

Never take for granted the power of a good motivational wordto speak life into your mind and spirit. I know things can get a bit corny and cliche when you see motivational speakers or quotes on social, and maybe you're on that de-motivation train. But sis, it's good to pour into ourselves with positive words, affirmations, and truths.
While I'm not too keen on self-help or the hell-fire preaching type of motivational speeches, I absolutely love wise, encouraging, and thought-provoking insights from women based on their experiences, education, training, relatability, or life stories. For me, it's all about who the message is coming from, the context and energy behind it, and the actual impact the women have made on the world. Here are a few motivational quotes that I often reference when I'm feeling that mid-week slump:
"I don't ever see myself in a position of controlling how other people think or how other people view me... What's most important is how I see myself." —Actress and Educator Phylicia Rashad
"That's how I go into every situation. I treat it as if nothing is impossible, so I don't let anything limit me, let anything stop me, let anything scare me." —Rapper and Producer Megan Thee Stallion
"I hate to lose, but I think losing is what brought me here today...And some of them are extremely painful, but I wouldn't take any of them away because every time I lose, it takes a long time for me to lose again because I learn so much from it. If you lose, learn from it. Don't live in the past. Live in the present. And don't make the same mistakes in the future." —Tennis champion Serena Williams
"We all have an idea of our plan, like, 'This is how it's going to work out.' And then we all see that the plan is not always what we think it will be. ... Never more have I learned to bet on myself. You have to bet on yourself." —TV Host and Journalist, Tamron Hall
"I believe that nobody can be the best you but you. So you might as well show up and show out." —Author, Host and Actress, Bevy Smith
"How I choose to affect change is by speaking up, by being a first, and by being a domino. ... Being the domino for me looks like speaking up and doing the things that are really difficult, especially when they're really needed, with the hope that others will follow suit." —Author and Entrepreneur, Luvvie Ajayi Jones
"And finally I said, 'God loves me.' It still humbles me that this force, which made leaves and fleas and stars and rivers and you, loves me—me, Maya Angelou. It's amazing. I can do anything and I can do it well...any good thing... because God loves me." —Author, Actress and Poet, Maya Angelou
"Give yourself a thousand second chances. Realize that you've got a thousand times to get it right. Life is about practicing and replaying... Life is not about perfection." —Author and Speaker, Lisa Nichols
"Don't hate on yourself. Don't speak negatively about yourself. Don't be your own worst enemy. It's about just having the courage and knowing who you are ... This is a gift. Have the courage. Just do it." —Singer, Author, and Actress, Mary J. Blige
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Westend61/Getty Images
Originally published on May 10, 2023
- 20 Inspirational Quotes That'll Motivate TF Out Of You ›
- Tracee Ellis Ross Breaks Down What ‘Wander, Ponder, And Be’ Means To Her ›
- 20 Quotes About Black Love That Will Make You A True Love Believer ›
- 14 Quotes From Black Feminists To Inspire You To Boss Up ›
- 10 Inspirational Issa Rae Quotes For When You Need Them Most ›
Eva Marcille On Starring In 'Jason’s Lyric Live' & Being An Audacious Black Woman
Eva Marcille has taken her talents to the stage. The model-turned-actress is starring in her first play, Jason’s Lyric Live alongside Allen Payne, K. Michelle, Treach, and others.
The play, produced by Je’Caryous Johnson, is an adaptation of the film, which starred Allen Payne as Jason and Jada Pinkett Smith as Lyric. Allen reprised his role as Jason for the play and Eva plays Lyric.
While speaking to xoNecole, Eva shares that she’s a lot like the beloved 1994 character in many ways. “Lyric is so me. She's the odd flower. A flower nonetheless, but definitely not a peony,” she tells us.
“She's not the average flower you see presented, and so she reminds me of myself. I'm a sunflower, beautiful, but different. And what I loved about her character then, and even more so now, is that she was very sure of herself.
"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Je-Caryous Johnson Entertainment
Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
Overall, Eva hopes that her contribution to the role and the play as a whole serves as motivation for others to reach for the stars.
“I want them to walk out with hope. I want them to re-vision their dreams. Whatever they were. Whatever they are. To re-see them and then have that thing inside of them say, ‘You know what? I'm going to do that. Whatever dream you put on the back burner, go pick it up.
"Whatever dream you've accomplished, make a new dream, but continue to reach for the stars. Continue to reach for what is beyond what people say we can do, especially as [a] Black collective but especially as Black women. When it comes to us and who we are and what we accept and what we're worth, it's not about having seen it before. It's about knowing that I deserve it.”
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image by Leon Bennett/WireImage
Raven-Symoné & Her Wife Miranda Get Real About Intimacy & Why They Sleep In Separate Bedrooms
Raven-Symoné and her wife Miranda Pearman-Maday are proof that doing marriage your way is the only way.
In a recent solo episode of their podcast Tea Time w/ Raven & Miranda, the couple revealed that they've started to share separate bedrooms, and no, it's not because they're having problems. In fact, the decision has actually brought them closer. "Let's normalize it," Miranda said of sleeping in separate bedrooms, calling it a move that improved their relationship and their marriage for the better.
"We really function in better in separate spaces, especially when it comes to sleep," she explained on the podcast. "And I was like, 'We should have separate bedrooms.' And then we can decorate our bedrooms as we want, number one, which is great because you had a different vibe, so we both wanted to have different style of bedrooms. Now we get to have that. And we aren't fucking up each other's sleep schedules. Primarily, you're not fucking mine up, which is getting up at 2 a.m., 4 a.m. Raven, babes, you love to sleep in the reverse orientation."
She wasn't exaggerating either. Raven admitted that she has always had an issue with sleeping in normal orientation, dating back to her childhood. "When I was younger, I've always had a problem with staying in one orientation when I slept. My mom said that she would not like to sleep with me. And I would kick people when I sleep with them. And so I remember when we got engaged. We slept in my old house and you told me that when you woke up, my ass was in your face because I had turned my body around."
"One night, you literally flipped. I thought you were awake because it was so, it was so violent. Like you were sleeping on your side away from me. You flip yourself up and over, you like kinda sit up, and you had no clue where you were because you put your entire ass on my face. Both cheeks were suffocating me. Boom, it was impact," Miranda recalls. "And I was like, this is, this is going to be a challenge."
Suffice it to say, the incident became an issue. One that they needed to find a solution for. "So now," Raven said, "we've decided I'm sleeping in a separate room from you." The compromise? Whenever they need each other, "We text," Miranda added.
Despite where your mind might go when you hear "separate bedrooms" in someone's relationship, the pair assured that the move has helped their intimacy more than it's hindered it. "I will say it has upped my [feels] for you," Raven told Miranda. "There's a little bit of, I believe, in absence makes the heart grow fonder. We work together, we live together, we eat together, we cook together, we drive together. It's like, I'm going to have a little time to myself, and I think that it's actually helping."
Even with the perks of better sleep and better intimacy that have come with their decision to separate their marital bed, Miranda admitted that if someone had suggested to her separate bedrooms a year ago, she would've panicked.
Together since 2015 and married since 2020, Miranda revealed that the would-be solution initially had her questioning, "Does this mean divorce?" But she chalked that up to programming. "I was very much from a space where I was taking my information from heterosexual [relationships], [and feeling like] this is the best way," she said.
Raven also took the conversation deeper, pointing out how many people conflate sex with love, especially when it comes to intimacy. "I also think if you are basing your entire relationship on sex, then you're not really understanding what intimacy is. You're not understanding what deep love is because you can have a deep, loving, intimate relationship with someone and not have sex. Sex is like a cherry on top. You know what I mean? That's like a oooh, it's built up so much I got to release."
She continued, "I don't think sex defines a relationship. I think sex is lustful. And I think that a deep marriage and a deep intimate relationship is where I can literally be just looking at you, and I can be like... And you know what that means."
"And I know what that means," Miranda echoed.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Image Press Agency/NurPhoto/Shutterstock