets you up with another person, that doesn’t automatically or necessarily mean that they should have the right to the details of the dynamic. I don’t care if it’s the first date or the 10th date. I don’t care if you decide to just be sex buddies or to have a full-blown relationship. I don’t care if you stay together or break-up — it’s your relationship which makes it your business. Whatever you share is privileged data.
Yeah, I would say that probably the most challenging thing about being hooked up by someone you know is they have a tendency to think that they are a part of the relationship too — and that is a lie. If things go well beyond a couple of dates, you and the guy should discuss what you will both share with the person who introduced you and then agree to stick to that boundary, no matter what. It’s a great way to protect the dynamic, to keep “outside voices” from influencing the growth and to navigate how you want to move, moving forward.
Someone who hooked you up for the right reasons and knows how to honor limits? They will understand. Will they ask questions? Absolutely. Will they pry? Nah.
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Should you sit and let someone hook you up? I mean, you never know how your blessing will come. Just make sure that they are prepared for you to do some digging into their mindset before they start sweetly meddling into your love life.
It’s only fair. Hell, and right. LOL.
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