2020 will high-key be its own history book but it has also provided many opportunities to be more still, intentional and truly value time and healing. I don't know about you but as a Cancer and an empath, self-care manifests as lighting candles. My relationship with myself has never been more important. I owe it to myself to give the same compassionate energy to Joce as I do to my loved ones.
Finding candles that radiate self-love is one way to do that. As the seasons change, we want to be prepared for Seasonal Affective Disorder and general happiness. We have found that creating rituals and including candles makes for positive effects on your mood. Take a look at some uplifting scents that will empower you to devote more time to yourself!
*This list is specially curated by the xoNecole team and some links are affiliate links. If you purchase an item from an affiliate link, xoNecole might earn a small commission.
Ryan Porter Candle - Calm Down
Urban Outfitters
With scents that range from watermelon and champagne, to floral and teak, Ryan Porter offers a collection of pink 100 percent soy wax candles that come in sleek glasses with labels that feature bold lettering where attitude and ambience meet. This one in particular is the "Girl, You Need To Calm The F Down" candle and features Japanese cherry blossom and teak scents. The candle itself is as calming as it is aesthetically pleasing.
P.F. Candle Co. Amber Jar 12 oz Soy Candle - Amber + Moss
P.F. Candle Co.
With calming woodsy musk, sage, lavender, amber, and citrus notes, you are sure to feel elevated and rejuvenated after adding this candle to your self-care ritual. Be it daily or weekly, we believe you'll feel centered after burning this candle and setting your intentions.
ScentualGoddess Handmade Intention Candle - SELF CARE
ScentualGoddess/Etsy
What better way to practice self-care than with a candle that has affirmations plastered on top? It reads:
- I tune into my soul and ask what I need to feel nourished
- I treat myself with love, kindness and compassion
- I set healthy boundaries
- I allow myself to rest and rejuvenate for my well-being
Madewell - Rosewood Cassis Candle
Madewell
Speaking of intentions, lighting up this Madewell best-seller might just be what the universe ordered. The soy candle has the reminiscent indulgence of "a sunny afternoon in a French garden" with notes of rose, pear, green ivy, and cassis lulling you into instant calm. Let the pampering begin!
True North Navigation - RENEW Candle
True North Navigation/Etsy
Remember when Whitley Gilbert taught us how to "relax, relate, release"? Now it's time to Refresh, Renew and Revive. The eucalyptus refreshes your mood, the bamboo renews your mind, and the peppermint revives your body. Best of all, you can save the planet by reusing the tin as a jewelry holder or office supply container. Each candle in the collection costs $9.
Cancelled Plans Candle - Student Loans
Urban Outfitters
Looking to immerse yourself in calm and peaceful vibes? Cop this candle! A soothing blend of apricot wax and coconut wax, this relatable candle by Cancelled Plans is the perfect addition to your self-care day. Bask in the luxurious aroma of vanilla, citrus, coconut, sea salt, cardamom, dark musk, and plum.
Uncommon Goods - Sunday Morning Candle
Uncommon Goods
If you're looking for a lazy Sunday with a wick, prepare to burn some inner zen in your life with the help of this Sunday Morning Candle. The handmade vegetable wax candle consists of floral and fruity notes like pear, amber woods, bergamot, gardenia, and jasmine.
WildflowerByAna Aromatherapy Candle - Tranquility
WildflowerByAna/Etsy
Burn one of these for bath time or meditation or just because you feel like it. Created to invigorate feelings of tranquility with the help of its hypnotic blend of lavender, clary sage, and lemon, this candle is perfect for aromatherapy. WildflowerByAna also offers an array of other candles that meet additional desires like Focus, Motivation, Sensuality, and Happiness.
Crate and Barrel - Empower Scented Candle
Crate and Barrel
With their Empower scented candle, Crate and Barrel has managed to craft a fragrant masterpiece. The candle, made of essential oils and soy wax, has notes of orange, grapefruit, sage, lavender, oak moss, and amber. The fruity, sweet-smelling candle is the perfect way to bring in calming vibes. Plus, for every purchase, Crate and Barrel makes a $10 donation to VOW to End Child Marriage.
The Spa Girl Life - Glow From Within Inspiration Candle with Two Citrine Crystals
The Spa Girl Life
If you haven't noticed yet, candles and crystals go together like peanut butter and jelly. The Spa Girl Life designed the Glow From Within Candle to help you release anger with the soothing scents of ylang-ylang flower and the power of the citrine crystal. The woes of the world may have you down, in order for you to take care of you, you need to release it back into the universe. Try saying this mantra when igniting the flame, "I allow the fire within me to shine brightly, I happily and easily continue on my path."
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The mother of one reached her breaking point after failing to continue her 685-day blue-dot streak on Peleton due to having a busy day with her daughter. Achieving the beloved blue dot was like receiving a gold star for her hard work, and it meant everything to her. So, once she lost it, she literally lost it, breaking down into tears. However, that vulnerable moment helped her to reexamine her life and inspired her to write Stop Waiting For Perfect. While writing the book, she had to face another perfectionist trait: procrastination. As a fellow journalist, I can relate. The term deadline junkie didn’t come from anywhere. L’Oreal explains how procrastination relates to perfectionism.
“I think there were seven different types of perfectionism I read about (you can take a quiz to see what type of perfectionist you are here), and when I found out that procrastination was one of them because, I never thought of myself as a procrastinator. I would just sometimes wait until the last minute, right before the deadline,” she says. “So, I was like, okay, that's not that, but then when I started to think about okay, like, because when you're procrastinating, at least for me, and for a lot of perfectionists, it's like, well, when I sit down in front of this Google Doc like for all the writers out there, I have to know exactly what I'm going to say and I have to say it perfectly. There's no room for error. There's no room for experimentation, and what that does, though, is it prevents us from just putting words on paper.”
Photo courtesy of L'Oreal Thompson Payton
She continues her explanation by sharing a tweet that became her aha moment in her writing process. “There was a tweet that came across as I was writing the first draft of the book that said, ‘you're, or you can edit bad, but you can't edit enough,’ and that really unlocked for me like, okay, my job is to put words on a paper.”
In other words, waiting for the perfect moment is holding you back, but as I mentioned earlier, we are here to help. L’Oreal provides a few tips on letting go of perfectionism while still maintaining success in your life. you can set mini goals and have people you can trust hold you accountable. “If our dream is to launch the podcast in January 2024, what then can you do right now in September 2023, and then October and November, etc., to set yourself up for success because I think that a lot of times we go into it– it has to be perfect on the first one,” she explains.
“I have to come out the gate with this, you know, like masterpiece, and that is just unrealistic, and it's not even holding yourself to a high standard. It's holding yourself to an impossible standard and so giving yourself some grace along the way, allowing for experimentation to try something, and then pivoting when it doesn't work. But first, you have to put it out there, and finding people that you know and trust and who are going to support you along the way is really important.”
What’s on the other side of managing perfectionism? Freedom. Thanks to what she refers to as her “wake-up call,” she now prioritizes rest and no longer beats herself up for not meeting certain standards, and yes, that pertains to receiving a blue dot on Peleton.
“It's been a process and very much progress over perfection because there are moments where I slip, but forgiving myself and then trying again, I think, is like the whole point and purpose of it,” she says. And in the midst of unlearning these unhealthy habits, she’s having healthy conversations with her daughter about boundaries, self-love, and listening to her body.
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Feature image courtesy of Chuck Olu-Alabi
