The Biggest Takeaways From xoNecole’s Own The Shift Event
After a month full of historical moments and memorials, of extreme highs and ground-shaking lows, the Own The Shift Wellness Event on Saturday was perfectly timed to shift my mindset and energies for 2021. Centered around topics ranging from money management to wellness to finding your voice, tangible and inspiring takeaways were shared amongst boss women to channel the readiness to step fully into owning the next transition of self and wealth. For me and hundreds of other ladies, it was the mental reset needed to tackle the rest of the year. From the inspiring opening statements from xoNecole founder Necole Kaneto the bevy of gems dropped from each speaker to the infectious laugh of Gia Peppers; Own The Shift was a phenomenal event to start this year.
To "own the shift" is to possess a curiosity within yourself, the courage to not ignore what you discover, and the unshakeable faith to stand firm in what you need to get what you want in life. Or, as host and multimedia journalist Gia Peppers put it, "learning how to own my shift as I walk into this next chapter (of life and career)." Across the range of panelists, we saw common themes about realizations, intentions, and dreams manifesting come into play. It was two hours of impactful, soulful, and dedicated advice to truly empower and motivate like-minded women. My notebook is filled with all the gems I wanted to savor, but here are the biggest takeaways I received from the #OwnTheShift event!
The Fundamentals of Awareness and Affirmation-Setting
Wellness Strategist Toni Jones shared several keys on how to own your shift through affirmations, honesty, and patience. The first step is being aware of your design to operate more healthily. By honing in on that awareness, you can find the discouraging narratives that are limiting the divine orchestration for what's possible in your lives. According to Toni, it's only after those steps that you can truly begin to own your shift.
Toni dropped so many gems in the first 30 minutes, along with making excellent analogies for how to think of yourself - especially when marketing and such. What is your campaign? How do we advertise to ourselves? You have to create affirmations that are true to you, and you alone. You have to give yourself new content to focus on, a new narrative to derive from. It's only by creating those intricate campaigns for ourselves that we can own the shift and step into our greatness.
"How do we create our own marketing campaigns for our greatness, for our potential, for our possibilities?"
Owning Your Genius + Prioritizing Your Needs
It's often said you need to shift your mindset to make and maintain a certain level of wealth, especially if you didn't grow up around money. But financial expert Tonya Rapley took it one step further and emphasized the importance of knowing your genius and prioritizing your financial needs to build and scale wealth. During Saturday's event, Tonya explained why a major part of "owning your shift" is understanding your particular zone of genius is, and understanding what you can and cannot learn. If you don't understand what level you're at, you won't be able to find successful resources to scale your business. As Tonya points out, a great first step is to find a coach who specializes in your niche and has worked with individuals who are in your shoes.
Once you fully understand your strengths and weaknesses personally and professionally, you can then implement tactics to achieve your business goals. At that point, prioritizing your needs against those goals will help to scale and maintain your business and wealth.
"If you have more than three goals (for the year), then you have none. You can't do it all."
The Power of Equanimity
For me, the word "equanimity" has followed me around since roughly 2017, when Dave Chappelle aptly named his comeback comedy special, Equanimity and The Bird Revelation. So, when best-selling author Lalah Delia encouraged hundreds of ladies to lean into more equanimity in 2021, I felt my entire soul fill up.
Equanimity is defined as the "evenness of mind especially under stress". It's truly an ethereal state of mind that disconnects from the chaos of life and centers the mind on peace and harmony. For Lalah Delia, it is the mindset that has helped her own the shift in her own life, especially with the uncertainty of 2020. It is something we all can tap into and maintain for ourselves; an aspect of life that is completely self-owned. The everyday practice of equanimity trains our physical bodies to understand that peace doesn't come from external outcomes like we are trained to believe. It allows us to practice a higher power of alignment and builds the fundamental skill of balancing ourselves.
"No matter how the energy of stress enters into your energy field, you're able to tap into equanimity, which means poise, composure, inner peace, and balance."
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Featured image by Shutterstock
Courtney is a contributing writer, based in Puerto Rico by way of Tennessee. Interested in the intersection of fashion and culture, she has an affinity for fashion, empowerment, and really good tacos. Keep up with her on Instagram (@hautecourtxo).
This article is sponsored by Hulu.
UnPrisonedhas returned for its highly anticipated second season, delving deeper into the complex dynamics of the Alexander family.
The series premiere comes a year after its debut season garnered rave reviews from fans and critics and earned record-breaking ratings for Hulu's Onyx Collective brand. UnPrisoned's success can be attributed to its raw, relatable themes and comedic appeal.
Inspired by creator Tracy McMillan's life, the show follows Paige (Kerry Washington), a therapist and single mother whose life takes an unexpected turn when her father, Edwin (Delroy Lindo) --who was released from prison-- moves in with her and her teenage son, Finn (Faly Rakotohavana).
Throughout UnPrisoned's first season, viewers witnessed how Edwin's incarceration deeply affected Paige's life and relationships. In the series, Paige unpacks her trauma through interactions with her inner child and her online followers. Meanwhile, Edwin is overcoming specific struggles with his own past that led to his life of crime, including a dysfunctional upbringing and his mother's arrest. As the Alexanders attempt to reconcile, new challenges arise.
This new season promises to further explore their unconventional family dynamic. Here are several compelling reasons why season two of UnPrisoned should be on everyone's watchlist.
The Alexander Family Life Is Still In Shambles
UnPrisoned's second season resumes where the series left off, with Paige grappling with the fallout from her troubled therapy practice and Edwin navigating life independently after moving out. Meanwhile, Finn faces his own challenges. The teenager is battling anxiety and seeking information about his father—a topic Paige avoids discussing.
The Alexander Family Are Attending Therapy To Resolve Their Underlying Issues
Amid the chaos in their lives, the Alexander family decides to mend their bond by confronting their past traumas. They seek professional help and attend therapy sessions with a “family radical healing coach,” played by John Stamos, a new cast member. This collective effort aims to unravel the complexities of their shared history and strengthen their relationships.
The process of unraveling each character's internal conflicts and their potential impact on future relationships may clash with Paige's textbook therapy approach. While Paige is used to being in the therapist's seat in both career and family, this forces her into the unfamiliar role of a patient during therapy sessions. This shift would compel her to look in the mirror and try a radically different approach.
The Alexander Family Learned A Big Lesson During A Therapy Session
In therapy, the Alexanders are tasked with addressing their individual traumas to salvage their remaining relationships. One of the family therapist’s eccentric suggestions was an exercise involving a family wrestling match. During this session, Paige faces tough questions about her refusal to share information about Finn's father.
While it's unclear whether this scene is reality or fantasy, the image of the family duking it out in the ring certainly makes for hilarious yet compelling television.
Paige Tries Dating Again Following Failed Relationships
Amid her life's chaos, Paige decides to step back into the dating field. However, her many attempts have left her with mixed results. The dating apps have turned out to be a fail, and an outing with her ex Mal (Marque Richardson), who is also her father's parole officer, doesn’t go quite as expected after he brings an unexpected guest – his new girlfriend.
The situation takes an awkward turn when Mal's new partner learns why the former couple split, partly due to Paige's self-sabotage.
UnPrisoned Is A Perfect Balance Of Comedy And Drama
As a dramedy, UnPrisoned takes a comedic approach to its heavy subjects. The show takes us on a ride with Paige's dating misadventures and navigating a friendship with her ex.
Other lighthearted moments include Edwin's attempts at CPR based on online videos and, of course, the antics of the Alexander family's unconventional new healing coach.
The second season of UnPrisoned is now available on Hulu.
UnPrisoned | Season 2 Trailer | Hulu
Feature image courtesy
I Went To Dakar On A $400 Travel Glitch: 5 Irresistible Reasons To Visit Senegal's Coastal Gem
Just a few years ago, I shared the stories of a few fellow travelistas who came across a $200 travel glitch to South Africa and Dubai. At the time, I remember thinking, I hope to one day get to travel to a foreign destination for a low price myself. I knew a handful of people who were able to snatch tickets at the below market value price, and each one came back with amazing stories to tell. So I followed the advice shared in my interviews, started following Twitter pages like The Flight Deal and Airfare Deal Alert, and prayed that one day, my moment would come.
And my day did come on New Year’s Day in 2023. I woke up to an email in my inbox about a “travel glitch” for a $400 round trip to Dakar, Senegal, from Scott's Cheap Flights (now Going), one of many sites that I subscribed to that sends out daily travel deals for destinations all around the globe. While I had heard of Dakar from friends who went, I admit it wasn’t initially high on my bucket list. I was determined to get to Cape Town, Ghana, or Egypt before venturing out to other countries in the Motherland.
But the thing about travel glitches is that you have little time to think. As I had learned from missing out on previous travel glitches, waiting more than a few hours could cost you a good deal. So after doing a quick Google search to see if Dakar would be a good solo travel destination (in case I couldn’t convince anyone else to come), I booked the trip and shared the news with friends and family to see if anyone else wanted to go.
At first, nobody seemed interested, so I mentally prepared myself to go on what I thought would be my first international solo trip. But a few days later, my best friend surprised me when she said, “I’m down to go with you, boo.” And those coveted words were the beginning of what would be one amazing trip with my ride-or-die bestie.
If Dakar wasn’t on your radar before, I hope that by the end of reading this, you get an idea of the magic of this gem nestled on the West Coast of Africa. From the rich and vibrant culture to fun day trips and beautiful beaches to take a dip, here are five reasons you need to book a flight to Senegal ASAP!
Gorée Island
Kiah McBride
1. The History is Rich
Writer Kiah at Gorée Island
Kiah McBride
Dakar is a place filled with history just as rich and colorful as its French colonial buildings. On a tour through the city of Dakar, we stopped by the Our Lady of Victories Cathedral, where we learned that 96% of Senegalese identify as Muslim, though the city is known for being extremely tolerant towards different religions. We wound our way through Marché Kermel, one of the most popular markets for food, spices, and souvenirs. As we made our way to Gorée Island, one of the largest slave-trading centers on the African coast from the 15th to 19th century, we felt the weight of our ancestors' pain as we walked through the eerily quiet streets of the island.
At each stop of the tour, we got a sense of where Dakar has been and where it’s going as the city continues to grow economically and modernize its infrastructure. For that reason, like any city, expect to see a mix of more humble and luxurious abodes as you ride through different areas.
African Renaissance Monument
Kiah McBride
2. The People are Kind and Offer Great Hospitality
Dakar Market
Kiah McBride
Whenever you travel to a new country, there’s always that question of whether or not you will feel accepted by the people there. I was pleasantly surprised to find that the people of Dakar are not only kind, but they actually pride themselves on their hospitality. In fact, they even have the word “terenga” in their local language, Wolof, to describe the warm welcome that they give visitors. Throughout my time there, I felt safe and even managed to stumble through my beginner French to connect and converse with some of the locals. If safety and hospitality are high on your list of travel needs, you will find yourself at home in Dakar.
Dakar Market
Kiah McBride
3. The Food is Phenomenal
Thieboudienne meal with bissap on Gorée Island
Kiah McBride
The amount of yassa fish (Filet de Lotte) and bissap (a sweet hibiscus drink similar to the Jamaican drink Sorrel) we consumed should be a sin. The food in Dakar was so fresh and flavorful that I found myself looking forward to every meal. Whether you indulge in more traditional cuisine such as thieboudienne—a seasoned fish simmered with vegetables in tomato paste and served over broken rice—or opt for more familiar dishes, Dakar has a restaurant to accommodate your taste buds. A bonus if you go to a place with a view just as beautiful as your plated dish!
Ngor Island
Kiah McBride
Kiah pictured at Ngor Island
Kiah McBride
4. There are Endless Activities and Attractions
Bandia Reserve
Kiah McBride
From the beautiful beaches of Plage de Yoff to the Bandia Reserve, where you can go on your own mini safari tour, there’s no shortage of things to do both in and outside of the city. We were in Dakar for nearly seven days and only managed to squeeze in enough time to tour the main sites and monuments, catch a small boat for an overnight stay on Ngor Island, and make our way to see the giraffes at the Bandia Reserve. That may sound like a full itinerary, but we probably would need at least a month in Senegal to really experience all that it has to offer. Be sure to do your research to best determine how to plan your itinerary, as some attractions like Lac Rose (a pink lake) and Lompoul Desert will require you to be gone for a full day or even overnight.
Kiah at Ngor Island
Kiah McBride
5. The Nightlife is a Vibe
Hitting the late-night streets may not be everyone’s preference, but if you do find yourself curious about the evening festivities of the city, then Dakar certainly will not disappoint. We were surprised to discover that Dakar has a vibrant nightlife and that many of the clubs and late-night eating spots don’t close until the sun comes up. While I normally wouldn’t emphasize the party life as being the reason to travel, there’s just something about listening to Afrobeats in Africa on a beautiful summer night that’s a magical experience. If nightclubs aren’t your thing, consider enjoying live music at a local spot or nearby hotel, such as Hotel Boma, for a more chill vibe.
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Featured image by Kiah McBride