The 'Mercedes' Experience: Six Tips On Giving Your Partner The Sexiest Lap Dance
In season two of the hit drama series, P-Valley, we watched in awe as Mercedes (Brandee Evans) effortlessly glided up and down the pole, showing off her ultra-sexy dance moves in the privacy of her client’s home – dubbing it as the “Mercedes Experience.” If you’ve ever explored the idea of surprising your partner with a lap dance but cringed at the thought of embarrassing yourself, we’re here to help.
The good news is, you don’t have to be a pro to pull off a few sensual moves for your partner – you don’t even need a pole! If you’re interested in recreating a sexy moment from The Pynk or just looking to 'drop it like a thotty' for a lucky someone, we’ve talked to Zippora, a pole dance fitness instructor and personal trainer, for helpful tips on how to unleash your inner performer.
With over 10 years of experience, Zippora has performed stunt double work as Mercedes on the P-Valley pilot and as Anika Noni Rose’s character in BET’s The Quad. She’s also appeared in the music videos of Lil’ Baby and August Alsina, and has performed with Latto and Snoop Dogg. Keep reading for her pro tips on how to give a sexy lap dance to your partner.
1. Set the Mood
Giphy“You want your partner to be relaxed and ready to consume all of what your performance has to offer, so setting the mood for them will be a great way to help put them in that headspace. Try to cater to as many senses as possible. You can try dimming the lights and lighting scented candles,” Zippora explained.
“If they love massages, you could gently stroke a part of their body as you guide them to the location of your performance. You could also provide sweet treats and a beverage for them to graze on while you are getting ready. Remember, you are the mood so whatever you choose to create the ambiance, these are all mere accessories to help enhance your special moment.”
2. Assemble a Sexy Playlist
Giphy“The music will set the tone for your performance, so understanding what feeling you are looking to evoke and what level of energy you would like to bring is necessary in pulling your performance together,” Zippora said. “You also want to play with songs and rhythms that you find your body moves easiest to. Both an up-tempo and a slower cadence could work well, as long as it feels natural to your body. Some of my favorite artists who are setting the mood for me right now are Azee, Tanerélle, Giveon, Olafur Arnalds, dvsn, Sabrina Claudio, and the song 'SMTS' by Jeremih.”
3. Do a Quick Stretch
Giphy“Stretching plays an integral part in your performance because it allows your body to move at its fullest potential once it’s warm and loose. Dynamic stretches and movements are best to get the muscles warm and agile. Try to pay close attention to your shoulders for a variety of arm extensions, shoulder rolls, or any lifting you may include in your show,” Zippora described.
“Your waist and back are a dynamic duo that must have an honorable mention in warming up your body. Stretching these two areas will be key to bringing your upper half and lower half of your body together working in unison. After that, stretching your legs will give you the support you need to entice your viewer. Remember to keep your core engaged throughout the entire movement. Your body will thank you for this later while you’re giving all the energy in your performance.”
4. Pick a Seductive Outfit
Giphy“Choose something that accentuates your most desirable assets while also wearing something that you feel comfortable and confident in. An option could be eight-inch heels with an oversized t-shirt and a thong so that you can put those legs and glutes on display. Or you could try a revealing strappy bondage bodysuit with coordinating foot straps that allow you to flex your curvy silhouette while dominating and taming the moment,” Zippora said.
5. Perform Sultry Dance Moves
Giphy“Your body is a work of art that you are putting on display, so think of each sway of a curve, each point of an extension, each body roll, and every strut and pirouette as a brush stroke. Paint the picture of the story you are trying to convey to your viewer. Standing and facing your partner with arms extended overhead, for example, while rolling your hips then quick-turning your back to them following a deep bend over is a great way to get their attention and begin your expressively seductive story," Zippora explained.
She continued, "Opening your legs with pointed toes for a full spread and gently alternating bending each knee can make your performance more dynamic. However, you decide to create your choreography, move your body in a way that makes you feel sexy so choose movements that appear effortless, that visually give you the air of strength and makes you appear the most tantalizing.”
6. Be Confident
Giphy“The most important thing is to have fun. Try not to take yourself too seriously as this experience should be enjoyable without any stress. Be mindful of your breathing to relax your mind and body. The more relaxed you are, the more free and confident you will feel to truly be you,” Zippora noted.
“With regards to your partner, try to make the moment interactive to help sustain the engagement by giving your partner queues of when and where to look and touch. Knowing your partner is completely present and attentive, will provide you the strength and boldness to easily beguile and command the mood with indelible confidence.”
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This Black Woman-Owned Creative Agency Shows Us The Art Of Rebranding
Rebranding is an intricate process and very important to the success of businesses that want to change. However, before a business owner makes this decision, they should determine whether it's a rebrand or an evolution.
That's where people like Lola Adewuya come in. Lola is the founder and CEO of The Brand Doula, a brand development studio with a multidisciplinary approach to branding, social media, marketing, and design.
While an evolution is a natural progression that happens as businesses grow, a rebrand is a total change. Lola tells xoNecole, "A total rebrand is necessary when a business’s current reputation/what it’s known for is at odds with the business’s vision or direction.
"For example, if you’ve fundamentally changed what your product is and does, it’s likely that your brand is out of alignment with the business. Or, if you find your company is developing a reputation that doesn’t serve it, it might be time to pump the brakes and figure out what needs to change.
She continues, "Sometimes you’ll see companies (especially startups) announce a name change that comes with updated messaging, visuals, etc. That usually means their vision has changed or expanded, and their previous branding was too narrow/couldn’t encompass everything they planned to do."
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The Brand Doula was born in 2019, and its focus is on putting "the experiences, goals, and needs of women of color founders first," as well as brands with "culture-shifting missions."
According to Lola, culture-shifting is "the act of influencing dominant behavior, beliefs, or experiences in a community or group (ideally, for the better)."
"At The Brand Doula, we work with companies and leaders that set out to challenge the status quo in their industries and communities. They’re here to make an impact that sends ripples across the market," she says.
"We help the problem solvers of the world — the ones who aren't satisfied with 'this is how it's always been' and instead ask 'how could this be better?' Our clients build for impact, reimagining tools, systems, and ways of living to move cultures forward."
The Brand Doula has worked with many brands, including Too Collective, to assist with their collaboration with Selena Gomez's Rare Beauty and Balanced Black Girl for a "refresh," aka rebrand. For businesses looking to rebrand, Lola shares four essential steps.
1. Do an audit of your current brand experience — what’s still relevant and what needs to change? Reflect on why you’re doing the rebrand in the first place and what success would look like after relaunching.
2. Tackle the overall strategy first — before you start redesigning logos and websites, align on a new vision for your brand. How do you want your company to be positioned moving forward? Has your audience changed at all? Will your company have a fresh personality and voice?
3. Bring your audience along the journey — there’s no need to move in secret. Inviting your current audience into the journey can actually help them feel more connected to and invested in your story, enough to stick around as changes are being made.
4. Keep business moving — one of my biggest pet peeves is when companies take down their websites as soon as they have the idea to rebrand, then have a Coming Soon page up for months! You lose a lot of momentum and interest by doing that. If you’re still in business and generating income, continue to operate while you work on your rebrand behind the scenes. You don’t want to cut existing customers off out of the blue, and you also don’t want so much downtime that folks forget your business exists or start looking for other solutions.
While determining whether the rebrand was successful may take a few months, Lola says a clear sign that it is unsuccessful is negative feedback from your target audience. "Customers are typically more vocal about what they don’t like more than what they do like," she says.
But some good signs to look out for are improvements in engagement with your marketing, positive reviews, press and increase in retention, and overall feeling aligned with the new branding.
For more information about Lola and The Brand Doula, visit her website, thebranddoula.com.
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Halle Berry On Aging Like Fine Wine: 'I've Always Known That I've Been More Than This Face'
If "aging like a fine wine" was a person, it'd be Halle Berry.
The 58-year-old Never Let Go star recently donned the cover of Marie Claire magazine and she let it be known that though people have highly regarded her beauty and her body throughout much of her career, she is happy to be at an age now where "people will focus on the other aspects of me that I think are way more interesting."
"I’ve always known that I’ve been more than this face and more than this body," she shares with Marie Claire.
The actress and wellness founder has never felt as defined by her looks as she does by the aspects of herself and her nature that she has carefully cultivated through lived experience, knowledge and wisdom gained, her craft and accolades, her motherhood-- she insists that those are the things about herself that move her the most. "I do take ownership over those things that I’ve worked really hard at, and if somebody finds value in those things that lights me up," she tells them.
With physically demanding roles like her directorial turn in Bruised (where she also played double duty as the film's star) and John Wick 3: Parabellum and the recently-released The Union, it's clear Halle isn't letting age slow her career down or stop her from taking on the types of roles that excite her inner child. She told Marie Claire age ain't nothin but a number:
"Age is just a number that they stick on us at birth. As women, we get defined by it way more than men do and sometimes it can debilitate us. It can trick us into thinking what we’re supposed to do. We have to kick that in the face and say, 'No, I’m going to do what I can do as long as I feel good doing it!' And that will be whatever I want it to be. I get to define that."
For Halle, doing what she can do looks like prioritizing her health which was never for aesthetic reasons as it was for longevity reasons. The actress received a diabetes diagnosis in her 20s and has managed to stay off insulin by staying away from sugar. She tells Marie Claire, "Sugar is the enemy. You couldn’t put anything sweet in front of me right now and pay me to eat it. I’m just not interested."
Halle attributes being at what she calls "the pinnacle" of her life and "feeling better and stronger than I did when I was in my 20s" to a regimen that centers on her health and wellness. This includes non-negotiables like daily workouts, red light therapy, progesterone, and hot and cold therapy, to name a few.
Read more of her Marie Claire cover story here.
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