

Breaking up is always hard to do.
The dissolution of my last relationship was no doubt one of the most difficult things I've had to do in a minute. But it had to be done.
Love cannot thrive in a space where respect doesn't live.
And no matter how many times the man I loved claimed to love me, the clear and resounding truth was that he had no idea how to truly value me.
I was meek, I was weak, and the harder I held onto him, the more I lost the woman I had worked so hard to become. At the end of the day, it was either him or me, and I finally learned how to be strong enough to make and maintain my decision to stay away from a man that's purpose in my life had been fulfilled.
Nevertheless, the clarity and the peace that I felt soon after allowed me to make no apologies for it. Not a single regret. My sense of self-worth was back in full effect, my self-love was well underway, but my confidence was at an all-time low following the cycle of toxicity and emotional abuse that was my on-again off-again relationship with my ex.
I honestly didn't know what I needed after something like that, aside from alone time, my breakup playlists on repeat, and plenty of journaling and self-reflection. I was putting in the work to return to me, but I still felt somehow out of reach. I had no idea that not having any expectations about what I needed would lead me into the arms of a much younger man.
What's more, I had no idea that he'd come equipped with the exact remedy I needed to reconnect with the self I had lost.
It all started back in July. Our shared birthday weekend was the beginning of a lot of things, namely the spark of our connection. I felt it the moment our eyes met the night before, on the eve of his birthday festivities that a friend, his sister had invited me to. The party before the party. My birthday fell on Sunday and his that Saturday. I had absolutely no birthday plans for my 26th birthday but he had them all for his 20th. How could I say no?
Maybe it was my quarter-life crisis revving up to run wild, but I remembered him as the kid brother of one of my friends that I first met on New Year's Eve two years prior. Back then, he was 18 and I was in the limbo of a relationship so whatever attraction I felt came to an abrupt and speedy halt. But now, a blink away from 20, instead of a red light saying “stop," I only saw “proceed with caution." While we were on the river (celebrating his birthday), I admired his caramel skin and taut body while he walked around shirtless with an air that commanded. And a smile that absolutely dazzled.
At the end of the night, we made our way to a lounge and stole glances at each other across the table. He continued to be very intentional about the way he took me in like I was the glass of water his thirst called for. It was the same one I held in mine. The desire I felt there was too hot to look away. But logic would override my lust that night as we parted ways and he wished me a happy birthday and thanked me for joining him at his. He was too damn young. Little did I know, it was a prelude to our relationship.
I was willing to allow the idea of him to remain a fantasy of what could never be until a couple of days later, I found myself on his couch with his lips at my neck, alternating between kisses and soft bites. I learned what it was that day. I wanted him, but it was more than that. He made me feel desired, like I was the sexiest thing he'd ever laid eyes on. It felt specific and genuine in a way that I didn't know my confidence or my ego needed, but it did.
He kissed me with hunger, and although I wanted to back away from him for the age difference alone, it was something I hadn't experienced in so long. I valued myself and felt valued by other men since my ex for my mind, for my creative, maybe even for my heart – but he added another layer to the wholeness that escaped me. I wanted him because he made me feel wanted.
High as f*ck, hot as f*ck, horny as f*ck – hours later, we made our way upstairs to his bedroom to surrender to the tease we had created for one another.
It was such a turn-on to experience the effect I had on him. I felt so powerful as I took him into my mouth, sucking him into oblivion. He gripped the sheets so hard, arching up into me. He returned the favor, slipping on protection and then entering me. We sighed into each other's mouths, a deep exhale, expletives on our tongues. Sex with him was like letting go. Each thrust was the culmination of gaining something new: relaxation, surrender, rebirth, renewal. It was an awakening and in the wake of being dormant for so long, I was reminded of what it was like to feel alive.
When he orgasmed, it was like music to my ears – the most intoxicating sound. We made out afterwards for what felt like hours before he had enough and decided he wanted more. I giggled to myself. It's quickly become one of my favorite things about him – aside from how womanly he makes me feel – even in moments where he comes too quick, it's made up to me by a second, third, and sometimes fourth round of lovemaking. He's as insatiable as I am.
In the early hours of the morning, he tightens his embrace around me and brings me in closer to him to kiss my back, my neck. He slips his hands between my thighs in effort to initiate wetness where there's warmth. I writhe against him and he breathes against me in anticipation. It isn't as urgent and it doesn't demand. It's a slow dance that builds purposefully into a crescendo of completion. Sometimes we finish together, profuse sweating and heavy breathing. Other times, I finish alone and he taps out involuntarily. We touch ourselves while holding onto our gazes and I come again as I watch him make himself come for me.
The relationship between the two of us has quickly turned into a relationship of convenience with the only strings attached being a couple of guidelines we laid out: open communication and having respect for the other's health. I think he's drawn to me because of the enigma and I'm drawn to him for the thrill. We have a fun, easy-going vibe, have conversations about everything underneath the sun, and overall just have an understanding:
We know what it is, what it isn't, and what it will never be.
One thing's for certain, he has reminded me of who I am during a time where I needed an extra voice and I will always appreciate him for that and for helping me to undo some of the damage I incurred from the man before him. There is an absence of expectation – other than the ones that derive from our mutual pleasure.
We just are.
And whenever I feel a familiar ache between my thighs, I send him a quick text that reads: “Tonight?"
From there, he hits me back with says, “Come thru."
Happily, I oblige.
Have you ever been with a younger guy? What did it do for you? Let me know in the comments down below.
xoNecole is always looking for new voices and empowering stories to add to our platform. If you have an interesting story or personal essay that you'd love to share, we'd love to hear from you. Contact us at submissons@xonecole.com
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Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney & Jill Marie Jones On 'Games Women Play' & Dating Over 40
What do you get when you mix unfiltered truths, high-stakes romance, and a few well-timed one-liners? You get Games Women Play—the sizzling new stage play by Je’Caryous Johnson that’s part relationship rollercoaster, part grown-woman group chat.
With a powerhouse cast that includes Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney, Jill Marie Jones, Carl Payne, Chico Bean, and Brian J. White, the play dives headfirst into the messy, hilarious, and heart-wrenching games people play for love, power, and peace of mind. And the women leading this story? They’re bringing their whole selves to the stage—and leaving nothing behind.
From Script to Spotlight
The road to Games Women Play started over 20 years ago—literally.
“This script was written 20 years ago,” Jill Marie Jones said with a smile. “It was originally called Men, Money & Gold Diggers, and I was in the film version. So when Je’Caryous called me to bring it to the stage, I was like, ‘Let’s go.’” Now reimagined for 2025, the play is updated with sharp dialogue and modern relationship dynamics that feel all too real.
Demetria McKinney, no stranger to Je’Caryous Johnson’s productions, jumped at the opportunity to join the cast once again. “This is my third time working with him,” she shared. “It was an opportunity to stretch. I’d never been directed by Carl Payne before, and the chance to work with talent I admire—Jill, Claudia, Chico—it was a no-brainer.”
Claudia Jordan joked that she originally saw the role as just another check. “I didn’t take it that seriously at first,” she admitted. “But this is my first full-on tour—and now I’ve got a whole new respect for how hard people work in theater. This ain’t easy.”
Modern Love, Stage Left
The play doesn’t hold back when it comes to the messier parts of love. One jaw-dropping moment comes when a live podcast proposal flips into a prenup bombshell—leaving the audience (and the characters) gasping.
Demetria broke it down with honesty. “People don’t ask the real questions when they date. Like, ‘Do you want kids? How do you feel about money?’ These convos aren’t happening, and then everyone’s confused. That moment in the play—it’s real. That happens all the time.”
Jill chimed in, noting how the play speaks to emotional disconnect. “We’re giving each other different tokens of love. Men might offer security and money. Women, we’re giving our hearts. But there’s a disconnect—and that’s where things fall apart.”
And then Claudia, of course, took it all the way there. “These men don’t even want to sign our prenups now!” she laughed. “They want to live the soft life, too. Wearing units, gloss, getting their brows done. We can’t have nothing! Y’all want to be like us? Then get a damn period and go through menopause.”
Dating Over 40: “You Better Come Correct”
When the conversation turned to real-life relationships, all three women lit up. Their experiences dating in their 40s and 50s have given them both clarity—and zero tolerance for games.
“I feel sexier than I’ve ever felt,” said Jill, who proudly turned 50 in January. “I say what I want. I mean what I say. I’m inside my woman, and I’m not apologizing for it.”
Demetria added that dating now comes with deeper self-awareness. “Anybody in my life is there because I want them there. I’ve worked hard to need nobody. But I’m open to love—as long as you keep doing what got me there in the first place.”
For Claudia, the bar is high—and the peace is priceless. “I’ve worked hard for my peace,” she said. “I’m not dating for food. I’m dating because I want to spend time with you. And honestly, if being with you isn’t better than being alone with my candles and fountains and cats? Then no thanks.”
Channeling Strength & Icon Status
Each actress brings something different to the play—but all of them deliver.
“I actually wish I could be messier on stage,” Claudia joked. “But I think about my grandmother—she was born in 1929, couldn’t even vote or buy a house without a man, and didn’t give a damn. She was fearless. That’s where my strength comes from.”
For Jill, the comparisons to her iconic Girlfriends character Toni Childs aren’t far off—but this role gave her a chance to dig deeper. “If you really understood Toni, you’d see how layered she was. And Paisley is the same—misunderstood, but strong. There’s more to her than people see at first glance.”
Demetria, who juggles singing and acting seamlessly, shared that live theater pushes her in a new way. “Every moment on stage counts. You can’t redo anything. It’s a different kind of love and discipline. You have to give the performance away—live, in the moment—and trust that it lands.”
Laughter, Lessons & Black Girl Gems
The show has plenty of laugh-out-loud moments—and the cast isn’t shy about who steals scenes.
“Chico Bean gets a lot of gasps and laughs,” Claudia said. “And Naomi Booker? Every scene she’s in—she’s hilarious.”
But the play isn’t just about humor. It leaves space for reflection—especially for Black women.
“I hope we get back to the foundation of love and communication,” said Demetria. “A lot of us are in protector mode. But that’s turned into survival mode. We’ve lost softness. We’ve lost connection.”
Claudia agreed. “We’re doing it all—but it’s not because we want to be strong all the time. It’s because we have to be. And I just want women to know: You can have peace, you can be soft. But stop bringing your old pain into new love. Don’t let past heartbreak build walls so high that the right person can’t climb over.”
Final Act: Pack the House
If there’s one thing this cast agrees on, it’s that this play isn’t just entertainment—it’s necessary.
“Atlanta is the Black entertainment hub,” Claudia said. “We need y’all to show up for this play. Support the arts. Support each other. Because when we pack the house, we make space for more stories like this.”
Games Women Play is more than a play—it’s a mirror. You’ll see yourself, your friends, your exes, and maybe even your next chapter. So get ready to laugh, reflect, and maybe even heal—because the games are on.
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After Decades-Long Career, Terri J. Vaughn Is Finally The Main Character: Exclusive
Terri J. Vaughn first captured our attention in the late ‘90s as Lovita Alizay Jenkins on The Steve Harvey Show. Decades later, she is starring in her very own series, She The People, which is now available to stream on Netflix.
The political sitcom, which she co-created with Niya Palmer and later teamed up with Tyler Perry Studios, is about a Black woman named Antoinette Dunkerson who runs for lieutenant governor of Mississippi. She wins and becomes the state’s first Black lieutenant governor. Now, she’s forced to balance working with a racist and sexist governor while also trying to keep her family from running amok.
According to the beloved actress, this project was a long time coming. “I’ve been trying to get my own television series for like 20 years, pounding the pavement, meeting with people, getting clothes, being lied to, just a whole bunch of stuff,” she says in an exclusive interview with xoNecole.
“But just keep going, because this is what I do. This is what I love, and I know how important it is for us to continue to show up and make sure that we are seen, make sure that our voices are heard. For several reasons. I just never give up. So here I am, 20 years later, finally sold my show.”
She The People is inspired by the true story of London Breed, who became the first Black female mayor of San Francisco, Terri’s hometown. And to help make the show more authentic, the Cherish the Day actress tapped former Atlanta mayor, Keisha Lance Bottoms to come on as a producer.'“I’ve been trying to get my own television series for like 20 years, pounding the pavement, meeting with people, getting clothes, being lied to, just a whole bunch of stuff."
After bringing the former mayor aboard, it was time to pitch again. And this time, the companies were pitching them. Ultimately, Terri decided to work with Tyler Perry on the series.
“We decided to do it with Tyler for several reasons. I love that. Well, most of the companies we met with were Black-owned companies, but he was the only studio,” she explains. “Tyler is like Walt Disney. That's literally what he is. He has the studio, he has the content. He operates just like Walt Disney.”
And thanks to the cast, the show is nothing short of laughs. The series also stars social media creator Jade Novah as Antoinette’s crazy cousin/ assistant, Shamika, Family Mattersstar Jo Marie Payton as Anotinette’s mom, Cleo, and Terri’s husband, Karon Riley, who plays Michael, her driver and love interest.
While we’ve watched Terri’s career blossom in various ways. From directing to producing, and playing diverse characters, the mom of two says her The Steve Harvey Show character will always be her favorite.
“Well, Lovita was definitely my favorite, especially for my time, the age and everything that I was. Now as a grown ass woman over 50, Antoinette Dunkerson is everything that I've wanted to play. She's everything. She's a mother of two teenagers. She's divorced, so she's co-parenting with her ex-husband. She has to wrangle in a very eclectic family,” she says.
“So I like playing characters that are really flawed and trying to figure it out and doing their best to try to figure it. And she's very flawed and she is trying to figure it out, and she fucks up sometimes. But her heart and what she's trying to do and what her vision is and purpose, it's all for the people. I mean, she the people. She’s for the people, she is the people.”
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