

If there are two things that I thought would slow down once I hit 45, it was menstrual cycles and body acne. But nope—my periods still run like clockwork and, it's fairly common for me to get a couple of zits on my back and shoulders once a month. Well, it's common if I'm not proactive in taking measures to make sure that I don't experience any breakouts.
I must admit that eating less dairy, getting more rest and washing with sulfur soap have done wonders to keep pimples at bay. But there are a few other all-natural intricate things that I've added to my skincare regimen that has definitely made it more difficult for acne—and the scars that they typically leave behind—to pop up on any part of my body.
If you've got body acne bouts that have been getting on your very last nerve, here's what you should definitely try out.
1. Make Your Own Soap
Black soap. Sulfur soap. Off top, those are two soaps that I can definitely vouch for when it comes to gently-yet-effectively treating body acne. But something else that I'm a fan of is making my own soap, because I can customize what works for me and what doesn't. An herbal soap recipe that will definitely give your breakouts a run for their money is a soap that contains neem, palm, tea tree and peppermint essential oils.
You can get the recipe here. Just make sure to moisturize your skin after using it with something like shea butter, grapeseed oil, sweet almond oil or pure Aloe Vera gel to reduce any risk of inflammation. It's a great recipe but it is also a pretty potent one.
2. Apply an Apple Cider Vinegar Spritz
It really is another article for another time, all of the things that apple cider vinegar can do; one of them is kill the bacteria that causes acne. It's able to do that because of all of the acids that are in it—acetic, citric, lactic and succinic acid. The key is to use the kind of apple cider vinegar that has the mother in it (like Braggs) and dilute it with water (because it's very strong!). Do this by mixing one-part vinegar with three-parts water. I think it's best to put it in a spritz bottle; that way, you can spray it directly onto your skin.
Just make sure to close your eyes when you do (vinegar can burn) and that you do it 30 minutes for going out. That will give the stench of the vinegar time to go away.
3. Heal Scars with Frankincense Essential Oil
I think the thing that I hate the most about body acne is, no matter how well I treat it, some sort of mark is going to be left behind. Ugh. Just ugh. I will say that my skin heals pretty quickly (scars fade within three weeks or so), but that doesn't mean that a well-placed acne scar doesn't sometimes dictate what I will or will not wear.
If that is your dilemma, frankincense oil has got your back (pun intended). Personally, I like the scent of the combination of frankincense and myrrh, so I definitely have no problem applying this to my skin in order to treat acne scars. Matter of fact, I recommend applying the combo. Myrrh will help to detox your skin, and frankincense is able to soften up scar tissue so that it is less obvious. Something else that is cool about frankincense oil is it contains anti-inflammatory properties, is able to increase the growth of new skin cells and it contains a property called farnesol that will improve your skin's elasticity too.
4. Nix Foods That Have a High Glycemic Index (GI) and a High Glycemic Load (GL)
There is a whole science behind this part of the conversation, but probably the best way to put it is there are certain kinds of foods that kick our sebum production (natural oil in our system that can sometimes clog our pores and cause acne) into overdrive. More sebum, more clogged pores. More clogged pores, more acne.
What kind of foods make the list? Sweet cereals, instant cereals, all-things-white (white pasta, white rice, white bread, white potatoes, etc.), and all-things-dairy too. Also, foods that you are sensitive to that can lead to inflammation should be avoided, along with whey protein and dried fruit because they trigger your insulin levels which can also cause acne.
5. Take Some Milk Thistle
Ever since I was in my 20s, I've had relatives who wanted me to add the supplement milk thistle to my diet. I didn't listen, but I should have because it really has done wonders for the quality of my health. Milk thistle is a flowering plant that is located in Mediterranean countries. For years, people have used it to treat jaundice, hepatitis, reduce cholesterol and insulin resistance, boost immunity and even stop the spread of certain types of cancer.
I use it because it also has a great reputation for detoxifying the liver and promoting skin health. It makes sense how the two work hand in hand because, the less toxins that are in your body, the less acne that tends to pop up. (Milk thistle also contains antioxidant and anti-aging properties as well.)
6. Drink Some Kefir
Kefir is fermented milk; it's kind of like buttermilk. So yeah, it's not necessarily the best-tasting thing in the world. And before you even say that you'll bypass its taste by eating yogurt instead, here's the thing about that—yogurt is fermented bacteria while kefir is fermented bacteria and yeast. Because it contains both, drinking kefir on a consistent basis will keep your blood sugar under control, keep your gut health on track, make you less lactose intolerant, help to heal vaginal and yeast infections and also reduce your breakouts.
On the breakout tip, it does that by healing your stomach and your skin with the probiotic lactoferrin. It works so well that one study reveals that drinking a glass of kefir, on a daily basis, can reduce acne lesions by as much as 39 percent (over a four-month period).
7. Dry Brush (or Use Exfoliating Gloves)
Clogged pores are what lead to breakouts, and one of the main causes of pore blockage are dead skin cells. Since our skin sheds a whopping 30,000 cells a day, due to the sebum and dirt that also sticks to our skin, it's important to exfoliate it too. You can do this by dry brushing (which is also an effective way to reduce the appearance of cellulite) or by putting on those cute exfoliating gloves that you should even be able to find at your local grocery store. Both of these will loosen up the dead skin on your body so that the cells will wash off instead of clogging up your pores.
8. Try Some Cinnamon
There really isn't too much that cinnamon isn't good for. It fights heart disease, reduces inflammation, decreases menstrual discomfort, fights infections and viruses, helps to prevent candida and yep, it's also really good for your skin. Due to the powerful antibiotic and antimicrobial properties found in cinnamon powder and oil (especially if you mix it with a little bit of raw honey), cinnamon can keep rashes, skin allergies and also acne at bay.
The reason why it works so well in the acne department is because it contains properties that are able to kill the acne-causing bacteria P. acnes. Just make a paste out of cinnamon and water or cinnamon water and honey. Apply it directly onto your pimples (it's best if they aren't ones that you have popped; cinnamon is strong and could irritate those), and let the paste sit for 15 minutes. If you do this three times a week, you should see a significant difference within seven days or so.
9. Take Off Your Bra When You Get Home
For the most part, I work from home. Because I wear anywhere from a GG to an H bra (depending on where I buy it), this means that I usually don't have a bra on. This also means that whenever I go out and put one on, there is a part of me that can't wait to get back home, just to take that bad boy off.
Sometimes, depending on what the weather is like outside, I will notice a pimple or two, right in the spots that my bra was covering. I know what's causing it—sweat and my skin's inability to breathe as much as it would like to. This is why it's important to wash your bras (every couple of weeks is fine) using a detergent that has as few chemicals as possible. It's also a good idea to get professionally fitted for a bra on an annual basis (because your shoulder straps should not be digging into your skin, which could also potentially lead to breakouts). And yes, so that your skin can feel free again, take your bra off as soon as you walk through your front door. (Spraying a little witch hazel onto your shoulders and back can't hurt either!)
10. Change Your Sheets Regularly
I'm hoping that you change your bedding every week, just like your mama made you do back when you were little. But if you do happen to skimp on that sometimes, here's a blaring reminder of how important it is to do. 6-8 hours of your life, every night, is spent in bed. This means that some of the dead skin cell shedding that we talked about earlier? Yeah, it happens, right in the midst of you catching some much needed zzz's. By changing your sheets, it helps to keep the cells from clinging to your pores. If you sleep naked, that's even better, because you won't sweat as much; that will reduce your chances for back and shoulder breakouts even more. Sweet dreams!
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
What Your Breakouts Could Be Telling You About Your Health
7 Natural Remedies For Hormonal Acne
6 Ways To Unclog Your Pores & Minimize Breakouts
This Is Why Your Skincare Routine Isn't Working
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Devale Ellis On Being A Provider, Marriage Growth & Redefining Fatherhood
In this candid episode of the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker talked with Devale Ellis, actor, social media personality, and star of Zatima, about modern masculinity, learning to be a better husband, emotional presence in marriage, fatherhood for Black men, and leading by example.
“I Wasn’t Present Emotionally”: Devale Ellis on Marriage Growth
Devale Ellis On Learning He Was a ‘Bad Husband’
Ellis grew up believing that a man should prioritize providing for his family. “I know this may come off as misogynistic, but I feel like it’s my responsibility as a man to pay for everything,” he said, emphasizing the wise guidance passed down by his father. However, five years into his marriage to long-time partner Khadeen Ellis, he realized provision wasn’t just financial.
“I was a bad husband because I wasn’t present emotionally… I wasn’t concerned about what she needed outside of the resources.”
Once he shifted his mindset, his marriage improved. “In me trying to be of service to her, I learned that me being of service created a woman who is now willing to be of service to me.”
On Redefining Masculinity and Fatherhood
For Ellis, “being a man is about being consistent.” As a father of four, he sees parenthood as a chance to reshape the future.
“Children give you another chance at life. I have four different opportunities right now to do my life all over again.”
He also works to uplift young Black men, reinforcing their worth in a world that often undermines them. His values extend to his career—Ellis refuses to play roles that involve domestic violence or sexual assault.
Watch the full episode below:
On Marriage, Family Planning, and Writing His Story
After his wife’s postpartum preeclampsia, Ellis chose a vasectomy over her taking hormonal birth control, further proving his commitment to their partnership. He and Khadeen share their journey in We Over Me, and his next book, Raising Kings: How Fatherhood Saved Me From Myself, is on the way.
Through honesty and growth, Devale Ellis challenges traditional ideas of masculinity, making his story one that resonates deeply with millennial women.
For the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker peels back the layers of masculinity with candid conversations that challenge stereotypes and celebrate vulnerability. Real men. Real stories. Real talk.
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
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6 Tabletop Sex Positions That'll Unlock You & Bae's Most Primal Desires
Something I will never tire of is finding new ways to bring new layers to intimacy. A wall you use as momentum, a bathroom sink to help you keep your balance as he worships you on his knees, a shower that is usually for cleansing but evolves into a sacred ritual of shared intimacy.
My favorite kind of sex is the kind of sex that prioritizes pleasure and connection. So, technically and thankfully, I can say most of my sex life has been quite pleasurable throughout the years. But the memorable encounters for sure take the cake. One such encounter actually took place on a kitchen counter, and with it unleashed inhibitions in ways I never anticipated while unlocking levels to top-tier sex. And that, that involved a kitchen counter.
Why Kitchen Counter Sex Just Hits Different
What is it about having your hips pressed into the edge of a kitchen counter that lets out something so primal in you? The cool-to-the-touch feel of the countertop against exposed skin as you rise to meet him again and again. The urgency in every movement. The playfulness of repurposing an everyday space for something far more erotic. If you’re looking to bring that energy into your own sex life, keep reading for positions and tips to explore.
1. The Bounce House
They don’t call it Bounce House for nothing. In this position, the penetrating partner lies flat on their back on a sturdy table or counter while the receiving partner straddles them, knees bent and facing away. With their hands gripping the edge of the surface for support, the receiving partner slides or bounces at their own pace, owning the rhythm, the motion, and the view.
According to sex therapist Michael Aaron, Ph.D., who spoke with Women’s Health, the receiving partner placing their legs between their partner’s creates a tighter sensation, while staying fully astride allows for more bounce and range of motion. Either way, this one puts the receiver in full control, and you know we love a good woman on top position. Pleasure and power? Say less.
2. The Bicycle
Well, you know what they say about riding a bike. In the case of this table top position, it's the receiving partner who is the rider...but not in the way you think. While lying back on a sturdy surface or a table, the receiver will bring their knees toward their chest, bending them as if in a cycling motion. The penetrating partner stands at the edge of the surface, grabbing the receiver's ankles, and guides themselves inside, slowly so as to savor the moment. This angle puts everything on display for the penetrating partner while allowing for deep, connected thrusting for the receiver.
To take things up a notch , the receiving partner can touch themselves or flex their thighs to control the depth or the rhythm. Because, who says only one person gets to have control?
3. Counter Offer
How could we be at the table and not use it to eat? Enter: Counter Offer. In this oral-focused sex position, the receiving partner perches on the edge of a counter or table, lying back or sitting upright with legs parted or bent for comfort. The penetrating partner kneels or stands between their thighs, depending on the setup and the kind of attention they’re ready to give. No doubt, this one’s all about access and intention.
With the vulva front and center, the height makes it easier to maintain eye contact, use hands freely for things like breast play or incorporating toys, and take their time with every moan-inducing taste. And that’s on five, six, seven, ATE.
4. Standing Doggy
Standing Doggy is what happens when a classic like doggy style gets an upgrade. Instead of being on all fours on a bed, the receiving partner bends over a hard surface like a table or counter, keeping their hips aligned at its edge. The penetrating partner stands behind and enters from the back, using the angle to go deeper and create a strong, steady rhythm. This one offers maximum control and visual appeal, especially if the penetrating partner reaches around for a little extra clitoral stimulation throughout thrusting.
This angle can get intense quickly, so bonus points if the receiving partner engages their pelvic floor muscles or shifts their weight to adjust how the pressure hits, especially if your goal is to hit that G-spot sweet spot.
5. Top Shelf
Men's Healthcalls this one "Yourself on the Shelf," but we like to call it "Top Shelf" because it's giving full view, full grip, and climax potential that's hard to top. The receiving partner sits on the edge of a sturdy table or counter while the penetrating partner stands in front of them and slowly slides in, thrusting while keeping them in position. From there, legs can wrap around their waist, arms can encircle their back, and the closeness at peak ecstasy? Chef's kiss.
If you have the core strength, add lifting to the menu for the final strokes leading to orgasm. Otherwise, allow the surface to the heavy lifting and enjoy the pleasure.
6. The Thumper
What better way to remind yourself that you're both the snack and the entrée than with a little tableside service courtesy of The Thumper? This position has the receiving partner kneeling on a sturdy table or counter (keyword: sturdy), hands gripping the edge or braced in front for support. The penetrating partner can then either kneel behind them (if there's room for two), or stay anchored on the ground with both feet planted on the floor (similar to the previously mentioned Standing Doggy). It all depends on the mood.
Kneeling on the table offers just the right amount of leverage for deep, steady strokes. The receiving partner can play with tightness by either keeping their knees closer together for a snug grip, or open their knees wider to invite more access, depth, and stretch. The Thumper is versatile that way, and the most important thing? The receiver gets to be the main course. Yum.
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