The One Rule Meghan Markle Followed To Secure The Crown & Her Prince Charming
The past 72 hours have been a whirlwind of #RoyalWedding coverage, and for good reason. Saturday's ceremony was seriously one of the most gorgeous spectacles I've had the pleasure of witnessing. Many have been left wondering, how did Meghan Markle, an older, divorced, half-black, American, actress, with no royal pedigree, gain the affections of one of the richest and most eligible bachelors in the world?
Well first, despite all of those descriptors that would seemingly deem her ineligible for such a catch, you can clearly see in Harry's eyes that it was Meghan who was the prize. He made this clear, in fact, in an interview after their engagement, when he said that he knew he "had to up his game" when he first laid eyes on her.
To give some backstory, they were set up by a friend on a blind date, so Meghan must have been exhibiting all the appropriate princess-like behavior even prior to their meeting. After all, even the best wing-woman on Earth wouldn't risk an important contact like Prince Harry by setting him up with a woman who was trashy, inappropriate, or uncouth. The fact that Meghan traveled in the right social circles and spent a lot of time doing charity work both here and abroad furthered her cause, she already acted like a royal before they met.
So what was Meghan's secret to having Harry so smitten from the start?
In my opinion, it's all about how she has harnessed the power and magic of feminine energy. Think about her body language during the ceremony: it was like she was beaming positive energy out of every pore. She was all smiling eyes, soft giggles, affectionate hand-holding, bashfulness (mixed with a healthy dose of confidence) and warm adoration for her man. And the whole world was spellbound.
Femininity is a helluva drug.
This magical energy coursed through their entire courtship, and Meghan took the more feminine route at every turn. She shut down her lifestyle blog and deleted her social media accounts once their relationship was leaked to the media, putting a premium on their privacy rather than her personal brand. She gave up her acting career in order to focus on royal duties, after realizing she could do more for her personal causes as a princess than an actress. She stayed silent as vile things were said about her in the press and family members trashed her on every available platform. These sacrifices gave Prince Harry the space to be her protector, standing up for her via an unprecedented official statement from Kensington Palace both confirming their relationship and calling for restraint in media coverage of her.
Despite what she gave up, in return she gained an alpha male partner who adores her, protects her and provides for her (that and a role in the royal monarchy). Had she held onto "independent woman syndrome" or listened to "friends" who expected her to maintain her career, she would now be yet another in the long list of Harry's ex-girlfriends.
Each of us can manifest our inner feminine in that same way. The key is vibrating on that level energetically.
You can have curves to die for, hair laid, nails done, eyelashes poppin' and designer heels to match every bag in your closet but if your energy is competitive, aggressive and alpha, none of the other qualities matter when it comes to attracting a high-quality man. So many successful women have everything going for them, but because we're so used to doing everything ourselves, we don't allow ourselves to let our guard down and be soft and vulnerable when a man is around. We don't ask for help, we make all the decisions, and we talk more than we listen. It also doesn't help when people are constantly asking what you bring to the table, because you start to think your worth is connected to your work, your grind and your hustle, which is a totally masculine mindset.
Your worth is not measured by what you do, but who you are, a woman worthy of the dreamiest of love stories.
Want to access your feminine power?
- Start with some self-care. Get your nails done, take a bath, or book a regular massage. It's much easier to be positive and playful when you're feeling relaxed and beautiful. Your smile and your happiness is your secret weapon.
- Refine your speech by lightening your voice and speaking more softly. Whether you're on a date or ordering a pizza, you will receive more when you turn your feminine charm on high. Cutting down on cursing is also a good idea.
- Let men do things for you, even if you can do it yourself. Everything from opening a jar of tomato sauce to pumping gas in your car. Treat door handles as if you've never contemplated such a contraption in your life. When you act as if you don't need any help, you won't get any.
Going forward, let's manifest a little more Meghan and tap into our feminine power. Let's leave aggression at the office. Let's heal those hurts that cause us to lash out. Being gentle, vulnerable, and soft are our strengths. They will allow you to attract the alpha male that's going to want to protect you, rather than have you forcing a relationship with a dusty you have to take care of. Even if you are married or partnered, matching your man's masculine energy will throw your entire relationship out of balance and leave you wondering where it all went wrong.
Meghan is no different from any of us. We can all reclaim our fairy tale.
Women, and black women especially, absolutely epitomize the divine feminine. We were born with the knowing, we just have to remember how to harness it again. Let the royal wedding be yet another reminder that we ARE wanted, adored, and coveted by the best of the best.
And when we walk in that truth as a healed, happy, confident, feminine women, we can have anything and everything we've ever wanted.
Featured image by Giphy
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- Prince Harry's bride-to-be - the lowdown on Meghan Markle - CNN ›
Lauren Craig @inawordfab is a former attorney who escaped the corporate grind to pursue her own personal brand of happiness. She is now a full-time writer, TV/radio personality, marketing professional, serial entrepreneur, yogi, Glambassador, and THE TABLE. Join the movement by visiting iamthetable.com.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Why We'll Probably Never Hear Lupita Nyong'o Share Her Relationship With The World
Lupita Nyong'o is sharing a transparent look into her life after a recent breakup.
In a cover story for NET-A-PORTER, the A Quiet Place: Day One star shed light on the significant heartbreak she experienced following the end of her relationship with ex-boyfriend and TV host, Selema Masekela.
As a public figure, Nyong'o, 39, sought to divulge the news of the breakup in hopes of presenting a more authentic perspective on the pain that follows a separation.
"I was living in a lot of pain and heartbreak," she told the publication. "I looked at the environment of my social media and thought I don’t want to be a part of this illusion that everything is always coming up roses. Surely there is a lesson for me to learn in this, and I just want to be real about it."
The Black Panther star went on to explain that her choice to be transparent with her fans about her breakup came from the certainty she felt after ending the relationship. “In my mind, when I shared my relationship status with the world, it was because I felt sure about it,” she said.
While she didn’t know how the news would land with her fans, she found relief in knowing she wasn’t alone in her experience.
“I knew how it could be interpreted; I knew it would have a life of its own,” she reflects. “But then I started to see the comments and people were being so loving and supportive. The ones that moved me the most were other people sharing their pain and their heartbreak.”
Nyong'o and Masekela went Instagram official in December 2022, publicly announcing their relationship in a couple's video. In October 2023, Nyong'o took to her personal Instagram account to share the news of her breakup in her caption, writing, "At this moment, it is necessary for me to share a personal truth and publicly dissociate myself from someone I can no longer trust.”
She continued the vulnerable note, "I find myself in a season of heartbreak because of a love suddenly and devastatingly extinguished by deception. I am tempted to run into the shadows and hide, only to return to the light when I have regained my strength enough for me to say, 'Whatever, my life is better this way.' But I am reminded that the magnitude of the pain I am feeling is equal to the measure of my capacity for love."
These days, Nyong'o tells NET-A-PORTER that she is prioritizing profound self-discovery that extends beyond her career. She notes having a deliberate and unhurried approach to understanding herself.
She also alludes to keeping her relationships private moving forward after noting it was "very, very sage" of her not to talk about her private life professionally in the days before her last relationship. "I'm going back to those days by the way," Nyong'o shares of her reinstated boundaries around her personal life.
Earlier this month, Nyong'o made headlines alongside her new boyfriend actor Joshua Jackson. Nyong'o and Jackson went through public splits from their respective SOs in October 2023, with the latter splitting from his long-time partner Jodie Turner-Smith following her divorce filing from the Dawson's Creek alum.
The pair have been spotted together as early as December 2023, but nothing screamed "couple" quite as loudly as their recent getaway to Mexico for Nyong'o's 41st birthday featuring passionate displays of affection.
"Our purpose in life is to love. And so you have to get back in it," she tells the outlet, seemingly alluding to her budding new romance.
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Featured image by Taylor Hill/Getty Images