

So, I'm About To Trip You Out With 8 Things That Happen When You Ovulate
Back when I was touring heavily and the topic of my abstinence journey would come up, it never failed that, during the Q&A portion, someone would ask me how they could effectively attempt, at least a few months of being "eggplant free". Something that I would share, consistently so, is "watch who you're around when you're ovulating" — you know, when it's that time of the month when an egg is released from one of your ovaries and it has about 48 hours to be fertilized by somebody's son's sperm (this typically happens around the 14th day if you're on a 28-day menstrual cycle or 4-5 days before or after the midpoint of your period). Why was that my advice?
Simple. I'm thinking that it's pretty common knowledge that, overall, we're the horniest when we're ovulating. So, if you're trying to avoid "giving it up", that would be the time to binge-watch some television, hang out with your platonic homies or take up a new hobby. Here's what's interesting, though. Aside from the fact that your ovulation time can make you more, umm, amorous than usual, there are some other things that can transpire during that semi-intense time of the month too; things that you may not have heard of or considered before.
Are you ready to learn what eight of them are? The answers just might surprise you — and help you to connect a few dots.
1. You’re More Productive
Actually, what inspired me to pen this piece is an article that I checked out on the Independent's website, not too long ago. The title was "Women do their best work when they're ovulating, according to a new study." The rationale is, one thing that happens when we ovulate, is our estrogen levels spike. This, in turn, can cause us to actually get into a better mood and, you already know — the better you feel, the more inclined you are to get more stuff done.
So, if you've got a big project coming up or there's something that you've been putting off for a while that you know needs to get done as soon as possible, waiting until you're ovulating (a period app can help you to figure that out, by the way) is definitely a scientifically-proven way to go.
2. Your Voice “Goes Up”
While I haven't exactly tested this one out (meaning, I haven't really noticed), I think I will next month (meaning, I will ask some of my male friends) because if ovulating really makes my voice higher, I'm super intrigued. The logic is this — since ovulation is when we can best conceive and we need a man to make that happen (the old-fashioned way, anyway), it seems that we will go up in our speaking voice as a way to appear more feminine which, in turn, makes us more appealing to men. Very interesting.
3. Your Sense of Smell Intensifies
Here's something that's kind of a trip. Did you know that when you're ovulating, your sense of smell intensifies too? A study that consisted of women who are both on and off of the pill and smelling things like lemon, peppermint, rose, musk and the male pheromones revealed that "naturally cycling women" were extremely sensitive to the smell of lemons and male pheromones. The belief is that our olfactory sensitivity is connected to our reproductive system. This makes sense when you think about the fact that a lot of pregnant women experience a heightened sense of smell too. By the way, word on the street is men can smell when we're ovulating as well; especially if they have a higher level of testosterone. Which, to me, also makes sense.
4. You Like the Colors Red and Pink More
Do you tend to not think about wearing red lipstick or that cute ass pink sweater until the middle of your period's cycle? While it might seem random, it actually isn't. There is also data to support the fact that a lot of women are prone to want to rock red and pink shades during their ovulation time. One, because both are hues that are sexy and feminine. Two, because we tend to want to draw more attention to ourselves, these are two colors that typically do it. I mean, with red symbolizing things like love, passion, and desire and pink being about love, femininity, and romance, this doesn't seem too off base either.
5. You Up Your Chances of Having Less Health-Related Issues
Something else that happens when we ovulate is we get an extra dose of the hormone estradiol and progesterone. Why is this such a good thing? Well, estradiol assists with the long-term health of our bones, brain, and heart while also promoting muscle gain as progesterone helps to reduce bodily inflammation, balance our immune system, and support our thyroid. In short, this means that something else that's cool during our ovulation time is our health tends to be in peak form as well.
6. You’re Meaner. Kind Of.
One study I read that tickled me comes out of the University of Texas. Apparently, something else that may transpire when we ovulate is we become meaner. "Meaner" in the sense that we're more competitive with women (including professionally) while also being nicer to men. I'm pretty sure you get why this would be the case. If you want to copulate, you want all prospective obstacles moved out of your way. Chile. CHILE.
7. You’re Willing to Take More Sexual Risks
Do you have more sex-related dreams around the middle of your cycle? Does your taste in clothing seem extra provocative/seductive around then too? Does almost every image that you see resemble something sexual in your mind? Do beards and deep voices make you wanna climb the walls more than ever? All of these things are also directly tied to ovulation.
And because we are more…sexually intense during this time of the month, it can be a lot easier to convince ourselves to take sexual risks or perhaps even do things that we never would consider doing otherwise. Y'all be careful out here. #wink
8. Your Processing of Men Is…Varied
And finally, another sign of ovulation is how we see men. For one thing, we're better at determining a man's sexual orientation. The pure physical attractiveness of a guy matters so much more. And something that's a real trip? It would appear that the mere thought of catching up with our dads — whether in person or even just hearing their voice — is one of the last things on our to-do list. Because, well, who wants to think about their father when they're also thinking about getting some?
The body is an amazing and very detailed machine. Nothing about it is happenstance — clearly. So, the next time your ovulation cycle rolls around, take note of if these eight things transpired and then think about how cool it is to be a woman. Even our period's seasons are pretty dope and entertaining. Hey, this article just proved it.
To learn more about all things vaginal health and wellness, check out the xoNecole Women's Health section here.
Featured image by Getty Images
Different puzzle pieces are creating bigger pictures these days. 2024 will mark a milestone on a few different levels, including the release of my third book next October (yay!).
I am also a Professional Certified Coach. My main mission for attaining that particular goal is to use my formal credentials to help people navigate through the sometimes tumultuous waters, both on and offline, when it comes to information about marriage, sex and relationships that is oftentimes misinformation (because "coach" is a word that gets thrown around a lot, oftentimes quite poorly).
I am also still super devoted to helping to bring life into this world as a doula, marriage life coaching will always be my first love (next to writing, of course), a platform that advocates for good Black men is currently in the works and my keystrokes continue to be devoted to HEALTHY over HAPPY in the areas of holistic intimacy, spiritual evolution, purpose manifestation and self-love...because maturity teaches that it's impossible to be happy all of the time when it comes to reaching goals yet healthy is a choice that can be made on a daily basis (amen?).
If you have any PERSONAL QUESTIONS (please do not contact me with any story pitches; that is an *editorial* need), feel free to reach out at missnosipho@gmail.com. A sistah will certainly do what she can. ;)
This Black Woman-Owned Creative Agency Shows Us The Art Of Rebranding
Rebranding is an intricate process and very important to the success of businesses that want to change. However, before a business owner makes this decision, they should determine whether it's a rebrand or an evolution.
That's where people like Lola Adewuya come in. Lola is the founder and CEO of The Brand Doula, a brand development studio with a multidisciplinary approach to branding, social media, marketing, and design.
While an evolution is a natural progression that happens as businesses grow, a rebrand is a total change. Lola tells xoNecole, "A total rebrand is necessary when a business’s current reputation/what it’s known for is at odds with the business’s vision or direction.
"For example, if you’ve fundamentally changed what your product is and does, it’s likely that your brand is out of alignment with the business. Or, if you find your company is developing a reputation that doesn’t serve it, it might be time to pump the brakes and figure out what needs to change.
She continues, "Sometimes you’ll see companies (especially startups) announce a name change that comes with updated messaging, visuals, etc. That usually means their vision has changed or expanded, and their previous branding was too narrow/couldn’t encompass everything they planned to do."
Feature image courtesy
The Brand Doula was born in 2019, and its focus is on putting "the experiences, goals, and needs of women of color founders first," as well as brands with "culture-shifting missions."
According to Lola, culture-shifting is "the act of influencing dominant behavior, beliefs, or experiences in a community or group (ideally, for the better)."
"At The Brand Doula, we work with companies and leaders that set out to challenge the status quo in their industries and communities. They’re here to make an impact that sends ripples across the market," she says.
"We help the problem solvers of the world — the ones who aren't satisfied with 'this is how it's always been' and instead ask 'how could this be better?' Our clients build for impact, reimagining tools, systems, and ways of living to move cultures forward."
The Brand Doula has worked with many brands, including Too Collective, to assist with their collaboration with Selena Gomez's Rare Beauty and Balanced Black Girl for a "refresh," aka rebrand. For businesses looking to rebrand, Lola shares four essential steps.
1. Do an audit of your current brand experience — what’s still relevant and what needs to change? Reflect on why you’re doing the rebrand in the first place and what success would look like after relaunching.
2. Tackle the overall strategy first — before you start redesigning logos and websites, align on a new vision for your brand. How do you want your company to be positioned moving forward? Has your audience changed at all? Will your company have a fresh personality and voice?
3. Bring your audience along the journey — there’s no need to move in secret. Inviting your current audience into the journey can actually help them feel more connected to and invested in your story, enough to stick around as changes are being made.
4. Keep business moving — one of my biggest pet peeves is when companies take down their websites as soon as they have the idea to rebrand, then have a Coming Soon page up for months! You lose a lot of momentum and interest by doing that. If you’re still in business and generating income, continue to operate while you work on your rebrand behind the scenes. You don’t want to cut existing customers off out of the blue, and you also don’t want so much downtime that folks forget your business exists or start looking for other solutions.
While determining whether the rebrand was successful may take a few months, Lola says a clear sign that it is unsuccessful is negative feedback from your target audience. "Customers are typically more vocal about what they don’t like more than what they do like," she says.
But some good signs to look out for are improvements in engagement with your marketing, positive reviews, press and increase in retention, and overall feeling aligned with the new branding.
For more information about Lola and The Brand Doula, visit her website, thebranddoula.com.
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Not too long ago, while in a session with one of my clients, they were talking to me about having strong sex cravings that seemed to have come out of nowhere. After asking some questions for clarity’s sake, I got that the reason why they used the word “craving” is because it’s not like they are hornier than usual all of the time. Nah, it’s more like the urge creeps up at some pretty random and/or unexpected moments. What they wanted to know from me was if I thought that it was normal.
The short answer is “yes.”
Now, while it’s another message for another time that if this type of sex-related craving feels impulsive or out of one’s control, it could be a sign of someone who is leaning into some level of sex addiction; however, that is not what we’re going to unpack today. Today, we’re going to look into what could be going on with you if it seems like, lately, you’ve been having a greater desire for sex, and you can’t quite pinpoint why.
Because, just like, say, a craving for a particular type of food oftentimes reveals something that is going on with you physically or mentally — sex cravings tend to bring certain things to light in those same areas, too.
Let’s dig in…
Hormonal Shifts
Although I don’t have social media accounts, I do tiptoe out there to see what’s going on — and boy, do I roll my eyes whenever I hear folks act like being over 40 is old. SMDH. It’s especially annoying when I hear about it in the context of sex because, believe it or not, there are a lot of late perimenopausal and menopausal women who are “gettin’ theirs” more than some of these 20 and 30-year-olds are (just ask them).
One reason is that the fear of experiencing an unplanned pregnancy, for many, is now in their rearview mirror. Another is because some are taking a form of hormone therapy to treat the changes that their system is going through — and when you’re getting more estrogen, progesterone, and/or testosterone into your body (in order to level things out) — HUNNAY.
For other women, even consuming phytoestrogens (plant-based estrogen) like peaches, garlic, berries, spinach, and cabbage can make them want sex more than when those aren’t a part of their diet. Bottom line here, a shift in your sexual hormones can definitely cause you to desire sex more than you have before (or have in a while).
Ovulation
Back when I was a teen mom director for the local chapter of a national non-profit, something that I used to tell “my daughters” all of the time is when you know that you’re ovulating, that’s when you need to be hypervigilant about using wisdom when it comes to the sex-related decisions that you make. I’m thinking that most of you get why: your body was designed to feel its horniest when you’re able to get pregnant — and that is during your time of ovulation.
That’s why it really is a good idea to keep up with your cycle and, if a baby is not something that is on your priority list right now, you either avoid having sex during that time of the month or make sure to use some form of birth control. Chile, even women with low libidos can find themselves wanting to hang off of a chandelier or two when they are ovulating. It’s nature’s way.
A Healthy Diet
If you happen to be someone with a sluggish sex drive and you know that you spend most of your time in a drive-thru, there is probably a direct correlation there. No joke. There is plenty of research out in cyberspace to support the fact that a wack diet and low sex drive have a lot in common. While processed foods and unhealthy fats can throw your (sex) hormones off, foods that are filled with zinc, vitamins B12 and D, and iron can ramp up your desire for intimacy.
This is why many people who decide to make a lifestyle change as far as their eating habits are concerned are oftentimes surprised by how much sex is on their minds and how much easier it is for them to orgasm because of it. While a part of it can be due to a boost in their sexual confidence, a lot of it has to do with consuming foods that will literally feed their libido (in a healthy way).
More Exercise
Plainly put, exercise makes you hornier. Not only does it boost your testosterone levels, (consistently) working out also lowers your stress levels and gives you a boost in the self-esteem department. On top of that, exercise makes you more flexible, builds up endurance, and increases blood circulation which can turn around and intensify your climaxes as a direct result. In fact, this is oftentimes why people will want to have sex right after a workout session.
While we’re here, let me also share that too much of a good thing can end up being counterproductive. What I mean by that is, that although it is wise to exercise on a regular basis, make sure to not overdo it. Something known as overtraining syndrome can result in fatigue, insomnia, and irritability; no one can really have amazing sex when all of that is going on.
Being a Certain Age
While it used to be said that the sexual peak for men is in their teens and for women, it’s in their 30s (some believe it’s because after 35, it’s more challenging for women to get pregnant and so our biological clock plays a role in it all), some research believes that coming to that conclusion isn’t fair because aging affects people differently. For instance, while on one hand, people in their 40s tend to see a dip in their sex hormones, as we’ve already discussed, hormone therapy (for both men and women) can level some of those issues out, if not increase some people’s sex drives altogether.
Adding to that, it should also go on record that some studies indicate that women between the ages of 27-45 actually have a stronger desire — or craving — for sex than women between the ages of 18-26. So honestly, there goes the myth that being younger (automatically) means that you’re hornier. #Elmoshrug
Certain Medications
If you used to have a higher sex drive and you’re currently on an antidepressant, that could be why your desire for copulation has decreased. Some studies say that as much as 40 percent of people who are on these types of medication end up having a lower libido (by the way, antihistamines and beta-blockers can have this effect, too).
On the other hand, if you’ve been taking a prescribed drug to increase your sex drive (perhaps like Vyleesi or Addyi), then it would make sense that you may have an increased libido level. Other meds that may have a similar effect include birth control pills (since they alter your hormones), medications that help to treat Parkinson’s disease, along with dopamine-related drugs.
Less Stress
If, on the days when you don’t seem to have a care in the world, you also desire sex more than usual, that’s not a coincidence either. Thing is, when you’re all stressed out, that can cause the stress hormone known as cortisol to work overtime and, when that happens, that can end up suppressing your sex hormones which can deplete you of sexual urges. Ironically, there is a flip side to this because when you engage in sexual activity, that actually elevates feel-good (and bonding) hormones like dopamine, oxytocin, and endorphins, which can also de-stress you.
So basically, if you’re craving sex, you probably aren’t very stressed out (right now), and if you want to stop being stressed out, you probably should have some sex (some protected sex, if you don’t want to be stressed later up the road…if you know what I mean).
Having an Amazing Sex Life
To me, this one right here should be a given because when something is both good to and for you, why wouldn’t you want more of it? So yeah, if you have a great sex life with someone, it’s common sense that you’d want to engage in that act with them as much as possible. Hey, not to mention the fact that orgasms activate your brain in a way similar to a drug high does.
So, if while reading this, you’re thinking about sexting your bae to make arrangements to — eh hem — satisfy your craving, I say go for it! To “greatly want” to connect with your partner in order to have some fulfilling and satisfying sex? What in the world could possibly be wrong with that?! Not a damn thing.
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