When it comes to balance, we often think about work, love, and family; but what about what we like to do to let loose? As a single mother, I'm totes guilty of putting "fun" on the back burner. Between pushing upwards of 50 hours a week at work and mommin' it around the clock, I found the things that once piqued my interest quickly fade into nothingness. It wasn't until I began volunteering with my daughters weekly at local initiatives, that I crawled out of the rut that is better known as a stick in the mud.
So, if you're anything like me -- searching high and low for fresh ways to spice up your life, check out 10 cool and low-cost hobbies for the multifaceted woman below.
1.Learn A New Language
You heard it from Drake. "I could teach you how to speak my language, Rosetta Stone." In other words, what better way to enhance your living experience than learning a new language? Maybe French -- the language of love? Or Spanish, the official language of Mexico, Argentina, Chile, the majority of Central and South America. Not to mention, you'll join nearly 67 million Americans who speak a foreign language at home. Impressive!
How to get started:
Begin with the ever popular subscription service Rosetta Stone, the industry-leading way for individuals looking to learn a new language. Not to mention, there are countless apps geared towards both serious learners and beginners. That said, Duolingo, LinguaLift, Babbel and MindSnacks are all awesome options for the learner on-the-go.
2.Take A Dance Class
Great for the mind, body and soul, taking a dance class is a surefire way to add a pinch of spice to your life! The options are endless: ballet, hip hop, swing dancing, salsa, contemporary dance, etc. The best part? You're never too old to start!
How to get started:
YouTube isn't just for influencers! In fact, the internet's leading social network is chock full of tutorials from leading dance groups to individuals simply dancing for shits and giggles.
3.Try Your Hand At Acting
The benefits are physical, emotional, and social! You'll learn how to think outside-of-the-box, improve your verbal and nonverbal communication skills and gain a new sense of self-confidence!
How to get started:
Discover local acting classes on meetup.com. Complete a Google search for "acting classes in my area," or explore adult activities at a local community college or theater.
4.Spice Things Up With A Cooking Class
Sure, cooking is a basic survival skill. But, it's also a lot of fun. Whether it's tacos, classic Italian cuisine, or sushi -- food can sometimes act as the heartbeat of conversation and connection. So why wouldn't preparing it be any different?
How to get started:
Invest in a unique cooking class -- Sur la Table is located nationwide and offers classes ranging from a Homemade Ravioli Workshop to Knife Skills 101. Or, cook with family and friends by way of a meal subscription box. Airbnb just recently launched Airbnb Cooking Experiences due to bookings for food and drinks being so in-demand. Currently, the platform offers over 3,000 cooking classes in over 75 countries worldwide. So get in where you fit in.
5.Spinning Class
By now, you've heard of "spin class" or "indoor cycling". The atmosphere oozes teamwork and the playlist is pretty sick too (especially if you opt for a fun class like Vibe Ride's Trap It & Twerk It Ride)! With classes ranging from 45 minutes to an hour, you'll burn anywhere from 600-1000 calories and strut out feeling like you're ready to take on the world!
How to get started:
Begin with visiting some of the more popular studios like CYCLEBAR, which offer a complimentary first class. Happen to fall in love and the studio isn't your thing? There's a variety of cycling bikes you can buy for home use.
6.Improv Comedy
Connect with like-hearted lovers of comedy by trying your hand at live theater. You'll be forced to come out of your shell and, much like work and life, channel your inner teamplayer when tasked to create challenging scenes on stage.
How to get started:
If you're considering getting into improv, the best way to know for sure is to take a class. Joining a class will teach you more about the genre itself as well as equip you with all the tools necessary to fine-tune your craft. There are different levels, including a beginner's class, so you'll feel welcomed and supported as you enter the unknown.
7.Learn An Instrument
Learning an instrument doesn't only reduce stress and cultivate creativity, it increases discipline, emotional perception and confidence. Can you say win-win?!
How to get started:
Currently on my bucket list, getting started is as simple as checking out local used instrument options. For example, OfferUp, and good ole Craigslist all have awesome options on a budget. The best part? Should you discover you're not very musically inclined, it's a modest hit to your wallet.
8.Paint-and-Sip
Group activities aren't just for team-building. They're a great way to express yourself, meet new people and enjoy one of the most ancient forms of human communication; art. Fortunately for paint-and-sip classes, if you're not quite Picasso, you'll have a glass of bubbly to wash it down.
How to get started easily:
Check out Groupon, LivingSocial, and Localflavor "things to do", and you're bound to land on a variety of local paint-and-sip options.
9.Do-It-Yourself (DIY)
Fancy yourself a pioneer kind of woman? Level up your craft game by exploring the world of do-it-yourself.
How to get started:
Grab a book on DIY and begin by fixing something around your house, add some flair to your wardrobe or give your family and friends homemade gifts for the holidays. You'll learn a new skill while enjoying a favorite pastime!
10.Pay It Forward
Looking for added fulfilment or purpose in your life? What better way to pay-it-forward than by volunteering for a cause you're passionate about. You could help people in underserved communities, fight for the environment or take care of homeless animals.
How to get started:
Begin in your local community. There are countless ways to volunteer at local soup kitchens, shelters for women and children, the Salvation Army, Goodwill, your church and more.
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Some women have their whole wedding planned out, from the bridal gown and venue to the bridal party and playlist. However, KJ was not one of those people. “I didn’t foresee a wedding in my future,” she reveals. “I was just gonna be the boss chick, rich auntie. I didn’t force love in my life until recently. I never had an idea of what a dream wedding would look like, it was easier for me to elope.”
KJ Smith
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
And to many people’s surprise, that was their original plan – until Skyh brought up a valid concern. He was raised by his grandmother and thought she should be at the wedding, and naturally, that led to KJ wanting her grandmother to be there as well – then her mom – and later her sister – and, you’ve gotta invite the besties too, right? From there, the guest list continued to blossom. Much like the updo and pop of color bold red lip, she wore on her special day, which was initially on her Pinterest board as a soft glam look with her hair hanging on her shoulders, KJ is okay with changing her plan if it brings her and her loved ones happiness.
So let’s get into the wedding, which took place in Malibu, CA. The first thing you should know about the celebrity couple is that they’re non-traditional. They know, and they don’t care. So, in true unconventional fashion, they shared the morning of the wedding together.
“I woke up with Skyh, we walked our dog, had black coffee, and said good morning to the people who stayed at the venue with us,” she says.
Now, it was time for hair and makeup. While she was getting glammed up, she had Black-owned McBride Sisters wine and champagne (which ties into The Black Experience theme) on deck with her mom and friends, had her besties help rework her vows, retried on every outfit (sis is very Type-A), took photos, and ended the early-celebration with prayer and meditation. It seems very non-Bridezilla, I said.
“Yeah, I was the most unbothered bride ever. Everyone was just so supportive. As entertainers, we go on red carpets all the time. We actually have a production company,” she explains. “The get-ready process was like a day at work, but with people we love the most. Being entertainers, we didn’t feel stressed at all, but my excitement was so high.”
Things moved quickly, and before she knew it, it was time to line up to walk down the aisle.
“Yeah, I was the most unbothered bride ever. Everyone was just so supportive. As entertainers, we go on red carpets all the time. We actually have a production company. The get-ready process was like a day at work, but with people we love the most. Being entertainers, we didn’t feel stressed at all, but my excitement was so high.”
KJ Smith and her bridal party
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
Since everything started with their grandmothers, the couple wanted to ensure they honored them and planned to keep an element of their wedding traditional. Although we’ve all seen the reception videos and photos online, you may have noticed visuals from the wedding itself are harder to find.
“We planned for it to be traditional, but we’re not like that, so we tried to create those moments. We jumped the broom and had a salt ceremony (where the bride and groom individually pour salt into a glass container, symbolizing their lives becoming one.) But honestly, still, nothing was traditional about it.”
She goes on to explain that her mom caught the holy ghost coming down the aisle, her glam team was on deck, and she became so nervous with excitement that she had an anxiety attack – something she struggled with for years, she explains tearfully. Her friends had to literally cheer her down the aisle because of how overwhelmed she felt until she eventually calmed down.
“Skyh was standing there with his hand on his heart; we have our own little language, and I could feel the support,” she shares.
It was surprising to hear all these emotional moments happened before the party we saw online. That is until she once again got into the backstory.
“As a Black woman actress, for so long, it was popular to be mysterious and secretive, but that’s not who I am or what I like. Plus, we both wanted to create an experience for everyone there. We are the people who always host family and friends,” she says. “Like for me, the first order of business was getting sandals for the women so they can dance all night long. We had oxtail, D'ussé, and a coffee and sativa lounge – which is part of Skyh and I’s lifestyle and routine. We wanted to bring them into our world.”
Skyh Black (L) and KJ Smith (R)
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
She went on to discuss the dance routine she did for her husband at the reception, which has taken over the internet. Apparently, that’s another thing that didn’t go according to plan. According to KJ, she had promised a performance at their joint bachelor/ bachelorette party, but her outfit got stolen from her car. So, Skyh ended up performing for her – complete with a strip tease. Still, she never forgot her promise to dance for him.
So, she hired her friend as a choreographer, learned the routine, made friends and family watch it endless times, and attended Beyoncé’s Renaissance show a few days before for a confidence boost. It ended up being a show to remember. But that wasn’t all the night offered. Lil Mo performed, and the guests received special goody bags featuring their favorite Black-owned products like journals, hair care, and more.
“We made sure everyone was taken care of all night. That kind of stuff makes us happy. I wanted everyone there to experience the joy and love I have for myself, my partner, and for them. I wanted them to feel full and whole, and they had the time of their lives,” she says.
But naturally, the internet is going to internet, and while there were countless people praising the event and applauding the newlyweds, some thought it was too over the top. I was curious to know her thoughts on some of the criticism.
“It’s cool. We did what we wanted to do. I’ve decided to share my world with people. Just how I went on social media platforms and found inspiration, I want people to do the same,” she explains. “I don’t think it's fair to my supporters not to give that out. There’s so much I wanna share with brides, specifically Black brides. I love that people are adding it to their Pinterest boards."
"I wanted everyone there to experience the joy and love I have for myself, my partner, and for them. I wanted them to feel full and whole, and they had the time of their lives."
KJ Smith
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
“I’m happy with it because we did what we wanted to do. They can do what they wanna do. Don’t be cruel, though, because you will get blocked,” she said, laughing.
The more I spoke with her, the more her sense of freedom shined through. People are always going to have their opinions, but at the end of the day, it’s you who has to live your life, and it seems like the couple realizes that and embraces that power. She also stressed the importance of not living for others and the lessons life has taught her.
“I’ve been to countless weddings, and I’ve been in countless weddings. I’m a generally older bride. So when women in my demographic get married, and you and your husband are busy working people like us, you deserve to have the one you want to have,” she shares.
“This is what we wanted to do. Our loved ones love and support us. We did so much to honor them, but we also wanted to start our own tradition, legacy, and creation. I'm not going to be pulled back into ideas of the past when I’m trying to create a future with my partner. “
If you’d like to see more of the couple, you probably won’t have to wait long. Although no content is planned yet, she admits to being an oversharer. “Me being open and transparent about my experiences lets people know it’s okay to have flaws; it makes you human, and for many years, I didn’t believe that was okay. I had pressure to be perfect, and I’d crumble every time,” she explains to xoNecole.
Now, she owns her flaws and uses them as a superpower to connect with her community and feel and express her love.
“Some people give us [Skyh and KJ] a hard time because they say we just seem too perfect. I’m like, why is that a bad thing? I love the people I love. From my man to my mama, to my friends - unabashedly. We move through time and space how we want to move. If we did it another way, we’d let ourselves and our union down.”
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Feature image by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
But if there’s one skincare ingredient that can deliver an all-in-one solution to most skincare concerns, it’s retinol.
What Is Retinol?
As the darling of the skincare space, retinol is a vitamin-A derivative that is used to reduce the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles, improve skin texture, increase collagen production, and enhance cell turnover, leading to smoother and more youthful-looking skin.
How Does Retinol Work?
Retinol, which is commonly found in creams, serums, and other skincare formulations, works in several ways that benefit the skin. It promotes cellular turnover by encouraging the removal of old skin cells and the production of new, healthier ones, improving skin texture and reducing fine lines. Additionally, retinol stimulates collagen production, which combats wrinkled skin and helps to unclog pores, making it an effective ingredient to use against acne and enlarged pores.
Because the body can not produce vitamin A on its own, it needs to be provided through dietary intake and topical application to the skin via skincare products.
How To Start Using Retinol
Because retinol is an active skincare ingredient, it’s important to start adding it into your skincare routine gradually and taking note of your skin’s sensitivity and how your skin responds to it. If you're new to retinol, it's advised to begin with a lower concentration (at least 0.25% retinol) and allow your skin to acclimate by starting once a week or every other night.
As your skin becomes more accustomed to retinol over time, you can then gradually increase the frequency. After a few weeks, you may be able to use it every night, but some people may find that using it every other night or a few times a week is sufficient.
Always listen to your skin and pay close attention to how your skin reacts to the usage of retinol. Experiencing dryness, redness, flaking, or irritation while using retinol is normal, but it could be a sign that you may be using retinol too often or at too high a concentration. While it can be frustrating to go through the trial-and-error phase of using retinol, adjusting the frequency of use or switching to a milder formulation can yield the best results while minimizing potential side effects.
And, of course, always use sunscreen.
To get you started on your retinol journey, here are some of the best beginner-friendly retinol serums and creams to try out for yourself:
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Featured image by Renata Angerami/Getty Images
