

Living through a pandemic has many of us wondering how to find remote jobs, and since everyone seems to be working from home (or are now privy to the wonderful world of flex hours), the allure of the seemingly countless remote work opportunities is definitely there. I mean, you can't go online without seeing some pop-up ad, YouTube video, or social media webinar touting the freedom, demand, success and "can't miss" dream of remote work.
Well, with anything that seems to be in-demand and full of fantasy, there are always red flags. The scamming is real, and even in the world of regular recruitment, you've got to be careful. Here are a few red flags to look out for so that your desire to pursue remote work doesn't lead you to new and avoidable problems:
1. The salary listed is too good to be true.
This one is a doozy because we could all use a few more coins. Here's the thing: The company could offer you that salary but never pay you for the work. Why? Because it was a farce in the first place. Or worse: The job never existed, the "recruiter" actually doesn't even work for the company, or the listing was fake. Scammers will use tactics like offering a high salary that is not even commiserate with the industry nor does it match with what you've researched online. According to reports, job scams have increased during the pandemic, and this is a major tell-tale sign that you're dealing with a counterfeit professional or fraudster.
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2. They ask you for an upfront payment or "investment."
When you're unemployed (or even when you're not), you definitely don't have money to waste, and there are so many free resources out here for finding work. No reputable company will ask for an upfront payment to interview you or to give you access to more information about the job. Also, no company will need your debit or credit card information in order to vet you for a position. Sis, don't even question this. It's a scam. Period. Case closed. (If you need even more information about this or you want to find out if you've been a victim—and what you should do—check out the Federal Trade Commission's website or consult a local legal professional, several of which offer free consultations.
(Now, hiring a career coach, headhunter, recruitment consultant, or leadership coach is a different story. In this case, you're paying for actual services and time, but you still need to vet these professionals as well.)
3. The company's online presence is a tad sus, at best.
No matter the industry or type of work: If the company's website has not been updated and the information on their site is old or sparse, raise more than an eyebrow. (You can check these things by looking at the year listed at the bottom of the home page of most reputable businesses' Websites.)
Furthermore, if the company or brand doesn't have a presence on LinkedIn, writes you from an email address that includes misspellings or is mostly used for personal correspondences, or if you can't verify its financials, team members, or management via several online sources that you trust, sis, walk away.
Most companies have social media accounts and Websites that are actively updated, and company information is usually readily available on the Web, whether it's on their own site or via Forbes, Inc., the Better Business Bureau or local news outlets. Use sites like Yelp, Glassdoor, and Indeed to read reviews about the company or brand, check online for applicable licenses or certifications or visit the attorney general's site for where the company is based. It's also a good idea to Google the names of the people emailing you about the position and see if they have their own LinkedIn, Twitter, or Instagram accounts. If they don't, again, that's a red flag.
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4. Their payment process is sketchy.
As a remote worker, you should have a clear understanding of how you'll be paid, via what platform or means, how often, and how your taxes will be handled. You should also be able to get this in information in writing, and feel comfortable offering information required for payroll or tax purposes (such as your address or social security number.) If you ask questions on this and feel like you're pulling teeth to get answers, chuck the dueces. Also, if you're given vague insights in reference to pay or you just don't feel comfortable with the payment method or process, you might want to just reconsider working for the company or brand altogether.
At reputable companies, many remote workers are paid through the same processes as regular, in-office workers, so keep that in mind. If they don't have an in-house HR and payroll team, they'll typically contract with companies like ADP or offer to pay via platforms like PayPal. Also, I love a company that is super-responsive, especially when it comes to payment issues or questions, so having a direct phone number for talking to a live human or at least a chat option where you can get real-time responses is a good look.
Might I add, as a freelancer, this doesn't just apply to major corporations or brands. It's also in reference to small business owners or solopreneurs who contract you for work. That still counts as remote work, and when you depend on this to pay your bills—and your taxes—you'll want to be sure you're not setting yourself up for nonsense and drama.
5. They are asking for personal information—like a social security number—up front.
Again, fraud, fraud, and more fraud. This information is typically not required until after a job offer is made, according to experts, and that makes perfect sense considering that the social is often needed solely for payroll purposes or background checks. Some companies ask for a social during the application process, but I'd side-eye considering the privacy and ethics issues. (Also, it's a practice that is highly discouraged.)
Vet companies and get to know who you're corresponding with before you give out your personal information, especially your social security number. In some states, asking for the social before an offer is made is a big no-no and could put a company in a position to face fines or legal action, so be sure you're aware of the the statutes and best practices.
Before offering this information—and only after you've gotten that congrats email—ask about the companies' cybersecurity policies as well as their privacy efforts in storing your information. Ask them how the information will be used, and get details of this in writing. And even if you get pretty comfortable with the interviewer or recruiter, verify if it's even necessary to give out that information. Some contract workers who are self-employed, for example, use EIN numbers.
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6. You have no idea who handles HR or tech issues.
As a remote worker, you can sometimes feel super-displaced, almost like a distant cousin or step-child who is part of the family but not necessarily acknowledged and almost always forgotten when it's time to send out those family reunion invites. Having an HR professional to address questions or troubleshoot any problems that might arise with management, work hours, pay, expectations, or grievances is always a good sign that the company values all its workers—not just those who come into an actual office every day.
Companies that don't have at least one neutral party you can talk to about the usual everyday work-related issues you're confronted with that actually affect your work can create cultures that facilitate toxic, unfulfilled experiences. When there is no unbiased, professional party to turn to for recourse in resolving challenges or addressing unprofessional behaviors, the situation can turn into the remote job from hell. It's good to take note of who handles these issues or ask questions related to human resources before moving forward.
And when it comes to tech, companies that actually have a dedicated team, hotline, or person to handle IT issues are great to work for, especially since many remote jobs require use of a laptop or computer and some sort of Internet connection. Who wants to have to worry about not being able to get their work done because they can't get in contact with an actual tech professional to find out why their email isn't working or why they're locked out of certain platforms? Again, it'll be the flex job from hell. Run.
7. You are required to use your own equipment or buy equipment to do your job.
Unless you're a freelancer or small business owner by trade and you're able to write off your equipment as a business or work expense, don't accommodate requests to go out spending your own money for a job. Once your home computer breaks down, gets a virus from something you were required to download, or is overwhelmed by constant file-sharing and video calls, you're left holding the bag while the company doesn't have to invest a penny in providing proper equipment or compensating you for your losses.
If there are special tech accessories, hardware, or software requirements, reputable companies will provide without question. I know plenty of people whose jobs suddenly went remote and their companies provided headsets, computers, keyboards, phones, and other items needed to make the transition seamless. I've also worked for companies that have provided a laptop, phone, and reimbursements or discounts for expenses related to remote work. It was part of the offer package and I would never ask for anything less.
8. The job duties are vague, even after you've asked specific questions about them.
To start, it's a good practice to ask about the everyday tasks, the success metrics, the communication requirements, and the work hours. I mean, the title might sound good, but if you don't know what you'll actually be required to do and how you can't really thrive. When employers want quality candidates, they'll be super-clear on the qualifications, the daily duties, and how a candidate's performance will be reviewed. If they're being mum or you're still confused after corresponding with a prospective employer, just say no. You want to avoid being catfished at all costs.
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9. You can't pinpoint who your manager is or who will be evaluating your performance.
Again, this goes back to quality of experience and thriving in your career journey. You'd hate to be in a remote job experience where you've got one too many bosses to answer to (with nonstop, conflicting emails or Slack messages from each), or you have no clue as to how good or awful you're doing at a job. In a remote situation, this can be both devastating and mentally draining. You should be able to inquire about who your direct manager will be, how they communicate, and what their specific expectations are for the position. This will also give you the information you need to research your potential manager by looking up their social profiles or reading reviews of their leadership on job search sites.
10. It's remote... until it's not.
Yep, some companies will pull the ol' bait-and-switch with you where they initially advertised the position as remote but during the interview slide in a mention of the possibility that "once everything gets back to normal" you will be "asked" to come into the office. There are also those recruiters and managers who will use very blurry language when asked whether the position you're interviewing for will remain remote. It's the "For now, we all work remote, but we have offices in..." for me.
If you enjoy working remote, still don't feel comfortable working in an office, have a health issue, or want to continue having the flexibility to home-school your children or to travel, this is definitely a red flag to consider. In weeding out these sorts of fuzzy and potentially problematic employers, I just ask about the remote aspect of the job three times in at least three different ways, and I will even politely require the remote guarantee in writing before accepting an offer. When asked if you'd be OK with coming into an office, be honest and either go the direct route by simply saying, "No," or tell them why you prefer remote work.
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Devale Ellis On Being A Provider, Marriage Growth & Redefining Fatherhood
In this candid episode of the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker talked with Devale Ellis, actor, social media personality, and star of Zatima, about modern masculinity, learning to be a better husband, emotional presence in marriage, fatherhood for Black men, and leading by example.
“I Wasn’t Present Emotionally”: Devale Ellis on Marriage Growth
Devale Ellis On Learning He Was a ‘Bad Husband’
Ellis grew up believing that a man should prioritize providing for his family. “I know this may come off as misogynistic, but I feel like it’s my responsibility as a man to pay for everything,” he said, emphasizing the wise guidance passed down by his father. However, five years into his marriage to long-time partner Khadeen Ellis, he realized provision wasn’t just financial.
“I was a bad husband because I wasn’t present emotionally… I wasn’t concerned about what she needed outside of the resources.”
Once he shifted his mindset, his marriage improved. “In me trying to be of service to her, I learned that me being of service created a woman who is now willing to be of service to me.”
On Redefining Masculinity and Fatherhood
For Ellis, “being a man is about being consistent.” As a father of four, he sees parenthood as a chance to reshape the future.
“Children give you another chance at life. I have four different opportunities right now to do my life all over again.”
He also works to uplift young Black men, reinforcing their worth in a world that often undermines them. His values extend to his career—Ellis refuses to play roles that involve domestic violence or sexual assault.
Watch the full episode below:
On Marriage, Family Planning, and Writing His Story
After his wife’s postpartum preeclampsia, Ellis chose a vasectomy over her taking hormonal birth control, further proving his commitment to their partnership. He and Khadeen share their journey in We Over Me, and his next book, Raising Kings: How Fatherhood Saved Me From Myself, is on the way.
Through honesty and growth, Devale Ellis challenges traditional ideas of masculinity, making his story one that resonates deeply with millennial women.
For the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker peels back the layers of masculinity with candid conversations that challenge stereotypes and celebrate vulnerability. Real men. Real stories. Real talk.
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
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6 Tabletop Sex Positions That'll Unlock You & Bae's Most Primal Desires
Something I will never tire of is finding new ways to bring new layers to intimacy. A wall you use as momentum, a bathroom sink to help you keep your balance as he worships you on his knees, a shower that is usually for cleansing but evolves into a sacred ritual of shared intimacy.
My favorite kind of sex is the kind of sex that prioritizes pleasure and connection. So, technically and thankfully, I can say most of my sex life has been quite pleasurable throughout the years. But the memorable encounters for sure take the cake. One such encounter actually took place on a kitchen counter, and with it unleashed inhibitions in ways I never anticipated while unlocking levels to top-tier sex. And that, that involved a kitchen counter.
Why Kitchen Counter Sex Just Hits Different
What is it about having your hips pressed into the edge of a kitchen counter that lets out something so primal in you? The cool-to-the-touch feel of the countertop against exposed skin as you rise to meet him again and again. The urgency in every movement. The playfulness of repurposing an everyday space for something far more erotic. If you’re looking to bring that energy into your own sex life, keep reading for positions and tips to explore.
1. The Bounce House
They don’t call it Bounce House for nothing. In this position, the penetrating partner lies flat on their back on a sturdy table or counter while the receiving partner straddles them, knees bent and facing away. With their hands gripping the edge of the surface for support, the receiving partner slides or bounces at their own pace, owning the rhythm, the motion, and the view.
According to sex therapist Michael Aaron, Ph.D., who spoke with Women’s Health, the receiving partner placing their legs between their partner’s creates a tighter sensation, while staying fully astride allows for more bounce and range of motion. Either way, this one puts the receiver in full control, and you know we love a good woman on top position. Pleasure and power? Say less.
2. The Bicycle
Well, you know what they say about riding a bike. In the case of this table top position, it's the receiving partner who is the rider...but not in the way you think. While lying back on a sturdy surface or a table, the receiver will bring their knees toward their chest, bending them as if in a cycling motion. The penetrating partner stands at the edge of the surface, grabbing the receiver's ankles, and guides themselves inside, slowly so as to savor the moment. This angle puts everything on display for the penetrating partner while allowing for deep, connected thrusting for the receiver.
To take things up a notch , the receiving partner can touch themselves or flex their thighs to control the depth or the rhythm. Because, who says only one person gets to have control?
3. Counter Offer
How could we be at the table and not use it to eat? Enter: Counter Offer. In this oral-focused sex position, the receiving partner perches on the edge of a counter or table, lying back or sitting upright with legs parted or bent for comfort. The penetrating partner kneels or stands between their thighs, depending on the setup and the kind of attention they’re ready to give. No doubt, this one’s all about access and intention.
With the vulva front and center, the height makes it easier to maintain eye contact, use hands freely for things like breast play or incorporating toys, and take their time with every moan-inducing taste. And that’s on five, six, seven, ATE.
4. Standing Doggy
Standing Doggy is what happens when a classic like doggy style gets an upgrade. Instead of being on all fours on a bed, the receiving partner bends over a hard surface like a table or counter, keeping their hips aligned at its edge. The penetrating partner stands behind and enters from the back, using the angle to go deeper and create a strong, steady rhythm. This one offers maximum control and visual appeal, especially if the penetrating partner reaches around for a little extra clitoral stimulation throughout thrusting.
This angle can get intense quickly, so bonus points if the receiving partner engages their pelvic floor muscles or shifts their weight to adjust how the pressure hits, especially if your goal is to hit that G-spot sweet spot.
5. Top Shelf
Men's Healthcalls this one "Yourself on the Shelf," but we like to call it "Top Shelf" because it's giving full view, full grip, and climax potential that's hard to top. The receiving partner sits on the edge of a sturdy table or counter while the penetrating partner stands in front of them and slowly slides in, thrusting while keeping them in position. From there, legs can wrap around their waist, arms can encircle their back, and the closeness at peak ecstasy? Chef's kiss.
If you have the core strength, add lifting to the menu for the final strokes leading to orgasm. Otherwise, allow the surface to the heavy lifting and enjoy the pleasure.
6. The Thumper
What better way to remind yourself that you're both the snack and the entrée than with a little tableside service courtesy of The Thumper? This position has the receiving partner kneeling on a sturdy table or counter (keyword: sturdy), hands gripping the edge or braced in front for support. The penetrating partner can then either kneel behind them (if there's room for two), or stay anchored on the ground with both feet planted on the floor (similar to the previously mentioned Standing Doggy). It all depends on the mood.
Kneeling on the table offers just the right amount of leverage for deep, steady strokes. The receiving partner can play with tightness by either keeping their knees closer together for a snug grip, or open their knees wider to invite more access, depth, and stretch. The Thumper is versatile that way, and the most important thing? The receiver gets to be the main course. Yum.
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