Although I don’t talk about it much on here, I actually have a platform for Black men, one that I’m about to expand. I come from a Black man. I loved my daddy dearly. Some of my favorite people are Black men. And I don’t believe you can be authentically pro-Black without factoring in Black men. Plus, misandry drives me totally up the wall, so there’s that. And if you factor all of this in along with what I do for a living (work with couples), I end up talking to men a lot. And I mean, A LOT.
Whenever the topic of sex comes up and one of them either damn near goes in while trying to explain what made an experience super mind-blowing, or they share some of the out-of-character things that they did in order to keep a particular woman in their life, something that I will oftentimes ask is, “Lawd, is coochie really that good?" And it never — and I do mean NEVER — fails. Every single time, no matter who the guy is or what the context of the question may be, the answer is always a resounding “Yes!”
From a physical standpoint, when I asked a friend what viscous innards (which is what I’ve heard some guys use to get around saying the “p” word) feels like from a physical standpoint, he paused for a minute and said, “It’s pretty hard to define. Probably the best way to explain it is if you run your tongue along the inside of one of your cheeks. And even that doesn’t do it justice.”
I tried it, and while it did offer me more perspective than I’ve probably ever had about it (from a man’s perspective), I decided to ask several guys to share their thoughts on basically why someone in my world once said, “You girls are sitting on a million dollars and giving it away for a Happy Meal.” With middle names leading the way, here are 12 men who tried their damndest to explain why vaginas, in their eyes, are one of the best things…EVER.
1. William. 31. Married for Three Years.
“Men who say they don’t know when a woman is faking are men who suck at sex. My favorite thing about a vagina is how it involuntarily reacts to stimulation. Its wetness. Its warmth. The way it clutches onto my penis whenever a woman is about to orgasm. It's wild. And then when my wife had our baby, and that same vagina birthed my daughter? Something that brings life in the bedroom and delivery room? Vaginas deserve a standing ovation on an hourly basis.”
2. Christopher. 27. Single.
“Wow. I’ve never been asked this before. Let me think…I think my favorite thing is how comforting a vagina is. Like the moment you enter it, it’s warm, wet, snug — like your penis is getting a hug, and because it’s so sensitive, it’s an erotic hug. Call it corny if you want to, but vaginas make a man feel safe, like no matter what, everything is gonna be alright with the world. Why do you think we run to them when we are stressed out and sh-t?”
3. Prince. 44. Married for 11 Years.
“It’s really sad how so many of the ones with vaginas and then ones who are fortunate to partake of them seem to treat them as nothing more than recreational use. I can only imagine how excited God was at the mere thought of introducing a woman’s body to a man after he vowed to not just enjoy it but protect it — for the rest of his life. Because I’m married, without going too much into detail, what I will say is, if you really value how amazing a vagina is, you’ll get why you should be married to someone who owns one before being worthy of having it. That’s how marvelous it is.”
4. Cal. 36. Single.
“You never know what you’re gonna get. It’s like Christmas. Some are meaty, some are bony. Some have hair, and others don’t. Some have full lips, some thin. Some taste sweeter than others. Some have huge clitorises, and others have ones that are barely there. Some are super tight, and there are those that are a bit looser. It’s exciting every time, and no matter what is going on, you’re gonna find something that you love about all of ‘em. Guys who say that it’s all just p-ssy are liars. The variety is what makes vaginas exceptional. Love that sh-t!”
5. Rogerson. 27. Been in a Long-Term Relationship for One Year.
“There’s nothing like the taste of a [healthy] vagina. It’s got a ‘barely there’ flavor to it that’s subtle but interesting enough that you never want to stop tasting it. And then, because it’s attached to a woman who enjoys it? A guy who won’t go down on you is stupid as f-ck because giving a woman pleasure in that way is like a drug. Hell, when I found out that there are probiotics up in there too? [His partner’s name] will tell you that I probably like to go down on her more than she wants me to. I have an oral fixation for her vagina — there’s nothing that even comes close to how it makes me feel. Let me call her and see what’s up now. Sh-t.”
6. Maxwell. 30. Single.
“I think my favorite thing about a vagina is how much it has in common with the penis: If you’re not cut [he means circumcised], both have foreskin. Both grow when aroused. Both have thousands of nerve endings. Vaginas and penises have so much in common that it’s kind of hilarious that men and women have as much conflict as they do. It’s like sex reminds them, ‘What is all the BS about? You were made to get along. Relax.”
7. Ethen. 39. Engaged One Year.
“Has anyone said how fun it is to figure out what a woman’s favorite kind of orgasm is? With us, there are two speeds: ejaculation and orgasm. Yes, ladies, sometimes we just nut, other times our toes curl. Anyway, for the most part, that’s it for fellas. For women, orgasms are like Baskin Robbins because there are so many ways to make you experience pleasure. That alone makes vaginas a very complex and challenging thing. Many men like challenges…”
8. Azriel. 25. Single.
“I like that you will never get a response out of a woman like you will when you are in her vagina. Whether it’s your mouth, fingers, or YOU, there is a version of her that shows up that you will never see otherwise. I also like how it feels totally different from any other type of her body. Yeah, God was all up in his bag the day he came up with those. Nothing like it in the world. Never has been, never will be.”
9. Zeke. 30. Been in a Long-Term Relationship for Two Years.
“Funny you would ask me this because I was just thinking about this a couple of days ago. We, as men, get bored quickly — I don’t just mean when it comes to women but with life, in general. Know what never gets boring? VAGINAS. No matter how many times you’ve seen one, tasted one, experienced one, you want another go at it. And don’t let it be attached to a dope-ass lady.
"Some of y’all need to get off of TikTok and talk to some actual men. Men don’t cheat because they need new vagina; they cheat because the person with the vagina isn’t working for them. You get someone who likes sex as much as you do and is a peace-filled person — you ain’t gettin’ tired of her or HER. Vaginas were designed to infinitely hold your attention.”
10. Quest. 31. Married for Six Months.
“This is a two-part question because there are vaginas, and then there’s your vagina. Back when I was out here in these streets, what I liked about vaginas was the fact that they are one of the few things that can give you just as much pleasure as you’re giving. I think that’s what makes sex so addicting — you’ve got something that gives and receives crazy pleasure, and so does your partner. And since nothing else even comes close, there lies the hamster wheel.
"Once you get married, though, the vagina that is being shared with no one else becomes almost like a sanctuary. You can run to it knowing that it wants to nurture you — and that creates a level of fulfillment that doesn’t come from being in multiples. Married vagina is where it’s at. You gotta be married to get that, though.”
11. Milo. 42. Recently Engaged.
“Some vaginas feel like you’re visiting while other ones make you feel like you’re at home. It’s hard to explain, but sometimes you will experience one, and it just…fits. A lot of men won’t tell women this, but we factor that in when it comes to who we want to commit to. You can have some of the best stuff in the world, but if it doesn’t make us want to just fall asleep in there, we’ll keep looking. The vagina that you can commit to isn’t just about technique — it has a look, taste, and feeling that is hard to find anywhere else. That’s how I feel about my bae’s. It’s unmatched.”
12. Vernon. 33. Married for Three Years.
“When a woman lets you enter into something as majestic as her vagina, there are no words. Women like to make fun of guys who come quick, but all I ever think is, ‘Yeah, you try staying inside of you for 30 minutes!” The softness, the warmness, the wetness, and then add some movement to it? Vaginas have a power that money, status, and fame will never bring a man. That’s why women should use it wisely, and men should be selective who they enter into. Vaginas have a way of altering people, whether they choose to admit it or not. The wild thing is, I totally believe that they were designed to.”
_____
There you have it — 12 guys sharing what damn near renders them speechless when it comes to our va-jay-jays. It’s enough praise to get off of this thing and do some vaginal mapping, sex journaling, and/or rethinking about if you’re giving your vagina to someone who truly deserves it or not…because these guys have just confirmed that not everyone is worthy, chile. NO, NOT. AT. ALL.
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney & Jill Marie Jones On 'Games Women Play' & Dating Over 40
What do you get when you mix unfiltered truths, high-stakes romance, and a few well-timed one-liners? You get Games Women Play—the sizzling new stage play by Je’Caryous Johnson that’s part relationship rollercoaster, part grown-woman group chat.
With a powerhouse cast that includes Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney, Jill Marie Jones, Carl Payne, Chico Bean, and Brian J. White, the play dives headfirst into the messy, hilarious, and heart-wrenching games people play for love, power, and peace of mind. And the women leading this story? They’re bringing their whole selves to the stage—and leaving nothing behind.
From Script to Spotlight
The road to Games Women Play started over 20 years ago—literally.
“This script was written 20 years ago,” Jill Marie Jones said with a smile. “It was originally called Men, Money & Gold Diggers, and I was in the film version. So when Je’Caryous called me to bring it to the stage, I was like, ‘Let’s go.’” Now reimagined for 2025, the play is updated with sharp dialogue and modern relationship dynamics that feel all too real.
Demetria McKinney, no stranger to Je’Caryous Johnson’s productions, jumped at the opportunity to join the cast once again. “This is my third time working with him,” she shared. “It was an opportunity to stretch. I’d never been directed by Carl Payne before, and the chance to work with talent I admire—Jill, Claudia, Chico—it was a no-brainer.”
Claudia Jordan joked that she originally saw the role as just another check. “I didn’t take it that seriously at first,” she admitted. “But this is my first full-on tour—and now I’ve got a whole new respect for how hard people work in theater. This ain’t easy.”
Modern Love, Stage Left
The play doesn’t hold back when it comes to the messier parts of love. One jaw-dropping moment comes when a live podcast proposal flips into a prenup bombshell—leaving the audience (and the characters) gasping.
Demetria broke it down with honesty. “People don’t ask the real questions when they date. Like, ‘Do you want kids? How do you feel about money?’ These convos aren’t happening, and then everyone’s confused. That moment in the play—it’s real. That happens all the time.”
Jill chimed in, noting how the play speaks to emotional disconnect. “We’re giving each other different tokens of love. Men might offer security and money. Women, we’re giving our hearts. But there’s a disconnect—and that’s where things fall apart.”
And then Claudia, of course, took it all the way there. “These men don’t even want to sign our prenups now!” she laughed. “They want to live the soft life, too. Wearing units, gloss, getting their brows done. We can’t have nothing! Y’all want to be like us? Then get a damn period and go through menopause.”
Dating Over 40: “You Better Come Correct”
When the conversation turned to real-life relationships, all three women lit up. Their experiences dating in their 40s and 50s have given them both clarity—and zero tolerance for games.
“I feel sexier than I’ve ever felt,” said Jill, who proudly turned 50 in January. “I say what I want. I mean what I say. I’m inside my woman, and I’m not apologizing for it.”
Demetria added that dating now comes with deeper self-awareness. “Anybody in my life is there because I want them there. I’ve worked hard to need nobody. But I’m open to love—as long as you keep doing what got me there in the first place.”
For Claudia, the bar is high—and the peace is priceless. “I’ve worked hard for my peace,” she said. “I’m not dating for food. I’m dating because I want to spend time with you. And honestly, if being with you isn’t better than being alone with my candles and fountains and cats? Then no thanks.”
Channeling Strength & Icon Status
Each actress brings something different to the play—but all of them deliver.
“I actually wish I could be messier on stage,” Claudia joked. “But I think about my grandmother—she was born in 1929, couldn’t even vote or buy a house without a man, and didn’t give a damn. She was fearless. That’s where my strength comes from.”
For Jill, the comparisons to her iconic Girlfriends character Toni Childs aren’t far off—but this role gave her a chance to dig deeper. “If you really understood Toni, you’d see how layered she was. And Paisley is the same—misunderstood, but strong. There’s more to her than people see at first glance.”
Demetria, who juggles singing and acting seamlessly, shared that live theater pushes her in a new way. “Every moment on stage counts. You can’t redo anything. It’s a different kind of love and discipline. You have to give the performance away—live, in the moment—and trust that it lands.”
Laughter, Lessons & Black Girl Gems
The show has plenty of laugh-out-loud moments—and the cast isn’t shy about who steals scenes.
“Chico Bean gets a lot of gasps and laughs,” Claudia said. “And Naomi Booker? Every scene she’s in—she’s hilarious.”
But the play isn’t just about humor. It leaves space for reflection—especially for Black women.
“I hope we get back to the foundation of love and communication,” said Demetria. “A lot of us are in protector mode. But that’s turned into survival mode. We’ve lost softness. We’ve lost connection.”
Claudia agreed. “We’re doing it all—but it’s not because we want to be strong all the time. It’s because we have to be. And I just want women to know: You can have peace, you can be soft. But stop bringing your old pain into new love. Don’t let past heartbreak build walls so high that the right person can’t climb over.”
Final Act: Pack the House
If there’s one thing this cast agrees on, it’s that this play isn’t just entertainment—it’s necessary.
“Atlanta is the Black entertainment hub,” Claudia said. “We need y’all to show up for this play. Support the arts. Support each other. Because when we pack the house, we make space for more stories like this.”
Games Women Play is more than a play—it’s a mirror. You’ll see yourself, your friends, your exes, and maybe even your next chapter. So get ready to laugh, reflect, and maybe even heal—because the games are on.
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Patricia "Ms. Pat" Williams has always marched to the beat of her own brutally honest drum — and that’s exactly what makes her so magnetic to watch. Whether she’s making us laugh until we cry on The Ms. Pat Show or now laying down the law on her courtroom series Ms. Pat Settles It, the comedian-turned-judge proves time and again that there’s nobody quite like her. Unfiltered, hilarious, and real to the core, she’s made a name for herself by turning her life’s journey — including the pain — into purpose.
Now in her second season of Ms. Pat Settles It, airing on BET and BET+, she’s not only delivering verdicts — she’s dishing out life lessons in between the laughs. The show feels less like your typical courtroom drama and more like your outspoken auntie running a court session at the family cookout, complete with celebrity jurors, petty disputes, and a whole lot of real talk. xoNecole sat down with Ms. Pat to talk about her wildest cases, balancing motherhood and fame, and why sleeping in separate bedrooms might just be the key to joy.
CASE CLOSED, BUT MAKE IT CHAOS
If you’ve ever tuned in to Ms. Pat Settles It, you already know the episode titles alone deserve awards. But when we asked Ms. Pat which case stood out most, she didn’t even have to think twice. “There was this one woman — Shay — who got out of federal prison and was working for her old bunkmate. But the bunkmate didn’t want to pay her!” she says, chuckling. “That girl came in the courtroom like a firecracker.”
It’s moments like those that remind viewers Ms. Pat isn’t just bringing the laughs — she’s giving people a platform, even if it’s a little messy. And if her court ever gets turned into a real-life franchise, we need Shay on the promo posters immediately.
WHEN THE CELEBS SHOW OUT
It’s already hard enough to get a word in with Ms. Pat running the show, but throw in a celebrity jury featuring Tamar Braxton, Ray J, TS Madison, and Karlous Miller? Whew. “I don’t even try to control them,” she laughs. “Thank God we have something called editing.” According to her, behind the scenes, things get wild — but that chaos is part of the magic. “People only see the cut-down version. What you don’t see is all of us losing it in real time.”
Still, Ms. Pat makes it work. The courtroom becomes a stage, but also a safe space for guests and jurors to show up as their full, unfiltered selves. “It was a wild season,” she explains. Let’s be honest — if your jury looks like a BET Awards afterparty, you might as well let it rock.
IF FAMILY COURT WAS REALLY A THING
Ms. Pat might wear the robe on screen, but at home, she’s still managing her own wild bunch. When asked what kind of case her kids would bring into her courtroom, she burst into laughter. “Oh, they’d be suing my oldest son for eating their food,” she says. “You know how you have that one roommate that eats up everybody’s food? I can see my oldest son getting sued for that..”
And let’s face it, we’ve all either been that sibling or have one. Ms. Pat says moments like that — the everyday family squabbles and real-life irritations — are what make her courtroom show so relatable.
THE VERDICT SHE WISHES SHE COULD REWRITE
Ms. Pat is known for keeping it real, even when the conversation turns serious. When asked if there was one “verdict” in her real life she’d change, she pauses for a second before answering. “I wish I had graduated high school,” she admits. “All my kids went to prom and I took all of their high school diplomas.”
“I wish I had graduated high school,” she admits. “All my kids went to prom and I took all of their high school diplomas.”
It’s a rite of passage in most Black households — your diploma doesn’t really belong to you, it lives at your mama or grandma’s house like a family heirloom.
HOW SHE STAYS GROUNDED
Between filming TV shows, headlining comedy tours, and running a household, Ms. Pat makes it very clear: she will find time to rest. “People swear I don’t sleep, but I do — I just knock out early and wake up early,” she shares. “And sometimes, I’ll just sit in my car.” She’s also a big fan of solo naps and mini getaways when things get overwhelming.
But one of her favorite forms of self-care? Separate bedrooms. “Me and my husband don’t sleep in the same room. That way, when I don’t feel like being bothered, I go to my space,” she laughs. She’s also found a new love for facials. “They’re addicting! I don’t need a lot — just sleep, a facial, and a little quiet.” Honestly? That’s a self-care routine we can get behind.
FROM PAIN TO PURPOSE
Ms. Pat’s story is one that’s deeply rooted in resilience — and she’s always been transparent about how her journey shaped her. Her advice to other Black women trying to turn their pain into purpose? Speak up. “You have to tell your story,” she says. “Because once you tell your story, you realize you’re not the only person that’s been through that situation.”
She adds that sharing your truth can be one of the most powerful things you do. “When you give a voice to pain so many other people who have that pain gravitate to you,” she says. “To heal, you have to speak out loud about it. What you keep inside is what eats you up.” Coming from someone who built an entire brand on truth-telling? We believe her.
WHAT’S NEXT FOR MS. PAT?
While Ms. Pat’s got her hands full with Ms. Pat Settles It and her comedy show, she hints there’s much more to come. “I got some stuff poppin’ that I can’t even talk about yet,” she teases. “But just know, like Kendrick [Lamar] said, we about to step out and show ‘em something.” That multi-genre deal with BET and Paramount is clearly working in her favor — and she’s not slowing down anytime soon.
She says one of her proudest moments in this chapter of her career is seeing things she once dreamed of finally come to life. “In this business, you never know what’s gonna work or what’s gonna stick. But now I’m working with a network that really understands me — and that’s special,” she says. “I feel seen. And I’m just getting started.”
Whether she’s in the courtroom cracking jokes or catching up on rest in her own sanctuary, Ms. Pat is living proof that success doesn’t have to come at the cost of authenticity. She’s rewriting the rules in real time — on her terms, in her voice, and for her people. As she continues to turn pain into purpose, laughter into legacy, and everyday mess into must-see TV, one thing’s clear: Ms. Pat is in her prime. And we’re lucky enough to watch it unfold.
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