Sunday night was filled with watch parties, buzzing group chats, and never-ending social media posts all in celebration of the beginning of the end to HBO's Insecure. From debates surrounding friendship and relationships to healthy discussions around therapy, postpartum, and office culture, Insecure explored it all, and in a way that felt authentic and incredibly familiar. And while I'm a lover of many different types of television shows, I can honestly say Insecure is just different, special.
And I think I speak for a lot of us when I say as excited as I was for it to come back, I'm just as sad for its approaching end. But, if the first episode of season five is any indication of what's to come, they're definitely going out with a bang. And by that, I mean an emotional bang. Because this first episode was a lot to digest. By the way, I'm about to drop a lot of spoilers so if you haven't watched, head to HBO Max and then come back. But, for those of you that are caught up, here are some of our takeaways from the season five premiere episode.
1.Looking back helps you move forward.
There was something so uniquely beautiful about the cast going back to Stanford (Issa Rae's actual alma mater) for their 10-year reunion. It showed them in a way we kind of always imagined, walking through campus, talking, laughing, and making the memories that formed the relationships we've seen throughout the show. I also have to believe it served as a really good reminder of the things the characters may have previously wanted out of life and how some of those things may have changed while others stayed the same.
For example in this episode, Issa Dee commented on how since Tiffany and Derrick's first date, everyone knew they were a match. And now, here the married couple was walking together happily on the same campus. On the other hand, there's Issa who, while in school, thought she'd become a lawyer and open a firm with Molly, yet there she was excitedly waiting to speak on a panel about being an entrepreneur.
Sometimes looking back allows you to remember the things you wanted, celebrate the things you have, and re-evaluate what's next.
2.It's OK to take meaningful risks.
Issa admitting that she’s unsure if she’s on the right path is real AF.
— Shanelle Genai✨ (@shanellegenai) October 25, 2021
Like even with the best of planning, the reality is we’re all really just winging this shit.
Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t and we have to pivot. Whew.. #InsecureHBO
Pretty early in the episode, we learn that Issa has been flewed out, thanks to her alma mater, and is on a special panel to talk about her new company, BLOCC (Black Life Opportunity, Culture, and Connection). However, when she stutters over what the acronym stands for, it becomes apparent that she's still ironing out the kinks. Nevertheless, during the panel, she's asked many intimidating questions like, "What's the biggest lesson you learned on your journey?" and "When did you know you were on the right path?" And for a moment, we see Issa appear uncomfortable after making one of those awkward yet hilarious outbursts we've grown accustomed to hearing.
But, then she does something else, she shares a transparent truth, that's she's not sure that she's made the right decision and wonders if she's wasting her time. And while that response may not have been a hit with the panel audience, it resonates with Insecure's. Because, thanks to layoffs and toxic office cultures coupled with social media's need to appear like we have it all together, many Insecure viewers know all too well about having to change career paths. And there's something so freeing in embracing uncertainty and chasing true fulfillment.
3.Some bonds are forever.
As we know, Insecure always starts a lot of conversation. I mean, one of the best things about the episodes is the gender wars and Twitter threads that appear after they air. But, one pretty clear thing is that this show is full of passionate relationships. And I don't just mean romantically. Issa and Molly's friendship has been a highlight of the show, and when season five begins, we're not quite positive where they stand. I mean sure, they seem friendly, but they're supposed to be best friends.
Friendly isn't really a word I'd use to describe the chemistry between best friends, it's supposed to be much deeper and more comfortable, but the two are clearly putting forth an effort to fix it. However, when they're at gunpoint holding onto each other (thanks to that shady Cheyenne) and later belting out in laughter, it becomes apparent that they have a forever connection. That's how it is with some people. You can go a long time without talking or even suffer hurdles in the relationship, but you're still always going to care for them, and I think Issa and Molly are a really good example of that.
4.Friends can be your soulmates, too.
Kelli deserves all the validation because she actually is the best friend to all of them. #InsecureHBO
— stacey.cash (@staceynicole__) October 25, 2021
One of the things I really liked about this episode is that we learned even more about Kelli. Because while she's one of my favorite characters, I don't know as much about her as I do the others. And when the girls are in the car before all hell breaks loose, Kelli irritably shares an authentic truth: she feels like everyone only sees her as the "funny friend." And while the rest of the characters laugh, Tiffany looks at her sympathetically.
To me, that moment spoke to their relationship. Because sometimes when it seems that everyone else doesn't understand you, the person who truly gets you, always will. And at the end of the show when Tiffany verbalizes that emotion to the group by saying "she's my soulmate, sorry Derrick," as she apologizes to her husband, it was just a beautiful reminder of the people in my life I'm thankful for. And that sometimes, friends can be soulmates too.
5.Trust your gut.
They ain’t never gon just give us a happy & healthy Lawrence & Issa. It’s always something #InsecureHBO pic.twitter.com/oWpnayD7gI
— Queen Ky (@CurlyKeekz) October 25, 2021
Whew, this one was hard to type. Because I'm one of the people that is rooting for Issa and Lawrence to find their way back to each other. Now, I know it's been quite messy and he has a whole side baby now, but they clearly love each other! Still, if there's one thing this life has taught me, it's to trust your gut, intuition, or vibe – whatever you want to call it –it's there for a reason. And when Issa was riding in the car with Lawrence during that final scene, it was obvious there was something major she needed to get off her chest. And whether the decision to end things is temporary or permanent, it's good to know she trusted herself.
Who knows what would've happened if she stayed when she truly wanted to leave? Maybe she would have cheated on him again, maybe she would have ruined their relationship altogether, or even formed a wedge between him and his child. Now, I know that may have gone too far, but my point is it reminded me to always trust myself, even if it's difficult or uncomfortable to do so. Because you never know what the repercussions may be. Still, I hope they find their way back to each other.
But maybe she can grab dinner with Daniel before that because I'd like to see him on-screen one more time. (smiles)
Featured image by Giphy
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While speaking to xoNecole, Eva shares that she’s a lot like the beloved 1994 character in many ways. “Lyric is so me. She's the odd flower. A flower nonetheless, but definitely not a peony,” she tells us.
“She's not the average flower you see presented, and so she reminds me of myself. I'm a sunflower, beautiful, but different. And what I loved about her character then, and even more so now, is that she was very sure of herself.
"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Je-Caryous Johnson Entertainment
Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
Overall, Eva hopes that her contribution to the role and the play as a whole serves as motivation for others to reach for the stars.
“I want them to walk out with hope. I want them to re-vision their dreams. Whatever they were. Whatever they are. To re-see them and then have that thing inside of them say, ‘You know what? I'm going to do that. Whatever dream you put on the back burner, go pick it up.
"Whatever dream you've accomplished, make a new dream, but continue to reach for the stars. Continue to reach for what is beyond what people say we can do, especially as [a] Black collective but especially as Black women. When it comes to us and who we are and what we accept and what we're worth, it's not about having seen it before. It's about knowing that I deserve it.”
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
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Eldest Daughter Syndrome had its viral moment online last year, and for good reason. The term gave language to the silent pressures so many eldest daughters tend to carry as a result of their birth order. Beyond that very needed conversation, birth order as a whole can offer insight into not only our traits and tendencies, but also how we show up in life, love, and even our work.
Below, we’re breaking down the traits most commonly associated with each birth order. Keep reading to learn what your birth order might say about you.
If you are the oldest...
Let's be real, being the firstborn often comes with a lot of responsibility. And it's usually not by choice. From early on, they’re the ones who set the tone, carry the weight, and take on the title of "the responsible one." Because of that, they often grow into reliable, high-achieving adults. But the pressure of being "the blueprint" and the one to "lead by example" can also be a heavy burden to bear.
Oldest child traits may look like:
- Natural leaders that take charge even when they didn’t mean to (read: she's bossy, but keeping it cute)
- High standards (for yourself and everyone else)
- Motivated, goal-oriented, and always chasing that next accomplishment
- Reliable and conscientious
- Perfectionist tendencies that can lead to burnout
- Struggles with being controlling or micromanaging
- Often cautious, craving stability over spontaneity
- Finds it hard to rest or ask for help
If you are the middle child...
Season 2 Netflix GIF by Gilmore Girls GiphyIn the grand scheme of the birth order lineup, the middle child can be the quiet MVPs. As the child who falls in the order "in-between," they’re used to being the one who keeps the peace while also fighting to stand out. But being the “in-between” can also mean feeling overlooked or forgotten. In some families, especially ones with toxic dynamics, the middle child may even take on the role of the "black sheep," while their siblings are seen as the golden children. Still, despite (or maybe because of) that, middle children tend to thrive socially and can read a room like the back of their hand.
Middle child traits may include:
- Top-tier peacemakers who can smooth over almost any situation
- Adaptable and easygoing (even when they’re lowkey screaming inside)
- Often feel overlooked or like they have to do the most to be seen
- People-pleasers who put everyone else first
- Social butterflies and community-minded, with strong friendships outside the family
- Can be rebellious when they feel boxed in
- Thrive when they’re allowed to define success on their own terms
- The ultimate go-between, translating vibes between generations, personalities, and moods
If you are the youngest...
Season 1 Ff GIF by FreeformGiphyThe baby of the family walks through life knowing how to charm, persuade, and perform. They often grow up with more freedom and fewer expectations, which fuels their adventurous and carefree side. But that same freedom can sometimes lead to entitlement, or a tendency to seek validation by being the "fun one."
Youngest child traits might include:
- Social butterflies who light up a room and don’t mind the spotlight
- Natural charmers, funny, flirtatious, and usually down for anything
- Can be a little self-centered or attention-seeking (but you still love them for it)
- Tend to keep things uncomplicated… unless they’re not getting their way
- Known to be manipulative when trying to get what they want
- Free-spirited and bold in their choices
- Often underestimated, but capable of big things when they focus
- Thrive in spaces that let them express, explore, and be a little extra
If you are the only child...
High School Drama GIF by HBO MaxGiphyOnly children can be the ultimate "one woman show" as they are often a mix of all the birth orders rolled into one. Without siblings, they learn to entertain themselves, advocate for their needs, and navigate adult conversations early. That independence can make them magnetic, mature, and deeply introspective, but it also comes with a deep craving for validation and control.
Only child traits can include:
- Mature and wise beyond their years, often viewed as old souls
- Conscientious and responsible, usually the go-to person in their circle
- Seek approval and validation more than they let on
- Natural leaders with big ideas and even bigger plans
- Can be sensitive and deeply affected by criticism
- Prefer structure, routines, and control (sometimes to a fault)
- Like things done their way (and don’t love compromising)
- Thrive in solitude but still want to feel seen and celebrated
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