Kayla Nicole Shares Heartfelt Letter To Black Girls Amid Backlash: 'We Love, We Hurt, We Heal'
The journey to healing after a break-up isn’t linear, but to reach a place of acceptance as time passes is one step closer to closing the chapter.
But when you’re forced to relive your past due to the high-profile nature of your ex’s new relationship, with rumors and opinions swirling around your name, there comes a point where one can choose to move with grace and reclaim the narrative — and thus is the case with Kayla Nicole.
Kayla Nicole, 31, is a sports broadcaster, fitness influencer, and the ex-girlfriend of NFL tight-end star, Travis Kelce. The two began dating in 2017. Then in January of this year, Kelce revealed in an interview with The Pivot that he was “in the free market right now,” confirming the two’s breakup.
Over the last few weeks, the internet has been ablaze with rumors of Kelce now dating pop megastar, Taylor Swift. News of which, had placed Kayla back into public discourses and subjected her to online harassment around her race and Kelce’s preferences.
I feel so bad for Kayla Nicole, that girl is being harassed by annoying Taylor Swift fans and NFL fans and weird black men who have white women fetishes simply because her ex started dating again…
— Kennedy B. (@kennbanks) September 26, 2023
While she wasn’t rushed to make any public statements about the rumors, on Tuesday, the on-air sports journalist took to her Instagram page to share a heartfelt open letter to Black girls and addressed the “backlash" from internet bullies.
“It’s always been really important for me to use my platform, not to create division, but to elevate and unite women, Black women specifically,” she stated in the video.
“Dear Black girl, they may call you a traitor for falling in love. You’ll hope the ones closest will protect you, but you will quickly find out that people don’t protect what they don’t value,” Kayla said.
“They’ll say you’re too much, too provocative, too boisterous, too outspoken, and in the same breath, tell you that you aren’t enough. They’ll say you deserve the backlash and embarrassment. Because of your Blackness, you should have known better. They’ll even try to tie your value to your net worth. But Black girl, please remember your value lies elsewhere. Your value is deep within your heart," she said.
Kayla went on to share the importance of protecting one’s peace from “one-sided” scrutiny, emphasizing the power of silence.
"You don't have to participate in this tumultuous, often one-sided journey. Preserve your heart, even when they try to quantify your character and test your boundaries, you do not have to engage. You do not have to respond because there is power in your silence."
She also expresses solidarity in the human experience, reminding herself and others of their inherent worth and sufficiency on days of self-doubt.
"My truth, trauma, and vulnerability are a relatable part of the human experience. I know I’m not alone and I want to make sure you know that you’re not either. On days when I feel most inadequate, I have to remind myself that I am, have been, and will always be more than enough," Kayla continues.
While every relationship has its rough patches and highlights, Nicole makes notes of this sharing, "We love, we hurt, we heal." Emphasizing that, "Your story is yours to tell. when you feel like nobody knows or understands what it takes to be you, remember that you are a part of something way bigger."
Kayla ends the letter with a reminder that every Black girl deserves to hear, "Most importantly, I want you to remember that you are loved. You are valued. You are allowed to take up space. You deserve protection and your feelings — they matter too."
Recently, Maya Benberry, who dated Kelce after appearing on the dating reality show Catching Kelce in 2016, shared that she had received death threats from Swift’s fan base. “Swifties are aggressive, very negative, very hypocritical,” Maya revealed to Inside Edition. “It’s really crazy to me that someone I think is positive and really nice would have such a negative and angry fan base.”
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Aley Arion is a writer and digital storyteller from the South, currently living in sunny Los Angeles. Her site, yagirlaley.com, serves as a digital diary to document personal essays, cultural commentary, and her insights into the Black Millennial experience. Follow her at @yagirlaley on all platforms!
Exclusive: Melanie Fiona On Making High-Vibrational Music & Saying Yes To Partnership
Melanie Fiona is back! After taking a little more than a decade-long hiatus, she has officially made her return to music and blessed us with two singles, “Say Yes” and “I Choose You.” While both singles are very different from each other, they both reflect who she is today and the type of music she wants to make. In our conversation, the mom of two expressed what she learned during her time away.
“It's interesting, even when I said it is like coming back, I don't ever feel like I really left because I was always still performing. I've still been public. It's not like I went into being this recluse person or version of myself, but the thing that I really learned in this process is that I think things take time,” Melanie says in a xoNecole exclusive.
“I think often we're so caught up in it, being on the timing of demand or popularity, or, like, striking while the iron is hot and the thing that I've learned is that everything is on God's time. That's it. Every time I thought I would have been ready, or, like, things were taking too long, I had to reship some things, personally, professionally, in my life. I also gave myself permission to make a living, not just make a living, but make a life for myself.”
Making a life for herself included getting married to Grammy-nominated songwriter Jared Cotter, starting a family, and embracing new landscapes, such as podcasting as a co-host of The Mama’s Den podcast. She also began doing more spiritual work and self-care practices like meditation, sound healing, Reiki, acupuncture, and boundary setting, which allowed her to get in touch with her inner voice.
“I wasn't putting out music, and I wasn't experiencing a number one record, but I was being a number one mom,” she says.
“I was experiencing things that were allowing me to heal and get in touch with myself so that I could make new music from a space of joy and freedom, and excitement again because I definitely feel like I did lose some excitement because of just politics and industry and what it can do to your mental health and even your physical health. So giving myself the space to really just say, ‘Hey, it's okay. Everything's right on time.’”
The joy and excitement are felt in one of two new singles, “I Choose You,” which is more of a lovers rock vibe, a tribute to Melanie’s Caribbean roots. While the Grammy award-winner is known for ballads like “It Kills Me” and “Fool For You,” she is becoming more intentional about the music she makes, calling it high-vibrational music. She says her music is a “reflection of my life,” as it captures every facet, from hanging out with friends to riding around in her car.
“Say Yes” has the classic R&B vibe Melanie is known for. However, both songs are inspired by her relationship. Melanie and Jared got married in December 2020, and the Toronto-bred artist dished on their relationship. Fun fact: he is featured in the “Say Yes” music video.
“When we first started dating, I had come into that relationship post a lot of self-work. I had gotten out of a long-term relationship, I had a year and a half to date and be by myself and do a lot of work on myself alone. And when we met, I remember feeling like this has to be my person because I feel it,” she says.
“And so when we went into that relationship, and we started dating, I was very clear. I was like, I know what I want. I'm very clear on what I need, and I'm not going to withhold my truth about myself in this process because of pride or fear of rejection. I know you love me, but I'm coming with my heart in my hand to let you know that if we're gonna get there, we have to put fear aside and say yes. So that was kind of like my open letter to him, which is why the video is us having a conversation.”
Melanie also shares that saying yes to her partner has empowered her in many ways, including motherhood and showing up for herself. Her new EP, also titled Say Yes, will be available at the top of 2025.
Check out the full interview below.
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There's something about snuggling up in your favorite blanket and watching a comfort show or movie on Netflix, and what better time to do just that than in December? As the weather outside gets cooler, staying in becomes more of the norm. Thus, Netflix and Chill is a go-to. Luckily, Netflix has released new Black films and series on their popular streaming platform.
From Tyler Perry's historical drama The Six Triple Eight, starring Kerry Washington, to the Will Packer-produced comedy starring Marsai Martin, Regina Hall, and Issa Rae, Little, this season is looking up.
See the full list below.
Little (12/1)
Regina Hall's character is a bossy tech mogul who has everyone scared of her, including her assistant, played by Issa Rae. However, when she transforms into her younger self (Marsai Martin), she learns how to be more kind to others.
Daddy Day Care (12/1)
Eddie Murphy stars in this film as a father who decides to open a daycare after losing his job.
30 For 30 Collection (12/2)
30 For 30 is an ESPN docu-series highlighting some of sports' legendary figures and moments. Some of the episodes include Winning Time: Reggie Miller Vs. The New York Knicks and Celtics/ Lakers: The Best of Enemies.
Jamie Foxx: What Had Happened Was (12/10)
In this special, the multi-talented Jamie Foxx returns to stand-up to give an unforgettable performance.
Blood, Sweat & Heels S2 (12/13)
The short-lived Bravo reality TV series documented the lives of a group of girlfriends making it in NYC. The show starred model-turned-podcaster Melyssa Ford, author Demetria Lucas, and the late TV host Daisy Lewellyn.
The Equalizer S1-3 (12/16)
The hit CBS show starring Queen Latifah is now available on Netflix. Watch the beloved actress kick ass and take names in this popular drama.
The Six Triple Eight (12/20)
The new Tyler Perry film starring Kerry Washington is a true story about the first and only Women’s Army Corps unit of color during World War II.
Christmas Game Day Ravens Vs. Texans (12/25)
While many will tune in to watch the Baltimore Ravens vs. Houston Texans game, others will tune in to watch Beyoncé perform during halftime.
Michelle Buteau: A Buteau-ful Mind At Radio City Music Hall (12/31)
Comedian Michelle Buteau's comedy special will focus on her life with twins, going viral, and much more.
Evil S3 (12/31)
While Evil was unfortunately canceled by CBS, viewers can rewatch the series on Netflix, with season three premiering December 31st.
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