Recently, I had to do something that damn near broke my heart. See, for the past couple of years, I've been someone who went to see my nail tech religiously so that I could take care of something that I got from my mother and my mother's mother. It's something that is actually one of my favorite features—my hands, including my nails. They are long, they've got a dope curve to them and, I am definitely the kind of chick who likes to rock all kinds of random color and design combos. But between this quarantine that we're all currently in and also reading the article, "Are your nails too long? A doctor explains why trimming them and removing chipped polish may help prevent the spread of coronavirus" (le sigh), I decided that it was time to bite the bullet and take my powder acrylic and gel polish off. Ugh.
Only those who have mani/pedis on their self-pampering list can truly get that, while there are certainly a billion more important things to be concerned about, that doesn't take away from the fact that not being able to get our nails done can be a real punch in the gut. It's not about being vain or frivolous; it's about making a point to do something that is just for us that makes us feel good. And, if you're used to going bi-weekly to the nail salon like I am, it's about adjusting to this new normal until…who knows when?
If you totally feel my pain and either you're well past a fill-in or your nails look straight crazy right now and you're not sure what to do about it, I've got some DIY tips that can help to get you through—until you and your own nail tech can be reunited once again.
How to Safely Remove Gel (and Acrylic and Powder-Dipped) Nails
It actually took me a while to get onto the gel manicure train. The main reason is, I didn't want to spend the extra coins. But between constantly hacking away on this laptop of mine, washing dishes and, quite frankly, simply being harder on my nails than I need to be, about a year ago, I gave up the ghost; it's one of the best decisions I've ever made. The only thing I don't like is that sometimes, removing the polish can be a beast (some drills are better than others). So, I was kinda trippin' at first when I tried to figure out how to get the polish from my last salon appointment off of my nails.
If that's your current dilemma, all you need is a bottle of 100 percent acetone (something that also works really well for me is ONYX Professional Gel and All Nail Coatings Soak Off Nail Polish Remover Coconut which I got at Walmart), a file (a 180-grit file is probably best), some cotton balls, a glass bowl and some foil.
If you're going to cut down your nails, do that with a pair of fingernail clippers first. Then, in order to remove the top coat of your gel polish, file all of your nails until the polish looks super dull. Cut a piece of foil into 10 strips (one to cover each nail). Now it's time to pour the acetone into your glass bowl and to pull out your cotton balls. I recommend cutting each cotton ball in half; that way, they won't be all bulky when you place them onto your nails. Put half a ball into the acetone first and then on each nail. Then cover the ball up with some foil. Let the foil sit on your nails for 15-20 minutes. When you remove each strip, you should notice that your gel crumbles right off. And what if you happen to have powder dipped nails? The same steps apply. Just make sure that you follow-up the removal process with some nail cuticle oil or jojoba, sweet almond, lavender, coconut or tea tree oil (every day, for about a week) so that your nails won't get dehydrated.
Note: If you plan on removing all of your acrylic too, follow the same steps. Just keep in mind that, based on how many fill-ins that you've had, getting the acrylic off will take considerably longer. Shoot, I re-watched the movie, How to Tell You're a Douchebag (DeWanda Wise, Charles Brice) and some other film before most of it was gone. Plus, I had to use an e-file in order to get the remnants off. But the patience is what prevents you from damaging your natural nails. Besides, during this quarantine, it's not like you've got anywhere to go…right? Might as well get some binge-watching in while you're soaking.
How to Give Yourself a Gel Manicure
Now that I have nothing on my nails (and they are considerably shorter), I'm actually going to let them chill for a while. I can't remember the last time my nails haven't been covered in something and sometimes breaks are good so that nails can breathe. But if you want to keep the gel polish going in your own world, I totally get it. Here are the steps that you need to follow. (By the way, remember that you'll need a cure lamp for this; there are some pretty affordable ones on the market if you don't own one already; click here to check out a selection.)
- Clip your nails to the length that you want them to be.
- With a fingernail file, file them into the shape that you desire so that they are smooth and even.
- Use a buffer to remove any natural oils that may be on the top of your nails (so that your polish will "stick" better).
- Use a cuticle stick to gently push back your cuticles.
- With your gel kit (check out "Love Gel Manicures but Hate the Price? Try These At-Home Gel Nail Kits" if you want some suggestions on which one to buy), apply an extremely thin layer of the base coat on one hand. Put it underneath a cure light for 20 minutes, then repeat with your other hand.
- Next, apply your first coat of gel polish to one hand. If you happen to get any of the polish onto your skin, dip a nail acrylic brush into some acetone to remove it. If you skip this step and the polish remains on your cuticles, your polish will peel a whole lot faster. Place your hand into your cure lamp for another two minutes, making sure to do this same step for every layer of polish that you apply.
- Apply your top coat and let your hand sit in the cure lamp for 2-2 ½ minutes. Lightly tap the index finger of your other hand onto a couple of your polished fingers, just to make sure that they don't feel sticky and the polish appears smooth. If you don't feel "messiness", you're dry.
- Finally, soak a cotton ball into some rubbing alcohol and rub each nail; it's what will get rid of any "tackiness" or residue that your nails may have. And you're done!
If you are someone who is more of a visual learner, some YouTube sistahs can walk you through this entire process. Check out some how-tos here, here and here. If you'd prefer to powder dip your nails instead, this video has some tips that I thought were super helpful.
How to Do Your Own Acrylic Fill-In
Yeah, this one right here, I don't have nearly enough patience to attempt on my own. But again, right now, we've really got nothing but time, so if you're down to do your own fill-in, I'll include a list of what you'll need, along with a couple of links to YouTubers who can walk you through how to do fill-in your own nails.
- Cuticle Remover
- Cuticle Pusher
- Buffing Block
- Acid-Free Primer
- Nail Dehydrator
- Dappen Dish
- Acrylic Brush
- Acrylic Powder
- Acrylic Liquid
- Top Coat
You can also stop by a local drugstore to pick up a fill-in kit like Kiss Her by Kiss Acrylic Fill Kit for Nails. Here's the video that can walk you through how to DIY this.
How to Make Press-On Nails Last
I'mma tell y'all what—these upgrades in press-on nails truly boggle the mind! One place where you can check out a variety of lengths, shapes and styles is Etsy. If you want yours to last longer than just a couple of days, make sure to apply them with nail glue (a lot of people are super fond of Mia Secret Super-Jet Strong Glue) instead of the adhesives that they typically come with. Speaking of, a YouTuber that I enjoy due to her straight-to-the-point-super-chill delivery says that using that particular glue helps your press-ons to last a whopping three weeks at a time. Her name is Korryn J and she even has her own line of press-on nails. Go here to check out her instructional video and visit Her Fave Boutique to see her signature nail section.
How to Maintain Natural Nails
Even if you decide to go without doing any of this for the time being, that doesn't mean that your nails have to be out here looking a hot and crazy mess. Here are a few things that you can do to keep your natural nails looking beautiful while you're at your crib.
Exfoliate your hands. Dead skin cells can have your hands looking drier and older than they should. A half cup of sugar (brown or white), one-fourth cup of olive oil, and five drops of your favorite essential oil will create a hand scrub that will make your hands feel and look at least a couple of years younger (no joke). Using the scrub while you're in the shower is one of the easiest ways to apply and remove it with as little mess as possible.
Moisturize your hands, nails and cuticles. Please don't be walking around your house all ashy. Remember the cuticle oil alternatives that I mentioned earlier? Apply those on a daily basis so that your hands, nails and cuticles can remain soft and smooth.
Keep your natural nail tips clean with baking soda. Do you want to rock the totally au naturale look? If so, something that will keep the tips of your nails super white is to brush them with baking soda. Just dip them into water, sprinkle some baking soda on an old toothbrush and gently scrub underneath each nail. It will get all of the gunk out while lifting your nails up a shade or two (once a week is more than enough; otherwise, you could dry your nails out).
Vicks to the rescue for (minor) nail fungus. If after you remove your polish or tips, you happen to notice some fungus, applying Vicks VapoRub will help to heal it within a matter of days. (Oregano oil and tea tree oil will too.)
Petroleum jelly can help you to "stay between the lines". Does it seem like, no matter how hard you try, you always seem to get polish on your cuticles (and everywhere else) when you polish them yourself? One way to avoid this is to dip a Q-tip into some petroleum jelly and outline your cuticles with it before applying your nail polish. That way, the polish will not get onto your actual skin.
Vinegar makes your polish last longer. If the last thing you want to think about is painting your nails again any time soon, pour some white vinegar onto a couple of cotton balls and apply them to your nails before you put on your base coat. It will remove any oils or residue, plus it will help your polish to last longer.
(Another hack: If your polish seems to have a hard time going on smoothly, try putting it into the refrigerator for 15-20 minutes. That should fix the problem.)
Ice alleviates chipping polish. One reason why I don't personally polish my fingernails often is because I am super meticulous. If I see a mere chip of polish on a nail, I'm over-obsessing. If you can totally relate, but you want to paint your nails anyway, soaking your hands into a tub of water that has several ice cubes, after you've painted your nails, will help to set the color and prevent chipping. Just make sure to let your nails dry on their own for about seven minutes before placing them in the water (making sure not to hit the ice cubes).
Whew. I know I didn't cover everything but hopefully, this will tide you over. At the very least, you don't have to hold onto polish or fill-ins until…who knows when? You now have a few hacks that can make your nails look presentable. No need to thank me. We're all in this together. I got you, sis.
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
These Are The Manicures We Can't Stop Fawning Over
This Nail Trend Is Perfect For The Woman Who Can Never Pick A Nail Color
Cloud Nails Are Seriously Your Next Dreamy Mani Trend
Building My Vegan Nail Empire Taught Me The Power Of My Wildest Dreams
Featured image by Giphy
- How to Remove Acrylic Nails at Home - PureWow ›
- How to Remove Acrylic Nails at Home, According to a Pro ... ›
- How To Remove Acrylic Nails At Home - Acrylic Nail Removal ... ›
- How to remove acrylic nails at home without damage. ›
- How to Remove Acrylic Nails At Home (With & Without Acetone) ›
- How to Remove Acrylics - Fast and Easy! - YouTube ›
- How to Remove Acrylic Nails at Home - L'Oréal Paris ›
- Remove Acrylic Nails At Home: Step By Step How-To Tutorial ... ›
- How to Remove Acrylic Nails ›
- How to Remove Acrylic Nails at Home Without Damaging Your Nails ... ›
RELATED
So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.
In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.
In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.
And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.
We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.
So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.
That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.
This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
Featured image by xoStaff
It’s not like it has to be a bad thing. In fact, studies say that somewhere around 15 percent of engaged couples actually met through a friend. All I’m saying is, before you entertain someone’s “I’ve got someone I want you to meet” invitation, it would benefit you to interview them first — for the sake of all parties involved.
The questions that I recommend asking? The following six are what I think can get everyone on the same page, so that there is more pleasure than regret from the hook-up attempt.
1. Why Are They So Invested?
GiphyTwo things that I recently watched over again are the series Survivor’s Remorse (the writing is so damn good) and a movie called Trapped in Temptation (both are currently on Tubi). Something that both of them made me think about is the fact that motive reveals a lot when it comes to why people say and do the things that they do.
When it comes to the movie, specifically, without giving the film away — let me just say that, if you are in a relationship, be really careful about listening to individuals who try to talk you out of maintaining it. More times than not, the motive is shady as hell. And honestly, sometimes people who are close to obsessed with you being in one deserve a bit of side-eye too.
Now, if it’s someone who loves all things love, they are in love and they want you to experience something similar — that’s sweet. Just make sure that they are approaching the set up from a healthy space. What I mean by that is they don’t see singleness as some sort of relational handicap or they aren’t trying to override what you want for your life as if they somehow know better (there are so many ways to be a control freak, y’all).
Hmph. Now that I think about it — make sure that the set-up crew isn’t trying to use you to “save” some male friend or relative of theirs. I say that because I once knew a mother whose son had — count ‘em — 10 kids and she was FOREVER trying to get me to date him. Girl, that wasn’t for me. She was looking for a Holy Ghost Jr. for that child of hers. I’ll pass. HARD PASS.
Bottom line with this one — if someone wants to set you up with someone else, the first thing to ask is why? Make sure to really listen to what their answer is. Then pay attention to if your mind, body and spirit are at peace with their answer(s).
2. Do They Know What You Want?
GiphyI don’t know about y’all, but the people (and let’s be honest, by far, it’s usually women) who have tried to set me up with someone? They didn’t even know what my preferences or type was. Hell, they didn’t even know my thoughts or timeline as it relates to being in a serious relationship were either. And what that boils down to is they were trying to hook me up based on their agenda, not mine — and that usually meant that the guys who they came up with? Yeah…I was good on them. LOL.
Yeah, if someone wants to hook you up, you definitely should ask them if they know what you are looking for in a guy when it comes to his looks, personality, passions, spirituality, relational desires and goals, location, etc. Because, indeed, what is the point in going out with someone who is fine as hell and yet, you want kids and he doesn’t (or vice versa) or who has a great personality yet he isn’t even in the same ballpark of your spiritual beliefs?
If your friend really wants to help you out, valuing your time should come with that — and that means bringing someone into your life who complements your lifestyle. No wiggle room here.
3. Are They Aware of Your Deal-Breakers?
GiphyLast year, I wrote an article for the platform entitled, “Should Bad Sex Actually Be A Relationship Deal-Breaker?” The thing that I think needs to go on record about deal-breakers is they aren’t exactly standards that you have. No, a deal-breaker is something that can’t be worked out even after trying to negotiate or compromise. When it comes to relationships, a deal-breaker might be how long two people should date before becoming exclusive or getting engaged. Another deal-breaker might be if being religious is more important than being spiritual and how that manifests itself (church or no church, etc.). And yes, another deal-breaker may be what each other’s sexual needs and expectations are.
When someone is setting you up, it is imperative that they know about your standards. For instance, for me, I am not interested in dating a divorced person, pretty much ever (I Corinthians 7:10-11). I’ve had friends who have tried to hook me up with that demographic before and it has always been a moot effort. The fact that some of them have gotten frustrated with my convictions has absolutely nothing to do with me. Some have tried to get me to compromise my deal-breakers too — like a long-distance relationship. Is it a firm “naw”? No. However, it’s not really something that I am interested in, so why not just…recommend someone local?
Yeah, if someone thinks that they know you well enough to hook you up, they absolutely should be well-versed in what your deal-breakers are before they do. And if they’ve never asked, all they are doing is assuming — and we know what that typically means. LOL.
4. What Is Their Track Record?
GiphyIt’s kind of wild that we now live in a time when more couples meet online than they do through “old-fashioned ways” like via their friends (although some reports say that Gen Z is getting back to that) — and yet, here we are. Still, if you are willing to let someone play pseudo matchmaker in your life, you are well within your rights to inquire about their track record in that department. Have they hooked others up, successfully, before? Has any of their “Cupid work” caused both people to get exactly what they wanted out of the situation? If/when things went awry, why was that?
I know someone who is constantly trying to hook people up. Thing is, maybe 10-15 percent (no joke) of their efforts have proven to be positive and fruitful — and we’re talking about close to close to two decades of them doing it. Listen, time is too precious to be out here doing stuff ONLY to please other people. That said, if someone wants you to devote some time to one of their grand ideas, you are well within your rights to ask about their past and current success score when it comes to it.
5. Can They Keep Their Own Feelings Out of It?
GiphyWanna know if someone who is offering to do something for you is actually doing it more for themselves? If they try to make it be about them when things don’t go the way they would like, that is a dead ringer. An example? They post a message about you on social media and then question you about why you didn’t do the same thing in return. Another example? They do something for you and then throw it in your face during an argument. Still another example? They set you up with someone, it doesn’t work out, and suddenly you’ve put them in a weird spot. No dear — you put your own self in that position by trying to hook two people up in the first place.
I promise you, it will spare everyone unnecessary energy spent (or even drama experienced) if, before you agree to be hooked up, you get the matchmaker on record stating that they will keep their emotions out of it as much as possible. MEANING — they will do the introductions and then let the chips fall where they may. If they can’t do this, my two cents (save it or spend it) would be to decline the offer. Because all you need is someone texting you about why you haven’t called their cousin back or having an attitude with you when you break up with some guy at their church who they thought was the perfect catch (P.S. These aren’t hypothetical examples — LOL).
6. Will They Respect Your Boundaries? Start to Finish?
GiphyYeah, this final one is a biggie. Just because someone sets you up with another person, that doesn’t automatically or necessarily mean that they should have the right to the details of the dynamic. I don’t care if it’s the first date or the 10th date. I don’t care if you decide to just be sex buddies or to have a full-blown relationship. I don’t care if you stay together or break-up — it’s your relationship which makes it your business. Whatever you share is privileged data.
Yeah, I would say that probably the most challenging thing about being hooked up by someone you know is they have a tendency to think that they are a part of the relationship too — and that is a lie. If things go well beyond a couple of dates, you and the guy should discuss what you will both share with the person who introduced you and then agree to stick to that boundary, no matter what. It’s a great way to protect the dynamic, to keep “outside voices” from influencing the growth and to navigate how you want to move, moving forward.
Someone who hooked you up for the right reasons and knows how to honor limits? They will understand. Will they ask questions? Absolutely. Will they pry? Nah.
___
Should you sit and let someone hook you up? I mean, you never know how your blessing will come. Just make sure that they are prepared for you to do some digging into their mindset before they start sweetly meddling into your love life.
It’s only fair. Hell, and right. LOL.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by PeopleImages/Shutterstock