The day I closed on my first home was met with mixed emotions. On one hand, I was excited to take a big step in my life and towards my financial goals. I had found the perfect investment property that would serve as my primary residence for at least the next year—a cute little bungalow in an area that was sure to significantly increase my property value in a few years.
Yet, there was a bit of anxiety as I walked through the door. Was I making the right decision? Would buying this home be a blessing and not a curse? Would I be cleared to close, or would one final run of my credit report show something that would stop me from being able to purchase the home?
I swallowed my fears, said a little prayer, and proceeded with the process of signing on the dotted line. The home was officially mine, and getting the keys to my new abode brought a wave of pride. But as I would later discover while making my new house a home, there were many things I wished I had considered before buying my first home, and even more so now that I’m in my second one.
“Purchasing a home is a beautiful experience,” shares Lauren Cobb, realtor at Keller Williams Peachtree Road in Atlanta, Georgia. “I’ve seen real estate change the lives of many clients, including myself, by buying at the right time and within budget. It’s also a unique experience for each buyer. No buyer has the same experience as their family or peers.”
With that in mind, here are five tips I wish I'd known before buying my first home.
1.The underwriting process is thorough; they will examine everything.
The underwriting process for my first home went relatively smoothly. I had just gotten out of debt and had a great credit score. I’d been at my job for four years, so I could show consistent income. I didn’t have any student loans or car payments to consider, and I didn’t anticipate taking on any new debt. I was glad I had worked hard to get my finances in order before going into underwriting. But it’s not always that easy, and here’s why.
Once you get pre-approved, you should generally expect your lender to ask for one month of pay stubs, two months of bank statements, and two years of W-2s to start the underwriting process. This can vary depending on the type of loan you’re going for, where your income comes from (W-2, your own business, etc.), and the industry you work in. During this time, you shouldn’t take on any new credit as they will compare your original credit report to the one pulled right before closing.
In HGTV host Egypt Sherrod’s book Keep Calm, It’s Just Real Estate: Your No-Stress Guide to Buying a Home, she shares that “banks approve you for your mortgage based upon your credit score and savings at the time of approval. Your approval is contingent upon those items remaining the same through closing.” In other words, any new additional debts will impact your loan from closing. Even something as simple as using Afterpay or Klarna will be treated as an installment loan, and you will be asked to provide documentation for that transaction.
I recommend not making any major purchases before you close on your home as it can determine if you get a final approval to close and the interest rate. This will make your process much smoother, and you will be more likely to see the sweet words “Please see your attached final CD,” letting you know that you’ve successfully cleared underwriting and are approved to close.
2.Property taxes and insurance can significantly increase your monthly payments.
Tetra Images/Getty Images
One of the main reasons that many of us buy a home is that we’re hoping to escape the neverending rent increase that we’re presented with at the end of our lease. While a fixed-rate mortgage offers predictable monthly payments, what’s not often shared is how property tax and insurance increases can impact your mortgage payments.
I admittedly was caught by surprise when last year my mortgage went up by $400 because the county assessed my property value to be higher than years prior. If you purchase a home in an area where homes increase in value at a faster rate than others, you may find that the increased equity that you’re celebrating comes at a price, and depending on your budget that price may make or break whether or not you can still afford the home.
One way to combat rising property costs is to look into your state’s homestead exemption laws. According to the National Association of Realtors, the homestead exemption, at its core, “reduces the taxable value of a homeowner's primary residence, meaning a portion of the home value will not be taxed. This reduction results in lower property tax bills.” This exemption only applies to your primary residence and the requirements vary from state to state, but if you do qualify, it can save you from extreme hikes in property taxes and thousands of dollars over time.
3.Your mortgage impacts your debt-to-income ratio, affecting your ability to qualify for other credit.
In an ideal world, your mortgage would be less than the cost of rent you were proverbially shaking your fist over. But in reality, that’s not always the case. Due to high interest rates, the increasing cost of homeownership, and the type of home you’re looking for, you may find yourself paying more than you were before in rent (but hey, at least it’s going toward something that could potentially be an asset one day, right? Right?!).
Your lender may approve you for a higher monthly payment, but it’s not until you move into your lovely abode and attempt to apply for new credit or even refinance months or years down the road that you learn that with a higher monthly payment, you’ve also increased your debt-to-income (DTI) ratio. This is a number that lenders use to determine if you’re a good candidate for credit approval, and even a couple of hundred dollars can push you beyond the DTI they’re comfortable with approving.
If your income is increasing and you’re not taking on other debt, this may not be an issue for you. But as we all know, life happens, so it’s always good to be prepared and to plan accordingly in case you find yourself in need of credit in the future.
4.Ask the seller for a credit to help lower your out-of-pocket costs.
Westend61/Getty Image
One thing that held me back from buying sooner was assuming that I would need a lot more cash available for closing. While you should always be prepared to pay the estimated closing costs shared with you by the lender, it’s good to know that the final amount may be higher or lower than what is on the final Closing Disclosure (CD). One way to potentially lower that amount is to negotiate a seller credit.
A seller credit is money that the seller gives the buyer at closing, usually lowering your out-of-pocket closing costs. The main way to negotiate this is to use your inspection report to get an estimate of the cost of any repairs that the report highlights. For example, when I purchased my home, I knew from the inspection report that the HVAC was 18 years old and would need replacement soon. I reached out to a few different HVAC companies to get estimates on the cost of replacing the unit and used the highest estimate to negotiate with the seller to cover the cost of replacing the HVAC. I did the same with a few other needed repairs, and the seller agreed to contribute a $10,000 seller credit to cover these costs. This reduced my closing costs from $24,456 to $14,456.
Sometimes, the seller will even offer a credit upfront to incentivize the buyer to go under contract, especially if the home has been on the market for some time and/or they are looking to sell quickly. While these deals aren’t always easy to find, nor are sellers required to provide them, it’s good to know that it’s a possible option in case you’re looking for a way to lower your out-of-pocket costs.
5.Negotiate with the seller to buy down the interest rate.
Anyone who has been home shopping in the last couple of years can attest that current mortgage rates are high compared to rates during the pandemic, which, according to Investopedia, reached as low as 2.65% in January 2021 for 30-year, fixed-rate mortgages. Even a small increase in your mortgage rate can significantly raise your monthly payments and potentially price you out of your desired home. But there’s good news!
Similar to a seller credit, you can potentially negotiate a rate buydown with the seller. A rate buydown allows the buyer to secure a lower interest rate by having the seller pay the lender to reduce the interest rate. For example, you may have locked in a 7.5% fixed interest rate with your lender, but thanks to your realtor negotiating a buydown with the seller, they are willing to contribute enough money to lower your rate to 7%. Sellers are sometimes motivated to do this as it can often be cheaper than lowering the price of their home. A lower mortgage rate can significantly reduce your monthly payment and save you thousands of dollars over the lifetime of your mortgage.
—
Navigating the home-buying process can be overwhelming, but understanding these key factors can help you make more informed decisions and save you thousands of dollars in the long run. Keep these tips in mind to ensure a smoother, more rewarding home-buying experience.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Lock Stock/Getty Images
RELATED
So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.
In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.
In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.
And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.
We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.
So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.
That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.
This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
Featured image by xoStaff
Then there were those who gave up their zip code altogether and found a permanent home in the skies. After years spent recruiting students for a university, Lisa-Gaye Shakespeare became a full-time travel influencer and founded her travel company, Shakespeare Agency. And she's not alone.
These stories mirror the experiences of women across the world. For millions, the pandemic induced a seismic shift in priorities and desires. Corporate careers that were once hailed as the ultimate “I made it” moment in one's career were pushed to the back burner as women quit their jobs in search of a more self-fulfilling purpose.
xoNecole spoke to these three Black women who used the pandemic as a springboard to make their wildest dreams a reality, the lessons they learned, and posed the question of whether they’ll ever return to cubicle life.
Answers have been edited for context and length.
xoNecole: How did the pandemic lead to you leaving the cubicle?
Randi: I was becoming stagnant. I was working in mortgage and banking but I felt like my personality was too big for that job! From there, I transitioned to radio but was laid off during the pandemic. That’s what made me go full throttle with entrepreneurship.
Gabrielle: I moved around a lot for work. Five times over a span of seven years. I knew I needed a break because I had experienced so much. So, I just quit one day. Effective immediately. I didn’t know what I was going to do, I just knew I needed a break and to just regroup.
Lisa-Gaye: I was working in recruiting at a university and my dream job just kind of fell into my lap! But, I never got to fully enjoy it before the world shut down in March [2020] and I was laid off. On top of that, I was stuck in Miami because Jamaica had closed its borders due to the pandemic before I was able to return.
Randi O
xoN: Tell us about your journey after leaving Corporate America.
Randi: I do it all now! I have a podcast, I’m an on-air talent, I act, and I own a public relations company that focuses on social media engagement. It’s all from my network. When you go out and start a business, you can’t just say, “Okay I’m done with Corporate America,” and “Let me do my own thing.” If you don’t build community, if you don’t build a network it's going to be very hard to sustain.
Gabrielle: I realized in New York, there was not a lot to do for Black lesbians and queer folks. We don’t really have dedicated bars and spaces so I started doing events and it took off. I started focusing on my brand, Raw Honey. I opened a co-working space, and I was able to host an NYC Pride event in front of 100,000 people. I hit the ground running with Raw Honey. My events were all women coming to find community and come together with other lesbians and queer folks. I found my purpose in that.
Lisa-Gaye: After being laid off, I wrote out all of my passions and that’s how I came up with [my company] Shakespeare Agency. It was all of the things that I loved to do under one umbrella. The pandemic pulled that out of me. I had a very large social media following, so I pitched to hotels that I would feature them on my blog and social media. This reignited my passion for travel. I took the rest of the year to refocus my brand to focus solely on being a content creator within the travel space.
Gabrielle
xoN: What have you learned about yourself during your time as an entrepreneur?
Randi: [I learned] the importance of my network and community that I created. When I was laid off I was still keeping those relationships with people that I used to work with. So it was easy for me to transition into social media management and I didn’t have to start from scratch.
Gabrielle: The biggest thing I learned about myself was my own personal identity as a Black lesbian and how much I had assimilated into straight and corporate culture and not being myself. Now, I feel comfortable and confident being my authentic self. Now, I'm not sacrificing anything else for my career. I have a full life. I have friends. I have a social life. And when you are happy and have a full quality of life, I feel like [I] can have more longevity in my career.
Lisa-Gaye: [I'm doing] the best that I've ever done. The discipline that I’m building within myself. Nobody is saying, ‘Oh you have to be at work at this time.’ There’s no boss saying, ‘Why are you late?’ But, if I’m laying in bed at 10 a.m. then it's me saying [to myself], 'Okay, Lisa, get up, it's time for you to start working!’ That’s all on me.
xoNecole: What mistakes do you want to help people avoid when leaving Corporate America?
Randi: You have to learn about the highs and lows of entrepreneurship. You have a fast season and a slow season and I started to learn that when you're self-employed the latter season hits hard. Don't get caught up on the lows, just keep going and don't stop. I’m glad I did.
Gabrielle: I think everyone should quit their job and just figure it out for a second. You will discover so much about yourself when you take a second to just focus on you. Your skill set will always be there. You can’t be afraid of what will happen when you bet on yourself.
Lisa-Gaye: When it comes to being an influencer the field is saturated and a lot of people suffer from imposter syndrome. There is nothing wrong with being an imposter but find out how to make it yours, how to make it better. If you go to the store, you see 10 million different brands of bread! But you are choosing the brand that you like because you like that particular flavor.
So be an imposter, but be the best imposter of yourself and add your own flair, your own flavor. Make the better bread. The bread that you want.
Lisa-Gaye Shakespeare
xoNecole: Will you ever return to your 9 to 5?
Randi: I wouldn’t go back to Corporate America. But I don’t mind working under someone. A lot of people try to get into this business saying, “I can't work under anyone.” That’s not necessarily the reason to start a business because you're always going to answer to somebody. Clients, brands, there’s always someone else involved.
Gabrielle: I went back! I really needed a break and I gave myself that. But, I realized I’m a corporate girl, [and] I enjoy the work that I do. I’m good at it and I really missed that side of myself. I have different sides of me and my whole identity is not Raw Honey or my queerness. A big side of me is business and that’s why I love having my career. Now I feel like my best self.
Lisa-Gaye: I really don’t. For right now, I love working for myself. It's gratifying, it's challenging, it's exciting. It’s a big deal for me to say I own my own business. That I am my own boss, and I'm a Black woman doing it.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image courtesy of Lisa-Gaye Shakespeare
Originally published on February 6, 2023