Boris Kodjoe Knew Nicole Ari Parker Was 'The One'—Even When She Was Married To Someone Else

Nicole Ari Parker and Boris Kodjoe are the epitome of Black Hollywood love goals, blending romance, resilience, and partnership into a bond that has stood the test of time. From their serendipitous meeting on the set of Soul Food to nearly two decades of marriage, the couple's love story is one of mutual respect, unwavering support, and undeniable chemistry.
Boris opened up about their “meet-cute” while chatting with Jemele Hill on her podcast Jemele Unbothered. The Austrian-born German actor always knew it was Nicole for him. Boris told Jemele, “I knew she was my person, but she was still struggling a little bit because she was like, ‘Yeah, you know, he’s a model, blah, blah. He’s an actor, blah, blah.’ She was trying to tell herself I’m not the one, but I knew, I knew.”
One new fun fact we learned was that Nicole was married and Boris was also in a relationship. That didn’t bother Boris though because when you know, you know.
“It started getting tricky when the second year, second season [of Soul Food], I think, when the whole entire crew was over us. The whole crew was like, ‘Y’all mfs, you better get that together because we know. Are you guys blind?’”
He went on to say, “Then one day I walked in a trailer and I said to her, ‘By the way, we are gonna be married with two kids one day.’ And I just walked out. That didn’t go over very well. She was mad. She was mad for three weeks. But think about it—why was she mad though? Why was she mad? Because she was right. If it was just a joke to her, she would’ve just laughed and moved on.”
They decided to take a break from each other over the summer after Soul Food wrapped. But the universe had other plans, just two weeks later, they found themselves working together again on the set of Brown Sugar in New York.
Together, they’ve navigated parenthood, launched business ventures, and become advocates for health and wellness, all while keeping their connection strong. Their journey is a beautiful reminder that true love thrives on teamwork, trust, and a shared vision for the future.

The 'Soul Food' cast members in 2000: Darrin Henson, Rockmond Dunbar, (back row) Boris Kodjoe, Nicole Ari Parker, Vanessa Williams, (middle row) Malinda Williams and Aaron Meeks (foreground)
Ken Hively/Los Angeles Times via Getty Images
2000:
First Meeting: Nicole Ari Parker and Boris Kodjoe met on the set of the Showtime series Soul Food, where they played on-screen love interests. Their chemistry both on- and off-screen sparked a real-life romance. During his interview with Jemele Hill, he said, “When I first got there, I was the newbie. It was my first job. Super excited, super nervous. And she was unbelievable—actress on stage, movies, TV, everything. But she really embraced me. She was super nice to me. I remember that—super heartwarming and nice.”
He continued, “She really helped me a lot—breaking down the scripts, explaining to me what was going on. I had a million questions. When I read the script, half the stuff I didn’t understand, right? Because there were colloquialisms, there were references to old TV shows that I’d never seen in my life. So I would always come to her and ask her about certain things that I was supposed to say, and I didn’t know what it meant.”
2005:
Engagement: Boris proposed to Nicole, marking a significant step in their relationship.
Marriage: The couple tied the knot on May 21, 2005, in an intimate ceremony in Gundelfingen, Germany, Boris's homeland. Kodjoe and Parker exchanged vows in his hometown of Gundelfingen, Germany, in 2005 at a 900-year-old venue. They told People, “We walked from the church to his Oma's house, and it was literally like we were Hansel and Gretel. I thought I was in a storybook.” The newlyweds arrived at the church in a horse and carriage donning traditional German garb.
First Child: The couple welcomed their first child, Sophie Tei-Naaki Lee Kodjoe, who was born with spina bifida. Her condition inspired their advocacy for health awareness.
2006:
Advocacy Work: Boris and Nicole became active in raising awareness about spina bifida and supporting families with children who have special needs. “We have gone through so many different emotional levels with Sophie,” Boris told PEOPLE. “We had the fear of her dying to paralysis. All kinds of different monsters attacked us.” The couple's personal journey led them to establish the Sophie's Voice Foundation.
The organization's mission is to increase awareness about spina bifida and generate financial support for a groundbreaking new surgical procedure trial.
2007:
Second Child: Their son, Nicolas Neruda Kodjoe, was born, completing their family. In 2015, Boris celebrated his baby boy on Instagram saying, “You brighten up the sky for us every single day. When God sought me out to be your dad he blessed me with so much love and light. I'm honored and excited to be in your presence and to witness the evolution of Nico.”
2010s:
Power Couple Status: Nicole and Boris became known as a Hollywood power couple, balancing their thriving careers with family life and public appearances. They often shared insights into their marriage and parenting on social media and in interviews. The Real House Husbands of Hollywood alum shared this advice, “[Treat] your wife like she's still your girlfriend. You have to water the plant every day, not just once a week. [Give her] surprises, little gifts, notes, texts, flowers. Just little things, but do them consistently."

Nicole Ari Parker and Boris Kodjoe in 2010.
Jean Baptiste Lacroix/WireImage
2015:
10th Wedding Anniversary: The couple celebrated a decade of marriage, frequently sharing their gratitude for each other in public forums.
To celebrate, Nicole shared a love letter in German (that we have translated in English) to her forever love:
You are EVERYTHING
Corinthians said it would be.
Patient
Kind
Free of envy
Does not boast
Humble
Not easily angered
Keeping no record of wrongs.
You protect, trust and persevere.
You are EVERYTHING your fans think you are.
Ridiculously fine.
With clothes.
Without.
Takes care of his kids.
Good to his wife.
Respects his Mama.
Handles his business.
You are EVERYTHNG I ever hoped for
Strong.
Deep.
Kind.
Connected to his Spirit.
Funny.
Smells good. (heyy)
Travel companion
Focused on what matters.
Provider.
Good father.
King.
Together we have filled a decade with
Laughter and adventure,
Tears and trials,
Kids and chaos,
Deep connections and communication breakdowns,
Fried Chicken and schnitzel…
Holding each other up and having each other’s back all along the way.
I am so blessed to call you my husband for these past 10 years
and I am so ready for 10 more.
Truly, Madly, Deeply, Your Nicole.
2018:
Fitness Venture: Nicole and Boris launched KOFIT, a wellness app focused on fitness and healthy living, showcasing their shared passion for holistic health. Nicole and Boris Kodjoe's fitness app aims to help families prioritize health and wellness without sacrificing precious time. The app offers quick and easy exercises and meditations that can be completed in as little as five minutes per day, making it accessible for busy families.
The app features instructional videos led by the fit couple themselves, along with contributions from Boris' brother Pat, a certified personal trainer, and his wife, a seasoned yoga practitioner. The Kodjoe-Parker children also make appearances in the app, adding a fun and engaging element for families to enjoy together.
2019:
In a 2019 interview with PEOPLE, Nicole Ari Parker and Boris Kodjoe expressed their admiration for each other. “He's exactly who his persona is, kind, loves being a husband and father. An incredible human being who thinks of others. He's just authentically good.” Boris added, "She's drop-dead, smashingly gorgeous and sexy. She's intelligent. She's confident. The fact that she's so comfortable with who she is, that to me is everything."

Nicole Ari Parker, Boris Kodjoe, and family in 2019.
Rachel Murray/Getty Images for City Year Los Angeles
2020:
Lockdown Life: During the COVID-19 pandemic, the couple’s humorous social media posts about their relationship resonated with fans. Nicole jokingly complained about Boris not flirting with her, sparking a viral discussion about romance in long-term marriages.
2022:
Marriage Wisdom: They shared their secrets with Ebony to keeping the spark alive in their relationship after nearly two decades, emphasizing communication, mutual respect, and adaptability. The couple attributes “kissing for no reason, surprise daycations, and spiritual check-ins” as tried-and-true tips for keeping the fire alive in your relationship throughout all of the chaos.
2023:
In February 2023, the couple revitalized Gymwrap, Parker's athleisure brand. Originally conceived by the actress years prior as a solution for workout headbands, the brand has since expanded under Parker and Kodjoe's leadership to include a wider range of accessories, jackets, tops, and leggings.
"I admire her and her brain for how creative she is and the ideas that she comes up with. I'm in awe when I just watch her navigate these kinds of environments," Boris shared with PEOPLE. The family collaborated to relaunch the brand, with Sophie contributing her production and photography skills.
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Featured image by Kevin Tachman/amfAR/Getty Images for amfAR
Because We Are Still IT, Girl: It Girl 100 Returns
Last year, when our xoNecole team dropped our inaugural It Girl 100 honoree list, the world felt, ahem, a bit brighter.
It was March 2024, and we still had a Black woman as the Vice President of the United States. DEI rollbacks weren’t being tossed around like confetti. And more than 300,000 Black women were still gainfully employed in the workforce.
Though that was just nineteen months ago, things were different. Perhaps the world then felt more receptive to our light as Black women.
At the time, we launched It Girl 100 to spotlight the huge motion we were making as dope, GenZennial Black women leaving our mark on culture. The girls were on the rise, flourishing, drinking their water, minding their business, leading companies, and learning to do it all softly, in rest. We wanted to celebrate that momentum—because we love that for us.
So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.

In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.

In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.

And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.

We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.

So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.

That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.

This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
Featured image by xoStaff
These Black Women Left Their Jobs To Turn Their Wildest Dreams Into Reality
“I’m too big for a f***ing cubicle!” Those thoughts motivated Randi O to kiss her 9 to 5 goodbye and step into her dreams of becoming a full-time social media entrepreneur. She now owns Randi O P&R. Gabrielle, the founder of Raw Honey, was moving from state to state for her corporate job, and every time she packed her suitcases for a new zip code, she regretted the loss of community and the distance in her friendships. So she created a safe haven and village for queer Black people in New York.
Then there were those who gave up their zip code altogether and found a permanent home in the skies. After years spent recruiting students for a university, Lisa-Gaye Shakespeare became a full-time travel influencer and founded her travel company, Shakespeare Agency. And she's not alone.
These stories mirror the experiences of women across the world. For millions, the pandemic induced a seismic shift in priorities and desires. Corporate careers that were once hailed as the ultimate “I made it” moment in one's career were pushed to the back burner as women quit their jobs in search of a more self-fulfilling purpose.
xoNecole spoke to these three Black women who used the pandemic as a springboard to make their wildest dreams a reality, the lessons they learned, and posed the question of whether they’ll ever return to cubicle life.
Answers have been edited for context and length.
xoNecole: How did the pandemic lead to you leaving the cubicle?
Randi: I was becoming stagnant. I was working in mortgage and banking but I felt like my personality was too big for that job! From there, I transitioned to radio but was laid off during the pandemic. That’s what made me go full throttle with entrepreneurship.
Gabrielle: I moved around a lot for work. Five times over a span of seven years. I knew I needed a break because I had experienced so much. So, I just quit one day. Effective immediately. I didn’t know what I was going to do, I just knew I needed a break and to just regroup.
Lisa-Gaye: I was working in recruiting at a university and my dream job just kind of fell into my lap! But, I never got to fully enjoy it before the world shut down in March [2020] and I was laid off. On top of that, I was stuck in Miami because Jamaica had closed its borders due to the pandemic before I was able to return.

Randi O
xoN: Tell us about your journey after leaving Corporate America.
Randi: I do it all now! I have a podcast, I’m an on-air talent, I act, and I own a public relations company that focuses on social media engagement. It’s all from my network. When you go out and start a business, you can’t just say, “Okay I’m done with Corporate America,” and “Let me do my own thing.” If you don’t build community, if you don’t build a network it's going to be very hard to sustain.
Gabrielle: I realized in New York, there was not a lot to do for Black lesbians and queer folks. We don’t really have dedicated bars and spaces so I started doing events and it took off. I started focusing on my brand, Raw Honey. I opened a co-working space, and I was able to host an NYC Pride event in front of 100,000 people. I hit the ground running with Raw Honey. My events were all women coming to find community and come together with other lesbians and queer folks. I found my purpose in that.
Lisa-Gaye: After being laid off, I wrote out all of my passions and that’s how I came up with [my company] Shakespeare Agency. It was all of the things that I loved to do under one umbrella. The pandemic pulled that out of me. I had a very large social media following, so I pitched to hotels that I would feature them on my blog and social media. This reignited my passion for travel. I took the rest of the year to refocus my brand to focus solely on being a content creator within the travel space.

Gabrielle
xoN: What have you learned about yourself during your time as an entrepreneur?
Randi: [I learned] the importance of my network and community that I created. When I was laid off I was still keeping those relationships with people that I used to work with. So it was easy for me to transition into social media management and I didn’t have to start from scratch.
Gabrielle: The biggest thing I learned about myself was my own personal identity as a Black lesbian and how much I had assimilated into straight and corporate culture and not being myself. Now, I feel comfortable and confident being my authentic self. Now, I'm not sacrificing anything else for my career. I have a full life. I have friends. I have a social life. And when you are happy and have a full quality of life, I feel like [I] can have more longevity in my career.
Lisa-Gaye: [I'm doing] the best that I've ever done. The discipline that I’m building within myself. Nobody is saying, ‘Oh you have to be at work at this time.’ There’s no boss saying, ‘Why are you late?’ But, if I’m laying in bed at 10 a.m. then it's me saying [to myself], 'Okay, Lisa, get up, it's time for you to start working!’ That’s all on me.
xoNecole: What mistakes do you want to help people avoid when leaving Corporate America?
Randi: You have to learn about the highs and lows of entrepreneurship. You have a fast season and a slow season and I started to learn that when you're self-employed the latter season hits hard. Don't get caught up on the lows, just keep going and don't stop. I’m glad I did.
Gabrielle: I think everyone should quit their job and just figure it out for a second. You will discover so much about yourself when you take a second to just focus on you. Your skill set will always be there. You can’t be afraid of what will happen when you bet on yourself.
Lisa-Gaye: When it comes to being an influencer the field is saturated and a lot of people suffer from imposter syndrome. There is nothing wrong with being an imposter but find out how to make it yours, how to make it better. If you go to the store, you see 10 million different brands of bread! But you are choosing the brand that you like because you like that particular flavor.
So be an imposter, but be the best imposter of yourself and add your own flair, your own flavor. Make the better bread. The bread that you want.

Lisa-Gaye Shakespeare
xoNecole: Will you ever return to your 9 to 5?
Randi: I wouldn’t go back to Corporate America. But I don’t mind working under someone. A lot of people try to get into this business saying, “I can't work under anyone.” That’s not necessarily the reason to start a business because you're always going to answer to somebody. Clients, brands, there’s always someone else involved.
Gabrielle: I went back! I really needed a break and I gave myself that. But, I realized I’m a corporate girl, [and] I enjoy the work that I do. I’m good at it and I really missed that side of myself. I have different sides of me and my whole identity is not Raw Honey or my queerness. A big side of me is business and that’s why I love having my career. Now I feel like my best self.
Lisa-Gaye: I really don’t. For right now, I love working for myself. It's gratifying, it's challenging, it's exciting. It’s a big deal for me to say I own my own business. That I am my own boss, and I'm a Black woman doing it.
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Featured image courtesy of Lisa-Gaye Shakespeare
Originally published on February 6, 2023







