

5 Realistic Ways To Kick The Sunday Scaries To The Curb For Good
Ah, the Sunday Scaries. It seems a catchy title or cliche name has been given to almost all common age-old experiences, especially with the power and reach of social media. But real talk, the anxiety that hits many of us when we think about facing yet another Monday, is horrifyingly annoying, especially since a lot of times it’s tied to financial and family obligations that we can’t ignore.
For me, I’ve made friends with the Sunday Scaries at various times in my career journey. In the early years, they were prompted by the eagerness to please and move up the ladder at my first few dream jobs in publishing. In later years, as I set out for full-time self-employment, the Sunday Scaries showed their face again, this time due to the utter trepidation that comes with not only attracting and keeping clients and getting steady work but the process of juggling multiple deliverables for those clients.
So, how did I ultimately conquer the Sunday Scaries for good? Here are a few helpful steps I took:
pixdeluxe/Getty Images
1. I got honest with myself about what was truly triggering the Sunday Scaries in the first place.
I began to write and noticed that there were various things that contributed to the nagging feeling on Sundays, which is how I was able to acknowledge that those feelings don’t necessarily mean I need to up and quit a job or give life to falsehoods like, ‘I just hate my life.’ For me, fear and insecurity were at the core of welcoming the Sunday Scaries into my weekly routine.
2. Based on those triggers, I wrote down solutions.
Sometimes, it was simply a lack of time management, a fear of failure, or over-commitment to work that I wasn’t really passionate about doing. I found I could implement solutions like:
- Shifting how I spend my Fridays so I’d have more time to spend strictly on self-love, pleasure, and fun.
- Talking with my clients or managers to find out if I could shift away from doing certain tasks and focus more on the work I loved and was great at doing.
- Letting go of projects, jobs, or clients that just didn’t serve my end goal or feed my creative advancement. (In one very unusual experience, I actually did quit after two weeks, and it was the best decision I could’ve made at the time.)
- Taking on weekend chores I really don’t like doing (like laundry, meal prepping, working out, or shopping) during the week.
StockSeller_ukr/Getty Images
- Constantly exploring new job and career opportunities and fun ways to feed my urge to live freely, explore other aspects of life, and avoid feelings of being caged in by routine or monotony. (I grew up in a strict Christian household, so, as an adult, I really don’t like anything that sparks feelings of extreme restriction or lack of control. I found that sometimes the Sunday Scaries were nothing but rebellion clothed in fear, so to balance that, I often explore all my options and create multiple plans of action for things I want to do in life.)
- Going to therapy to talk more about processing through triggers and healthy ways to combat or eliminate them. (I’m still a Christian and enjoy the good things about my upbringing, but there were a few toxic and traumatic routines and memories that really were at the core of why I’d get the Sunday Scaries.)
3. I weighed the return on investment for the essential but not-so-sexy tasks of my job or career.
As much as this is said and written a lot, you’re not going to like every single thing about your job, and the journey is not always consistently blissful. Sometimes certain parts of work cultures, project management processes, or whatever it takes to be a success at work can be downright annoying, nerve-wracking, challenging, and tedious.
As long as I enjoy more things about work than I hate—and the not-so-appetizing but necessary tasks serve a bigger picture of purpose in my career journey—I can realistically say to hell with the Sunday Scaries and take on all that my job entails with humility, confidence, and conviction.
4. I began waking up earlier and scheduling at least 30 minutes on Monday mornings just for my self-care.
No checking emails. No taking care of others. No prepping anything. No scrolling anything. I’d sit in silence, re-watch an episode of one of my favorite Netflix shows, read a book, pray, or make myself a great breakfast to my favorite morning playlist on Spotify or YouTube.
I’d also put my phone in a cabinet or drawer during my me-time, as it often tempts me to check an email or get too immersed in watching hundreds of Reels.
Luis Alvirez/Getty Images
5. I found something focused on wonder and play to do every Monday (or every other) so that I could look forward to it the night before.
For me, it’s planning a trip or doing something that takes me into another cultural experience as if I’m traveling, like visiting an authentic Greek or Mexican restaurant.
It also could be taking a new dance class, going for a walk in a new location I hadn’t explored, or hanging out with family. And I literally schedule this time on Mondays, like an appointment or meeting—on my calendar—where I am, for the most part, unavailable for anything else during that hour or so that I’ve given myself.
Bonus: I got radical and cleared out my calendar on Mondays.
I once worked with an executive who’d block out a certain day of the week just to go golfing. If you’re self-employed, a freelancer, or you have seniority in your department or company, clear out your Mondays on your calendar, sis. Be deliberate about eliminating the problem altogether. Set boundaries with your clients, teams, or others so that they know you’re simply unavailable and will not be working. Even if you’re not the boss, you can ask for that day off or shift your work week to Tuesday-Saturday. Another compromise: Work remotely on Mondays.
Get honest with yourself about why those Sunday Scaries keep disrupting your peace, and begin to advocate for yourself. Find out where there might be some ways for you to get the mental break you need on Mondays so that they’re not getting the best of you. Tap into your support system, and get rid of routines, so-called norms, and influences that do not serve your end goals or quality of life.
As ambitious, capable, and beautiful Black queens, we must own our time and honor the gift that God has given us—empowered and fearless.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by LaylaBird/Getty Images
Black women are not a monolith. We all are deserving of healing and wholeness despite what we've been through, how much money we have in the bank, or what we look like. Most importantly, we are enough—even when we are not working, earning, or serving.
Welcome to Black Girl Whole, your space to find the wellness routine that aligns with you! This brand-new marketplace by xoNecole is a safe space for Black women to activate their healing, find the inspiration to rest, and receive reassurance that we are one small act away from finding our happiness.
Want to discover where you are on your wellness journey? You don't have to look far. In partnership with European Wax Center, we're bringing you a customized wellness quiz to help you up your wellness game. Answer our short series of questions to figure out which type of wellness lover you are, what you need to bring more balance into your life, and then go deeper by shopping products geared towards clearing your mind, healing your body, and soothing your spirit.
Ready to get whole? Take our quiz now!
Ciara, Rihanna, And 6 Other Celebrities Who Announced Pregnancies In 2023
Congratulations are in order for Ciara and her husband, Denver Broncos quarterback Russell Wilson. The couple recently announced they were expecting their third child on social media days after the singer released her new track "How We Roll" featuring Chris Brown. Ciara and Russell share a daughter Sienna Wilson,6, and a three-year-old son Win Wilson. The "Level Up" vocalist also has a 9-year-old son, Future Zahir Wilburn, with rapper Future.
In the pair's respective posts, Ciara is seen posing in what appears to be a form-fitting bodysuit, displaying her baby bump, and dancing to one of the verses in "How We Roll. The verse said, "You look at me like that again, we make another kid. You my heart, I'm your rib."
Since then, Ciara and Russell's loved ones and fans have been celebrating the exciting news by sending well wishes to the happy couple.
But the Wilsons aren’t the only ones who are expecting. Here’s a list of other celebrities that have announced their pregnancies and or welcomed their little ones this year
Sanya Richards-Ross
Real Housewives of Atlanta star and Olympian Sanya Richards-Ross and her husband, former football player Aaron Ross, announced they were expecting their second child together last month after uploading various images from their People magazine photoshoot.
In the post, the 38-year-old opened up about the struggles she and Ross faced before her second pregnancy and how excited everyone is for the new addition's arrival in December, including the couple's son Aaron Ross Jr.
"Some things happen in our lives to remind us that there are no guarantees. To go from not being sure if I wanted to have another baby, to deciding that I was ready and suffering a miscarriage, which was one of the toughest experiences in my life,” she wrote.
"God knew my heart, and I feel blessed to have another opportunity to be a Mommi. This gift is for all of us… but I'm most excited to make Deucey a big brother. He prays for his sister/brother every night. My heart and belly are so full. Thanks for all the love today. Ross party of 4 loading….. I'm taking you all on the journey, so hang on for the ride!"
Uzo Aduba
Next on the list is actress Uzo Aduba. In June, the Orange is the New Black star revealed that she and her husband of almost three years, director Robert Sweeting were expecting their first child together in an Instagram post that featured a video and a touching caption.
In the clip, Aduba is holding up a miniature onesie and saying "tada" as the camera pans to her face. In addition to the video, the 42-year-old disclosed how happy the pair were to "enter this new chapter."
"What a blessing," she said. "My husband Robert and I are so happy to enter this next chapter together as parents. I am beyond excited. I get to be someone's Mommy! I know as the three of us continue to grow, our only, ONLY goal will be to love you, little one. My goodness. Look what God has done."
Chanel Iman
Model and actress Chanel Iman and her fiancé NFL star Davon Godchaux announced that their blended family of five was expanding in May by sharing intimate moments from the couple's photoshoot on Instagram, which included the star's growing belly.
Alongside the images, the 32-year-old wrote the caption, "Our family is growing, and we are so excited to meet our new little one." Weeks following the announcement, the pair shared during their gender reveal that they were expecting a baby girl.
This latest addition will be Iman's third daughter while Godchaux's first—the Dope star shares two daughters, Cali and Cassie Shepard, with her ex-husband Sterling Shepard. At the same time, Godchaux has a son from a previous relationship.
Serena Williams
Tennis legend Serena Williams and her husband, Reddit founder Alexis Ohanian, stole the show during the 2023 Met Gala in May after the couple arrived with the 41-year-old’s baby bump on display.
In addition to Williams' red carpet appearance, the star confirmed the news on her Instagram page by including other images from the night.
"Was so excited when Anna Wintour invited the 3 of us to the Met Gala," she said.
Months later, Williams and Ohanian shared at their gender reveal party that they are expecting a second daughter. The couple shares a 5-year-old daughter Alexis Ohanian Jr.
Da Brat
Rapper and reality television star Da Brat announced that she and her wife, Jessica Harris-Dupart, were expecting their first child together in February during an interview with People Magazine.
Prior to Da Brat's pregnancy, which occurred with an anonymous sperm donor that the couple selected, she had a miscarriage. At the same time, Harris-Dupart, who has three children from a previous relationship, experienced health complications, including blood clots during an "egg retrieval procedure" for the in vitro fertilization process.
According to Cleveland Clinic, the purpose of the egg retrieval procedure is to manually combine them with the sperm and place the fertilized egg in the embryo in hopes it "implants itself into the uterine wall" so that a pregnancy can occur.
On July 6, Da Brat and the Kaleidoscope Hair Care CEO would become the proud parents of a healthy baby boy named True Legend Harris-Dupart.
Rihanna
The sixth person on the list is singer and mogul Rihanna.
The 35-year-old, who shares a one-year-old son Rza Mayers with longtime boyfriend Rakim "A$AP Rocky" Mayers, stunned the world during her highly-anticipated Super Bowl performance in February, where she flaunted her growing belly in a red jumpsuit and sang a melody of her hits.
Since the jaw-dropping announcement, Rihanna has showcased her baby bump in various appearances and modeling projects.
Naomi Osaka
Tennis star Naomi Osaka revealed that she and her boyfriend, rapper Cordae Dunston were expecting their first child at the top of the year after taking a break from the sport.
The 25-year-old shared the news on various social media platforms, including Instagram and Twitter, alongside a photo of her ultrasound. In addition to her official statement, which listed her pregnancy as one reason for her tennis absence, Osaka shared how excited she was to become a mother.
"The past few years have been interesting, to say the least, but I find that it's the most challenging times in life that may be the most fun. These few months away from the sport has really given me a new love and appreciation for the game l've dedicated my life to. I realize that life is so short and I don't take any moments for granted, everyday is a new blessing and adventure," she wrote.
"I know that I have so much to look forward to in the future, one thing l'm looking forward to is for my kid to watch one of my matches and tell someone, 'that's my mom' haha. 2023 will be a year that'll be full of lessons for me and I hope I'll see you guys in the start of the next one cause l'll be at Aus 2024. Love you all infinitely."
Fast forward to July 11, Osaka and Dunston welcomed a baby girl.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image by Rob Kim/Getty Images