

15 Affirmations To Inspire A Happier, More Fulfilled Life
Cue "Good As Hell" by Lizzo. "I do my hair toss, / Check my nails, / Baby, how you feeling?"
Me: A little discouraged.
I know, as the first month of the year comes to an end, you — and most people have given up on annual commitments to yourselves. This would be a surprise if Strava, a social network for athletes, hadn't released research that showed many give up on their New Year's resolutions before the third week of the month has even kicked in.
Meaning, before February has even begun, you and others alike have given up on the "new year, new me" tradition and have settled with remaining who you were last year.
Which is fine.
But only if you're where you want to be.
Otherwise, I'm sure you feel like you have let yourself down before the year has even truly begun.
With heads filled with so much noise, so many tasks, errands, deadlines, emails, and appointments that are made and forgotten, life this 2019 can feel a little hectic; and adding resolutions onto it can feel downright overwhelming. Nevertheless, it is when the going gets tough, the tough finally gets going.
And you, my friend, are tough. You just need a little push is all. Some words of encouragement, if you will.
And that's where I come in.
Here are 15 positive affirmations to ensure that you are keeping your new year commitment to be a brighter, happier, more fulfilled version of yourself. With these affirmations, you can start to reclaim the time taken and start putting it towards becoming the "new you" you've always dreamed of.
1.I Am Enough.
Say it with me: I am enough. I am enough. I am enough.
Say it ten times. Say it a million.
Say it until the words wash away the doubt that taints your tongue. Because the truth is, out of the seven billion people of this world, nobody is better or more gifted than you.
You are capable of remarkable things and you are enough to brighten anyone's day. You are destined to leave a mark on this world.
So, let it be the biggest mark you can possibly create. Go ahead, look in that mirror and say "I am enough." Shout it to the high heavens if you must, because you, darling, are just that: you are enough.
2.I Am Worthy of Love, Happiness, and Fulfillment
Like I said before, shout it to the high heavens, if you must. You were born worthy of love, happiness, and fulfillment, sadly, somewhere along the way, life made you think you weren't. But I'm here to let you know that you are. How do I know? Well, because you're you.
3.I Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff
Some people take life's small slights and setbacks with a shrug, while others freak out, blow up, or fly off the proverbial handle in a loud huff or with silent seething. If you're the latter, it's time to stop sweating the small stuff and let it roll off your back. You already have enough to carry. Instead of growing upset when there is a setback, consider every irritating incident as a chance to work out the reasoning area of your brain. Soon, you'll realize that what constitutes a stressor is subjective and that little setbacks will ruin your day if you let them.
Remember, you've only had a bad moment. Not a bad day. And if you've had a bad day, that doesn't mean you've had a bad life. Go ahead, sweat, it's only natural. But let the small stuff worry about itself. You have better things to do.
4.The Tools I Need to Succeed Are in My Possession
No one is going to appear with the tools you need to succeed in the life that you want. That is up to you. Whether you have to find the tools, buy the tools, or make them yourself, they are accessible, they are limitless, and they are there for the taking. If you want them in your possession, all you have to do is reach out.
5.My Strength Is Greater Than Any Struggle
Say it with me: "My strength is greater than my struggle. I'm fearless. I'm getting stronger every day. I can do this. I'm deserving of my dream. I was not made to give up. Broken bridges cannot stop me."
So, it said, and so it shall be.
6.Happiness is my Birthright. I Embrace Happiness as My Setpoint State of Being
You were born with a natural tendency to bounce back to a happy and joyous state in no time at all. However, as you started 'growing up', perhaps you began losing touch with your natural state of happiness; instead you faked a hybrid portrayal of happiness with the hope of rediscovering that natural happiness eventually.
It's possible that you kept finding ways and means to be happy through material gain, pleasurable stimuli, through social means and relationships. However, not always do external inputs created a lasting state of joy and happiness. When you searched for happiness in the world outside, you forgot that the world that you saw outside of you, was actually mirroring you. When you were in a happier state, you could manifest a happier world around you.
Embrace happiness as your setpoint state of being and accept nothing else, you'll see how quickly your world will shift.
7.I Complete Me. I Am Whole.
Don't worry. You'll find the person that completes you someday.
We hear it so often lately that it's ridiculous.
Which implies that I'm not already whole and need someone else to complete me. That's an issue because it creates the idea that people aren't whole on their own, and it makes people feel broken when they can't find someone they want to be with. There's no problem with people wanting to find the person they want to be with, but when it becomes a quest to be "complete," it's an issue. No one deserves to think they aren't complete on their own. You are. You don't need to search for the piece you think you're missing in the world. You already have it within yourself.
8.I Embrace Change and Acknowledge It as A Gift
Because change is inevitable, it's about time we stop fighting against it. "The only thing constant is change." We know this and we understand that our environment can't stay the same forever. All around us, there is change happening on a daily basis. We are forever growing, expanding, aging, and changing. So, what is it about the world that can seem so overbearing and scary when change happens? Why is it that many of us are instantly repelled by the thought of change?
If we could only learn to let change work for us and benefit us, we could be happier with our lives and the process of growth. Embracing change is key to your success and happiness. So instead of fighting change, acknowledge it as a gift.
9.I Am the Author of My Story. How It Ends Is Up to Me.
Take more agency over your life. Stop letting things happen to you and start taking control of the things that do. How your live ends is up to you. So, decide to make it everything you've want it to be. You're the author of your own story, it is never too late to change the ending.
10. I Release My Attachment to Everything that No Longer Serves Me. I Refuse to Let Anything or Anyone Hold Me Back.
Imagine life without holding onto negative attachments. Imagine a state of peaceful thoughts, which come and go like the ocean tides — without struggle, pain, or resistance. Letting go of attachments can be a difficult thing. You are so used to carrying them around that you're worried what you might feel like once you've let everything go.
Regardless, the truth is: these negative attachments that you're holding onto no longer serve you. And you holding onto them is like trying to swim with an anchor attached to your wrist. Let it go. It might be hard to, but still, let it go. You'll be surprised at what you can find on the surface when you do.
11. I Am Not the Mistakes I’ve Made, and the Mistakes I’ve Made Will Not Be the End of Me
Mistakes are inevitable; and despite knowing this, many spend their time dwelling on them.
Nevertheless, I am going to let you in on a secret, one that many fail to notice: mistakes are proof that you tried. They are lessons that you can learn from. They are important for success. They are in the past and immutable. Holding onto past mistakes can hold you back in life, hurt your present, and ruin your future. Let go of the mistakes you've made so that you can be free. No matter how hard you try, you don't have the power to change it.
No one can change the past, the only thing you can do is accept it, learn from it, and move on.
12. My Future Is My Own
Your future is simply that, your own. So, make it a damn good one filled with everything you want, need, and dream of.
13. I Am Evolving
And no, you cannot switch the word "evolving" to say I am changing. The word "change" implies that there is something wrong with the person you are right now, which simply is not true. In addition, using the word "change" makes you become passive in your active mission of bettering your life and shifting negative thoughts. Change is inevitable. It will always happen to the best—and worst of us, regardless if we are actively participating in our lives.
But, evolving only happens to those who work for it. Evolving only happens to those who choose to develop gradually, evolving only happens to those who choose to make progress, move forward, and make waves. You are evolving, because simply changing is out of the question.
14. I Love Myself Unconditionally
Even in your best forms and even on your worst days: love yourself. Unconditionally. Without limitations, without restrictions. Be kind to yourself. Accept yourself. Love yourself, with everything you've got.
15. I Have Positive, Healthy, and Support Relationships with My Loved Ones
Reminding ourselves that we wish to have healthy and supportive relationships in our lives can remind us to treat others with kindness, compassion, and respect. It can also empower us to stand up for ourselves by creating healthy boundaries in our relationships.
Now that you have these positive affirmations, power to transform your life rests in your hands. I know you'll use it well.
Alexa, play Lizzo.
I do my hair toss,Check my nails,
Baby, how you feelin'?
Feeling good as hell.
Featured image by Getty Images.
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Taysha Robinson is a writer and high school English teacher, based in metro-Atlanta. A self described philomath, you can find her reading books and articles of every genre, attending educational conferences, and hiking wherever the terrain will allow.
Smile, Sis! These Five Improvements Can Upgrade Your Oral Hygiene Instantly
This article is in partnership with Sensodyne.
Our teeth are connected to so many things - our nutrition, our confidence, and our overall mood. We often take for granted how important healthy teeth are, until issues like tooth sensitivity or gum recession come to remind us. Like most things related to our bodies, prevention is the best medicine. Here are five things you can do immediately to improve your oral hygiene, prevent tooth sensitivity, and avoid dental issues down the road.
1) Go Easy On the Rough Brushing: Brushing your teeth is and always will be priority number one in the oral hygiene department. No surprises there! However, there is such a thing as applying too much pressure when brushing…and that can lead to problems over time. Use a toothbrush with soft bristles and brush in smooth, circular motions. It may seem counterintuitive, but a gentle approach to brushing is the most effective way to clean those pearly whites without wearing away enamel and exposing sensitive areas of the teeth.
2) Use A Desensitizing Toothpaste: As everyone knows, mouth pain can be highly uncomfortable; but tooth sensitivity is a whole different beast. Hot weather favorites like ice cream and popsicles have the ability to trigger tooth sensitivity, which might make you want to stay away from icy foods altogether. But as always, prevention is the best medicine here. Switching to a toothpaste like Sensodyne’s Sensitivity & Gum toothpaste specifically designed for sensitive teeth will help build a protective layer over sensitive areas of the tooth. Over time, those sharp sensations that occur with extremely cold foods will subside, and you’ll be back to treating yourself to your icy faves like this one!
3) Floss, Rinse, Brush. (And In That Order!): Have you ever heard the saying, “It’s not what you do, but how you do it”? Well, the same thing applies to taking care of your teeth. Even if you are flossing and brushing religiously, you could be missing out on some of the benefits simply because you aren’t doing so in the right order. Flossing is best to do before brushing because it removes food particles and plaque from places your toothbrush can’t reach. After a proper flossing sesh, it is important to rinse out your mouth with water after. Finally, you can whip out your toothbrush and get to brushing. Though many of us commonly rinse with water after brushing to remove excess toothpaste, it may not be the best thing for our teeth. That’s because fluoride, the active ingredient in toothpaste that protects your enamel, works best when it gets to sit on the teeth and continue working its magic. Rinsing with water after brushing doesn’t let the toothpaste go to work like it really can. Changing up your order may take some getting used to, but over time, you’ll see the difference.
4) Stay Hydrated: Upping your water supply is a no-fail way to level up your health overall, and your teeth are no exception to this rule. Drinking water not only helps maintain a healthy pH balance in your mouth, but it also washes away residue and acids that can cause enamel erosion. It also helps you steer clear of dry mouth, which is a gateway to bad breath. And who needs that?
5) Show Your Gums Some Love: When it comes to improving your smile, you may be laser-focused on getting your teeth whiter, straighter, and overall healthier. Rightfully so, as these are all attributes of a megawatt smile; but you certainly don’t want to leave gum health out of the equation. If you neglect your gums, you’ll start to notice the effects of plaque buildup, which can irritate the gums and cause gingivitis, the earliest stage of gum disease. Seeing blood while brushing and flossing is a tell-tale sign that your gums are suffering. You may also experience gum recession — a condition where the gum tissue surrounding your teeth pulls back, exposing more of your tooth. Brushing at least twice a day with a gum-protecting toothpaste like Sensodyne Sensitivity and Gum, coupled with regular dentist visits, will keep your gums shining as bright as those pearly whites.
Masturdating: A TikTok Dating Trend That We Should Totally Get Behind
Imma tell y’all what — it seems like not one week goes by when I don’t see some sort of so-called term that has me like, “What in the world?” For instance, when I first stumbled upon “self-partnering,” honestly, I laughed. Then shared it with some other single people as well as married folks I know. And I kid you not, every individual was like, “What the heck does that mean?” When I told them that it was yet, one more way to seemingly define single living, basically everyone’s follow-up was, “Oh, brother.”
Why can’t (more) singles just be single and be okay with that? Good Lord. Why does there need to be some sort of relational play-on-words to make it sound like we’re with someone — even if we’re not?
Now masturdating? Even though it’s not even close to being a “real” word, it’s something that also brought a laugh outta me — although it was then followed by a genuine smile. The laugh because I almost immediately caught the play-on-words. The smile was due to the intention behind it all.
If you’re not familiar with what masturdating is and you’re curious about why you should even care, take a few moments to at least skim through what it’s about and why I think participating, as a single person, is a pretty cool (and effective) concept.
@knotlukas Masturdate: a date w oneself
What’s Masturdating All About?
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Masturdating. Okay, so let the word marinate for just a moment. What does it sound like? Yeah…exactly. And since a huge part of masturbation centers around self-pleasure, it’s cool to explore how “self-dating” could produce similar (as far as pleasure is concerned in a broader sense) results. Because masturdating is all about spending quality time with yourself, pampering yourself, treating yourself— and yes, taking yourself out on dates.
Any of you who may think that masturdating is a consolation prize — and a pitiful one at that — for not being able to go out with another human being or get that dream $200 first date that social media was all in a tizzy about last year (bookmark that) — personally, I think that you’re the demographic who needs to try out masturdating first and the most. Why? Off top, I’ll share my three good reasons.
3 Reasons To Strongly Consider Masturdating
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1. It’s an intimate way to get to know yourself better. I’ve been working with couples for a pretty long time at this point and if there’s a pattern that I see arise, OFTEN, it’s that two people are oftentimes so busy trying to “find their person” that they didn’t even know who they were. As a direct result, they found themselves in a relationship with someone who only complemented the “kiddie pool version” of who they were.
That’s why it can be so beneficial to spend time getting to know yourself on the “deep end” of things: what makes you tick, what your passions are, what you want most out of life, what are your interests beyond obvious things — and masturdating can help you to discover all of this. Whether it’s traveling alone or taking out a weekend to drink some wine and journal, the more you get to know yourself, the clearer you’ll be about who complements you on a romantic and friendship level.
2. It will definitely help to boost your confidence levels. I guess since I’m an ambivert, I don’t really get why people freak out at the mere thought of going to a restaurant or movie alone. Personally, I think it requires a helluva lot more energy and gumption to wait around and plan stuff with other people (#Elmoshrug). However, whether you’re an introvert, extrovert, or ambivert, there’s no way around the fact that the more comfortable you get with doing things alone, the more your confidence levels will increase — no, soar — because of it.
One article that I read on the topic said that doing things alone can make you more creative, improve your mental health, and help you to be totally okay with being alone (so that you’re not “needy” for other people’s attention). A psychotherapist from a New York Times article on the benefits of spending time alone said, “Getting better at identifying moments when we need solitude to recharge and reflect can help us better handle negative emotions and experiences, like stress and burnout.” And when you’re able to stare negativity in its face without flinching, how could that not make you bolder, more self-secure, and hopeful about your life?
3. It will teach you to value your time more effectively. In every facet of your world, you’re gonna operate from a healthier place if you’re operating from a “full cup” rather than an empty one. When it comes to this topic, think about it — if you’re constantly waiting on someone to call you to go out or wishing for a dream date with some guy, all you’re doing is wasting precious time that you could be spending taking a cooking class or hell, hiring a chef to make you dinner at your own home.
Indeed, waiting has two sides to it: when it’s in the form of patience, it is indeed a virtue, yet when it’s wrapped up in the notion that you’re not really living life unless you have an audience…it is totally working against you. Choose wisely.
10 Solo Date Ideas To Help You To “Master” Masturdating
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So, what if you’re someone who has either never considered actually masturdating before or you don’t really know what to do beyond dinner and the movies? Here are a few ideas to consider:
1. Attend a workshop or masterclass that you’re interested in. If there’s something that you’ve always wanted to learn, sign up for a workshop or masterclass. The cool thing about this option is there are probably some in your city, as well as some that you can find online (like here) that are convenient and affordable.
2. Binge-read at a local coffee shop. Aside from their coziness and oftentimes inviting scents, I once read that a lot of us gravitate to coffee shops because we can be around people without having to actually socialize with them. So, if you want to “hang out” while still being able to enjoy a bit of solitude, take a book that you’ve been trying to finish to a local coffee shop, order your favorite latte, and sit in a big-ass comfy chair. Usually, you can sit there for hours, and the staff will be just fine with it (another bonus).
3. Have a spa day in the next town. You can never go wrong with a spa day. And while going with a friend can be fun, sometimes there’s too much talking transpiring to be able to fully chill out and relax. So, go off of the grid, get a change of scenery, and hit up a spa in the next city (or town). There are lots of studies out here supporting that day trips or “daycations” can actually be really good for your long-term health and well-being.
4. See a community play. Some of the best solo dates that I’ve ever been on consisted of taking in some of the local arts in my city. What’s really cool about this particular option is, oftentimes, they are extremely inexpensive, if not totally free of charge (in exchange for making a donation or putting money into a tip jar).
5. Plan a trip. Whenever people say something along the lines of, “If you don’t expect anything, you won’t be disappointed,” I know that they low-key have some (additional) healing to do from past disappointments. There’s simply too much intel out here to support that anticipation (of good stuff) makes us more motivated and optimistic, keeps our dopamine levels up, and makes life more exciting overall.
Since traveling alone is more cost-effective, gives you the freedom to do whatever you want (when you want), and increases the possibility of meeting new people and having new experiences on your journey — why not devote a day this weekend to planning a solo trip? All the way around, it’s good for you.
6. Try your hand at your own “$200 date.” Uh-huh. Roll your eyes if you want to, but it’s real easy to talk left about how a man should be able to just drop $200 like it’s nothing…until you actually try to do it. So yes, while taking yourself out on this type of date could serve as a bit of a reality check, it can also “scratch the itch” of waiting on some dude to do it for you. It’s also way less emotionally draining because, at least when you’re taking your own self out, it’s guaranteed that you’ll enjoy the company…right?
7. DIY some pampering. When you get a chance, check out “5 Reasons You Should Unapologetically Pamper Yourself,” “Want To Love On Yourself? Try These 10 Things At Home.,” “I’ve Got Some Ways For You To Start Pampering Your Soul,” and “When's The Last Time You Actually Pampered Your Vagina?” The bottom line here is pampering is all about, not mere self-maintenance; it’s all about treating yourself to levels of EXTREME SELF-INDULGENCE. So, if nothing else tickles your fancy on this list, at least consider doing that, chile.
8. Feed your creativity. Something that I used to be really good at is art. That said, one of my goddaughters is insanely talented, so she has reminded me to tap back into it. Also, a big part of what got me into the writing world is poetry; I actually used to be a house poet at a local spot. Sometimes, my best quality time moments with myself have been revisiting these creative sides of me — and this is definitely easier to do (and enjoy) alone.
9. Try some stargazing. When’s the last time you took a blanket into your backyard, laid down on it, and just stared at the stars for hours on end? While some say that stargazing can teach you to be mindful, others say that being in that form of nature reduces stress, while others believe that looking up at the universe at night can increase your attention span. All solid reasons to give it a shot, if you ask me.
10. DO. ABSOLUTELY. NOTHING. Let me tell you something that nobody will ever be able to make me feel bad about: doing absolutely nothing. I’ve got data to back me up. Good Housekeeping shares that doing nothing can help you decide how you want to respond or react to certain things. I like howThe Guardian says that taking this approach helps you to regain control of what you give your attention to.
TIME magazine says that it can ultimately make you more productive.BBC offers up that it can help you tap into your ingenuity.Henry Ford Health says that it can make you kinder and a better problem-solver. So, if you want to invest in yourself, do nothing sometimes.
Closing Thoughts from the Lovely Javicia Leslie
While some of y'all may know Javicia Leslie from being the former Batwoman, I discovered her back in the day from the indie series Chef Julian (and yes, "Julian" was right to say that "Mo" looks like Tatyana Ali...the real ones know). Sometimes I'll hop on her IG to see what she's got going on and this story popped up within a few hours of me penning this...so, I took it as hella confirmation.
TREAT YO SELF. WAIT FOR NO ONE.
WAIT FOR NO ONE. TREAT YO SELF.
RINSE AND REPEAT.
_____
Sooo…what kind of masturdating plans do you have for this coming weekend? While going out with others has its perks, hanging out with yourself has a ton of ‘em too. Enjoy!
No…for real. ENJOY!
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