While we wait out this whole corona-thing, I'm doing my part to save the world by social distancing with my snacky snacks and catching up on Insecure's season 4. So far we're only two episodes into the long-awaited new season and Issa has already found herself in a situation.
awkward issa rae GIF by Insecure on HBOGiphy
Here's the rundown, filled with spoilers if you're already not caught up…
Issa unknowingly befriended Lawrence's new girlfriend, Condola and they started working closely together. Eventually, they realized that Issa's ex bae and Condola's new bae are the same bae, but they forge on with their work friendship sans the initial awkwardness. After addressing the elephant in the room aka cracking a few light-hearted jokes about Lawrence, it now seems like the two ladies may be forming a real friendship. Issa even goes as far to say, "I LOVE Condola!"
SN:Issa's bestie Molly made it clear that she thinks their "friendship" is a very bad idea.
Like I said, a situation. Since the relationship themes in the cult-show reflect our real-lives (you know, outside of quarantine) all too well, I wondered how I would handle this, well, situation. I hold my female friendships near and dear. Lucky for me, I tend to befriend folks easily, and often approach possible friendship matches like a pro Pokémon player—gotta catch 'em all. So, I'd try my best to not let a little thing like a guy get in the way. After all, one woman's ex is another woman's husband. But not all exes are the same. There's one very important factor to remember here: Issa and Lawrence were together for FIVE YEARS.
They lived together, experienced growth together and were (maybe still are) in love with each other. I was in a roller coaster of a relationship for seven years, and while I may have never accidentally befriended my ex's girlfriend, I would not knowingly venture down that road for sanity's sake. Put in Issa's shoes, I would keep the working relationship with Condola since it seems to be going well, but keep it moving in the other direction when it came to anything personal. I don't need a constant reminder of a relationship I said "thank you, next" to and unfortunately my new gal pal is too deeply intertwined with someone who was meant to stay in my past.
But that's just me! I avoid anything that has even the potential of drama to develop. However, I love to watch the messiness play out on-screen and will definitely pull up seat to hear juicy real-life tales that mimic Issa's. So, I reached out to Insecure fans to ask them:
Could you be friends with your ex's new bae?
"I’m Mature Enough To Handle It"
"I would def be friends with my ex's new bae. I think once you are a woman of a particular age, we don't have time for the childish games. Adults should be able to get along, be cordial and especially get money. My motto would be money over everything because the men will come and go. Also, he is an ex for a reason so sis HAVE AT HIM! That connection could be a divine one and letting ego and pettiness get in the way could burn the bridge. At the end of the day this all boils down to maturity. How mature are you to handle this? And as for me I believe I'm mature enough to handle it." –LaToya Newton, 40, TheAnalogGirl.com
"Don't Force It."
"If I meet a smart, kind woman and we get along, I consider that a win. If I come to find out she's my old bae's new bae, I still would be friendly, but the extent of our friendship will differ based on my comfort and friendship level with old bae. Sometimes relationships end and that's OK, but I don't want to be forced to hang out with someone I no longer want in my life." –Brittiany Cierra, 33, Founder, Cur8ted Media
"Possibly. Maybe. But I Need Boundaries."
"I guess it depends on how the relationship ended. If it was an amicable break-up, then I would consider, but there would be boundaries on how we conduct our friendship." –Kateri Fischer, On-Air Scheduling Coordinator
"We Could Be Friends. I Just Doubt We Would Be Friends."
"I could definitely be friends with my ex's new girlfriend. I haven't met an ex that I want back yet. Maybe some love lost, but never any hate gained. I honestly do come out of every relationship feeling as though I gave it my best, so I have zero regrets and few reservations in the end.
"Now, realistically, could my ex be friends with me? Let alone, could his new girl be friends with me? Doubt it. It's as simple as this. While I may have far fewer desire to have that old thang back, I can't say the same for all of my exes. That's not to boast or brag, that's just my truth. But I've noticed that, while I have a bit more control over my feelings (or lack thereof) post-breakup, that hasn't always been the case for my exes.
"With that said, there are way too many emotional factors on all ends to consider. The chances of everyone being on the same page, are slim to none." –Soraya "Sojo," Digital Director + Personality
"God Is Still Working On Me."
"I've never had a situation like this happen to me (thank God), but I'm pretty sure I would not be able to befriend my ex's new boo. Especially, if the ex and I were together for a significant amount of time (like Issa and Lawrence were). Truthfully, I'd have a hard-enough time getting to a place where l was cool with my ex again, so the new boo is a no-go. Kudos to the folks that are mature enough to handle something like this, because I most certainly am not. God is still working on me. (Laughs)" – Tiffany, 29, Fine Artist
"It Would Never Go Beyond A Surface Relationship."
"Honestly speaking, a friendship with my ex's new girlfriend would never be something I could start. The friendship wouldn't be genuine because I wouldn't want to discuss her relationship and she wouldn't feel comfortable confiding in me like she would with a friend. It would be a surface relationship, and those aren't worth even having if you can avoid them." –Kim C., 30, Marketing Manager
"Not Accepting Additional Soul Ties."
"...another woman's treasure right! (Laughs) I couldn't be friends. However, I would be super cordial. If I found out she was dating my ex like Issa did, I would make it work for the duration of the project; especially if she's a sweet person. However, my ex is my ex for a reason, and I don't need any additional soul ties." –Marie Lewis, Social Media Manager
"Wondering About Their Pillow Talk Would Drive Me Crazy."
"For me, it's a no. Not that we couldn't be cordial, but I don't want to consume my life with wondering what is being talked about during their pillow talk. Who wants to build a relationship with someone whose bae has a playbook to your love life? Just saying." –Tweety E., 20-Something, Writer
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Featured image via Insecure/HBO
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Your May 2025: A Monthly Overview
Gemini Season officially begins on May 20, and we enter air sign energy, which is good for communication, business, and coming up with inspiring and new ideas. On May 24, Saturn enters Aries, beginning its new transit where it will remain for the next few years. Saturn in Aries is bold, direct, and straightforward, but so are its lessons. There is a gift in resilience and finding your strength during this time, and this transit will show you where your power is, but it may challenge you to confront self-limiting behavior in the process.
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Article continues after the jump.
We Are/Getty ImagesMay 2025 Horoscopes for Every Zodiac Sign
Keep reading for your sun, moon, and rising sign below to see what May has in store for you.
ARIES
AriesKyra Jay for xoNecoleThe impact from April is finally behind you, and you get to move forward this month, Aries. After a month of retrogrades and Eclipses, you are starting to see the progress of what you have been working towards financially this year. The Sun is in your 2nd house of abundance, self-confidence, and values this month, and you are putting your dreams here first.
With Venus also in Aries for the entire month of May, you are feeling the support within and without this month, and this is a beautiful month unfolding.
On May 24, Saturn enters your sign, beginning its transit in Aries, which will last for the next few years. Saturn is the master of tough love, and you are going to be learning a lot about yourself during his time and going through a growth spurt. The New Moon of May is at the end of the month on May 26 and will be giving you the answers and clarity you have been looking for, highlighting open communication in your life. Overall, this is your month of fewer obstacles and more progress.
TAURUS
TaurusKyra Jay for xoNecoleTaurus Season is officially underway, and you are the main character right now, Taurus. Remember that. This month is about trusting your intuition and the timing of things, and knowing that things are working in your favor. With Venus, your ruling planet, in your 12th house for the month, you are seeking a lot of closure and culmination right now and are healing what was. Mercury enters your sign from May 10 until May 25, and it’s all about the perspectives you are gaining right now.
Don’t be afraid to ask the important questions and get down to the bottom of things that have been worrying you. On May 12, there is a Full Moon in your 7th house of partnership, and you are closing the door on what has not been working for you in love. You are seeing the clarity of what you need within your emotional world and how you want to navigate the changes you have been through here now.
GEMINI
GeminiKyra Jay for xoNecoleMay is a new beginning for you, Gemini. You have a lot of energy and vitality with you this month, and you are ready to accomplish some personal goals and intentions of yours. For most of the month, the Sun is in your house of closure and healing, and you are finding yourself rejuvenated from the transformations you have been through. Gemini Season officially begins on May 20, and with the Sun in your sign, nothing is holding you back from shining and living in your truth right now.
On May 25, Mercury enters Gemini until June 8, and Mercury loves being in your sign, as this is your planetary ruler.
Mercury in Gemini is forward-thinking, quick, and intelligent. You are coming up with solutions to previous challenges or obstacles, and overcoming something that has felt restrictive mentally. Before the month ends, there is a New Moon in Gemini on May 26, and this New Moon is one of the best times of the year for you to set your intentions and manifest your dreams. Remember you are worthy of what you are setting out to accomplish this month, Gemini.
CANCER
CancerKyra Jay for xoNecoleCancer, this month requires you to slow down, take care of your health, and allow things to come to fruition the way they are meant to. There is a chance you could be overthinking more than usual this month, and you are being reminded that there is only so much that is in your control, and to give yourself some more grace. The Full Moon in Scorpio on May 12 will help you gain a little more clarity of the heart and is going to be a time of feeling the love and appreciation in your life.
Saturn enters your 10th house of career on May 24, remaining here over the next few years, and you are getting an opportunity to grow and discover where you may have been limiting yourself professionally, socially, or within your aspirations in life. This time is all about reminding yourself that you deserve recognition for the work you do, but that you must also be the one believing in yourself as well. On May 12, there is a New Moon in your house of emotional healing, and you are seeing the gifts of alone time, safe spaces, and tending to your creative inklings at the end of the month.
LEO
LeoKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is an opportunity for a new beginning in love and progress within your emotional world, Leo. You are learning to trust your intuition more, and you are putting more of your energy into your heart’s desires. With the Sun in your 10th house for most of the month, you are shining in your truth and remaining confident in your goals in life.
Venus is in your house of adventure for the entire month, and this is a good time for experiencing romance while traveling or getting out of your comfort zone a little.
Saturn makes a significant move from Pisces into Aries at the end of the month and enters your 9th house. With Saturn here, you will be learning more about what mental growth and clarity mean to you, and this is a good time to dedicate yourself to higher education, traveling, gaining a new perspective, and honoring your integrity and values. The New Moon of the month is on May 26, creating magic within your friendships and community.
You are leaving this month with hope in your heart and new plans for the future.
VIRGO
VirgoKyra Jay for xoNecoleMay is a month of abundance and fruition for you, Virgo. Your dreams and intentions are coming to fruition, and you are owning that which you have created for yourself. With Venus in Aries, this is a good time for seeing support in your life financially, dedicating yourself to your commitments and responsibilities, and seeing the gifts in that. On May 12, there is a Full Moon in your 3rd house of communication, and this is an intuitive time for you, giving you the strength needed to close the chapter on what you don’t resonate with anymore.
On May 24, Saturn enters your house of shared finances, rebirth, intimacy, and resources, and over the next few years, you will be learning the importance of connecting with people who truly have your best interest at heart, and not committing to what feels unstable. Before the month ends, we have a New Moon in Gemini in your house of career, and this is a good time to manifest and set your intentions for where you want to see professional growth in your life.
Overall, May is about embracing your freedom while honoring the people and connections that help you grow and make you feel more secure in life.
LIBRA
LibraKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis is a month of feeling empowered and ready to take on anything that comes your way, Libra. You are inspired by the progress you are making in your life right now, and with Venus in your 7th house of love, you are being well-received. This is a month of finding your balance between your path and the growth of your relationships, and there is a sense of support, harmony, and love in your life in May.
You are owning your authenticity and living in your truth fully, and this energy is magnetic.
However, Saturn also enters your 7th house of love this month, where it will remain for the next few years. Saturn empowers and helps you grow, but you can also feel a little more challenged within your relationships during this time. The more you can own your wants and needs, the more you can find vulnerability and support within your relationships. On May 26, a New Moon in a fellow air sign occurs and happens in your 9th house, creating a chance at a new adventure and an opportunity to discover some new inspiration.
SCORPIO
ScorpioKyra Jay for xoNecoleMay is about believing in the impossible, Scorpio. It’s time to take a leap of faith in yourself and to remember your power. You are seeking a new beginning in your life, and with the Sun in your 7th house of love for most of the month, you are being supported and encouraged in the process. Pluto, one of your ruling planets, goes retrograde in your house of home and family from May 4 until October, and you are gaining clarity on the people and support systems you can rely on more.
The Full Moon of the month is in your sign on May 12, and this is the Flower Moon of the year. You are in full bloom and ready for whatever is next for you, and this is beautiful. Previous intentions and goals come to fruition for you overall in mid-May, and there is a lot to look forward to right now as you are getting excited about it all. Before the month ends, we have a New Moon in Gemini in your 8th house, creating a sense of empowerment through what you are looking to change and transform in your life right now.
This month is about not being afraid to take more risks and doing things your own way.
SAGITTARIUS
SagittariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleMay is a beautiful month of magic, success, and good fortune, Sagittarius. You are feeling lucky this month and are attracting success to you in many different areas of your life. Venus, the planet of love, is in your 5th house of romance for most of the month, and you are enjoying your life, feeling the love within your heart, and expressing yourself freely in May. You are a magnet for your manifestations, and dreams are coming true for you this month, Sag.
On May 12, we have a Full Moon happening in your house of endings and closure, and you are closing out a big chapter in your life this month.
You are letting go of old pain or emotional experiences and choosing not to repeat a pattern that left you feeling hopeless before. On May 26, we have a New Moon in your sister sign, Gemini, enhancing your need for love, connection, and relationship development this month. This is a great New Moon to set your intentions for what partnerships you want to see grow, heal, and come to fruition for you. Overall, May is your month of fruition, balance, and believing in the magic in your life.
CAPRICORN
CapricornKyra Jay for xoNecoleMay is about slowing down and allowing yourself to find the answers you have been looking for, Capricorn. This isn’t the time to rush your progress or doubt where you are in life. The Sun is in your 5th house, and this is good for finding more time for fun, pleasure, self-care, and asking your heart what it needs. With Pluto going retrograde in your 2nd house of values and income, you are being reminded to hold yourself with integrity and to know that you are worthy of the things you are asking for.
The Full Moon on May 12 is a beautiful time to connect with loved ones or those who inspire you. The universe wants to show you that you are not alone this month and that you deserve to live a life where you can enjoy yourself more and manifest your dreams, rather than believing everything needs to be a challenge to be worthy. Saturn, your ruling planet, then enters your 4th house of home and family, and over the next few years, you are going to be rediscovering what home means to you.
AQUARIUS
AquariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleYour guidance for May is to trust that what is falling from your life or changing for you is doing so for your benefit, Aquarius. Trust that what is happening is happening for you and not to you, and don’t doubt that you will rebuild from this. With Pluto going retrograde in your sign from May 4 until October 13, you need a break from some of the confusion you have been feeling in your personal life, and you are getting a chance to gain a new perspective this month.
Use this time to get inspired by change rather than let it bring you down, and ground yourself in the present moment more.
Saturn enters Aries in May, where it will remain for the next few years, helping you grow in the areas of your life that have to do with communication, networking, transportation, siblings, and education. You will be learning a lot during this time and will be finding new outlets for self-expression and communication. Before the month ends, we have a New Moon in Gemini occurring in your 5th house of romance, pleasure, hobbies, and entertainment, and after a month of navigating endings, changes, and closures, you are ready for a fresh start and are receiving one in love now.
PISCES
PiscesKyra Jay for xoNecoleAllow what is to be, be, Pisces. May is a month of allowing yourself to trust the timing of the universe and not giving up hope that things are going to turn out beautifully for you. On May 12, there is a Full Moon in fellow water sign, Scorpio, and this is a time to get inspired and see the benefits of closure. This Full Moon is about gaining a new perspective and not doubting what is clearer to you now, that you are worthy of a new beginning.
On May 24, Saturn moves into your 2nd house of income, and you are going to be moving through a journey of developing financially, and working on maintaining stability while building new foundations in your life. The New Moon in Gemini at the end of the month is about setting your intentions for your home and family life and creating some new energy here. Overall, May is your month of breaking ground on the things you want to create for yourself and trusting the timing of how things are unfolding.
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Featured image by Kyra Jay for xoNecole
