Going on the hunt for a new job can be both exciting and frustrating, and more of the latter if you don't have a solid plan. You might get to the point where you've sent out hundreds of resumes, attended dozens virtual job fairs, and hit "Instant Apply" on LinkedIn more times than you can count, yet still no offers. You also might be growing tired of the rejection emails, the multiple interview rounds that lead nowhere, or the low-quality correspondences about jobs that are way below your experience and pay grade. Figuring out how to find your next gig can be more than draining.
If any of this sounds familiar to you or you feel seen, we've got you covered with a better way to attack your job search and come out the victor:
Elevate your online presence.
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More than 50 percent of recruiters are using social media to find job candidates, according to recent research, so it's time you up the ante on the web. You'll need to get creative, and there are so many cool and free ways to do this. You can set up a free Wix or Weebly website or a simple About.me page with your photo and resume presented in a way that is both visually pleasing, informative, and engaging. Keep it simple but allow it to reflect your personality and who you are outside of what you do. (And, unless you're in a creative industry, don't go too crazy with colors, fonts, and other elements that might be distracting. Keep it clean and let the storytelling about who you are and what you offer shine).
You can also spruce up your Instagram, LinkedIn, or Twitter pages by getting some professional headshots done and updating a bit more often with posts that include insights on solving a problem or highlights on your niche knowledge, experiences, and expertise.
If you're into shooting videos, start a YouTube channel discussing issues you're passionate about (job- or industry-related, of course) and again, keep it simple (unless you're a whiz at video production and editing).
Go old-school.
So you've only been relying on email or private messages? Sis, you might have to actually visit a few offices in person (if safe and possible). Call and inquire about a recent job post, and ask about additional information so that you can strategize a better way to approach applying. Connect with an executive assistant, receptionist, or maybe even someone who might become your future coworker—in person.
Attend in-person fairs instead of virtual ones. While you might not want to shove a resume in someone's face at a conference or panel, a brief face-to-face encounter is a good icebreaker for when you do follow up with an email about a recent job opening.
(And take your resume anyway. You never know if your perfect moment to shoot your shot might come up. Be sure to read the room. This is where good social skills and strategic initiative come in.) If unsure, just get their contact information to cultivate a relationship and work your way toward that perfect moment to pitch yourself in the future.
Get a coach or connect with a head hunter.
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Sometimes it's best to get some help from a professional who can be your sounding board for your frustrations, assist you in creating a better strategy, and connect you with legitimate job leads. This is especially important when you have more than 10 years of experience in the industry because, at that point, you'd be looking for opportunities that reflect your growth, career fulfillment needs, and salary requirements.
The best place to start is LinkedIn because you want to be sure you're getting a person who's about results and has credibility.
Many career coaches and headhunters detail their experience, background, methods, and success stories on LinkedIn, and finding one can lead you to others who might be a good fit.
Also, try contacting your former college's career center or alumni office to get information on people who provide coaching or headhunting services. Check out resources like the National Career Development Organization (NCDO) or the Professional Organization of Resume Writers and Career Coaches to find reputable professionals. (And here's a good time-saving trick: Do a bit of digging into their social pages. Oftentimes you'll find professionals you can reach out to among their follower lists.)
Consider civic, internship, fellowship, or volunteer work.
Don't roll your eyes just yet. When you're unemployed or are changing careers, ain't nobody got time to give away their time for free or for lower pay than expected. But hear us out, sis. If you've already been hitting job search walls for a while, it won't hurt to offer a few hours a week toward volunteering for an organization, entrepreneur, or company initiative in order to spark relationships, showcase your abilities and build trust in your potential to become a paid employee. (And even if it doesn't lead to a job at that company or brand, it's an experience that you can market for another opportunity.)
It could be a breast cancer advocacy walk where you know certain sponsors and their key executives will be involved. It could be a church event, local school program, a blood drive—even a political or advocacy march or demonstration. Position yourself to not only do good but to be in the presence of others who might have job leads.
Internships and fellowships (even if you're past your college days) are also great for getting your foot in the door and gaining experience.
Post-grad internships provide opportunities for professionals who have already earned degrees but do not fit the requirements of traditional internships. Most fellowships provide some sort of stipend, grand, or modest salary and might even include benefits, relocation funds, and health insurance.
Another option is military enlistment or applying for the Peace Corps (which is an independent non-military entity). The age limit for some military branches goes up to 35, and both paths provide a great way to not only expand your horizons (both mentally and physically) but to cultivate and apply your skills to a multitude of industries and roles while serving.
Broaden your standards and think outside the box.
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Don't limit yourself by the degree you earned or the industry you've always worked in. True, some jobs require certain certifications and specialized education, but many jobs rely on transferable skills. For example, you could have a bachelor's degree in marketing but your skills might be ideal for a sports organization, news outlet, or nonprofit, not just for a marketing agency or advertising firm. Or let's say you've been an educator in a traditional school system for five years. Well, that same leadership, class management, and lesson plan composition skills could be used for corporate training, research, or standardized test development.
Love fashion but you're a tech geek? Get your foot in the door via IT or graphic design, and then work your way into a different department. If you've always worked in the for-profit sector, why not explore nonprofits and use your talents there? Only looking at the big Fortune 100 companies? Why not get your feet wet first at a startup or mid-sized brand?
You have to think about the long game in order to win in sustainable career advancement, so sometimes taking the alternative or nontraditional route to gaining employment is a better idea in the long run.
For more job search tips, career advice, and profiles, check out the xoNecole Workin Girl section here.
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A Goddard College graduate, who earned an MFA from Pratt Institute and was awarded an honorary doctorate from Marymount Manhattan College, Mahogany offers unapologetic realness with a side of grace and empowerment. "I started touring locally. I started creating chat books so that those poems will go in the hands of the people who were sitting in the rooms," she shared.
"And then I started facilitating poetry workshops, so I used my chat books as curriculum. And that, in turn, allowed me to further invest in my art and show the community and people who were hiring me that it wasn't just a one-off, that it's not just, you know, a fly by night—that I am invested in this art as much as I am invested in your community, in your children's learning, in our growth."
Mahogany has a special way of moving audiences, and her superpower sparks shifts in perspective, post-performance introspection, and strengthening of community bonds, especially among Black women. (One can undeniably recognize her gift for arousal of the spirit and mind merely from her listening to her insights from the other side of a Google Hangout call. I can only imagine the soul-stirring, top-tier sensory encounter when watching her perform in person.)
In this chat with xoNecole, Mahogany reflects on sustaining a creative career, the aftermath of writing a banned book, and using poetry for both healing, community-building, and activism.
Anthony Artis
xoNecole: What are three key things that have laid the foundation for a sustainable creative career for you?
Mahogany L Browne: What has helped me is that I'm willing to go in being an expert at knowing poetry and knowing the way in which art can change the landscape of our lives, not just as a poet, but also as a poetry facilitator. How you move through classes, those things are mastered, right? So when I go into another space that's maybe tech-heavy, I don't mind learning and being, you know, a student of the wonder of how we can make this magic, work together.
Two, you’ve got to know how to pivot. Sometimes we say, ‘Alright, this is what my life is going to be. I'm going to be a New York Times best-selling author. I'm going to, you know, have an album that's Grammy-nominated. And then, say you get dropped from your record label. That doesn't mean you can't make an album anymore. You can also still create an album that can be submitted to the Grammys. So, what does a pivot look like as an artist who doesn't have an institution behind them? Pivot being a student of the wonder.
Relationships also really help. How do I serve the community? And in turn, that tells me how the community can show up. For me, I have long-standing ties with a community that will outlast my one life. So, what does it mean to create space where these relationships can develop, can be nurtured, can be rooted, can be cultivated? Creating space—it happens through relationships.
xoN: With today’s economic challenges, what does your current creative process look like, and what are you working on?
MB: I’m always thinking five years ahead. I just reviewed the pages for two children’s books and recently released a YA novel. I’m drafting an adult fiction manuscript now.
Anything I create is founded with the root of poetry, but it can exist in captions. It can exist in commercials. It can exist as a musical. So that's where I’m at now.
xoN: You started performing "Black Girl Magic" in 2013, had an acclaimed performance of it via PBS and the work went on to viral success shortly after. Talk more about the inspiration. And what do you think about the continued relevance more than a decade later?
MB: I wrote it as a rally cry for the mothers who had been keeping themselves truly in harm's way by, you know, being a part of the community right after the death of their child or their loved one. They are usually mothers of victims of police brutality—and just seeing how they showed up in these community spaces, they are devout to the cause but obviously still grieving.
"I wanted this poem to be just a space of reclamation, of joy and of you, of your light, of your shine, of your brilliance, in any which way in which you fashion. Every room you enter is the room you deserve to be in. What does it mean to have a poem like that that exists?"
And the first time I did the poem, the Weeping that occurred, right? It was like this blood-letting of sorts. The next time I performed it, I'm moved to tears because I'm seeing how it's affecting other women who have just been waiting to hear, ‘You belong. You deserve. You are good. We see you. Thank you, despite everything that they said to make you regret being born in this beautiful brown, dark-skinned, light-skinned, but Black body.’
Black women are the backbone—period. Point blank. And so, that that poem became a necessity, not just to the fortitude of Black women in the community, but like you know, in service of healing the Black women.
xoN: One of your books was banned at a school in Boston, and it was later reinstated due to parental and activist support. What was that experience like?
MB: Well, I think it happened because they were racist. That's it. Point blank. The reversal of it was empowering, right? I realized, oh, I thought we just had to sit here and be on a banned book list. But no, parents are actually the leaders of this charge.
So to see that, the parents said, ‘Nah, we're not gonna let you take this book out of my baby’s school just because it's a Black kid on the front saying, ‘Woke’ and they're talking about being a global citizen. They're talking about accountability. They're talking about accessibility. They're talking about allyship, and you don't want them to have compassion or empathy or have even an understanding, right? So no, we rebuke that, and we want this book here anyway.’ To see that happen in that way. I was, like, reaffirmed. Absolutely.
xoN: You recently organized the Black Girl Magic Ball at the Lincoln Center in New York. Honorees included author and entrepreneur Rachel Cargle and National Black Theater CEO Sade Lythcott. What impact did it have and what expanded legacy do you hope to leave with your creative works?
MB: I was really interested in not celebrating just the book, but celebrating the community that made the book possible. And so I gave out five awards to women doing that thing, like, what does it mean to be a Black girl in this world?
I just thought it was gonna be an amazing time. Everybody's gonna dress up—we're gonna celebrate each other. And boom, I then realized that it responded to like a gaping hole. There was a missing thing for Black girls of all walks of life, all ages, right?
"It's very intergenerational. That was intentional to come together and celebrate just being us."
You have all these instances where just being you is either the butt of a joke or it's diminished and not worthy of a specific title in these larger institutions. So what does it mean to just to be loved up on and celebrated?
It felt like a self-care project at first. You know, for the first couple of years, folks were coming and they were getting that sisterhood. They were getting that tribe work that they were missing in their everyday lives.
I love the Black Girl Magic Ball because we got us. If I go out with a bang, they'll remember that Mahogany worked her a** off to make sure all the Black girls everywhere knew that she was the light. We are the blueprint.
For more information on Mahogany L. Browne, her work, and her future projects, visit her website or follow her on IG @mobrowne.
Featured image by Anthony Artis
Anyway, all of the talk about vampires — you know, due to the film — did cause me to wonder something that might seem rather random, yet that’s oftentimes how my mind works: Do vampires give each other hickeys? As I Googled for an answer, besides a book that has a title close to that name, I did notice an ABC feature from when the vampire Twilight film series was all the rage several years back. It was inquiring if teens were suddenly biting each other (back then) because of the movie(s).
The sexologist who was interviewed came to the conclusion that since biting is “an extension of the hickey” and hickeys are (typically) considered to be passionate, that’s why teens were interested in doing it. As far as what vampires do with each other? I couldn’t find a definitive answer.
I dunno. With hickeys also being called “love bites” and “suck marks” and with folks oftentimes describing vampire-themed movies as sexy, I would think that they could. Either way, what we know for sure is that those of us in the real world do it — and so, in honor/acknowledgement of that, I figured that now would be a perfect time to share some facts about hickeys. Ready?
1. Humans Are Copying Animals When They Give Hickeys
Aight, so what exactly is the origin story of hickeys? It would seem that it came from the literature of authors who wrote about what animals like lions and wolves do whenever they are showing affection towards one another. Apparently, humans saw this and eventually began to follow suit.
Hey, that doesn’t sound so crazy to me, considering doggy style continues to be a fan favorite among our species, and…have you ever seen two cats have sex before? I have, more than once, and the male cat is typically biting on the female one, in her neck region, during the act. So, when I really stop to think about all of this, it definitely tracks.
2. Hickeys Are Oftentimes a Low-Key Power Play
Ah, perfect. If you click here, you will actually see a picture of two cats having sex, and — like I just said, the male cat is biting the female cat. One reason why is because male cat penises have barbs on them which can make the entry or exit of intercourse literally painful for the female. And so, the male cat holds her in place by biting her, so that she doesn’t run away. And yes, along these same lines, some believe that hickeys can serve as their own power dynamic shift, even among humans — especially based on where a person decides to put one. I guess it would be like “peeing on your territory” in a way — hmph, which is something else that animals tend to do.
anon GIF - Find & Share on GIPHYGiphy3. Hickeys Are Nothing More than a Bruise
Okay, so what actually causes a hickey to happen? Well, when someone sucks and gently bites on your skin, it can break some of the surface blood vessels that are underneath your skin to break. When that happens, it results in a bruise. If someone does this to you for about a half a minute, you should notice a hickey emerge in a matter of minutes and, depending on how “good” of a job they did, a hickey can stick around for as much as a couple of weeks.
4. “Temperature Play” Speeds Up the Healing Process of Hickeys
Again, depending on how “good” of a job someone did at giving you a hickey, it could last between two days and two weeks. If you want yours to fade faster, because, again, hickeys are a bruise, it’s a good idea to bring some temperature play into action. What I mean by that is, start off by putting an ice pack on your hickey for up to 10 minutes, twice a day, for the first two days.
Then, after 48 hours, apply a warm compress for 10 minutes a few times a day. You might also want to apply a bit of peppermint oil to your hickey and gently massage that area as well; that will help to bring more blood flow to the spot, so that your skin can heal faster.
5. If You Take Blood Thinners, Hickeys Will Last Longer
If you’re someone who takes blood thinners, that will keep hickeys aren’t for a longer period of time. That’s because blood thinners are specifically designed to slow down the blood clotting process that’s in your body. So, if you’re big on hickeys and you even take aspirin on a fairly regular basis, you’re gonna have to accept that the “hickey healing hacks” may not actually work for you (at least not as quickly or effectively).
6. Certain “Natural Things” Can Make Them Last Longer Too
Speaking of blood thinners, even if you aren’t on any meds, did you know that certain foods provide blood-thinning effects as well? Some of those include ginger, garlic, aloe, turmeric, and cayenne pepper, and even supplements including vitamin E and melatonin. Just something to keep in mind. (By the way, vitamin C and the bromelain in pineapples can help to heal hickeys as far as supplements and foods go).
7. No, Hickeys Will Not Give You Cancer
It actually wasn’t until I was doing research for this article that I even heard the myth that hickeys can give you cancer. What in the world? Yeah, if you heard that somewhere before, pay that tale no mind, because science absolutely says otherwise. For the most part, hickeys are relatively harmless.
8. They Can Give You an Infection, Though
And why did I just say, “for the most part”? Yeah, you caught that, huh? Well, there is an extreme instance where a woman had a stroke due to a hickey because it happened on top of a major artery — that’s hella rare, though. What is more common is oral herpes transmitted through hickeys.
Not to mention the fact that a hickey is usually a bruise more than a wound; however, if your skin does end up being broken or you’re giving a hickey and blood is somehow transmitted…well, I’m sure you could see how this could be potentially problematic. Bottom line, get — and stay getting — tested. Just to be on the safe side. Hickeys or not.
9. A Dream About Getting a Hickey Is Actually a Warning
Remember how I said earlier that sometimes the person who is giving the hickey is doing so as an act of power? Well, along those same lines, if you happen to dream that someone is giving you a love bite, keep in mind that it probably isn’t about anything sexual; usually, it means that you are either in a toxic or stressful situation and you’re trying to figure out if you should approach it with logic or emotion. The more you know.
10. Sometimes Pain Creates Pleasure
Someone who enjoys being tortured or humiliated during sex, they fall into a category that is known as sexual masochism — and no, that is not what I am referring to here. What I am speaking about is the fact that, because pain and pleasure sensations are housed in the same part of the brain, when mild pain is felt, that could be why it arouses you — and that could be why you may enjoy receiving hickeys (I mean, if you actually do). They both have been proven to create a dopamine and opioid surge, which can intensify your sexual responses and reactions.
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Hickeys do tend to create a very polarizing response: folks either adore them or loathe them. Either way, now you know what they’re all about, so if you’re on the “A” team, share it with those who are also in your club.
It could make them appreciate hickeys — love bites, suck marks — that much more, chile.
Dig in. #wink
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