Y'all, if there is any phrase that could serve as the official one for 2020, it would have to be, "Whew. I need a drink!". So, while it's still basically burning up outside, I figured it would be (no pun intended) cool to share with you some alcoholic recipes that center around two themes—summertime and your sex drive. All of these either feature a fruit that is in season during the summer season or they're the type of drink that seems best served during the warmer times of the year. Plus, all of them have ingredients (including alcohol which automatically lowers our inhibitions) that can make you want to enjoy a sunset and then—an even longer night.
So, if you'd like to kick back and enjoy a drink that tastes good and will make your sex life even better, make sure to bookmark this article. That way, next time you go to the grocery and liquor store, you'll know just what to get to boost your libido way up!
1. Kiwi Blackberry Summer Sangria
(Recipe by Yummy Mummy Kitchen)
- A bottle of white wine
- 12 ounce can or container of berry juice
- 3 very ripe kiwis, peeled and sliced
- 1/2 cup of blackberries
- 1/3 cup of loosely packed fresh mint
Put all of the ingredients into a large pitcher. Stir until well mixed with a wooden spoon. Then refrigerate until you're ready to drink it.
I personally don't know anyone who doesn't thoroughly enjoy a tall glass of Sangria. Well, if you want to try one that will help to totally get you in the mood, this one will do it. First up, kiwi (for the record, some are in peak season from March thru June while others are from June thru August), is packed with Vitamin C. Not only does Vitamin C play a significant role in keeping your immune system nice and strong, it also helps to keep hormones like androgen, estrogen and progesterone balanced. Plus, Vitamin C has a pretty good reputation for boosting sex drives and increasing fertility as well.
Then, when you add blackberries (which are their ripest between June and August) into the mix, the Vitamin E (along with Vitamin C) that are in them can increase blood circulation throughout your body (including when it comes to your genitals), intensify your orgasms and can even make you hornier if your libido has been lower lately.
Oh, and of course, the white wine helps. That's because wine contains ethanol which is a type of alcohol that stimulates the part of your brain that regulates your hormone levels and elevates your sex drive.
(As a heads up, I changed the mint from ½ cup to 1/3 cup because too much menthol can actually decrease testosterone levels in some people. If you want to just use it as a garnish, that's cool too.)
2. Chilled Mexican Chocolate Cocktail
(Recipe by Rick Bayless)
- 2 ounces of chilled Mexican hot chocolate
- 1 ½ ounces of añejo tequila
- ½ ounce of ancho chile liqueur
- Shaved Mexican chocolate (for garnish)
Put all of the ingredients into a cocktail shaker. Shake for 15-20 seconds. Double strain into a martini glass and then add chocolate for garnish.
OK, so I'm kinda already thinking that you've heard somewhere that chocolate is an aphrodisiac. The main two reasons why are because 1) chocolate contains tryptophan which helps to build serotonin; that helps to increase sexual arousal in both men and women, and 2) chocolate has the organic compound phenylethylamine in it; it helps people to feel more attached to one another. As far as tequila (which is made by steaming the agave plant) goes, well—if you've ever had a couple of shots of it before, you know how it can quickly get you to turn up! Many Mexicans consider it to be the strongest of all aphrodisiacs (chile). Chilling this drink makes it the perfect summer deck cocktail.
3. Champagne Ginger Cocktail
(Recipe by The Seasoned Mom)
- 2 teaspoons of grated fresh ginger
- 1/2 cup of granulated white sugar
- 1/4 cup of water
- A pinch ground cinnamon (optional)
- A pinch ground nutmeg (optional)
- 1 bottle of summer champagne
Place a fine mesh sieve over a large bowl. In a small saucepan, combine ginger, sugar (along with the cinnamon and nutmeg, if you wish) and bring everything to a boil while stirring the mixture for two minutes. Pour the syrup through the sieve. Refrigerate the syrup in a glass bottle. When you're ready to serve the drinks, put a tablespoon of the syrup into a champagne flute and fill the glass with champagne. Serve immediately.
If you didn't know that ginger serves as its own aphrodisiac, now is as a good a time as any to bring that fact up. It's the kind of plant that is great for men as it relates to their strengthening their libido and improving their sperm quality. One study even revealed that ginger is a natural way to help treat erectile dysfunction. And, if you add it to a nice rosé—which is more "summery" than say, a red wine—it can feel light and festive. Oh, and while adding cinnamon and nutmeg is totally up to you, cinnamon is a sexy scent that is able to warm up your body in a way that simulates feeling aroused while nutmeg is a stimulant that has been associated with natural ways to treat infertility.
4. Grapefruit and Cucumber-Infused Cocktail
(Recipe by Modest Marce)
For the cucumber-infused vodka:
- 1 cup of vodka
- ½ cucumber, sliced
For the cocktail:
- 1 ½ ounce of cucumber infused vodka
- 1 teaspoon of white sugar
- 2 ounces of freshly squeezed grapefruit juice
- 1 to 2 ounces of sparkling water
- ½ cucumber, sliced for garnish
In order to infuse the cucumbers with the vodka, place both ingredients into a glass jar and let everything sit overnight. The next day, strain out the cucumber slices. Put the vodka, along with all of the other ingredients, into a cocktail shaker. Shake for 30-40 seconds. Then pour the drink into a glass that is filled with ice and serve immediately.
For the most part, the top of the year through August is the best time to slice open a couple of grapefruits. On the libido-boosting tip, it's a fruit that is loaded with Vitamin C, folic acid and antioxidants. The combination of those nutrients is able to increase your sex drive. Plus, if you're a woman who has been experiencing a low level of estrogen, this is a fruit that can actually alter the enzyme aromatase, so that the testosterone in your system can be turned into estrogen. The cucumbers in this drink contain Vitamin B3 to keep you and your partner's hormones well-balanced. If you wanna kick things up a couple of more notches, try some Lust Vodka. You can read why I say so here.
5. Spicy Ancho Chile Daiquiri
(Recipe by Vine Pair)
- 1 ounce of rum
- 1 ounce of Ancho Reyes Verde
- 1 ounce of lime juice
- ½ ounce of simple syrup
- 1 cup of ice
Combine all of the ingredients into a cocktail shaker. Shake them for 30 seconds and strain them in a serving glass. Add a fresh chile (if you'd like) for garnish.
Limes are at their best if you cop them between May and October. Since they're considered to be a citrus fruit, they can help your sex life out because they've got vitamins B and C, along with potassium and folic acid. Vitamins B and C are great for maintaining overall sexual health, folic acid keeps women's reproductive health intact and potassium can help to keep your blood pressure low so that blood circulation flows freely and your partner's erections remain strong and long.
6. Gin Cocktail with Honey and Lemon Cordial
(Recipe by Simply-Delicious-Food)
- ¾ cup fynbos honey
- 2 cups water
- ¾ cup muscovado dark brown sugar
- Juice and zest of 4 lemons
Put all of the ingredients into a saucepan and bring them to a boil. Turn down the burner and allow the mixture to simmer for 15 minutes until it turns an amber color. Remove the mixture from the heat and allow it to completely cool down. Then strain the lemon zest. Pour the liquid into glass bottles and refrigerate until the drink is cold. (This should last for a couple of months if you keep the bottles in the refrigerator.)
Lemons are also a citrus fruit. But aside from the other libido-boosting benefits that I've already mentioned, there are a few more reasons to want to get more lemons into your system when it comes to improving your sexual health and, ultimately your sex life. Lemons are able to assist in detoxifying your system; the less toxins you've got, the easier it will be for your blood to flow through your system. Lemons also contain anti-inflammatory properties that can support your man's erections to last longer. Lemons can kick your metabolism into overdrive and, thanks to the citrate that's in them, lemons can help to reduce any bodily pain or discomfort you might be feeling too. Plus, if you add a little bit of honey into the mix, honey can make the drink and its after-effects that much sweeter due to the B vitamins in it that will assist in the production of your partner's testosterone as the boron that's also in it will elevate your estrogen levels, just a tad.
7. The Summer Fling
(Recipe by I'd Rather Be a Chef)
- 1 bottle of rosé
- 10 strawberries, sliced
- 1/2 lemon, sliced
- 2 1/2 cups of lemonade
- 1 bottle champagne or cava
Put the sliced strawberries and lemons into a glass pitcher. Then add the champagne and lemon, cover the pitcher, and put the mixture into the freezer so that it can marinate for at least 4-5 hours. Next, fill your champagne flutes up halfway, topping your glasses off with champagne or cava.
Honestly, May and June are the time of the year when you're almost guaranteed to get a deliciously sweet batch of strawberries, pretty much any time you go to the store. But if you purchase some now until summer ends, you should still be alright. Good thing too because strawberries top the list of being a super sexy fruit. Besides them being sexy to watch someone eat, strawberries are another fruit that are high in Vitamin C. Not only that, but strawberries are full of zinc; zinc can help to increase your vaginal lubrication while keeping your partner's sperm nice and healthy. The aphrodisiacs in these types of berries can increase blood circulation too, including the blood that goes down to you and yours' genitalia and—well, we already discussed that that can do. #wink
8. Saratoga Cocktail
(Recipe by Cold-Glass)
- 1 ounce of brandy
- 1 ounce of rye whiskey
- 1 ounce of sweet vermouth
- 2 dashes of Angostura bitters
- A couple of orange slices
Combine all of the ingredients into a glass bottle. Then pour into a chilled cocktail glass that's filled with ice cubes and garnish it with a slice of orange.
This drink gets its own shout-out because bitters are also a wonderful detoxifier. As a bonus, bitters have also been attributed to helping to alleviate back pain and stomachaches. This is great to know if your head wants to get some, but your body isn't totally into the idea—just yet. A couple of glasses of this and you could be good to go in under an hour or less. So, drink up while the summer is still super hot (and can get even hotter), sis!
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
Exclusive: Melanie Fiona On Making High-Vibrational Music & Saying Yes To Partnership
Melanie Fiona is back! After taking a little more than a decade-long hiatus, she has officially made her return to music and blessed us with two singles, “Say Yes” and “I Choose You.” While both singles are very different from each other, they both reflect who she is today and the type of music she wants to make. In our conversation, the mom of two expressed what she learned during her time away.
“It's interesting, even when I said it is like coming back, I don't ever feel like I really left because I was always still performing. I've still been public. It's not like I went into being this recluse person or version of myself, but the thing that I really learned in this process is that I think things take time,” Melanie says in a xoNecole exclusive.
“I think often we're so caught up in it, being on the timing of demand or popularity, or, like, striking while the iron is hot and the thing that I've learned is that everything is on God's time. That's it. Every time I thought I would have been ready, or, like, things were taking too long, I had to reship some things, personally, professionally, in my life. I also gave myself permission to make a living, not just make a living, but make a life for myself.”
Making a life for herself included getting married to Grammy-nominated songwriter Jared Cotter, starting a family, and embracing new landscapes, such as podcasting as a co-host of The Mama’s Den podcast. She also began doing more spiritual work and self-care practices like meditation, sound healing, Reiki, acupuncture, and boundary setting, which allowed her to get in touch with her inner voice.
“I wasn't putting out music, and I wasn't experiencing a number one record, but I was being a number one mom,” she says.
“I was experiencing things that were allowing me to heal and get in touch with myself so that I could make new music from a space of joy and freedom, and excitement again because I definitely feel like I did lose some excitement because of just politics and industry and what it can do to your mental health and even your physical health. So giving myself the space to really just say, ‘Hey, it's okay. Everything's right on time.’”
The joy and excitement are felt in one of two new singles, “I Choose You,” which is more of a lovers rock vibe, a tribute to Melanie’s Caribbean roots. While the Grammy award-winner is known for ballads like “It Kills Me” and “Fool For You,” she is becoming more intentional about the music she makes, calling it high-vibrational music. She says her music is a “reflection of my life,” as it captures every facet, from hanging out with friends to riding around in her car.
“Say Yes” has the classic R&B vibe Melanie is known for. However, both songs are inspired by her relationship. Melanie and Jared got married in December 2020, and the Toronto-bred artist dished on their relationship. Fun fact: he is featured in the “Say Yes” music video.
“When we first started dating, I had come into that relationship post a lot of self-work. I had gotten out of a long-term relationship, I had a year and a half to date and be by myself and do a lot of work on myself alone. And when we met, I remember feeling like this has to be my person because I feel it,” she says.
“And so when we went into that relationship, and we started dating, I was very clear. I was like, I know what I want. I'm very clear on what I need, and I'm not going to withhold my truth about myself in this process because of pride or fear of rejection. I know you love me, but I'm coming with my heart in my hand to let you know that if we're gonna get there, we have to put fear aside and say yes. So that was kind of like my open letter to him, which is why the video is us having a conversation.”
Melanie also shares that saying yes to her partner has empowered her in many ways, including motherhood and showing up for herself. Her new EP, also titled Say Yes, will be available at the top of 2025.
Check out the full interview below.
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Feature image by Franco Zulueta
'Tis The Season For Nail Glam: Holiday Manis For Every Festive Mood
The holidays are an exciting time to enjoy our family and decorate our hearts out. Our Christmas tree, dining table, and style all begin to reflect the joy we feel in the season, but what about our nails? Our nails are the star of the show this time of year. They are the part of ourselves people will see when we pass around presents and Christmas dinner.
Gifting ourselves the self-care we always deserve is a no-brainer, but sometimes we can become overwhelmed with choices.
There are many different nail designs and shapes to choose from, so it can be hard to settle on one. Kia Stewart is a talented celebrity nail artist. Her love for prioritizing nail health and design has gained her an immense amount of respect in the industry. Stewart is always mindful of paying attention to her audience for trends, which has helped her stay ahead of the game. “Recently, full chrome has made a significant comeback, and the classic French manicure remains timeless. 3D nails are trending on TikTok daily, though cat-eye and airbrush styles seem to have taken a backseat this year,” says Stewart.
As far as shapes, Stewart has noticed a huge trend in almond shapes. She believes this is due to the shape being timeless and truly chic. This includes sizes of all kinds. Tis the season to indulge in short and long almond-shaped nails. “Longer styles reminiscent of the ‘90s, complete with deep French tips and vibrant reds. I enjoy the diversity in preferences, as it keeps my work interesting. But the most common trend is self-expression, everyone is wearing nails that speak to them. I champion that it’s a mood.” Keep reading to see Stewart’s work for nail inspiration this holiday season.
Almond Bliss
Want your nails to reflect the gifts under the Christmas tree this year? Try this simple, yet totally festive nail design. Stewart uses the colors red and green to create a minimal nail design that gets its point across. This style can be approached with your natural nails or acrylic if you’re looking to add length.
French Manicure
As Stewart mentioned, a French manicure will never go out of style. However, if you’re looking to spice things up, we recommend playing with color. Incorporating a deep red French tip can be just as chic as traditional white. You can even add a present design (as seen here) if you want your French to be bold. The beauty of this is that you have the freedom to express yourself as you wish.
Deep Red
If Beyoncé is doing deep red, then we should definitely do it too! This deep red seems to be the color of the fall and winter seasons. Keep things elevated with a classic deep red on your hands, or mix it up! You can pair this deep red with white, like in this photo. Having deep red as your base will keep things interesting without having to try as hard.
Chrome
These nails are perfect New Year's Eve inspo for the season. The gold and black are giving us more reason to celebrate this year despite its difficulties. Get into the season with effortless chrome nails and a cool design to match. Watch out, 2025; we are coming for you!
Vibrant Red
The best part about the holiday season is that we can embrace the colors and put our nudes to rest. This vibrant red with gold chrome undertone is a fun way to enter into the happiest time of the year. Leave the red as it is, or add white stripes to create a candy cane look. Either way, you cannot go wrong with this traditional holiday color.
Don’t Be So Green
It’s time green enters the chat this holiday season. Adding a shape of deep green to your nail aesthetic can be a different approach to typical holiday designs. We also love the hint of gold and glitter in this design to add texture and contrast. Step into your green era and go outside the traditional holiday box.
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Featured image by @tylauren, courtesy of Kia Stewart @__luxk