
Where Do You Draw The Line Between Relationships & Work-Life Balance? 7 ‘Insecure’ Fans Sound Off

We may be on day 2,987 of quarantine, but we're only up to episode four of Insecure, "Lowkey Losin' It", and it was anything but lowkey.
Previously, we asked fans "Could YOU be friends with your ex's new bae?" after Issa's throuple (as Molly puts it) with Lawrence and Condola got complicated. There were multiple storylines going on this latest episode, but Molly and Andrew's brought up an all-new relationship pickle that's relatable AF.
Here's what you missed if you missed it, so brace yourself for spoilers…
Workaholic Molly kept putting her dates with Andrew on the back burner when it came to her work at the law firm. Late nights at the office and late nights on her laptop at home came before spending quality time with him.
To be fair, her relationship with Asian Bae is fairly new and Molly's super passionate about her career where she constantly needs to be on her A game. All in all, the couple was able to move forward after talking it out. #MollyAndAsianBae4Ever
Quarantine got all of us wishing for hugs from the back... or is it just me? 🙋🏾♀️🙋🏾♀️🙋🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️ #InsecureHBO pic.twitter.com/UrP3X0uHqb
— Yvonne Orji (@YvonneOrji) May 4, 2020
It's no secret relationship and work-life balance can be tough, especially those with demanding careers. But after watching this episode, my friends and I discussed exactly how we handle this. I can relate to this all too well. I've definitely blown off plans with friends and family because of a deadline or job function. I've also been the girlfriend spending quality time with my guy watching an awards show while simultaneously reporting on it from my laptop. It just is what is what is. Like Molly, not only am I perfectionist when it comes to what I do for a living, but it's my passion. Of course, there has to be balance for any relationship to work, but ideally I'd like to be with someone who understands my work, and possibly is in the same industry or related field.
That sounds like I'm asking a lot, and maybe I am, but it's much easier for someone to get it when they can relate. At, the very least having a partner who is equally passionate about their work, whatever it may be, is always helpful (not to mention, attractive). Andrew isn't a lawyer like Molly, but I'm sure his work in the entertainment industry will bring up limitations to his free time at some point and Molly will have to show him the same understanding he showed her.
But different strokes for different folks, am I right? So, I reached out to Insecure fans to ask them:
Where do you draw the line between work relationship and work-life balance? Would you have stuck around like Andrew did with Molly?
Quality Time Over Money
"[Being an entrepreneur, my situation is] unique in that I truly own my time. With that being said, I find nothing more important than time with loved ones. So, for me, I couldn't be putting my partner on the back burner for a check, no time with a company is worth more time with my woman. But I worked hard to put myself in a position where I won my time and my income isn't dependent on hours but on value." –Jeffrey Derose, Founder, Startup Advisory Group
Relationships Take Empathy and Understanding
"It is not realistic to have a personality like Molly's and disregard your work obligations. She would also only similarly be attracted to someone who takes their work seriously. There is no real way to build a partnership otherwise. We have watched her cycle through many partners and, for some of them, an obstacle was their career limitations. It is very easy to dismiss Black women as overly committed to success and not to relationships, but it is also understandable why Molly would behave that way.
"Work never lets you down. It is a very simple system. You work hard and you get paid. It's very simple. In relationships, things are infinitely more complicated."
"Being with Andrew requires more energy and vulnerability than she can just deflect at work. It is a big step that she recognized where she was being unfair and decided to apologize. I think relationships take empathy and understanding and you know when someone is being genuine or not. I think Andrew knew Molly was trying her best and therefore made an allowance for her. It's mature on both of their parts." –Danielle Prescod, Style Director, BET Networks
It's the Little Things
"My last relationship basically ended because of this. When you are passionate about your career, it almost feels like cheating when you have to step away from the computer to go on a date. Especially in a new relationship, it's hard to shift gears and make a new commitment to this person. I've come to the conclusion that being driven and independent is great, but your partner wants to feel like a priority too; they want to feel needed. So, it's important to keep things interesting with spontaneous little actions that show you're always thinking of them.
"My ex would love when I FaceTimed him randomly, or when I made plans that had to do with things he was into. I also learned to invite them into your world as much as possible, and volunteer to help them when things got busy on their end. As soon as things feel one-sided, someone isn't feeling appreciated, or someone doesn't feel like a priority... it's hard to reel it back in. I think Molly got lucky with her boo because he's always busy too, so though he felt a type of way, he gets it." –Hala Maroc, Personality/Wellness Advocate TheBadassBootcamp.com
Drive and Ambition Are Two Attractive Qualities In A Spouse
"I'd say this is something that can be worked out smoothly. It's all about prioritizing your time; Molly is extremely ambitious, and she should be allowed to have a great career and relationship. For me, I've made sure to carve out time during the weekend and certain times out of the work week for my spouse. While keeping in mind some down time for myself.
"I'd never stand in the way of my spouse's goals and would likely be as calm about the situation as Andrew was. It's all about BALANCE. Drive and ambition are two attractive qualities in a spouse. I see nothing wrong with openly communicating if things ever feel off-balanced. Balance, communication and trust are the building blocks for a long-lasting relationship. In short, I'm rooting for Molly and Asian bae all the way!" –India Douglas, Licensed Master Social Worker (LMSW)
Set A Personal/Work-Life Standard
"When you are in a relationship, work/business intertwines with life/personal. This was one of my New Year's Resolution: 'Do not bring work life home; do not talk about work at the dinner table; PTO does not mean check your work email.' This was important to me because there wasn't a balance and setting a goal for myself made me realize, life is NOT all about work.
"Andrew felt neglected by Molly, and when your main priority is work, whether it is discussing a meeting that happened/conflict with your coworkers or constantly working late at night or on the weekends, it takes a toll on the relationship. But for Andrew and Molly to discuss their issues shows how much they are committed to the relationship. Adapting to change, learning, balancing personal/work life, and growing as a unit is all about being in a relationship." –Kateri Fischer, On-Air Scheduling Coordinator, BET Networks
If It’s Important to Me I Make Time for It
"I've never had trouble balancing work and my love life. If it's important to me, I make time for it. If I'm feeling the person, I would stick around like Andrew did and discuss my feelings and thoughts like he did." –Amiyah Deziire, Author, Midnight Confessions
What You Accept, Will Always Be What You Get
"At the end of the day, it's not so much our profession that keep us consumed, so much as it is our perfectionism. Working in entertainment journalism, especially as it pertains to the competitive blogging space, will have you thinking that every bit of celeb news is 'breaking.' [I recall a first date with a new guy] who revealed that he had plans for a waterfront dinner at a marina about 40 minutes away from where I lived in NY. This made me a bit anxious since I didn't want to be too far from home and my laptop. So, I suggested just going to a diner nearby which he found strange since I pretty much trumped his romantic efforts, but he went along with it.
"Everything was going great, until my then-boss messaged me asking to put up a post. I began to draft a response asking her if I could write it on my phone and send it to her instead. In that moment, my priority was still to get the work done, no matter what. When I looked up at my date, he seemed so lost. Not frustrated. Just, lost. I could tell he still liked me but was probably conflicted on whether to knock my hustle. I was being so apologetic about the interruptions, that it delayed damage, and softened the blow. Still, I hated that I was losing his interest. In that moment, I decided to call my boss, and reluctantly tell her I was on a date. She immediately said, 'Girl, why didn't you tell me? Go enjoy your date. I'll get another person to post it. Don't worry!'
"I realized we create our own boundaries. What you accept, will always be what you get. A boss is never going to stop a worker bee from buzzing, especially when you're a 'bee' like me who takes pride in her hive (aka my job). But if you don't speak up, no one will say 'no' for you either."
"And at the end of the day, unless you're a doctor or performing life-saving services, you are in the position to say 'no,' more often than you think." –Soraya "Sojo," Digital Director + Personality
Featured image via Insecure/HBO
Jazmine A. Ortiz is a creative born and raised in Bushwick, Brooklyn and currently living in Staten Island, NY. She started in the entertainment industry in 2012 and now works as a Lifestyle Editor where she explores everything from mental health to vegan foodie trends. For more on what she's doing in the digital space follow her on Instagram at @liddle_bitt.
Your May 2025 Monthly Horoscopes Are All About Blooming Softly & Trusting Divine Timing
May is about being patient, nurturing your dreams, and creating beauty in your world. This is a more stable and generous month than the chaos that April brought, and we get an opportunity for closure, healing, and rejuvenation this month. We are still amid some important retrograde transits, but these are ones we can navigate better by grounding our energy in the present moment, and not allowing ourselves to stress over the what-ifs.
With the Sun in Taurus for most of the month, May reminds us that there is beauty in finding your peace and not allowing anyone to disrupt that.
Pluto goes retrograde in Aquarius from May 4 until October 13, and this will be a time of remembering your power when it comes to your purpose, innovations, and the ability to attract support into your life. Mercury moves into Taurus on May 10, making this a good time for negotiations, creating new plans financially, and sticking to your word on something that holds value to you. The Full Moon of the month occurs in Scorpio on May 12, and this is the Flower Moon of the year, signifying growth and seeing the beauty in your life.
This Full Moon is all about letting go of what doesn’t feel authentic or resonate with you emotionally, and about experiencing more closure and healing within relationship matters.
Your May 2025: A Monthly Overview
Gemini Season officially begins on May 20, and we enter air sign energy, which is good for communication, business, and coming up with inspiring and new ideas. On May 24, Saturn enters Aries, beginning its new transit where it will remain for the next few years. Saturn in Aries is bold, direct, and straightforward, but so are its lessons. There is a gift in resilience and finding your strength during this time, and this transit will show you where your power is, but it may challenge you to confront self-limiting behavior in the process.
Mercury enters Gemini on May 25, and Mercury loves being here. Mercury in Gemini is the creative genius, and this is a month of aligning yourself with this energy. On May 26, we have a New Moon in Gemini, and it’s time to set your intentions for where you want a communication breakthrough in your life, and what new ideas you want to start planting the seeds for. This is a good New Moon for networking, exchanging ideas, having more fun, and getting inspired.
Article continues after the jump.
May 2025 Horoscopes for Every Zodiac Sign
Keep reading for your sun, moon, and rising sign below to see what May has in store for you.
ARIES
The impact from April is finally behind you, and you get to move forward this month, Aries. After a month of retrogrades and Eclipses, you are starting to see the progress of what you have been working towards financially this year. The Sun is in your 2nd house of abundance, self-confidence, and values this month, and you are putting your dreams here first.
With Venus also in Aries for the entire month of May, you are feeling the support within and without this month, and this is a beautiful month unfolding.
On May 24, Saturn enters your sign, beginning its transit in Aries, which will last for the next few years. Saturn is the master of tough love, and you are going to be learning a lot about yourself during his time and going through a growth spurt. The New Moon of May is at the end of the month on May 26 and will be giving you the answers and clarity you have been looking for, highlighting open communication in your life. Overall, this is your month of fewer obstacles and more progress.
TAURUS
Taurus Season is officially underway, and you are the main character right now, Taurus. Remember that. This month is about trusting your intuition and the timing of things, and knowing that things are working in your favor. With Venus, your ruling planet, in your 12th house for the month, you are seeking a lot of closure and culmination right now and are healing what was. Mercury enters your sign from May 10 until May 25, and it’s all about the perspectives you are gaining right now.
Don’t be afraid to ask the important questions and get down to the bottom of things that have been worrying you. On May 12, there is a Full Moon in your 7th house of partnership, and you are closing the door on what has not been working for you in love. You are seeing the clarity of what you need within your emotional world and how you want to navigate the changes you have been through here now.
GEMINI
May is a new beginning for you, Gemini. You have a lot of energy and vitality with you this month, and you are ready to accomplish some personal goals and intentions of yours. For most of the month, the Sun is in your house of closure and healing, and you are finding yourself rejuvenated from the transformations you have been through. Gemini Season officially begins on May 20, and with the Sun in your sign, nothing is holding you back from shining and living in your truth right now.
On May 25, Mercury enters Gemini until June 8, and Mercury loves being in your sign, as this is your planetary ruler.
Mercury in Gemini is forward-thinking, quick, and intelligent. You are coming up with solutions to previous challenges or obstacles, and overcoming something that has felt restrictive mentally. Before the month ends, there is a New Moon in Gemini on May 26, and this New Moon is one of the best times of the year for you to set your intentions and manifest your dreams. Remember you are worthy of what you are setting out to accomplish this month, Gemini.
CANCER
Cancer, this month requires you to slow down, take care of your health, and allow things to come to fruition the way they are meant to. There is a chance you could be overthinking more than usual this month, and you are being reminded that there is only so much that is in your control, and to give yourself some more grace. The Full Moon in Scorpio on May 12 will help you gain a little more clarity of the heart and is going to be a time of feeling the love and appreciation in your life.
Saturn enters your 10th house of career on May 24, remaining here over the next few years, and you are getting an opportunity to grow and discover where you may have been limiting yourself professionally, socially, or within your aspirations in life. This time is all about reminding yourself that you deserve recognition for the work you do, but that you must also be the one believing in yourself as well. On May 12, there is a New Moon in your house of emotional healing, and you are seeing the gifts of alone time, safe spaces, and tending to your creative inklings at the end of the month.
LEO
This month is an opportunity for a new beginning in love and progress within your emotional world, Leo. You are learning to trust your intuition more, and you are putting more of your energy into your heart’s desires. With the Sun in your 10th house for most of the month, you are shining in your truth and remaining confident in your goals in life.
Venus is in your house of adventure for the entire month, and this is a good time for experiencing romance while traveling or getting out of your comfort zone a little.
Saturn makes a significant move from Pisces into Aries at the end of the month and enters your 9th house. With Saturn here, you will be learning more about what mental growth and clarity mean to you, and this is a good time to dedicate yourself to higher education, traveling, gaining a new perspective, and honoring your integrity and values. The New Moon of the month is on May 26, creating magic within your friendships and community.
You are leaving this month with hope in your heart and new plans for the future.
VIRGO
May is a month of abundance and fruition for you, Virgo. Your dreams and intentions are coming to fruition, and you are owning that which you have created for yourself. With Venus in Aries, this is a good time for seeing support in your life financially, dedicating yourself to your commitments and responsibilities, and seeing the gifts in that. On May 12, there is a Full Moon in your 3rd house of communication, and this is an intuitive time for you, giving you the strength needed to close the chapter on what you don’t resonate with anymore.
On May 24, Saturn enters your house of shared finances, rebirth, intimacy, and resources, and over the next few years, you will be learning the importance of connecting with people who truly have your best interest at heart, and not committing to what feels unstable. Before the month ends, we have a New Moon in Gemini in your house of career, and this is a good time to manifest and set your intentions for where you want to see professional growth in your life.
Overall, May is about embracing your freedom while honoring the people and connections that help you grow and make you feel more secure in life.
LIBRA
This is a month of feeling empowered and ready to take on anything that comes your way, Libra. You are inspired by the progress you are making in your life right now, and with Venus in your 7th house of love, you are being well-received. This is a month of finding your balance between your path and the growth of your relationships, and there is a sense of support, harmony, and love in your life in May.
You are owning your authenticity and living in your truth fully, and this energy is magnetic.
However, Saturn also enters your 7th house of love this month, where it will remain for the next few years. Saturn empowers and helps you grow, but you can also feel a little more challenged within your relationships during this time. The more you can own your wants and needs, the more you can find vulnerability and support within your relationships. On May 26, a New Moon in a fellow air sign occurs and happens in your 9th house, creating a chance at a new adventure and an opportunity to discover some new inspiration.
SCORPIO
May is about believing in the impossible, Scorpio. It’s time to take a leap of faith in yourself and to remember your power. You are seeking a new beginning in your life, and with the Sun in your 7th house of love for most of the month, you are being supported and encouraged in the process. Pluto, one of your ruling planets, goes retrograde in your house of home and family from May 4 until October, and you are gaining clarity on the people and support systems you can rely on more.
The Full Moon of the month is in your sign on May 12, and this is the Flower Moon of the year. You are in full bloom and ready for whatever is next for you, and this is beautiful. Previous intentions and goals come to fruition for you overall in mid-May, and there is a lot to look forward to right now as you are getting excited about it all. Before the month ends, we have a New Moon in Gemini in your 8th house, creating a sense of empowerment through what you are looking to change and transform in your life right now.
This month is about not being afraid to take more risks and doing things your own way.
SAGITTARIUS
May is a beautiful month of magic, success, and good fortune, Sagittarius. You are feeling lucky this month and are attracting success to you in many different areas of your life. Venus, the planet of love, is in your 5th house of romance for most of the month, and you are enjoying your life, feeling the love within your heart, and expressing yourself freely in May. You are a magnet for your manifestations, and dreams are coming true for you this month, Sag.
On May 12, we have a Full Moon happening in your house of endings and closure, and you are closing out a big chapter in your life this month.
You are letting go of old pain or emotional experiences and choosing not to repeat a pattern that left you feeling hopeless before. On May 26, we have a New Moon in your sister sign, Gemini, enhancing your need for love, connection, and relationship development this month. This is a great New Moon to set your intentions for what partnerships you want to see grow, heal, and come to fruition for you. Overall, May is your month of fruition, balance, and believing in the magic in your life.
CAPRICORN
May is about slowing down and allowing yourself to find the answers you have been looking for, Capricorn. This isn’t the time to rush your progress or doubt where you are in life. The Sun is in your 5th house, and this is good for finding more time for fun, pleasure, self-care, and asking your heart what it needs. With Pluto going retrograde in your 2nd house of values and income, you are being reminded to hold yourself with integrity and to know that you are worthy of the things you are asking for.
The Full Moon on May 12 is a beautiful time to connect with loved ones or those who inspire you. The universe wants to show you that you are not alone this month and that you deserve to live a life where you can enjoy yourself more and manifest your dreams, rather than believing everything needs to be a challenge to be worthy. Saturn, your ruling planet, then enters your 4th house of home and family, and over the next few years, you are going to be rediscovering what home means to you.
AQUARIUS
Your guidance for May is to trust that what is falling from your life or changing for you is doing so for your benefit, Aquarius. Trust that what is happening is happening for you and not to you, and don’t doubt that you will rebuild from this. With Pluto going retrograde in your sign from May 4 until October 13, you need a break from some of the confusion you have been feeling in your personal life, and you are getting a chance to gain a new perspective this month.
Use this time to get inspired by change rather than let it bring you down, and ground yourself in the present moment more.
Saturn enters Aries in May, where it will remain for the next few years, helping you grow in the areas of your life that have to do with communication, networking, transportation, siblings, and education. You will be learning a lot during this time and will be finding new outlets for self-expression and communication. Before the month ends, we have a New Moon in Gemini occurring in your 5th house of romance, pleasure, hobbies, and entertainment, and after a month of navigating endings, changes, and closures, you are ready for a fresh start and are receiving one in love now.
PISCES
Allow what is to be, be, Pisces. May is a month of allowing yourself to trust the timing of the universe and not giving up hope that things are going to turn out beautifully for you. On May 12, there is a Full Moon in fellow water sign, Scorpio, and this is a time to get inspired and see the benefits of closure. This Full Moon is about gaining a new perspective and not doubting what is clearer to you now, that you are worthy of a new beginning.
On May 24, Saturn moves into your 2nd house of income, and you are going to be moving through a journey of developing financially, and working on maintaining stability while building new foundations in your life. The New Moon in Gemini at the end of the month is about setting your intentions for your home and family life and creating some new energy here. Overall, May is your month of breaking ground on the things you want to create for yourself and trusting the timing of how things are unfolding.
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Featured image by Kyra Jay for xoNecole
Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney & Jill Marie Jones On 'Games Women Play' & Dating Over 40
What do you get when you mix unfiltered truths, high-stakes romance, and a few well-timed one-liners? You get Games Women Play—the sizzling new stage play by Je’Caryous Johnson that’s part relationship rollercoaster, part grown-woman group chat.
With a powerhouse cast that includes Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney, Jill Marie Jones, Carl Payne, Chico Bean, and Brian J. White, the play dives headfirst into the messy, hilarious, and heart-wrenching games people play for love, power, and peace of mind. And the women leading this story? They’re bringing their whole selves to the stage—and leaving nothing behind.
From Script to Spotlight
The road to Games Women Play started over 20 years ago—literally.
“This script was written 20 years ago,” Jill Marie Jones said with a smile. “It was originally called Men, Money & Gold Diggers, and I was in the film version. So when Je’Caryous called me to bring it to the stage, I was like, ‘Let’s go.’” Now reimagined for 2025, the play is updated with sharp dialogue and modern relationship dynamics that feel all too real.
Demetria McKinney, no stranger to Je’Caryous Johnson’s productions, jumped at the opportunity to join the cast once again. “This is my third time working with him,” she shared. “It was an opportunity to stretch. I’d never been directed by Carl Payne before, and the chance to work with talent I admire—Jill, Claudia, Chico—it was a no-brainer.”
Claudia Jordan joked that she originally saw the role as just another check. “I didn’t take it that seriously at first,” she admitted. “But this is my first full-on tour—and now I’ve got a whole new respect for how hard people work in theater. This ain’t easy.”
Modern Love, Stage Left
The play doesn’t hold back when it comes to the messier parts of love. One jaw-dropping moment comes when a live podcast proposal flips into a prenup bombshell—leaving the audience (and the characters) gasping.
Demetria broke it down with honesty. “People don’t ask the real questions when they date. Like, ‘Do you want kids? How do you feel about money?’ These convos aren’t happening, and then everyone’s confused. That moment in the play—it’s real. That happens all the time.”
Jill chimed in, noting how the play speaks to emotional disconnect. “We’re giving each other different tokens of love. Men might offer security and money. Women, we’re giving our hearts. But there’s a disconnect—and that’s where things fall apart.”
And then Claudia, of course, took it all the way there. “These men don’t even want to sign our prenups now!” she laughed. “They want to live the soft life, too. Wearing units, gloss, getting their brows done. We can’t have nothing! Y’all want to be like us? Then get a damn period and go through menopause.”
Dating Over 40: “You Better Come Correct”
When the conversation turned to real-life relationships, all three women lit up. Their experiences dating in their 40s and 50s have given them both clarity—and zero tolerance for games.
“I feel sexier than I’ve ever felt,” said Jill, who proudly turned 50 in January. “I say what I want. I mean what I say. I’m inside my woman, and I’m not apologizing for it.”
Demetria added that dating now comes with deeper self-awareness. “Anybody in my life is there because I want them there. I’ve worked hard to need nobody. But I’m open to love—as long as you keep doing what got me there in the first place.”
For Claudia, the bar is high—and the peace is priceless. “I’ve worked hard for my peace,” she said. “I’m not dating for food. I’m dating because I want to spend time with you. And honestly, if being with you isn’t better than being alone with my candles and fountains and cats? Then no thanks.”
Channeling Strength & Icon Status
Each actress brings something different to the play—but all of them deliver.
“I actually wish I could be messier on stage,” Claudia joked. “But I think about my grandmother—she was born in 1929, couldn’t even vote or buy a house without a man, and didn’t give a damn. She was fearless. That’s where my strength comes from.”
For Jill, the comparisons to her iconic Girlfriends character Toni Childs aren’t far off—but this role gave her a chance to dig deeper. “If you really understood Toni, you’d see how layered she was. And Paisley is the same—misunderstood, but strong. There’s more to her than people see at first glance.”
Demetria, who juggles singing and acting seamlessly, shared that live theater pushes her in a new way. “Every moment on stage counts. You can’t redo anything. It’s a different kind of love and discipline. You have to give the performance away—live, in the moment—and trust that it lands.”
Laughter, Lessons & Black Girl Gems
The show has plenty of laugh-out-loud moments—and the cast isn’t shy about who steals scenes.
“Chico Bean gets a lot of gasps and laughs,” Claudia said. “And Naomi Booker? Every scene she’s in—she’s hilarious.”
But the play isn’t just about humor. It leaves space for reflection—especially for Black women.
“I hope we get back to the foundation of love and communication,” said Demetria. “A lot of us are in protector mode. But that’s turned into survival mode. We’ve lost softness. We’ve lost connection.”
Claudia agreed. “We’re doing it all—but it’s not because we want to be strong all the time. It’s because we have to be. And I just want women to know: You can have peace, you can be soft. But stop bringing your old pain into new love. Don’t let past heartbreak build walls so high that the right person can’t climb over.”
Final Act: Pack the House
If there’s one thing this cast agrees on, it’s that this play isn’t just entertainment—it’s necessary.
“Atlanta is the Black entertainment hub,” Claudia said. “We need y’all to show up for this play. Support the arts. Support each other. Because when we pack the house, we make space for more stories like this.”
Games Women Play is more than a play—it’s a mirror. You’ll see yourself, your friends, your exes, and maybe even your next chapter. So get ready to laugh, reflect, and maybe even heal—because the games are on.
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