When I think of femininity, I think of all the things my mother raised me to be as a young girl, a young woman, and now as a whole grown woman. Clean. Elegant and eloquent. Respectful, disciplined, and tactful. Poised, proper, and presentable. As I am writing this, it reminds me of Daphne Bridgerton in the Netflix series Bridgerton. While I am still all of the things I mentioned, I am naturally casual, organized, independent, strong, focused, righteous, adventurous, analytical, and linear. And because of all of these things, I am accomplished. I have to be these things – this is how I succeed in a gender-biased society. But because of all these things, I am masculine. Sometimes, I even curse like a sailor and walk out of the house looking like a hot mess too.
And – nothing about that is feminine. At least not in the traditional sense of the word.
When it comes to tapping into your divine feminine, there are levels to this shit. I never knew I leaned masculine, let alone what masculine or feminine energy truly was until I started my own spiritual journey. But in this moment, I am not here to share that story with you. I am here to tell you becoming more feminine is a level of consciousness, self-care, and inner work that you must be open to doing. It's layers of learning, unlearning, and shedding.
Question – Unlearn what though? Answer – thoughts, patterns, behaviors, and more.
So, sit with me as I break this down for you.
What Does It Mean to Be More Feminine?
We're told being feminine is in a woman's presentation. It is how we appeal to society physically and how we present ourselves. It's about our hair, skin, and the shape of our bodies. It involves our choices in make-up, clothing styles, and color choices. Let's stop right here – this idea of femininity is all surface level and a societal standard told to us by men. I'm starting to sound a little feminist, but I don't mean to be and that's beside the point. Feminine energy is more than just physical. We are also told that femininity is behavioral. It is soft, modest, submissive, gentle, nurturing, and warm. Again, a societal standard that still scratches the surface of what it means to be feminine.
This definition of feminine energy is old, historical, traditional, and biased. Divine Feminine Energy is so much more than what we are told.
It is purely magical.
What Is Divine Feminine Energy?
Divine feminine energy has always existed. It is a concept that stems from spirituality. ABustle article states that consciousness is divided into two sides – masculine and feminine. Both sides are needed to become our highest selves. The Divine Feminine is concerned with a sense of self. It's a powerful energy that is associated with creativity, intuition, community, sensuality, and collaboration.
When you tap into your feminine energy, it helps build stronger relationships with friends, significant others, and colleagues. According to an article frommindbodygreen.com, feminine energy refers to how you move with the flow of life, embrace your creative energy, dance, play, and attune to your internal process. Divine feminine energy is not associated with or tied to gender. Both men and women equally possess feminine energy.
Tapping Into Your Divine Feminine Energy
There are several ways to tap into your feminine energy. It involves a level of self-awareness, consistency, and commitment to daily practices. Here are some ways you can tap into your feminine energy below.
Put Some Orange In Your Life
Orange is the color of our sacral chakra. It is located below the navel and centered in the womb. Our sacral chakra carries our feminine energy. It's where our creativity and sexuality live. You can eat foods like oranges, cantaloupes, tangerines, carrots, and sweet potatoes to help keep the sacral chakra balanced.
Co-Create Your Life
Get creative – we are on this earth to live and experience but also to create. Women have been given the gift and power to create human life through our bodies. But why should it stop here? We can create through artistic expression. This means writing, painting, singing, poetry, music, and dance. I have said this before, but I'll say it again – author your own life. Create the life you want to live with all the elements you desire in it.
Feel The Shit Out of Everything
Honor your feelings – but not just the good ones, feel the bad ones too. Cry, scream, yell, or smile. Do all of it. Your feelings are a thousand percent valid. Part of divine feminine energy is allowing yourself to feel every single emotion. And to reflect and understand why these feelings are brought about. Allow yourself to process your feelings and listen to how you feel. Ask yourself what this person, situation, or event is trying to tell you or teach you. Trust your intuition – let your feelings make your decisions rather than your thoughts. Your body will feel the answer before your mind starts to think of an answer.
Indulge In Pleasure
Do more of whatever brings you joy. This could look like enjoying food, wine, candles, or a bubble bath. This can also look like a walk in the park, hiking, rollerblading, or an impromptu beach day. It's your responsibility to be the love and light in your life. It's only when you have found your happiness that you're able to bring happiness into other people's lives. We often mistake pleasure for an event we enjoy with a person or a group of people. Sometimes it is, and other times it doesn't have to be. It's OK to enjoy moments alone. And If you enjoy sex, there is nothing wrong with self-pleasure. By all means, explore your body and give yourself that orgasm. You need it.
Be Open to Receiving
It is true – what we put out into the universe is what we receive. So, be aware of your thoughts, actions, and how you move through life. Being open to receive also means when you ask for something, you will receive an abundance of it. There is nothing wrong with asking for help, favors, or support when it's needed. Equally, there is nothing wrong with receiving compliments either. Embrace the love and light that comes your way, and then return it tenfold. It'll come back to you in ways you didn't imagine before.
Watch Your Divine Feminine Transform Your Life
When you tap into your feminine energy, it enables life transformation. I am a living example, like many other women who have tapped into their feminine energy. It's a type of energy that is restorative, inspirational, and vibrant. It is gentle, warm, and playful.
Connecting with your divine feminine is a powerful journey that will help you discover your superpower, soul's purpose, and become more aligned with who you are. And once you learn these things and start to live in your purpose – consider yourself unstoppable.
You begin to thrive. Your dreams start to manifest. Your life unfolds the way it was meant to. The process of transformation is scary but necessary to shed the old to create the new in our lives.
We all have feminine energy, but we tend to let our masculine energy dominate. And balancing both energies is not easy. You have to constantly check in with yourself. Sometimes you have to put yourself in check too. Feminine energy requires you to build a relationship with yourself. And if you haven't heard this already, your relationship with yourself is the greatest relationship you will ever have.
So, are you ready to tap in?
I invite you to reawaken your divine feminine. I invite you to step into this journey of self-exploration.
I promise you won't regret it.
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"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
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Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
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This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
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What Is a Praise Kink?
The concept of praise kinks isn't new, but thanks to TikTok, a lot of people are now realizing they might identify as praise kinksters. Currently, the hashtag #praisek1nk is trending with 568.9 million views, with tons of creators posting about their love for compliments and words of affirmation during sex. I, too, love a good compliment during sex. I once had a lover sing my praises about how good I was at a certain bedroom activity. His affirmations gave me WAP, but does that categorize me as having a praise kink?
How To Know if You Have a Praise Kink
Just because you love receiving praise doesn’t mean you have a praise kink. Someone with a praise kink experiences an intense level of sexual excitement from being praised or verbally affirmed by their partner during sex. You might have a praise kink if hearing your partner tell you how pretty you are makes you cum or if the thing that makes sex go from good to great is hearing your partner's thoughts about how good you are at giving head. And if, during solo play, the thing that gets you all hot and bothered is recalling the times your partner called you a good girl, it’s probably a praise kink.
Generally, a kink is a sexual activity that is needed for someone to enjoy sex. When it comes specifically to praise kinks, if you need reassurance from your partner that you're sexy, or good in bed in order to orgasm, you have a praise kink.
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Examples of Praise Kink Phrases To Try With Your Partner
If you’re new to the term and looking to explore, you probably have questions about what phrases to use. It may take a lot of communication and some trial and error to figure out what phrases work best for you and your partner. Ultimately, the best phrases to use vary from person to person and are based on what sex acts you and your partner enjoy, or what parts of their body they like complimented.
To get you started, here are some generic praise kink examples to try out with your partner:
Praise Kink Examples:
- You're such a good girl/boy.
- You're so good at [insert skill].
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- Your [insert body part] is irresistible.
- You taste so good. I can't get enough of you.
- You just have the perfect [body part].
- Just like that… you’re doing so good.
- Who taught you how to be so good at [something?]
While many examples of praise kink involve specific verbal affirmations, praise can also come in the form of brief words or phrases like “yes,” “keep going,” or simply a moan. No matter what type you prefer, praise kink is all about finding what feels good and exciting, and turns you and your partner on the most.
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Originally published on November 4, 2022