There are a billion-and-one reasons why all women should consider themselves to be extraordinary beings with supernatural powers. Shoot, I am reminded of this every time my period rolls around. Although I've been fortunate to not experience a ton of cramping or any real menstrual-related discomfort, I do bloat, I am drained, a period pimple or two is sure to pop up (and leave a mark), the first two days are like bleed central…and, then there's the cravings. The week before and a couple of days into my period, anything processed and/or sugary, I'm all for it!
If you can totally relate to that last part, don't let anyone cause you to think that it's all in your head. The sugar that you desire is due to the drop in progesterone and estrogen that your body is experiencing. The dip in your serotonin (the feel-good hormone in your system) is why you want carbs like potato chips, pastries and all things white (white rice, white bread, white pasta, etc.). Problem is, while these foods may taste really good, they actually can make your period so much worse due to them causing things like fluctuating hormones, dehydration and a lack of sleep.
So, what exactly should you be eating in order to have a more pleasant menstrual cycle? According to science—and a little taste-testing on my end—here are some that will definitely make that one week a month, so much easier to bear.
1. Dark Chocolate
In every way and form that I can possibly think of, dark chocolate is dope. On the health tip, all of the antioxidants in it makes dark chocolate good for your heart, libido, blood pressure, vision and moods. And yes, get totally excited because dark chocolate is something that you shouldn't feel the least bit guilty about eating when you're on your period.
If you eat a high-quality form of it (it needs to have at least 65 percent cacao in it), the magnesium that's in dark chocolate will reduce the intensity of your cramps and trigger the endorphins in your system so that you feel happier—or at least less stressed.
2. Bananas
A naturally sweet way to get a good amount of potassium and fiber into your system is to have a banana. Some other cool things about this particular fruit is it can help to prevent diabetes, asthma, high blood pressure and cardiovascular disease. If you've got a Charlie horse, bananas can bring instant relief and, the Vitamin A in bananas make them a great way to keep your eyes healthy and strong.
Eating a banana is good for you during your period because oftentimes cramping worsens as the result of having too little potassium in our bodies. Not only that, but the Vitamin B6 that's also in this kind of fruit can soothe any back discomfort that your period may bring to your body.
3. Watermelon
When I'm writing on topics like this, I like to mention when foods are in season; that way, you can get them when they've got the most nutrients and they taste the best. As far as watermelon goes, it's a fruit that is at its peak from May-September. This is a food that will not only keep you hydrated (something that you definitely need when you're on your period; more on that in just a sec), it also has a good amount of vitamins A and C, is able to help prevent certain types of cancer, reduce bodily inflammation and, if you eat some of it following a workout, the citrulline (an amino acid) that is in watermelon can help to decrease any muscle soreness that you may be experiencing.
Since watermelon is made up of so much water (92 percent), it, along with its natural sugar (6 percent), can also soothe your period cramps. It's definitely a healthier alternative to OTC meds.
4. Infused Water
The reason why we all need to drink more water than usual whenever we're on our period is because it's the shift in our progesterone and estrogen levels that causes us to feel bloated and can sometimes end up causing constipation. If you'd honestly rather drink anything but water, make your own infused kind. That way, the water will have a little extra flavor to it, plus the fresh fruits, veggies and/or herbs will give your system some more of the nutrients that it probably needs.
Whatever you do, just make sure that you don't eat a billion bowls of cereal or get a large milkshake. Dairy contains something known as arachidonic acid that can trigger cramps or make them more intense. Also, soda and coffee aren't really your friends either. They are good at putting your hormones on even more of a roller coaster ride. Who wants that?!
5. Saffron
Let's throw a spice in here, shall we? When's the last time you cooked with a little bit of saffron? It's got the kind of antioxidants that fight cancer, lower blood sugar levels, reduce heart disease risk and can increase the libido in both men and women (if you take a 30 mg supplement on a daily basis, that is).
What a lot of people don't know is saffron is also pretty awesome at treating PMS and mood swings. On the PMS tip, saffron soothes food cravings, headaches and any pain that's associated with your period. Also, if you typically find yourself feeling kinda blue (or straight-up pissed) during that time of the month, this a spice that is effective at treating mild depression (again, so long as you consume it on a regular basis).
6. Popcorn
OK, before you get too excited, I'm not talking about movie popcorn that's doused in butter and salt. But yes, popcorn (especially if you pop it yourself—on the stove and not in the microwave) that has as little "extra" on it as possible is a multi-grain food that contains vitamins B1, B3 and B6, magnesium, manganese (a ton of that!), zinc, potassium, copper, phosphorus and iron. Something else that popcorn has in it is a good amount of antioxidants. So yeah, possibly without you even knowing it, it's the kind of snack food that can boost your immune system.
The reason why it's perfectly fine to curl up with a bowl of popcorn and binge-watch your favorite show while you're on your cycle is because popcorn also triggers the production of serotonin in your system. When serotonin is flowing, you end up being in a better mood and getting a sounder night's rest too.
7. Spinach
Spinach is a low-calorie (25 of 'em per serving) vegetable that offers all sorts of nutrients. It's got vitamins A, B6, C, E, K, folic acid, calcium and iron in it. It also contains plant compounds like lutein, quercetin and zeaxanthin. All of these nutrients make it possible for spinach to fight off free radicals, improve your vision and lower your blood pressure. At the same time, if you are prone to kidney stones, you probably shouldn't eat spinach on a daily basis; the calcium and oxalates that's in it could actually cause a kidney stone to form (#themoreyouknow).
Since spinach does have a lot of iron in it, eating some is a good way to get your blood back on track. And, since it also contains Vitamin E, a little green juice or spinach salad can decrease any menstrual discomfort you might be feeling too.
8. Blackberries
The peak season for blackberries is July thru August. I recommend getting some because, not only do they have a lot of vitamins A, C and K in them, they also are full of fiber and manganese too. Aside from the fact that, the antibacterial and anti-inflammatory properties in blackberries can keep the cavities away. And this fruit can boost your brain health too.
Another plus with blackberries is they are able to bring balance back to your hormones (that just may be all over the place during your period). Also, if you are naturally low in estrogen, they just might give that a bit of a boost as well. (For the record, blueberries can also accomplish a lot of these same things.)
9. Cramp Bark Tea
Gee, it's almost poetic that the herb viburnum is also known as cramp bark. Because it contains properties that suppress muscle spasms and reduce muscle tension, it's the type of herb that can relieve symptoms that are related to inflammation, tension headaches and even arthritis. If you're dealing with symptoms related to perimenopause or menopause, it can reduce some of those as well.
Since this is the type of herb that works so well with muscle discomfort, it makes perfect sense why it would be a great herb to treat menstrual cramps. Not only that, but the phenolic compounds in cramp bark can also aid in treating endometriosis or speed up the physical healing process of a miscarriage.
You can take this herb in supplement form, but I recommend drinking it as a hot tea because that can feel super soothing. A brand of cramp bark that's good is Tea Haven's Cramp Bark Tea.
10. Lentils
I don't know about you, but something that I find to be a great comfort food (especially when the cold weather sets in) is some homemade lentil soup. It's a good source of protein and fiber, contains a pretty impressive amount of calcium (38 grams per cup) and, if you're pregnant, it's also a good way to get some (more) folic acid into your system. I decided to end this particular food round up with lentils because two other nutrients that it contains are iron and magnesium.
Due to all of the blood that is lost during our period (the average is around 16 teaspoons), we need the iron replenishment, for sure. And, as far as magnesium goes, if you tend to have trouble sleeping during your period, having some lentils for dinner may help you to get some much needed z-z-z's so that you—and your period—can tackle another day. (If you want to make some of your own soup, Chef Mama Rosa has a recipe for you here. Enjoy!)
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So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.
In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.
In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.
And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.
We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.
So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.
That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.
This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
Featured image by xoStaff
It’s not like it has to be a bad thing. In fact, studies say that somewhere around 15 percent of engaged couples actually met through a friend. All I’m saying is, before you entertain someone’s “I’ve got someone I want you to meet” invitation, it would benefit you to interview them first — for the sake of all parties involved.
The questions that I recommend asking? The following six are what I think can get everyone on the same page, so that there is more pleasure than regret from the hook-up attempt.
1. Why Are They So Invested?
GiphyTwo things that I recently watched over again are the series Survivor’s Remorse (the writing is so damn good) and a movie called Trapped in Temptation (both are currently on Tubi). Something that both of them made me think about is the fact that motive reveals a lot when it comes to why people say and do the things that they do.
When it comes to the movie, specifically, without giving the film away — let me just say that, if you are in a relationship, be really careful about listening to individuals who try to talk you out of maintaining it. More times than not, the motive is shady as hell. And honestly, sometimes people who are close to obsessed with you being in one deserve a bit of side-eye too.
Now, if it’s someone who loves all things love, they are in love and they want you to experience something similar — that’s sweet. Just make sure that they are approaching the set up from a healthy space. What I mean by that is they don’t see singleness as some sort of relational handicap or they aren’t trying to override what you want for your life as if they somehow know better (there are so many ways to be a control freak, y’all).
Hmph. Now that I think about it — make sure that the set-up crew isn’t trying to use you to “save” some male friend or relative of theirs. I say that because I once knew a mother whose son had — count ‘em — 10 kids and she was FOREVER trying to get me to date him. Girl, that wasn’t for me. She was looking for a Holy Ghost Jr. for that child of hers. I’ll pass. HARD PASS.
Bottom line with this one — if someone wants to set you up with someone else, the first thing to ask is why? Make sure to really listen to what their answer is. Then pay attention to if your mind, body and spirit are at peace with their answer(s).
2. Do They Know What You Want?
GiphyI don’t know about y’all, but the people (and let’s be honest, by far, it’s usually women) who have tried to set me up with someone? They didn’t even know what my preferences or type was. Hell, they didn’t even know my thoughts or timeline as it relates to being in a serious relationship were either. And what that boils down to is they were trying to hook me up based on their agenda, not mine — and that usually meant that the guys who they came up with? Yeah…I was good on them. LOL.
Yeah, if someone wants to hook you up, you definitely should ask them if they know what you are looking for in a guy when it comes to his looks, personality, passions, spirituality, relational desires and goals, location, etc. Because, indeed, what is the point in going out with someone who is fine as hell and yet, you want kids and he doesn’t (or vice versa) or who has a great personality yet he isn’t even in the same ballpark of your spiritual beliefs?
If your friend really wants to help you out, valuing your time should come with that — and that means bringing someone into your life who complements your lifestyle. No wiggle room here.
3. Are They Aware of Your Deal-Breakers?
GiphyLast year, I wrote an article for the platform entitled, “Should Bad Sex Actually Be A Relationship Deal-Breaker?” The thing that I think needs to go on record about deal-breakers is they aren’t exactly standards that you have. No, a deal-breaker is something that can’t be worked out even after trying to negotiate or compromise. When it comes to relationships, a deal-breaker might be how long two people should date before becoming exclusive or getting engaged. Another deal-breaker might be if being religious is more important than being spiritual and how that manifests itself (church or no church, etc.). And yes, another deal-breaker may be what each other’s sexual needs and expectations are.
When someone is setting you up, it is imperative that they know about your standards. For instance, for me, I am not interested in dating a divorced person, pretty much ever (I Corinthians 7:10-11). I’ve had friends who have tried to hook me up with that demographic before and it has always been a moot effort. The fact that some of them have gotten frustrated with my convictions has absolutely nothing to do with me. Some have tried to get me to compromise my deal-breakers too — like a long-distance relationship. Is it a firm “naw”? No. However, it’s not really something that I am interested in, so why not just…recommend someone local?
Yeah, if someone thinks that they know you well enough to hook you up, they absolutely should be well-versed in what your deal-breakers are before they do. And if they’ve never asked, all they are doing is assuming — and we know what that typically means. LOL.
4. What Is Their Track Record?
GiphyIt’s kind of wild that we now live in a time when more couples meet online than they do through “old-fashioned ways” like via their friends (although some reports say that Gen Z is getting back to that) — and yet, here we are. Still, if you are willing to let someone play pseudo matchmaker in your life, you are well within your rights to inquire about their track record in that department. Have they hooked others up, successfully, before? Has any of their “Cupid work” caused both people to get exactly what they wanted out of the situation? If/when things went awry, why was that?
I know someone who is constantly trying to hook people up. Thing is, maybe 10-15 percent (no joke) of their efforts have proven to be positive and fruitful — and we’re talking about close to close to two decades of them doing it. Listen, time is too precious to be out here doing stuff ONLY to please other people. That said, if someone wants you to devote some time to one of their grand ideas, you are well within your rights to ask about their past and current success score when it comes to it.
5. Can They Keep Their Own Feelings Out of It?
GiphyWanna know if someone who is offering to do something for you is actually doing it more for themselves? If they try to make it be about them when things don’t go the way they would like, that is a dead ringer. An example? They post a message about you on social media and then question you about why you didn’t do the same thing in return. Another example? They do something for you and then throw it in your face during an argument. Still another example? They set you up with someone, it doesn’t work out, and suddenly you’ve put them in a weird spot. No dear — you put your own self in that position by trying to hook two people up in the first place.
I promise you, it will spare everyone unnecessary energy spent (or even drama experienced) if, before you agree to be hooked up, you get the matchmaker on record stating that they will keep their emotions out of it as much as possible. MEANING — they will do the introductions and then let the chips fall where they may. If they can’t do this, my two cents (save it or spend it) would be to decline the offer. Because all you need is someone texting you about why you haven’t called their cousin back or having an attitude with you when you break up with some guy at their church who they thought was the perfect catch (P.S. These aren’t hypothetical examples — LOL).
6. Will They Respect Your Boundaries? Start to Finish?
GiphyYeah, this final one is a biggie. Just because someone sets you up with another person, that doesn’t automatically or necessarily mean that they should have the right to the details of the dynamic. I don’t care if it’s the first date or the 10th date. I don’t care if you decide to just be sex buddies or to have a full-blown relationship. I don’t care if you stay together or break-up — it’s your relationship which makes it your business. Whatever you share is privileged data.
Yeah, I would say that probably the most challenging thing about being hooked up by someone you know is they have a tendency to think that they are a part of the relationship too — and that is a lie. If things go well beyond a couple of dates, you and the guy should discuss what you will both share with the person who introduced you and then agree to stick to that boundary, no matter what. It’s a great way to protect the dynamic, to keep “outside voices” from influencing the growth and to navigate how you want to move, moving forward.
Someone who hooked you up for the right reasons and knows how to honor limits? They will understand. Will they ask questions? Absolutely. Will they pry? Nah.
___
Should you sit and let someone hook you up? I mean, you never know how your blessing will come. Just make sure that they are prepared for you to do some digging into their mindset before they start sweetly meddling into your love life.
It’s only fair. Hell, and right. LOL.
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