"I wish I could be a housewife," one of my best friends said when I told her about my new journey as a full-time freelance writer.
I had to check her in the nicest way possible and let her know working from home is not as convenient or as glamorous as it looks. Sometimes it's actually more difficult than getting up and going to a job. While working from home has this appeal that automatically brings a level of envy from most people working a traditional 9-5, there are certainly good, bad, and ugly factors about the reality of it. The work-from-home concept is becoming more common and as someone who is fresh to the game, I feel like I have a responsibility to share my experience so far.
Let Freedom & Flexibility Ring
One of the most obvious benefits of working from home is the flexibility and freedom to set the tone for your day. Being able to set your own hours is nothing short of a win, whether you're working in freelance or full-time for a major company. I will say, sleeping in from time to time, eating lunch when I get good and ready, and even watching TV or a movie while I work (most of the time in my pajamas) is certainly one of the more positive sides of working from home, and probably what makes it appear to be super easy all the time. After all, it's one of the main reasons people like to go this route to begin with.
Without Discipline, You're Screwed
Even though the flexibility of working from home is nothing short of amazing, without discipline, it really doesn't matter, and you're much less likely to actually fulfill your maximum work potential and level of productivity. I would recommend setting a schedule and sticking to it. It's kind of a catch-22 because having the coveted flexibility can be a blessing and a curse when you're doing your own thing. As a freelance writer, I've found what works best for me is getting up as if I'm going to a job outside of my home. I might not always get dressed but it definitely makes a difference when I set my alarm and set hours that I want to write, when I want to take a break, and when I'll wrap up for the day.
It Could Throw Off With Your Work-Life Balance
Working from home also has the potential to interfere with your work-life balance. It's not as easy to clock out at 5:00, or whenever your goal time is, because you're already at home. It's not like you have to try and beat traffic to make it home by a certain time. This is true even more so when you're doing what you love. It's so easy for the day to fly by before you realize the sun has set and you're still working. This is another reason why making a schedule should be a priority as you take part in the work-from-home lifestyle.
It's A Money-Saver
Saving money on standard life expenses like gas, grabbing coffee, or going out to lunch daily is a major plus of being a part of the work-from-home community. Depending on the city you live in, if you work at home, you might not even need a car if the public transportation system is legit. This could save you hundreds of dollars a month alone. There's also no lunch meetings with co-workers, meaning you can load up on groceries and make a lunch instead of feeling obligated to go out to eat consistently.
Sidebar: While there are a number of tax breaks for those who work from home, if you're freelancing and your taxes aren't being taken out of your check, you definitely want to make sure you're setting money aside so you're not shocked when you file your taxes. I would recommend calling the IRS or speaking with a tax expert to determine how much you should save.
Related: The Best Way To Budget For Taxes When You Are Self-Employed
It Gets Redundant
Just like working in an office, working from home in the same environment every day can get super boring; especially if you're confined to a small space like a bedroom or separate room designated for work. Thankfully, this is a problem with an easy solution, considering all you have to do is switch up your environment to get a change of pace. Before recent events, I would have dubbed Starbucks as the go-to but there's also Panera Bread or a local library. A new scenery could also spark creativity and get you inspired and motivated.
It Can't Just Be You, Yourself… And You
Aside from working in the same room constantly, you have the potential of literally making yourself go crazy if you're at home alone all day; especially if you're an extrovert who thrives off of the energy of others. Yes, you can probably call a friend every once in a while, without worrying about coworkers who are side eyeing you for making private calls. But that can only do so much. I would suggest taking things a step further and going to lunch with a friend frequently or finding a group of people who also work from home that you can work with regularly. You can get together at a local coffee shop or make a rotation of whose house you'll work at one day a week. Either way, you have to have consistent face-to-face contact with peers so you don't go insane.
Your Fitness Is At A Minimum
Working from home doesn't require you to take nearly as many steps as working in an outside office. After all, your biggest commute is probably from the bed to the home office to the kitchen and back again. And in between there, you're most likely sitting pretty and stagnant, and doing what you love to do. Still, while the fitness is at a minimum from working from home, it can also be a positive too. A good idea is to schedule time to take a walk or do a quick workout video to make sure you keep moving.
You'll Be More Productive And Happier
Research shows those who work from home are not only more productive but also happier. Studies also revealed that working from home helps with efficiency and lowers stress. The freedom of working at your own pace combined with the satisfaction of being making minor and major moves as you check items off your daily to-do list brings a level of gratification and pleasure that will have you wanting to pat yourself on the back.
If you're thinking about taking that leap and working from home, it could definitely be a good move for you. Just keep in mind the realities of all that comes with it.
Featured image by Sincerely Media on Unsplash
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So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.
In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.
In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.
And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.
We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.
So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.
That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.
This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
Featured image by xoStaff
Apparently, there was a Thanksgiving episode that featured all of the friends having dinner together. And y’all, there was simply no way that I was going to mention the latter without shouting out the original (amen?).
Okay, so with that out of the way — Friendsgiving. Something that I appreciate about twists to holidays like this is that it’s a reminder that there is no one way to celebrate special occasions. And so, if, for whatever the reason, you will not or cannot be with family during the holiday season, there are certainly other alternatives at your disposal.
That being said, if the thought of spending time with friends this Thanksgiving is something that you’d like to do, yet you’re not sure how to host it in a way that will make Friendsgiving a fan favorite for your entire circle — I’ve got 10 suggestions that can make the planning process easy as pumpkin (or sweet potato) pie.
1. Position Chrysanthemums or Orchids for Your Table Décor
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Let’s start with décor first. Listen, aside from cleaning up your place, you don’t have to be over the top. If you put together a really nice centerpiece or put a flower at each table setting, honestly, you’re all good. And if you’re someone who is big on details and symbolism, my recommendation would be to go with some chrysanthemums and/or orchids.
When it comes to chrysanthemums, not only are they a peak fall flower, they represent things like friendship and happiness. And orchids? They tend to bloom during the fall and spring seasons and, not only are they about luxury, certain orchid colors also symbolize friendship (for the record, yellow roses symbolize friendship too). Perfect.
2. Incorporate Scents That Cultivate Gratitude
Speaking of cultivating a warm and inviting space, you can never go wrong with scented soy candles — or at least having an essential oil diffuser in a few spots. Some scents that actually help to bring in the spirit of gratitude include vanilla, jasmine, ginger, cedarwood and frankincense.
3. Use Upscale Paper Products to Dine With
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Let’s be real — a lot more of us would probably host events in our home if it wasn’t for the mess that is left behind in our kitchen once the festivities are over. Wanna avoid that? Use paper plates. No, I don’t mean the cheap Styrofoam ones. SMDH. These days, there are paper (and plastic) plate brands that will low-key blow your mind when it comes to how bougie they look. Some that are worth considering are located here, here and here.
4. Handwrite Thank-You Notes (Use Them As Place Settings)
If you’re like Tiffany (from the HBO series Insecure — what a time) was at that memorable dinner party when all hell broke loose between Lawrence and Issa and you’re pretty anal — I mean, particular — LOL — about place settings, it’s a nice touch to pick up some blank thank-you cards that you can write a personalized “I’m thankful for you because…” message in. Place each one where you’d like each friend to sit. They won’t see it coming and it’s a really nice touch.
5. Have Everyone Bring Their Favorite Homemade Dish
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Okay, and what if what has you on the fence about hosting is you don’t feel like doing a ton of cooking? Chile, this is where the concept of having a potluck comes in. Get everyone to bring the dish that they claim they cook the best and make sure to let them know how many individuals you plan on coming (so that they will make enough). You can even make a game out of it by having everyone anonymously vote for the first, second and third best dishes out of the bunch. Take it up a notch by having a prize for each winner.
6. Take a Warm Drink and Dessert Poll Beforehand
You know what isn’t discussed enough about dinner parties? Folks bringing desserts that other people don’t even like. SMDH. You can avoid this from becoming an issue at your Friendsgiving by sending an email (most people prefer that to group chats; let’s be real — and make sure to BCC everyone as well) asking everyone to share what their top three favorite desserts and warm drinks are. Then pick the top 2-3 out of the bunch. That way, you won’t have a ton of (for instance) coffee cake or apple cider lying around that no one even wanted in the first place.
7. Create a Signature Friendsgiving Mocktail and Cocktail
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Speaking of drinks, another way to make your Friendsgiving memorable is to come up with a signature mocktail (for those who don’t consume alcohol) and cocktail. For the mocktail, you can also poll your friends about their favorite mocktail or fruits and come up with a mixture of your own. For the cocktail — although National Friendship Day is actually in August, I did peep that there are certain drinks that have been created in its honor. Some of them are located here for you to do a bit of tweaking on (if you’d like).
8. Ask Everyone to Share Their “Favorite Friend Quality” of Another
You know how it’s customary for everyone to go around and share what they are truly thankful for before having dinner? Well, to continue along with the Friendsgiving theme, have each person share what their favorite friend quality is about the person to their right. If folks are just meeting each other for the first time, instead they can share what they value the most in friendship overall, along with a story of how it was displayed to them personally over the past 12 months.
9. Send Each of Your Guests Home with a Fresh Gratitude Journal
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Wanna send folks home with a nice parting gift? It would be so on-trend to give each of them a gratitude journal. Listen, we are in some crazy times right through here (at least in the States) and so, encouraging your friends to set some time aside, regularly, to think about and then outwardly express what they are grateful for? That helps to keep stress down, keep things in perspective and it reminds us all to maintain a positive mindset as much as possible.
10. Watch a Nostalgic Movie
While everyone is enjoying dessert and drinks, how about watching a movie that brings back fond memories? A list of some of the most popular movies to come out previous Thanksgiving weekends is located here and a list of some favorite Black holiday-themed films can be found here. It’s a way to wind down and share some laughs before everyone heads home.
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Friendsgiving. What a wonderful way to celebrate your friends while also observing Thanksgiving in a way that is totally on your terms. And now that you know how to put it together, what are you waiting for? Hit your friends up and let them know that, whether it’s on actual Thanksgiving Day or a few days before or after, you’ve got a special dinner in mind.
One that has a good time with amazing friends written ALL over it.
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Featured image by PeopleImages/Shutterstock