Tracee Ellis Ross Is Unapologetic About Being ‘Good Enough’
So, I'm one of those people who believes that we genuinely do not deserve Tracee Ellis Ross. My fascination with her rings true, as she proves time and time again that she is a walking deity in this shit, breaking out of the mold of the one thing that society tells us a black woman can be.
She has had one of the most drool-worthy upbringings (which she once compared to Blue Ivy), starred in two of the greatest sitcoms to hit television airwaves, has a high-profile, über successful business, and has one of the most banging energies (and bodies) in all of Hollywood. And she's a front-line advocate of 'teaching us all to get to know ourselves, to own our dreams and desires, to celebrate our individual paths, and to make space for people to follow their own paths too.'
How Tracee Ellis Ross manages to humbly offer some of the most unapologetic wisdom to the culture, I'll never know, but I damn sure welcome it.
Ross recently sat down with Glennon Doyle (Together Rising) for the Forbes Power Women Summit 2020, to discuss all the above. And the entire interview was brimming with top-tier advice, laughs, and quotables--just as we expected.
It opened with immediate nuggets, Doyle asking, "We have to do these things, we have to show up still, but how are you doing with this 'COVID world'?" To which Ross answered beautifully:
"You know, even as we were setting up our tech for this, [I thought], good enough can be good enough. I'm not always my favorite version of myself in this and I don't seem to have access to some of my favorite things in life. It's a conscious effort to really cultivate things that anchor me to myself, to joy, and to connection and collective energy, because I like that energy a lot."
Doyle and Ross who come across as old friends catching up on the woes of the world never missed a beat.
The ladies went on to chat about the importance of detaching their self-worth from others' opinions:
"Particularly for women, we have been raised in a patriarchal structure in which we are so busy seeing ourselves from the outside, not even through a loving friend's gaze, but through a judgmental man's gaze. That is so confusing. I've tried to be all of the different things and the truth is, I'm best at being me.
This rings true, particularly with Ross expressing her struggles of being pressured to operate on societal deadlines when it comes to being a wife and mother in the past--which she absolutely refuses to subscribe to.
"Finally, then came the journey of: how do I find the courage to actually be the person that I know I am, and then even maybe on some days like her?
"And even if I don't like her—and even if there's a favorite version of me and my not-favorite version of me and all these different kinds—how do I be kind to her, no matter what?"
Her bright smile, which feature a bomb red lip shined through as she finished:
"I feel like the truth of who I am, personally, is the truth of who I am professionally. I bring that same person, my same intentions, the same whole self goes into all of these aspects."
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Adrian Marcel On Purpose, Sacrifice, And The 'Signs Of Life'
In this week's episode of xoMAN, host Kiara Walker talked with R&B artist Adrian Marcel, who opened up, full of heart and authenticity, about his personal evolution. He discussed his days transitioning from a young Bay Area singer on the come-up to becoming a grounded husband and father of four.
With honesty and introspection, Marcel reflected on how life, love, and loss have shaped the man he is today.
On ‘Life’s Subtle Signals’
Much of the conversation centered around purpose, sacrifice, and listening to life’s subtle signals. “I think that you really have to pay attention to the signs of life,” Marcel said. “Because as much as we need to make money, we are not necessarily on this Earth for that sole purpose, you know what I mean?” While he acknowledged his ambitions, adding, “that is not me saying at all I’m not trying to ball out,” he emphasized that fulfillment goes deeper.
“We are here to be happy. We are here [to] fulfill a purpose that we are put on here for.”
On Passion vs. Survival
Adrian spoke candidly about the tension between passion and survival, describing how hardship can sometimes point us away from misaligned paths. “If you find it’s constantly hurting you… that’s telling you something. That’s telling you that you’re going outside of your purpose.”
Marcel’s path hasn’t been without detours. A promising athlete in his youth, he recalled, “Early on in my career, I was still doing sports… I was good… I had a scholarship.” An injury changed everything. “My femur broke. Hence why I always say, you know, I’m gonna keep you hip like a femur.” After the injury, he pivoted to explore other careers, including teaching and corporate jobs.
“It just did not get me—even with any success that happened in anything—those times, back then, I was so unhappy. And you know, to a different degree. Like not just like, ‘I really want to be a singer so that’s why I’m unhappy.’ Nah, it was like, it was not fulfilling me in any form or fashion.”
On Connection Between Pursuing Music & Fatherhood
He recalled performing old-school songs at age 12 to impress girls, then his father challenged him: “You can lie to these girls all you want, but you're really just lying to yourself. You ain't growing.” That push led him to the piano—and eventually, to his truth. “Music is my love,” Marcel affirmed. “I wouldn’t be a happy husband if I was here trying to do anything else just to appease her [his wife].”
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by xoNecole/YouTube
Roscoe Dash joined xoMan host Kiara Walker to share the journey of his personal and spiritual evolution—from the party anthems that made him famous to a deeper life rooted in faith, family, and purpose. This episode offers an honest look at how the artist has grown beyond early fame, addressing fatherhood, masculinity, creativity, and healing.
Dash opened up about the internal transformation that has guided him away from chasing the spotlight and toward seeking peace. “Faith and fear can’t occupy the same space,” he said, underscoring his shift toward a more spiritually grounded life. Throughout the interview, he emphasized the importance of self-reflection:
“The most important conversations to me, honestly, outside of the ones you have with God, is the ones you have with yourself in the mirror.”
Dash is focused on the man he’s become. “I’m not the accolades I’ve achieved—I’m the person who achieved them,” he added, pointing to a broader understanding of identity and worth. A large part of that growth has come through fatherhood, especially raising daughters, which he said has deepened his understanding of love. “Love is unconditional and love loves to love no matter what,” he shared.
He also spoke candidly about the pressures of fame and its impact on creativity. “Chasing fame can kill your creativity as a musician,” he warns. Instead, his advice to other artists is simple but clear: “Keep your focus on your art form, whatever that may be, and stay passionate.”
The conversation also touches on gender dynamics and emotional safety in relationships. “Safe men make soft women. If she feels safe, she’ll melt like butter,” he said, challenging traditional notions of masculinity. Roscoe also offers wisdom on discernment and spiritual testing: “Sometimes the devil will give you what looks better than your blessing.”
Ultimately, Dash has learned to embrace peace over chaos. “All I can do is control what I can control. And that's how I respond to things and what I'm giving out,” he said. It’s a thoughtful, soulful side of Roscoe Dash that many may not expect—but one that leaves a lasting impression.
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by xoNecole/YouTube