10 Things Your Scalp Has BEEN Waiting For You To Do
If someone were to ask me about the part of my body that I have neglected the most over the years, I would probably have to say that it was my scalp. Hell, with the amount of permanent hair dyeing and texturizing that I used to do once upon a time, that would be enough “scalp abuse” to prove my point.
I know this to be the case because once I stopped applying harsh chemicals to my hair (which includes my scalp), I went through about a year-and-a-half of scalp flaking that was totally out of control. A hairstylist told me it was my scalp actually recovering from all of the trauma that I had sent it through. Then, when I started scalp detoxing (check out “Treat Your Scalp To A Little Bit Of Detoxing This Weekend”) — that’s when I knew that I had to get better about taking care of the foundation of my hair: my scalp.
If that’s something that you’d like to get better at doing as well, I will share with you some of the things that I’ve been intentional about doing that have done a world of good as far as scalp maintenance is concerned. If you do these things consistently, whether you deal with dry scalp, dandruff or you simply want to see your hair thrive more, I can almost guarantee that you will see a noticeable improvement in a matter of a couple of months.
1. Eat More Antioxidants
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Whenever you hear someone talk about the importance of having antioxidants in your system, it’s probably in the context of relying on them to boost your immune system. However, there are several reasons why they’re also really good for your scalp and hair as well. Antioxidants help to fight off free radicals, boost blood circulation to your scalp, protect your hair and scalp from UV damage, reduce hair shedding, promote healthy hair growth, and even make your hair appear fuller.
Foods that are full of antioxidants include citrus fruit, berries, spinach, broccoli, carrots, kale, cabbage, sweet potatoes, onions, and cinnamon…so, the next time you’re at the grocery store, do your scalp a solid and pick up a few of ‘em.
2. Up Your Vitamin B12 Intake
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As I’ve gotten older, something that I’ve been intentional about doing is taking a vitamin B12 supplement. Holistically, it’s a nutrient that’s beneficial because it helps to preserve the health of blood and nerve cells. Also, vitamin B12 is good for you because it can reduce depression-related symptoms and give you more energy.
Your scalp and hair will enjoy you getting more B12 into your body because there is a direct connection between having a vitamin B12 deficiency and experiencing hair loss. Since it also has been known to soothe eczema-related symptoms (and scalp eczema is indeed a thing; it’s usually called seborrhoeic dermatitis) — that’s all the more reason to take a supplement yourself and/or eat more B12-enriched foods like eggs, salmon, yogurt, turkey and mushrooms.
3. Try All-Natural Shampoo Bars
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Something that I’ve been shampooing my hair with, for a few years now, is shampoo bars. They tend to have more natural ingredients in them. They are gentler on my hair. They last longer than the kind of shampoo that comes in a bottle. They take up less space. They also seem to keep more moisture in my hair, which is always a major perk. And since so many of them do not have the same kind of harsh ingredients that many commercial brand shampoos have, this means that your scalp doesn’t have to stress out on wash day.
If you’ve never gone this cleansing route, my two cents would be to do some online window shopping on Etsy. If you go to the site and put “Black-owned shampoo bars” in the search field, you’ll be amazed by how many all-natural ones you will have to choose from.
4. Do an Herbal Scalp Rinse
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If you’re looking for a quick and inexpensive way to pamper your scalp and hair, how about an herbal rinse? It’s probably the most effective way to get the herbs that come from teas into your hair. For instance, nettle tea is great for treating hair breakage, ginseng tea strengthens hair, green tea stimulates hair growth, gooseberry tea fights off free radicals, and lavender tea is great at promoting a healthy scalp. Based on whatever your scalp and hair needs at the time, you can apply one tea or create a combination.
My advice would be to get some loose-leaf teas, steep them for like 30 minutes, allow them to cool and sit for a couple of days in mason jars (don’t pour the tea into the jars until after the tea has become lukewarm in temperature) and then rinse your hair with it after shampooing and conditioning it. Let the mixture sit on your hair for 10 minutes, and rinse with cool water. You can find some more info on herbal rinses here. Etsy is also a place where you can find just about any loose-leaf herb that you can think of. Again, go to the site, put “loose-leaf herbs” in the search field, and be prepared for your mind to be blown.
5. Wash with Lukewarm or Cool Water Only
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Very few things feel better than hot water running from the scalp to the feet while taking a shower. Problem is, hot water can be very drying to your skin, and your scalp is no exception — and a dehydrated scalp can cause all types of issues in the long run. That’s why it really is best to wash your scalp and hair in lukewarm water and then rinse it in cool or cold water. Cooler temperatures will keep the natural sebum that’s on your scalp in balance, add moisture, reduce dandruff, increase blood circulation, and add shine to your hair strands from your roots to your ends.
6. Make a DIY Tea Tree Oil Serum
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If dandruff is something that you struggle with or you simply have moments when your scalp is itchy, and it’s irritating the entire crap outta you, try some tea tree oil. Its super potent antibacterial, anti-inflammatory, antiviral, and antifungal properties make it great for treating acne and dermatitis, and it is a powerful ingredient in all-natural deodorant and mouthwash, too. Because tea tree oil is so good at treating fungal issues, that’s why it can reduce dandruff irritation and flaking.
What I personally like so much about it is that, even though this oil will help to get rid of inflammation, itching, and fungus-related drama, it doesn’t dry out my scalp in the process. In fact, it actually helps to moisturize it; just make sure that you add a carrier oil to it because, again, it’s potent and nothing to play with.
7. Create a Scalp Scrub Too
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Okay. Sit and think about how many hair products you use in just a week’s worth of time. Then, think about how much sweat probably transpires as well. Those two things alone should make you want to scrub your scalp on wash day, right?
Something that’s awesome about applying this particular tip is scalp scrubs are a wonderful way to exfoliate your scalp, remove product build-up, unclog your scalp’s pores/hair follicles, soothe an itchy scalp, and get rid of any dandruff flakes that you may have.
There are plenty of scalp scrubs on the market that you can use (like the ones thatInStyle provided here and Byrdie offered up here). Personally, I like to make my own. A homemade scrub that I can cosign on is featured right here. Also, if you want to learn more about scalp scrubs and why they are super beneficial overall, check out the YouTube video on Curly Chemistry’s channel here; she breaks it all the way down.
8. Massage with Peppermint Oil
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Did you know that if you have a headache or any type of muscle or joint discomfort, applying some peppermint oil can bring about some much-needed relief? Not only that, but it’s the kind of oil that’s good for treating coughs, shortening the lifespan of colds, and reducing stress (via aromatherapy). Your scalp could definitely benefit from a peppermint oil massage because the menthol that’s in it helps to increase blood circulation to your scalp so that your hair follicles are able to receive more of the nutrients that they need.
Also, if you happen to be like me and you struggle with a dry and itchy scalp from time to time, peppermint oil can moisturize and soothe itchiness simultaneously.
9. Use Grapeseed Oil for Oily Scalp and Jamaican Black Castor Oil for a Dry or Itchy Scalp
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The people who say that you shouldn’t oil your hair or scalp? Yeah, I totally ignore them. Scalp is still skin, and if the skin on the rest of my body needs moisture, why wouldn’t my scalp require it, too? The key is to use the kind of oils that will benefit your scalp the most. For instance, if your scalp is naturally oily, grapeseed oil is a lighter oil that’s full of vitamin E that will moisturize without weighing your hair down. Another benefit is it helps to fight frizz; plus, it’s a great complement if your hair happens to be on the finer/thinner side.
On the other hand, if your scalp is dry (and/or your hair is thick), the omega-6 and omega-9 fatty acids that are found in Jamaican black castor oil can do wonders when it comes to deeply nourishing your scalp, increasing blood circulation to it and strengthening your hair while reducing breakage on a pretty significant level. Yeah, your scalp and hair oil can definitely go hand in hand — the type of oil and not going overboard with the amount are the keys to making oil work in your favor.
10. Read Product Labels
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You’ve probably heard somewhere that 60 percent of what you put onto your skin can be absorbed into your bloodstream. While many health and skin professionals agree that it’s a conclusion that is an exaggeration, what is irrefutable is your skin does take in some amount of what you put onto it — I mean, you do have pores, after all. So, for the sake of your scalp, your hair, and your health overall, put in a bit of time to check out the labels of the hair products that you’re considering before purchasing them. Sulfates and alcohol will dry out your hair and scalp.
Parabens have been linked to cancer (because they mimic estrogen). Synthetic fragrances can irritate your scalp. Phthalates, which oftentimes create the fragrance in products, can increase your risk of heart disease. Yeah, it might take a couple of more minutes to read the fine print on hair care bottles — oh, but think about the good you’ll be doing, from head to toe, if you do. Especially as far as your scalp’s health and well-being is concerned. And isn’t it deserving? Indeed.
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Different puzzle pieces are creating bigger pictures these days. 2024 will mark a milestone on a few different levels, including the release of my third book next June (yay!).
I am also a Professional Certified Coach. My main mission for attaining that particular goal is to use my formal credentials to help people navigate through the sometimes tumultuous waters, both on and offline, when it comes to information about marriage, sex and relationships that is oftentimes misinformation (because "coach" is a word that gets thrown around a lot, oftentimes quite poorly).
I am also still super devoted to helping to bring life into this world as a doula, marriage life coaching will always be my first love (next to writing, of course), a platform that advocates for good Black men is currently in the works and my keystrokes continue to be devoted to HEALTHY over HAPPY in the areas of holistic intimacy, spiritual evolution, purpose manifestation and self-love...because maturity teaches that it's impossible to be happy all of the time when it comes to reaching goals yet healthy is a choice that can be made on a daily basis (amen?).
If you have any PERSONAL QUESTIONS (please do not contact me with any story pitches; that is an *editorial* need), feel free to reach out at missnosipho@gmail.com. A sistah will certainly do what she can. ;)
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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When discussing the topic of raising children, discipline is often the first thing that comes to mind. Children need discipline. Full stop. But what is discipline? And how do we draw the line between discipline and revenge?
The origin of the word "discipline" can be traced back to the Latin word "disciplina," which means "instruction" or "teaching." Over time, however, discipline has come to be synonymous with punishment, with parents relying on shame, fear, and/or physical pain to curb undesirable behavior.
Teaching takes time, so nipping it in the bud in whatever fashion parents deem necessary (within reason) has become the norm. But is this what’s best for children? And when does it become less about curbing undesirable behavior and more about getting our licks back for offenses we feel our children should know better to do?
In my work as a parenting coach, I’ve often heard parents say, “I asked him nicely three times before spanking him. He didn’t stop doing it until I did, so clearly talking doesn’t work.”
And the parent isn’t wrong. Talking often doesn’t work the first, the third, or the even the 10th time. And the reason is directly tied to brain development.
Children cannot and do not process information the way an adult can. Auditory processing is not fully developed until a child is 14 or 15 years old. And even then, if a child has auditory processing delays or Auditory Processing Disorder (APD), they may always struggle with processing auditory commands. According to Susie S. Loraine, MA, CCC-SLP, the term auditory processing refers to how the brain perceives and interprets sound information. Several skills determine auditory processing ability—or listening success. They develop in a general four-step hierarchy, but all work together and are essential for daily listening.
Without this understanding, discipline can easily become revenge because parents will then view their child’s misdeeds as a personal slight. Instead of teaching them to do better, parents now want to show them the consequences of not doing better. This is why it's imperative for parents to discern between discipline and revenge to maintain healthy relationships with their children.
5 WAYS TO DISTINGUISH BETWEEN PARENTAL GUIDANCE AND RETALIATION:
Understanding The Intent
Discipline is rooted in love and concern for the child's well-being. It focuses on teaching lessons and helping children understand the consequences of their actions. Conversely, revenge-driven actions stem from a desire to inflict pain or punishment as payback for perceived slights or disobedience. Parents should reflect on their motives before taking disciplinary actions. Ask yourself whether your intention is to help your child learn or to make them suffer for upsetting you.
Example: If a child accidentally breaks a valuable item, a disciplinary response would involve discussing the importance of being careful and working with the child to come up with a way to replace or fix what they’ve broken. On the other hand, a vengeful reaction might involve yelling, harsh punishment, or bringing up past mistakes to intensify guilt.
Maintaining Emotional Regulation
Effective discipline requires parents to remain calm and composed, even in challenging situations. It's natural to feel upset or frustrated when children misbehave, but responding with anger or resentment can escalate the situation and blur the line between discipline and revenge. Before addressing the issue, take a moment to breathe and collect your thoughts.
Example: If a child cannot follow instructions, a disciplined response would involve calmly explaining why their cooperation is necessary in working with the child to accomplish the goal. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve shouting, name-calling, or resorting to physical punishment out of anger.
Promoting Growth and Learning
Discipline should always aim to promote growth and learning. It involves guiding children toward making better choices and understanding the impact of their actions on themselves and others. Effective discipline strategies include positive reinforcement, setting clear expectations, and providing opportunities for reflection and growth.
Example: If a child repeatedly forgets to complete their chores, a disciplinary approach would involve discussing the importance of responsibility and finding solutions together, such as creating a chore chart or setting reminders with Siri or Alexa. In contrast, a revenge-driven response might involve imposing overly harsh punishments or belittling the child, which can undermine their self-esteem and hinder their ability to learn from their mistakes.
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Building Trust and Communication
Trust and open communication are essential components of a healthy parent-child relationship. Discipline should strengthen this bond by fostering trust and encouraging children to confide in their parents without fear of judgment or retaliation. When children feel safe and supported, they're more likely to accept discipline as a form of guidance rather than punishment.
Example: If a child admits to breaking a rule or making a mistake, a disciplined response would involve listening to their perspective, discussing the consequences of their actions, and working together to find a solution. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve accusations, blame, or shutting down communication, which can erode trust and damage the parent-child relationship.
Seeking Professional Guidance
Parenting is a learning journey, and, disciplining children is a delicate balance between guiding them toward responsible behavior and nurturing their growth. By understanding the intent behind our actions, maintaining emotional regulation, promoting growth and learning, building trust and communication, and seeking professional guidance when needed, as parents we can help our children built on love, respect, and understanding.
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