Meet The Sneaker Baes With Enviable Winter Shoe Game
'Tis the season to be cozy so prepare yourself for a stylishly comfortable winter. Although 2020 has been the catalyst of a major shift in our lives, we've all been forced to adjust our wardrobes accordingly all while attempting to remain fly while doing so. In the midst of our lives totally changing overnight, it's been amazing to witness the evolution of fashion and adapting to a forever-changing world through our wardrobes. Even during a life-altering pandemic, as a collective, fashion girls have proven that great style can still be effortless yet practical at the same time.
While winter is always a challenging time of year, sneakers remain a reliable choice for cold weather essentials whether you're a self-proclaimed sneakerhead or not. For the last few months, I'm loving the everyday casual slays witnessed outside and on my Instagram feed. This week, I took lessons from the most fashionable sneaker baes schooling the rest of us on how to experiment with cool casual style this winter season. With a variety of looks paired with the trendiest of styles, these are the best and most colorful sneaker looks I've seen throughout the week.
Brianna Monae, @discoverbri
Black on black may be the chicest of all looks and the perfect setup to add a pop of colorful accessories. Leather pants are a girl's best friend this time of year and, casually speaking, adding a sneaker is a practical way of wearing this cold weather essential this particular winter season.
Charlotte, @samyjovalentine
We've traded in our two-piece office suit for sweatsuits this year and I'm not mad about it. I love this chic winter coat and trendy paper bag clutch paired with a traditional gray sweatsuit and sneakers for a casual glam look. The mixture of cream elevates this leisure look, perfect for the fashion gal on the go.
Sara, @_muellermueller
One thing about this look is the neon green for me! This is the perfect time of year to pair black with colorful neons for an aura like no other. Matching your outfit with your sneaker's color scheme is another fun way to experiment with color. Grab a stylish pair of sunglasses as well and you'll really take it up a few more notches.
Kia, @thenotoriouskia
It's all about color coordination and finding what colors work perfectly with one another. I love this sneaker look because it's practical for everyday wear while inspiring new ways to mix prints and multiple colors in one cool look. Cargo pants are a must-have when thinking of outfits to pair with sneakers as well as vintage sweatshirts for a super stylish throwback look.
Claire Most, @claire_most
Whoever created the infamous mantra, "no white after Labor Day" must have been unaware that fashion simply has no rules, especially in 2021. I'm obsessed with this effortless head-to-toe casual cream outfit, perfect for winter. Super cute and easily achievable, this daytime sneaker look is one for the books.
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Featured image courtesy of Instagram/@samyjovalentine
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As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LISTÂ HERE.
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THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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When discussing the topic of raising children, discipline is often the first thing that comes to mind. Children need discipline. Full stop. But what is discipline? And how do we draw the line between discipline and revenge?
The origin of the word "discipline" can be traced back to the Latin word "disciplina," which means "instruction" or "teaching." Over time, however, discipline has come to be synonymous with punishment, with parents relying on shame, fear, and/or physical pain to curb undesirable behavior.
Teaching takes time, so nipping it in the bud in whatever fashion parents deem necessary (within reason) has become the norm. But is this what’s best for children? And when does it become less about curbing undesirable behavior and more about getting our licks back for offenses we feel our children should know better to do?
In my work as a parenting coach, I’ve often heard parents say, “I asked him nicely three times before spanking him. He didn’t stop doing it until I did, so clearly talking doesn’t work.”
And the parent isn’t wrong. Talking often doesn’t work the first, the third, or the even the 10th time. And the reason is directly tied to brain development.
Children cannot and do not process information the way an adult can. Auditory processing is not fully developed until a child is 14 or 15 years old. And even then, if a child has auditory processing delays or Auditory Processing Disorder (APD), they may always struggle with processing auditory commands. According to Susie S. Loraine, MA, CCC-SLP, the term auditory processing refers to how the brain perceives and interprets sound information. Several skills determine auditory processing ability—or listening success. They develop in a general four-step hierarchy, but all work together and are essential for daily listening.
Without this understanding, discipline can easily become revenge because parents will then view their child’s misdeeds as a personal slight. Instead of teaching them to do better, parents now want to show them the consequences of not doing better. This is why it's imperative for parents to discern between discipline and revenge to maintain healthy relationships with their children.
5 WAYS TO DISTINGUISH BETWEEN PARENTAL GUIDANCE AND RETALIATION:Â Â
​Understanding The Intent
Discipline is rooted in love and concern for the child's well-being. It focuses on teaching lessons and helping children understand the consequences of their actions. Conversely, revenge-driven actions stem from a desire to inflict pain or punishment as payback for perceived slights or disobedience. Parents should reflect on their motives before taking disciplinary actions. Ask yourself whether your intention is to help your child learn or to make them suffer for upsetting you.
Example: If a child accidentally breaks a valuable item, a disciplinary response would involve discussing the importance of being careful and working with the child to come up with a way to replace or fix what they’ve broken. On the other hand, a vengeful reaction might involve yelling, harsh punishment, or bringing up past mistakes to intensify guilt.
​Maintaining Emotional Regulation
Effective discipline requires parents to remain calm and composed, even in challenging situations. It's natural to feel upset or frustrated when children misbehave, but responding with anger or resentment can escalate the situation and blur the line between discipline and revenge. Before addressing the issue, take a moment to breathe and collect your thoughts.
Example: If a child cannot follow instructions, a disciplined response would involve calmly explaining why their cooperation is necessary in working with the child to accomplish the goal. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve shouting, name-calling, or resorting to physical punishment out of anger.
​Promoting Growth and Learning
Discipline should always aim to promote growth and learning. It involves guiding children toward making better choices and understanding the impact of their actions on themselves and others. Effective discipline strategies include positive reinforcement, setting clear expectations, and providing opportunities for reflection and growth.
Example: If a child repeatedly forgets to complete their chores, a disciplinary approach would involve discussing the importance of responsibility and finding solutions together, such as creating a chore chart or setting reminders with Siri or Alexa. In contrast, a revenge-driven response might involve imposing overly harsh punishments or belittling the child, which can undermine their self-esteem and hinder their ability to learn from their mistakes.
Momo Productions/Getty
Building Trust and Communication
Trust and open communication are essential components of a healthy parent-child relationship. Discipline should strengthen this bond by fostering trust and encouraging children to confide in their parents without fear of judgment or retaliation. When children feel safe and supported, they're more likely to accept discipline as a form of guidance rather than punishment.
Example: If a child admits to breaking a rule or making a mistake, a disciplined response would involve listening to their perspective, discussing the consequences of their actions, and working together to find a solution. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve accusations, blame, or shutting down communication, which can erode trust and damage the parent-child relationship.
Seeking Professional Guidance
Parenting is a learning journey, and, disciplining children is a delicate balance between guiding them toward responsible behavior and nurturing their growth. By understanding the intent behind our actions, maintaining emotional regulation, promoting growth and learning, building trust and communication, and seeking professional guidance when needed, as parents we can help our children built on love, respect, and understanding.
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Featured image by Courtney Hale/Getty Images