

When it comes to a job search, we're definitely Team Work Smart Not Hard. And any way you can automate certain aspects of your job search can be beneficial. Not only does it save you time and stress, but it can also lead to better results, especially those related to job post outreach.
We've all seen and read insights about AI and how you can use this to communicate and write better, and cold-emailing is one way you can incorporate AI in order to do so. Here's all you need to know about this and the scripts you can try out in order to land the job you want:
What Is Cold Emailing?
A cold email is something sent to someone you do not know or have no previous real-life connection with. It was traditionally used in sales and business to sell a product or spark interest in a product or service, but today, job seekers can use it to find out about new job opportunities, connect with recruiters, managers, or potential employers, or find out more information about an open role.
The method can be a hit or miss, since sometimes, cold emails end up in spam or trash, especially when the recipient receives hundreds of emails a month and barely knows you. But in some instances, it can lead to big results, like the time this entrepreneur landed an initial $250,000 in startup funds simply by sending a cold email to a potential investor.
Combined with networking and finding ways to interact with a person that’s not necessarily one-on-one but relevant, cold-emailing could be your ticket to getting at least a toe in the door when you want to apply for a certain job at a particular company, or you want to break into a new industry.
Where To Start With Cold Emailing
1. Humble Yourself.
I actually got my gig at xoNecole via cold email. I had a lot of experience at the time working in mostly newsy journalism, and I saw that xoNecole was taking submissions. Interestingly enough, I'd become familiar with the founder—through a personal online blog she had at the time—years before she'd launched this site. While we both worked in media and entertainment, we did not know one another personally, nor had I ever met or networked with her. It was a bit serendipitous that I'd end up cold-emailing to write for xoNecole.
In that moment, I had to humble myself. Though I'd worked for major publishers and had done a bit of featured writing, I was most known for formal, business-toned Associated Press-style stories, and this site's style was more down-to-earth, conversational, and free-flowing. I sent the email, thinking, "What's the worst that can happen? A rejection? No response?"
Well, five years later, here I am, an associate editor, after starting out as a contributor. I simply shot my shot to the appropriate email address, following the appropriate process detailed on the website, and then once I got a few stories published, I asked if they had any need for editing services.
2. Do Your Research.
As I stated before, I read their website to find out how I could pitch myself and the correct email address to contact for that purpose. You'll have to do the same. Do a bit of online digging and find out, first, if there is a formal process to apply for what you need or to get the information you're looking for.
Sometimes, cold emails end up in the trash because they simply went to the wrong person or the sender did not follow simple directions that are part of an already-established process. For example, if the company's website clearly states that you should contact the HR department at a set email address, it might not be wise to first send a cold email to your potential direct manager. Or, if the company requires a certain format for requests or a word count limit for emails, you might want to know that before sending your 1,000-word synopsis of why you'd be great for a job.
Another big no-no is sending an email to someone who has nothing to do with your end result. This is a common and easy mistake to make.
If your inquiry is about an IT role but you're sending it to the marketing department, again, it's easy to simply disregard it. Professionals have limited time, and some can barely manage emails from people they know, so make it harder for them to ignore you by finding out exactly who you need to be contacting.
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3. Be sure the subject line is concise, relevant, and punchy.
Put yourself in the shoes of the stranger you're emailing. Let's say you want the marketing director position that you saw listed on LinkedIn. Well, think about the first thing they'll see when they open their inbox. What would get their attention? What keywords can you use so that they can bookmark and come back to your email if needed? How can you clearly but quickly note why they should open the email in 7 words or less?
As an editor who manages hundreds of pieces of content, dozens of contributors, and gets countless pitches from people I don't know (and probably will never meet), the subject line can make or break whether I actually even read the email; great pitch or not.
Here are a few great subject lines to tweak and make your own. (And sis, please do not just copy and paste these. Customize with your own voice and savvy):
- Re: Job Title: - Your Name, Current Title (You don't have to list the company here)
- Re: Job Posting Number: Job Title, Your Name
- Re: Job Post Inquiry - Your Name
- Job Title Seeking New Opportunity
Here are a few creative subject lines that might be winners if you have a gift of gab. Be sure they're not too salesy, ingenuine, or cheesy, considering the type of job and the industry you're in:
- [Current Job Title + Current Company] – I'd Love To Work With You
- Job Applicant Referred By [name of referral] for Job Title at Company (Make sure this is true.)
- Here's Why [Your Name] Would Be The Best [Job Title] For Your Company (This is headline-style writing. Take a cue from news stories and commercials and get creative with this one. Again, make sure the tone is appropriate and you have an actual knack for this.)
- 10 Things You Didn't Know About [Your Name], [Job Title that references skill needed for the role that you can actually do] (This is another headline-style subject line. Again, only use this one if you're savvy and it's appropriate.)
- Make a great decision before your 2nd cup of coffee. Hire me (give reason)
- Award-winning [Current Job Title] looking for new opportunities
- [Your Name] – the best addition to your team
You can also use ChatGPT for this. Simply use an online platform or an app, type in a prompt or other context around what you want to communicate, and allow AI to do the work. Again, you'll still need to customize this for your own voice and tone, and be sure to proofread it as well.
Tech should complement human intelligence and skill, not replace it, and trust me; people will know when something has been pre-written or scripted and is not authentically you.
What To Include In A Cold Email
There are several key approaches, but they all have a few things in common. First, you want to be sure to get to the point early in your email (i.e., in the first or second sentence), introducing yourself, your skills, and what you need (i.e., applying for the job, requesting a 5-minute virtual meeting, more information about the role, etc).
Be direct and lean heavily into using specific keywords (those major terms about the job, company, or industry that were included in the job post or company's website). Master saying more with fewer words. Address the person by name, but if you don't know it, start with a general "Good morning," or "Good day."
Second, the email should be no more than two to three short paragraphs (maybe four to six sentences each). If they want more information, they will ask for it in a follow-up email. Give them just enough to intrigue or spark interest and make sure, again, that the information is super-relevant to your end goal and in consideration of their time. Here's a good starting point for your opening paragraph:
Good Day,
I am [name], an award-winning [title] who has a passion for [thing one, thing two, and thing three], which is why I'd be a great fit for the [job opening/position]. I have worked in [industry] doing [specific value add 1, value add 2, value add 3] for [time period], and I want to bring those skills to your company.
Reference something you read about the company or that person that inspired you to want to work there or mention a problem that you'd like to have a hand in solving. Try this:
I recently read this article where you spoke about [3-4 words describing what was intriguing] and thought this is a leader I'd love the chance to work with.
I've been following the news of your company's public offering and would like to be part of its new strategy to [fill in the blanks here].
I met you at the Leaders of Tomorrow gala, and you follow a cause that's dear to my heart as well: youth leadership and mentorship.
Long emails about your experience, why you're the best at the job, etc., might get it tossed. People often graze emails and skim because, again, time is limited.
Third, add in key, short bullet points elaborating on your relevant experience, interests, links to your work, or other applicable aspects of your talent and experience that make you competitive in your industry. If you've recently led a campaign, send a link to the actual visual outcome. If you have a professional website, include the link to that. If you've earned awards, mention them.
Again, keep the bullet points short and sweet. Stay away from vague words like "worked on" versus "led the team," or "helped advance," versus "oversaw a $1 million growth in sales." For example:
This year, I:
- Led strategic teams for a 30% increase in sales year over year
- Landed a spot on the "Top 30 Under 30 In Sales" To Watch" list for the National Association of Sales Professionals
- Completed three [list certifications or other educational background insights that were recently upgraded or obtained.)
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And don't forget to list your full name, email address, and the best way to contact you at the bottom of the page. You can attach your resume as well, but be sure this is part of their formal process. Sometimes, your LinkedIn information can suffice, and you won't be sending them large file attachments (which some people really don't like.)
Once you're done with the email, create a template so that you can simply plug the copy in when you're sending multiple emails to different people. (You can also simply save the copy as a Word or Google document and copy and paste when needed.) Avoid bcc'ing or blinding sending mass emails. It's not a good look, and you can easily embarrass yourself by referencing the wrong person, job, or company.
Be strategic by sitting down and listing companies, key people, and your "why" for each. This way, you can narrow things down so that you're not wildly overextending yourself in the process. Set a time/date for doing this, and pace yourself.
Cold-emailing should be part of a larger strategy that includes actual networking, volunteering, socializing, researching, enhancing your skills, and doing quality work in the meantime. Remember, this is simply something to add to your arsenal to put you that much closer to getting the gig.
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Devale Ellis On Being A Provider, Marriage Growth & Redefining Fatherhood
In this candid episode of the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker talked with Devale Ellis, actor, social media personality, and star of Zatima, about modern masculinity, learning to be a better husband, emotional presence in marriage, fatherhood for Black men, and leading by example.
“I Wasn’t Present Emotionally”: Devale Ellis on Marriage Growth
Devale Ellis On Learning He Was a ‘Bad Husband’
Ellis grew up believing that a man should prioritize providing for his family. “I know this may come off as misogynistic, but I feel like it’s my responsibility as a man to pay for everything,” he said, emphasizing the wise guidance passed down by his father. However, five years into his marriage to long-time partner Khadeen Ellis, he realized provision wasn’t just financial.
“I was a bad husband because I wasn’t present emotionally… I wasn’t concerned about what she needed outside of the resources.”
Once he shifted his mindset, his marriage improved. “In me trying to be of service to her, I learned that me being of service created a woman who is now willing to be of service to me.”
On Redefining Masculinity and Fatherhood
For Ellis, “being a man is about being consistent.” As a father of four, he sees parenthood as a chance to reshape the future.
“Children give you another chance at life. I have four different opportunities right now to do my life all over again.”
He also works to uplift young Black men, reinforcing their worth in a world that often undermines them. His values extend to his career—Ellis refuses to play roles that involve domestic violence or sexual assault.
Watch the full episode below:
On Marriage, Family Planning, and Writing His Story
After his wife’s postpartum preeclampsia, Ellis chose a vasectomy over her taking hormonal birth control, further proving his commitment to their partnership. He and Khadeen share their journey in We Over Me, and his next book, Raising Kings: How Fatherhood Saved Me From Myself, is on the way.
Through honesty and growth, Devale Ellis challenges traditional ideas of masculinity, making his story one that resonates deeply with millennial women.
For the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker peels back the layers of masculinity with candid conversations that challenge stereotypes and celebrate vulnerability. Real men. Real stories. Real talk.
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by YouTube/xoNecole
6 Tabletop Sex Positions That'll Unlock You & Bae's Most Primal Desires
Something I will never tire of is finding new ways to bring new layers to intimacy. A wall you use as momentum, a bathroom sink to help you keep your balance as he worships you on his knees, a shower that is usually for cleansing but evolves into a sacred ritual of shared intimacy.
My favorite kind of sex is the kind of sex that prioritizes pleasure and connection. So, technically and thankfully, I can say most of my sex life has been quite pleasurable throughout the years. But the memorable encounters for sure take the cake. One such encounter actually took place on a kitchen counter, and with it unleashed inhibitions in ways I never anticipated while unlocking levels to top-tier sex. And that, that involved a kitchen counter.
Why Kitchen Counter Sex Just Hits Different
What is it about having your hips pressed into the edge of a kitchen counter that lets out something so primal in you? The cool-to-the-touch feel of the countertop against exposed skin as you rise to meet him again and again. The urgency in every movement. The playfulness of repurposing an everyday space for something far more erotic. If you’re looking to bring that energy into your own sex life, keep reading for positions and tips to explore.
1. The Bounce House
They don’t call it Bounce House for nothing. In this position, the penetrating partner lies flat on their back on a sturdy table or counter while the receiving partner straddles them, knees bent and facing away. With their hands gripping the edge of the surface for support, the receiving partner slides or bounces at their own pace, owning the rhythm, the motion, and the view.
According to sex therapist Michael Aaron, Ph.D., who spoke with Women’s Health, the receiving partner placing their legs between their partner’s creates a tighter sensation, while staying fully astride allows for more bounce and range of motion. Either way, this one puts the receiver in full control, and you know we love a good woman on top position. Pleasure and power? Say less.
2. The Bicycle
Well, you know what they say about riding a bike. In the case of this table top position, it's the receiving partner who is the rider...but not in the way you think. While lying back on a sturdy surface or a table, the receiver will bring their knees toward their chest, bending them as if in a cycling motion. The penetrating partner stands at the edge of the surface, grabbing the receiver's ankles, and guides themselves inside, slowly so as to savor the moment. This angle puts everything on display for the penetrating partner while allowing for deep, connected thrusting for the receiver.
To take things up a notch , the receiving partner can touch themselves or flex their thighs to control the depth or the rhythm. Because, who says only one person gets to have control?
3. Counter Offer
How could we be at the table and not use it to eat? Enter: Counter Offer. In this oral-focused sex position, the receiving partner perches on the edge of a counter or table, lying back or sitting upright with legs parted or bent for comfort. The penetrating partner kneels or stands between their thighs, depending on the setup and the kind of attention they’re ready to give. No doubt, this one’s all about access and intention.
With the vulva front and center, the height makes it easier to maintain eye contact, use hands freely for things like breast play or incorporating toys, and take their time with every moan-inducing taste. And that’s on five, six, seven, ATE.
4. Standing Doggy
Standing Doggy is what happens when a classic like doggy style gets an upgrade. Instead of being on all fours on a bed, the receiving partner bends over a hard surface like a table or counter, keeping their hips aligned at its edge. The penetrating partner stands behind and enters from the back, using the angle to go deeper and create a strong, steady rhythm. This one offers maximum control and visual appeal, especially if the penetrating partner reaches around for a little extra clitoral stimulation throughout thrusting.
This angle can get intense quickly, so bonus points if the receiving partner engages their pelvic floor muscles or shifts their weight to adjust how the pressure hits, especially if your goal is to hit that G-spot sweet spot.
5. Top Shelf
Men's Healthcalls this one "Yourself on the Shelf," but we like to call it "Top Shelf" because it's giving full view, full grip, and climax potential that's hard to top. The receiving partner sits on the edge of a sturdy table or counter while the penetrating partner stands in front of them and slowly slides in, thrusting while keeping them in position. From there, legs can wrap around their waist, arms can encircle their back, and the closeness at peak ecstasy? Chef's kiss.
If you have the core strength, add lifting to the menu for the final strokes leading to orgasm. Otherwise, allow the surface to the heavy lifting and enjoy the pleasure.
6. The Thumper
What better way to remind yourself that you're both the snack and the entrée than with a little tableside service courtesy of The Thumper? This position has the receiving partner kneeling on a sturdy table or counter (keyword: sturdy), hands gripping the edge or braced in front for support. The penetrating partner can then either kneel behind them (if there's room for two), or stay anchored on the ground with both feet planted on the floor (similar to the previously mentioned Standing Doggy). It all depends on the mood.
Kneeling on the table offers just the right amount of leverage for deep, steady strokes. The receiving partner can play with tightness by either keeping their knees closer together for a snug grip, or open their knees wider to invite more access, depth, and stretch. The Thumper is versatile that way, and the most important thing? The receiver gets to be the main course. Yum.
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