It's something about nearing your 30s or experiencing a traumatizing event that really makes you question your life. If you're like me, you've probably been asking yourself questions like:
- "Sis, what are you doing with your life?"
- "Girl, are you truly living a life of purpose?"
- "Are you really doing the work that you were put on this earth to do?
The older we get, living a purpose-filled life is more important than ever. Life is short, so it's critical that we are using every second of our life intentionally so that we are making the best of every minute, every year.
As we've begun this new decade, I've spent a lot of time meditating, trying to figure out what my purpose is, and how I want to tackle this new year and chapter of my life. In this moment of self-reflection, a few words repeatedly came to mind in different forms and different ways, and I've taken it as a sign to continue to meditate on those words as I'm living through my purpose this year.
Those words "faith and fight" is my theme that I hope will keep me pushing and will define my 2020. For me, I know that in order to live a fruitful life with endless blessings, I need to have enough faith to believe I can do it, and then enough fight in me to get the work done.
Recently, I connected with a few boss women from a variety of industries and they shared their word/theme of the year, and why it is their theme for 2020. Keep reading to get instantly inspired!
"MULTIPLY"
Courtesy of Liane Membis
Liane Membis
Founder, BAUCE Magazine and Web Developer
"Many people often pick the word 'growth' but I believe it's important to be intentionally clear about what form of growth you want to see in your life. Every year we 'grow'-- not just in the physical sense but mentally, spiritually, and emotionally as well. I spent the entire last decade growing. Last year, I did things for myself and my business that I didn't imagine I could do. I tested out new products and services, I hosted a women's conference and I did a TEDx Talk. I challenged myself to show the universe that I was ready for my season of multiplication. For me, choosing the word 'multiply' is me speaking boldly and standing confidently in faith to say, 'I am ready to leap, God-willing, into this next phase of success that is destined for me.' I am ready to multiply, or as the dictionary defines it, increase greatly.
"For 2020, my goal is to multiply my income, multiply my love for my partner, and multiply the communities of people that I serve and support. In doing so, I will have to be laser-focused, create boundaries, and be relentless in achieving my goals. But I know that my years of growth have prepared me for this upcoming season of multiplication."
“CLARITY”
Courtesy of Jamelia Donaldson
Jamelia Donaldson
CEO/Founder of TreasureTress
"Success in any area of life requires a clear understanding of the end goal/milestones, and the behaviors/habits which will need to be adopted in order to reach that goal. In any area of my life where I felt as though I wasn't reaching my full potential, I realized in 2019 it was because I was not entirely clear about my current position, where I wanted to be, and what it would take to get there. Clarity requires difficult conversations to take place, deep thought, deep work, changes in habit, and intentional behaviors - all of which I know are recipes for creating the business and life I desire."
“FEARLESS”
Courtesy of Brittanie Jones
Brittanie Jones
Founder/Owner of Fineapple Vegan
"Within this past year, I've learned a lot about myself. Stepping out of my comfort zone and pushing through my health issues and anxiety has been THE HARDEST thing I've ever had to do, but it was necessary! I want to continue to grow and tear down every wall designed to hinder a young woman that looks like me. I want to change lives and make a difference. I will continue to be ME and completely FEARLESS!"
“FULLY COMMIT TO YOUR COMMITMENTS”
Courtesy of Moriah Marie
Moriah Marie aka "Mo Classified"
Radio Personality on k104fm
"The theme that will define my 2020 is 'fully commit to your commitments'. I know you probably read that and thought, 'If it's a commitment then obviously I'm committed.' But in all actuality, not quite. Looking back on 2019 and my life in general, I noticed that I'm such a forward-thinking person that a lot of times I don't sit still long enough to fully commit to things I have considered commitments, let alone sit still long enough to bask in the accomplishments received from things I once prayed for. I'm always worried about bringing the next big idea to life, or how to accomplish something new which in return results in me not dedicating my whole being to other ideas, relationships, and moments overall.
"So to fix that -- in 2020, I'm training my mind to fully dedicate myself to the present moment. Life goes by one moment at a time and if I'm giving my best to the present moment, then it will only create a lot of great moments. If I'm fully committed to the present moment, it will be impossible for me to be distracted by this 'perfect' future that I'm trying to create.
"As far as relationships, I plan to fully commit to being selfless and supportive and ensuring people feel the love that they know I have for them. As far as opportunities, I want to fully commit to giving 100% and not ever being okay with giving any less than that. As far as life goes, I plan to fully commit by leading with integrity in everything I do which will ensure I make good decisions, communicate properly, executing at the highest level, and adopting good habits that will only leave room for prosperity. I want to look back on 2020 and know I gave it my all. I want to look back on 2020 and be able to say I wholeheartedly committed to all of my commitments and be highly pleased with the fruits of my labor."
“CLARITY”
Courtesy of Sylvia Obell
Sylvia Obell
Host of #HellaOpinions at BuzzFeed
"It's hard to look at this year numerically without 20/20 vision coming to mind. It's been my prayer that this year brings clarity to my vision as I watch the seeds planted in the last decade grow. 2020 is the start of a new personal decade for me as well, I turn 30 in February. I'm ready for the experiences and lessons from my twenties to inform better decision-making and serve my best self in my thirties. The more in tune I am with my inner voice and God, the clearer my purpose looks as I move forward in all facets of my life. Shooting shots with the precision of a sniper all decade long. Let the twenties roar on."
Queen, what is your theme or word for the year? Let us know by dropping a comment below or tweeting us and let us know! We're rooting for you!
Featured image courtesy of Jamelia Donaldson
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These days, it's for a completely different purpose, though. Now that I am in the hopefully latter stages of perimenopause (I’m not sure because my mother had a full hysterectomy at 29, her mother died at 53 and I don’t deal with my paternal grandmother because…chile… ) — although I have always had relatively easy cycles and I could definitely set my watch to them, about two years ago, my periods started to show up whenever they felt like it and it was damn near a crime scene once they did.
It was driving me crazy, and so, my nurse practitioner recommended that I take progestin-only pills to shorten, if not completely stop, my cycle: “After a year or so, we can wean off and see if you are entering into menopause on your own.” (Whew, perimenopause, chile.)
Although the first five months of being on this particular pill made me wonder if it was worth it to take this approach, I actually re-upped for another 12-month cycle because the extra progestin (a synthetic form of progesterone) has benefitted me in other areas as well because I am sleeping more soundly and my weight is more stabilized (by the way, when these things are “off,” they are signs of low progesterone levels). However, I did ask my nurse practitioner if, once I do decide to wean off of the pill, would there be any issues.
Her response is what inspired me to write this article because, until she said “post-birth control syndrome” to me, I had no idea there was such a thing. Anyway, if you give me a sec, I’ll explain to you what it is and why you should care if hormone-related birth control is currently a part of your life.
Yes, Post-Birth Control Syndrome Is a Very Real Thing
GiphyOkay, so it’s important to always remember that the way that birth control works is it “manipulates” your hormones so that you can significantly reduce your chances of conceiving. This means that taking them could result in some side effects including nausea; weight gain; headaches; irregular periods and/or spotting; increased stress; depression; blurry vision; breast tenderness, and/or a lowered libido.
That said, even though birth control pills are basically 99 percent effective (when taken correctly and consistently), if the side effects that you are experiencing are making you close to miserable, you should absolutely share that with your healthcare provider because…what’s the sense in preventing pregnancy when you don’t even feel up to having sex because you don’t feel good or your sex drive is shot? More times than not, your provider can find you another pill brand or option that will help you to feel more like yourself.
With that out of the way, think about it — if going on the pill can produce side effects, why would going off of it…not? And this is where post-birth control syndrome comes in.
For the most part, it’s what can happen to your body once you decide to come off of birth control. Typically, the symptoms will last anywhere between 4-6 months and, although the symptoms seem to present themselves most intensely as it relates to going off of the pill, any hormone-related birth control (like IUDs, injections, patches, the ring or implants) could produce similar outcomes.
Outcomes like what?
- Irregular cycles
- Breakouts
- Excessive gas and/or bloating
- Weight gain
- Anxiety and/or depression
- Fertility issues
- Migraines and/or headaches
- Shifts in your libido
- Sleeplessness/restlessness
- Hair loss
Whoa, right? And if a part of you is wondering, “Okay, if this is indeed the case, why have I not heard of this syndrome before?” It’s because it’s not a term that conventional method uses nearly as much as alternative medicine does. Still, it makes all of the sense in the world that if your body has to adjust to an uptick in hormonal intake, it would also need to adjust to removing those extra doses of hormones from your system as well. COMMON. DAMN. SENSE.
Anyway, if you were thinking about taking a break from birth control and taking all of this in has you feeling a bit…let’s go with the word “trepidatious” about doing so, I totally get it. There are some things that you can do to make experiencing post-birth control syndrome either a non-issue or a far more bearable one, though.
7 Home Remedies That Can Make Coping with Post-Birth Control Syndrome Easier
Giphy1. Take a multivitamin.Something that’s fascinating about what going off of birth control can do is it sometimes has the ability to lower your nutrition levels as it relates to certain vitamins and minerals; this is especially the case when it comes to vitamins B, C, E and minerals like magnesium, selenium and zinc. So, if you don’t currently take a multivitamin, now would be the time to start (along with consuming foods that are particularly high in those nutrients as well).
2. Up your vitamin D intake. Speaking of nutrient levels, a vitamin level that commonly drops after going off of birth control isvitamin D. This is hella critical to keep in mind as a Black woman since many of us tend to be naturally deficient in the vitamin as-is and vitamin D is important when it comes to fighting off diseases, regulating weight and keeping your moods stabilized (for starters). So, make sure that your multivitamin has vitamin D in it. Also make sure to consume vitamin D-enriched foods like fatty fish, eggs, mushrooms, yogurt and fortified orange juice.
3. Drink herbal teas. Since going off of birth control will cause your hormones to be all over the place for a season, consider drinking some herbal teas that will help to stabilize them. Black cohosh contains phytoestrogen properties, Chasteberry can help to level out your prolactin levels and green tea can help your hormones out by helping to balance out your insulin (which can sometimes directly affect them).
4. Keep some ibuprofen nearby. The headaches and migraines? Until those subside, you and ibuprofen are probably going to become really good friends; although I will add that ginger tea and inhaling essential oils like chamomile and lavender can help to ease migraine-related symptoms too.
5. Do some meditating. Waiting for your hormones to get back on track can be stressful as all get out. That said, something that can get your cortisol (stress hormone) levels to chill out is to meditate. If meditation is new for you, check out “7 Meditation Hacks (For People Who Can't Seem To Do It).”
6. Get massages. As if you needed an excuse to get a massage, right (check out “12 Different Massage Types. How To Know Which Is Right For You.”)? However, there is some evidence to back the fact that regular massages (somewhere around once a month) can help to lower your stress, boost your dopamine, increase blood flow and drain your lymphatic system so that you will have more energy.
7. Sleep/rest more. There is plenty of scientific research out here which says that sleep deprivation can throw your hormones out of whack — and since your hormones are already trying to stabilize themselves, you definitely need to get 6-8 hours of sleep and not feel the least bit guilty about taking naps sometimes too.
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Post-birth control syndrome may not be the most pleasant thing about getting off of birth control yet it is manageable. So, now that you know all about it, you can feel more confident about taking a birth control break (or getting off altogether) — without the surprises that can come with doing it. Give thanks.
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